New Start
by kristinmw afspouse
Summary: Jess Tyler moves to Charming looking for a change. When she befriends Lux Morrow, daughter of Gemma and Clay, she may find more change than she bargained for, especially when she meets Lux's sexy yet troubled brother, Jax. Can these two put aside their pride and their prejudice in order to make things work? Complete rewrite of New Start.
1. Chapter 1

**_Authors Note: _We've completely rewritten our story, New Start, originally posted under Afspouse and then finished by Kristinmw. We've kept the same OC's and the same universe along with some elements of the plot, but for the most part it's a completely new story. Both of us really loved the universe created in the original New Start, but weren't very happy with the way it turned out. We decided to update it and we hope that you all will really enjoy the story, whether you've read the original or not. **

**New Start is rated T right now for language and suggestive adult themes. We may up the rating later, but right now we feel the story is appropriately rated.**

**This story is completely AU. We've tried to keep the characters canon, but other than that, it's an alternate universe. **

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Jessica Tyler sighed as she pulled her long chestnut hair into a messy bun, giving herself a once over. Her waitress "uniform", a black V neck and jeans, complemented her 5'6" frame well but it was hardly the height of fashion. It was almost unbearable to put on, though Jess knew it had less to do with the uniform and more about the bar she worked at.

She'd made the stupid mistake of dating Ethan, the manager of the bar and son of the owner. Then she'd made the even stupider mistake of breaking it off with him. The past few months had been horrible as Ethan had done everything in his power to make her miserable and chase her away. Jess wasn't ready to give up a steady paycheck in the middle of a recession so she endured the poor treatment, but kept her eyes open for a better offer.

"You don't look happy," her Aunt Rose remarked from her seat on Jess's worn couch, snapping her out of her thoughts. Jess turned and smiled at her.

"I'm just annoyed my boss wouldn't give me the weekend off so I could spend more time with you," Jess told her. Her aunt had driven all the way down to Santa Barbara from the small town of Charming, California and Jess wanted to spend as much time as she could with her. Instead of giving her the time off, Ethan had scheduled her to work a double.

"He doesn't seem to care for you much," Rose pointed out.

"That's an understatement," Jess said with a forced smile, "He's doing everything he can to make my life as miserable as possible. He gives me the worst sections, cuts my hours…" Jess began to rant. She took a breath, not wanting to unload her problems on Rose, "That's what I get for dumping the boss," she said in a lighthearted tone.

"You should quit," Rose told her matter-of-factly.

"If I quit I'll have to start turning tricks on the corner, and nobody wants that," Jess joked as she slipped her heels on.

"You could move in with me for a while. Charming has jobs," Rose offered. Jess wasn't shocked by the offer. Ever since she'd gotten out of foster care and had managed to make contact with her aunt, Rose tried to get her to move to Charming at least once a week.

"I don't want to burden you, Aunt Rose," Jess responded, as she always did.

"I missed out on 18 years of spoiling you. I need to make up for lost time," Rose told her with a smile. It had become a running joke between them, both of them responding in the same way each time, though Rose hoped that one day Jess would change her mind.

"I'll think about it," Jess told her, though she had no intention of doing so. She checked her watch and sighed, "Well I better get going. Traffic on the 101 is always crazy and if I'm a second late Ethan'll probably fire me."

"You know where there's never any traffic?" Rose asked. Jess looked back at her grinning, knowing exactly what she was going to say, "Charming," Rose finished, grinning back. It had become a frequent ploy of Rose's to try and get Jess to move to Charming by talking up all the small town perks.

"Yes, I know. Charming has no traffic, no lines at the grocery store," Jess said, ticking the items off on her fingers, "No noise, no strangers, no crime, no long commutes."

"Damn right," Rose responded. Jess laughed and kissed her aunt on the cheek.

"I'm probably going to be late so don't wait up," she said on her way out of the door.

"You know I will," Rose told her, "I worry."

"I know," Jess told her, trying to sound annoyed, but finding it impossible to hide her smile. Even at 26, it was comforting to know that she had someone who cared so much about her.

SOASOASOA

Jess groaned as she looked the section assignments. Once again she'd gotten the smallest section closest to the front door. It was the one section in the bar where the tables didn't have a clear view of the TV, the pool tables, dart boards, or the bar. It was the last section to fill up and the first to clear out and it was usually reserved for newbies with no wait experience.

"I'm working a double for this?" Jess grumbled to herself, rolling her eyes.

"Problem?" Ethan asked her from behind the bar with a cocky grin.

"Nope," Jess said with a sarcastic smile, though in her head she was slapping the cocky right off his face.

"Oh and I won't need you tonight," He added.

"What? That means I'm not going to make shit today!" Jess spit out before stopping herself.

"Not with that attitude," He quipped, "I just thought that you wanted time off so bad, I'd do you a favor." Jess was just barely able to stop herself from rolling her eyes. She'd wanted the time off, but if she had to be there she wanted to at least make some money to make it worth her while. Now she would probably spend more in gas getting to work than she would actually make that day.

"How nice of you," She said sarcastically, tying her apron around her waist and turning away from him.

"I will need you work a double tomorrow, though. One of the barbacks isn't gonna make it, so I need you to pick up his slack," He added, clearly trying to get a rise out of her.

Jess froze. Barback was a new low for him. The barbacks were the low men on the totem pole, usually illegals that would work for next to nothing. If one called in sick, the others picked up the slack. The waitresses and bartenders were never asked to pull a shift. On top of that, he wanted her to work another double on the last day before Rose left. Ethan was trying to find her limit and he'd found it. It was time for her to push back.

"No," she told him, not bothering to turn around.

"Excuse me?" he asked in an amused tone.

"I have plans tomorrow; I'm not doing it," she said, turning and looking him square in the eyes.

"If you don't, you're fired," he said casually, leaning against the bar. Jess laughed at his audacity, shaking her head.

"Don't bother," she told him, taking off her apron and throwing it on the bar, "I quit."

"Thank God, now I don't have to pay you unemployment," Ethan said with a laugh, "Don't expect a good recommendation either." Jess smirked.

"In that case…" she said, grabbing a customer's nearly full beer and dumping it over Ethan's head. He sputtered as the customers cat-called and hollered at the scene, "Have a nice day."

SOASOASOASOA

Jess pulled her car into her usual parking space at her apartment, fuming over Ethan while simultaneously freaking out about how she was going to pay her rent this month without a job. She slammed her car door in frustration, resisting the urge to kick it, and ran up the stairs to her apartment, shoving the key in the lock before pushing the door open.

"Aunt Rose?!" Jess called as she glanced around the living room on her way to the bedroom, finding them both empty. Recalling the barrenness of her pantry, she assumed Rose must have run out for a bite to eat and hastily pulled on a pair of Nike running shorts and her tennis shoes before taking off out the front door again.

Running had always been the easiest way for Jess to get a clear head, finding it therapeutic to be lost in her own thoughts. Many people claim to get their best thinking done in the shower; for Jess, it was while running. Today, her run was fueled by anger and frustration, emotions she didn't know how to deal with. She hated Ethan; hated that she'd ever seen anything in him, hated that he had been in a position of power, able to take their break up out on her like he had. Most of all, she hated that he'd put her out of a job. It wasn't like she had a ton of money in savings; she'd been living paycheck to paycheck for as long as she could remember, struggling just to get by.

She picked up her pace, feeling the Santa Barbara sun shining brightly upon her. She relished in the sweat dripping down her neck, in her legs screaming at her to stop, in her heart beating rapidly. She relished in ignoring it all, in pushing herself harder, further. She had no idea how long she'd been running but she began to feel her endorphins kick in as the pain left her body and her problems momentarily left her mind. It was the moment she craved like a junkie. The temporary high running gave her if she was able to push herself past her limits and break through to the other side.

And once she made it to the other side, her path seemed clear. Only one option lay ahead of her and it suddenly made sense. It suddenly sounded so _easy_.

SOASOASOASOASOA

"Rose!" Jess gasped as she barged through her front door, looking around the apartment. A moment later, her aunt walked out of her bedroom.

"You're home so early!" she said. Jess nodded, filling a glass up with water and chugging it before turning back to Rose.

"That offer to move to Charming with you still stand?" she asked, suddenly feeling nervous at the slight chance of her aunt rejecting her. But Rose just beamed broadly at her.

"Always!" she said, "Anyway, when I saw your car in the parking lot, I knew something must have happened at the bar so I already started packing for you." Jess laughed as all the stress and frustration she'd been feeling a couple of hours ago suddenly washed away and Rose grabbed her, embracing her tightly.

"Rose, I'm all sweaty," Jess reminded her, but Rose only hugged her tighter.

"I don't care," she said, and Jess heard her voice catch as if she was choking up, "I'm just so glad you're coming and I can see you every day and really get to know you. You're my family and I love you, even if it took me 18 years to finally meet you." Jess didn't cry very often, but at her Aunt's sincere words she felt the tears welling up and quickly pulled apart from Rose.

"Well I better go shower," she said, rushing off to the bathroom before she lost it completely.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Two weeks later, Jess had finally unpacked her last box and was beginning to finally feel settled at her Aunt Rose's house in Charming. All that was left to do was the daunting task of finding a job. She sighed as she looked through the classifieds in the Charming Gazette, the closest thing the small town had to a newspaper. It was severely lacking in resources and there was nothing listed in the internet; it was like the whole town was completely offline.

She'd managed to get a couple interviews at a bar and diner in town, but neither paid well enough for her to get a place of her own and she didn't want to overstay her welcome at Rose's. To hear Rose talk, Jess could stay forever but she feared that after a while that sentiment would change and she loved having Rose in her life too much to risk ruining the relationship.

The only waitressing job that she hadn't already called about was for a place called Cara Cara. All the ad said was they were hiring female waitresses aged 18-28, with a number listed at the bottom and a note to ask for Luann. Jess circled the ad and glanced up as Rose walked into the living room.

"Find anything yet?" Rose asked. Jess shrugged, passing her the newspaper to show Rose the ad.

"Cara Cara?" Rose asked, her eyebrows lifting and her eyes widening, "That's a strip club." Jess shrugged as Rose handed the newspaper back to her, chewing on the pen cap as she read over the ad one more time.

"Why don't you find a nice secretarial position?" Rose asked hopefully, "I'm sure I could call at the school and ask if they need anyone in the office." Jess shook her head.

"I don't really want to work in an office," Jess said.

"You'd rather work at a strip club?" Rose asked. Jess shrugged again.

"So long as I'm not the one getting naked," she responded, "Besides, it'll just be temporary. Something to get me on my feet. I can't sit around on my ass forever, as much as I'd like to." Rose sighed, obviously not thrilled with the idea, but she didn't push it. Jess grabbed her cell phone, double checking the number as she dialed and waited for it to ring.

"Cara Cara," a voice answered distractedly.

"Hi, can I speak to Luann please?" Jess asked.

"Speaking," the voice responded.

"Oh, hi," Jess said, "My name's Jessica Tyler. I was calling about the ad in the paper for a waitress position."

"Oh right. Yeah, can you come in at 3:00 for an interview?" Luann asked.

"3:00 today?" Jess asked in surprise, "Um yeah, I can do that."

"Great, see you then. Ask for me when you get here. Do you have the address?" Jess grabbed a pen and scrawled the address on it before thanking her and hanging up the phone. For some reason, she had a good feeling about this one.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Several hours later, Jess stood in front of her closet toiling over what to wear to the interview. She'd never interviewed at a strip club before and had no idea what Luann was looking for. She finally decided on a low cut top, jeans, and ballet flats and gave herself a once over in the mirror, somewhat satisfied with her appearance.

She left Rose's way too early for fear of being late, and wound up getting to the club about 20 minutes before 3:00. She stepped out of the car, taking in the sight of the large club in front of her. It was an impressive sight, far more impressive than any of the "gentlemen clubs" in Santa Barbara. The building was made of what looked like white stone with a large awning in front that covered a drop-off round about and held up by enormous stone pillars. Above the awning were two interlocked C's, one slightly raised above the other, and the words CARA CARA under them in a delicate script. What looked to be blue neon lights lined the roof and awning and Jess was sure it was an even more impressive sight lit up at night.

Not wanting to go in just yet, she reached in her purse for her pack of cigarettes and a lighter, groaning when she realized the lighter was dead. She glanced around and noticed a girl about her age leaning against the wall near the entrance, a large bag slung across her shoulder, smoking a cigarette with an extremely bored expression on her face. The girl looked over as she noticed Jess, her piercing blue eyes watching her as she walked up.

"Got a light?" Jess asked, raising the cigarette in her hand. The girl nodded, digging in her pocket before pulling out a lighter and handing it to her.

"Thanks," Jess said as she took it, lighting the cigarette and handing the lighter back.

"You don't look like our usual clientele," the girl commented, "So I'm guessing you're here about a job." Jess nodded.

"Guessed right," she said.

"Waitress or dancer?" the girl asked. Jess choked slightly on her cigarette before realizing it really wasn't a strange question, considering the establishment.

"Waitress," Jess responded, "I've been working in bars since I was 18." The girl nodded disinterestedly, the bored expression back on her face as she ran a hand through her dark brown hair, causing the streaks of blond highlights to catch in the sun. Jess suddenly felt self-conscious, as if she wasn't making a good impression. She didn't know why she cared about this girl's approval, but she did.

"Are, uh, are you a dancer?" Jess asked. The girl snorted, a grin breaking across her face as she shook her head.

"Luann wishes," she responded, "No, I'm the head waitress here. My dad's part owner. Nepotism at its finest." She finished her cigarette and threw it to the ground, stepping on it lightly as she made to walk through the front door. Before she reached it, she turned back to look at Jess appraisingly.

"You want some advice?" she asked. Jess nodded, raising her eyebrows in surprise at this girl's willingness to help her out. The girl dug through the large bag she was carrying, pulling out a pair of black pumps and handing them to Jess.

"Wear these instead of your flats," she said, "They'll make your ass look better." Jess stared at her for a second, taken aback, before taking the heels and quickly stepping into them.

"Thanks," she said. The girl shrugged and walked inside. Jess checked her watch and realized it was almost time for her interview. She stuffed her flats into her bag and fluffed her hair before she followed the girl through the front doors.

If the outside had impressed Jess, it was nothing to the inside. She walked in to see a large dark room, strategic lights shining blue columns onto the walls. Small tables, too many to count, surrounded by four arm chairs filled either side of the room at the very center of which was a round stage, a pole erected in the center and chairs surrounding it. A blond was currently swinging her way around the pole while several patrons threw dollar bills on the stage. The most impressive part of the room, however, was the wide staircase leading up from the stage to yet another stage, and then more stairs leading to a walkway that stretched the length of the back wall where several girls were dancing spaced evenly apart. Jess stared around the room for a moment before making her way to the bar which lined the left side of the room.

"Hi, I'm looking for Luann," she said when she'd caught the bartender's attention.

"You found her," a voice said from behind and Jess turned to see a woman standing behind her, gazing at her appraisingly. She looked to be in her early fifties, but still retained the beauty from her youth. Her dirty blond hair was full and long, hanging in loose curls well past her shoulders. Jess smiled nervously at her as Luann led her to a table close to the bar.

"You got a resume?" Luann asked as they sat down, waiting as Jess pulled a copy out of a folder in her bag and handed it across the table to Luann. She looked it up and down, nodding approvingly.

"I see you have a lot of waitressing experience, so that's a plus," she said, setting the resume down on the table, "Tell me a little about yourself."

"Well, I started waitressing when I was 18 at a bar in Santa Barbara. I have experience at several different types of bars and clubs," Jess said, her eyes darting around the room in hopes of inspiration. She hated talking about her personal history, but realized her work history was all written down on the piece of paper sitting in front of Luann.

"Mmmhmm," Luann said, her eyes once again dropping to the resume in front of her, "So why did you leave your last job?" Jess swallowed hard, trying to think of a good answer.

"I… I wanted a change," she said, "I decided to move up here to be closer to my Aunt." Luann nodded again, her face expressionless.

"Well I got to say, I'm impressed with the amount of waitressing experience you have," Luann said and Jess breathed a soft sigh of relief, "But I want to go over some things about how it works around here, just to make sure you're okay with it all and that you'll be a good fit." Jess nodded eagerly, looking attentively back at Luann.

"First things first, and this is important. I run a clean club here. You don't mess around with the customers on the clock. What you do on your own time is your business, but if it gets back to me you're hooking, you're done. No second chances with that. With me?" Luann asked seriously. Jess stared back at her before nodding.

"Got it," Jess said slowly.

"Good. Pay is 5 an hour, which is more than the state of California says I have to pay wait staff, plus tips. If you're good, flirt with the clients without giving too much away, you'll earn big. Our top waitresses are taking home several bills a night in tips. We're open every day but Sunday. You'll either work noon till eight or seven till two. Dress code is sexy: low cut tops, tight pants, short shorts and skirts and heels, on theme nights, you dress theme sexy. Work for you?" Luann asked. Jessica nodded again.

"Well I guess all there is left to do is to call your last job, verify employment," Luann said. Jess widened her eyes, gnawing slightly on her lip.

"Are you going to be asking them for a reference?" she asked hesitatingly. Luann looked at her with amusement.

"Why?" she asked. Jess sighed.

"Well, full disclosure, my last boss was also my ex, and after I quit I sort of poured a beer over his head," Jess said, knowing that she had most definitely just talked herself out of a job. That is until she heard a howl of laughter from behind them.

"Good God Luann, you've gotta hire her!" Jess turned around to see the girl from outside standing several feet away, leaning against a bar-height table and grinning broadly. Luann shook her head, but she was smiling.

"Well I guess you got yourself a job," Luann said, standing from the table and holding out her hand. Jess followed her lead, standing up and shaking her hand.

"Really? Thank you so much!" Jess said, relieved to start making some money, "When can I start?"

"Well one of our waitresses called in today – can you start now?" Luann asked, "I won't have a W4 for you but I can pay you under the table for today. You can come in tomorrow and fill out the paperwork."

"Yeah, sure!" Jess responded.

"Great, you'll follow Lux around today, help her out. She'll show you the ropes," Luann said, motioning to the girl, who walked over to them, still grinning at Jess.

"Lux Morrow, this is Jessica Tyler," Luann introduced.

"Jess, actually," Jess corrected, "I prefer Jess." Luann nodded.

"I want you to show her around today and try not to scare her off," she said to Lux. Lux rolled her eyes at Luann before turning to Jess, jerking her head in the direction of the bar and Jess followed her there.

"So I hear you've never worked at a strip club before," Lux said as they stood by the bar.

"Where'd you hear that?" Jess asked.

"Over there, when I was listening in on your interview," Lux responded unabashedly, "Anyway, there's not much you need to know. Most of the dancers are pretty cool, but some of the A-list girls are just cunts. They tend to think they're so much better than the waitresses when really we make almost as much money as them without showing our tits." Jess laughed, nodding.

"Hey Rob!" Lux called to the bartender, who glanced up and walked over to them, "Jess this is Rob, one of the bartenders." Rob grinned, nodding hello at Jess.

"The _best_ bartender, right Rob?" Lux asked, batting her eyelashes flirtatiously. Rob grinned, nodding.

"That's what they tell me," he said jokingly before Lux pulled Jess away.

"Step number 1 – get in good with the bartenders. They'll make your drinks a hell of a lot faster if they like you," Lux told her. Jess nodded, appreciating Lux more and more. Lux spent the next couple of hours taking Jess around and introducing her to some of the regulars before letting Jess take a few tables of her own. They were both kept pretty busy until their shift ended at 8:00.

"You wanna get a beer before you go home?" Lux asked Jess as she finished clearing her last table.

"Yeah, sure," Jess responded, following Lux to the bar and taking a seat. Rob handed them each a beer and Lux turned to Jess, looking curiously at her.

"So are you from Charming?" Lux asked, "I haven't seen you around before, but that's not saying much. I don't get out a whole lot." Jess shook her head, taking a sip of the beer. It felt so good to finally be off her feet.

"No, I'm actually from Santa Barbara. I just moved here a couple weeks ago," Jess explained. Lux gaped at her.

"Why the _hell_ would you move to Charming from Santa Barbara?" Lux asked.

"My aunt lives here, so I moved to be closer to her," Jess said. She really didn't like talking about herself all that much and was relieved when Lux didn't press for more details.

"Well you're crazy," Lux said, "Which means you'll probably fit in around here just fine." Jess laughed.

"So what's there to do for fun around here?" Jess asked. Lux shrugged.

"There's a couple bars, a few places to eat, a couple clothing stores, and a bowling alley," Lux rattled off, "In other words, not much. Mostly I just sit at home watching Toddlers and Tiaras." Jess laughed, grinning broadly.

"I love that show!" Jess said and Lux nodded, taking a sip of her beer.

"It's such a train wreck, isn't it?" she asked, grinning. Jess nodded.

"Yes, but not nearly as bad as Honey Boo Boo," she responded. Lux looked at her, her face one of all seriousness.

"Well of course not. You've got a pageant mom and extreme couponer, all in one. It's amazing," she said. Jess laughed.

"I take great comfort in knowing that no matter how bad my life is, I'm not one of those people," Jess said and Lux nodded.

"Don't we all," she agreed. Jess grinned, realizing that she was beginning to really like Lux and glad that she was able to find a friend in this new town so soon. Lux's grin faded as she looked past Jess, rolling her eyes exaggeratedly.

"Oh lord," she mumbled and Jess looked over her shoulder to see a stunningly pretty, and equally bitchy, looking blond walking briskly towards them, her hips swaying as she walked.

"Hey, Lux," the girl said, a smile plastered on her face.

"What do you want, Ima?" Lux asked.

"I just realized I left the outfit I was going to wear tonight at Jax's," she responded, as if this made her the Queen of Charming.

"And?" Lux asked, glancing over at Jess, "It's really not that impressive to get into my brother's pants." She turned back to look at Ima, "He's almost as big of a slut as you."

"I need that outfit," Ima told her, ignoring her comment, "I need you to go get it for me."

"Fuck off, Ima. Wear something else or get it yourself," Lux told her. Ima glared at Lux, her eyes narrowing.

"I'm going to go tell Luann I need it," she said, storming off. Lux sighed, looking back at Jess.

"I better go before Luann tries to guilt me into getting it for her," she said. Jess nodded.

"Yeah, I better get going, too. I never got a chance to tell my aunt I was staying to work the shift," Jess said, suddenly feeling guilty for not checking in. It was weird to suddenly have someone in your life that actually cared where you were all the time.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess walked into the house hoping to find the lights off and that Rose had gone to bed already, but she should've known better. She walked into the living room to see Rose lounging on the couch, reading a book. She glanced up when Jess walked in, sitting up and smiling.

"You could have called," she said, but her voice was full of humor, not anger. Jess grinned guiltily.

"I know, I'm sorry," Jess told her, "I'm just not used to having someone care about where I am." Rose frowned, her eyes filling briefly with sadness before she shook it off and smiled again.

"It's fine, baby," she said, "I was just worried because I didn't think you'd be gone that long for an interview. How'd it go?"

"Really good. I mean, I got the job. That's why I was late, they needed me to work the rest of the shift," she said.

"Good," Rose said, "I'm happy for you. But now I'm going to bed because I'm an old woman who can't keep these crazy hours." Jess grinned, rolling her eyes.

"You're not that old," Jess responded.

"Ah, you're sweet," Rose said, her eyes twinkling, "Night, love."

"Night," Jess said before collapsing on the couch, completely worn out from the days' events.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_**Thank you so much for reading! We really hope you all will enjoy this story. We plan on posting every Sunday and the next chapter will be Jess' first introduction to the Sons. Please review! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: Thank you so much to all of you who favorited/alerted/and reviewed! We were so blown away by the amount of alerts we got we decided to post this chapter a couple of days early. **

* * *

After three weeks of working at Cara Cara, if Jess had to describe it in one word that word would be insane. Music constantly pumping, drinks flowing, drunk patrons hollering, and topless girls dancing, but despite it all, Jess was really enjoying the job. There was certainly never a dull moment and her shifts passed much faster than the miserable hours she'd endured at Ethan's bar back in Santa Barbara. The money didn't hurt either – she was making more in one shift at Cara Cara than she had in a week at her old job. Rose had so far steadfastly refused any rent money, so for the first time in her life Jess actually had savings. She couldn't even describe what a great feeling that was.

At the end of her shift, Jess printed out her receipts and walked to Luann's office to do her tip out. Luann glanced up when she knocked on the door, smiling and motioning for her to come in. Jess handed over the money she owed to the bar and Luann stuffed it in an envelope sitting on her desk before looking back up at her.

"So how you doing, Jess?" Luann asked her, motioning to the chair on the other side of the desk as a cue that Jess should sit down.

"Doing good," Jess replied nervously as she took a seat, not really sure why Luann wanted to talk to her.

"Lux tells me you've been picking up on things really well," Luann told her and Jess smiled, breathing a sigh of relief.

"Lux has been a great trainer," Jess said.

"Well that's subjective, but I'm glad you two are getting along," Luann said, grinning, "I just wanted to tell you I've been really happy with your performance so far. I just wanted to make sure you're happy and see if you needed anything." Jess's smile widened. She couldn't recall a boss ever asking her if she was happy.

"I really like it here. Lux has been great, and the girls have been really welcoming. Well, for the most part," she added. Luann waved her hand in the air dismissively.

"Just ignore Ima. Even she knows she's a bitch," Luann told her and Jess laughed, "Well keep up the good work, Jess, and again, let me know if you need anything."

Jess thanked her and walked to the back of the club where the dressing rooms were to grab her purse. Lux was in there when she walked in, also getting ready to leave, and walked up to her.

"So you've been in Charming over a month now," Lux commented, "You must have seen the whole town by now. What do you think?"

"All I've done is go to work and go home," Jess replied, "I thought about going and getting a drink at one of the bars but I hate going by myself and my aunt isn't really the bar going type anymore."

"That's pathetic," Lux told her, "I'll go with you." Jess smiled in surprise.

"Yeah? That'd be great," she said. Lux smiled, nodding.

"Why don't we go now? I know you're not busy since you have no other friends," she said. Jess rolled her eyes, pulling her purse out of one of the lockers and shutting it.

"Sure, why not?" she responded.

"Excellent," Lux said happily, "I know a place – why don't you follow me there?"

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess pulled into a parking spot next to Lux in front of a very non-descript bar. A sign over the front door declared it to be The Hairy Dog. Lux joined her on the sidewalk, glancing up at the sign before looking back at Jess.

"I know it looks like a shit hole, but the drinks are cheap and the people are nice," she said shrugging, holding the door open for Jess. Jess walked through to see a small room. There was a square bar in the center and pool tables in the back with booths lining the walls and tables scattered throughout. Several people glanced up when they walked in, waving at Lux who waved back as she led Jess to the bar.

"Hey crazy," the bartender said as Lux stepped up, "Long time no see."

"Hey Sam," Lux responded, rolling her eyes at the nickname, "Get us a pitcher?"

"Sure thing," he said, filling one up and setting it on the bar in front of them. Lux tossed a few bills on the counter before picking up the pitcher and leading Jess, who grabbed a couple glasses, to a booth.

"So," Lux began as she filled up their glasses with the beer, "Why did you _really_ leave Santa Barbara?"

"What do you mean?" Jess asked, taking the glass and sipping on it.

"Come on," Lux said, "Trouble with the law? Crazy ex? Creepy stalker?" Jess shook her head.

"No to all of those. I just… hated my job," she replied. Lux frowned.

"That's boring," she said. Jess rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry I'm not as interesting as Honey Boo Boo," she said jokingly.

"Oh, well if that's the standard you're holding yourself up to," Lux said, "No one is more interesting than Honey Boo Boo." Jess laughed, enjoying how easy it was to feel comfortable around this girl she'd once found so intimidating.

"I need to start looking for an apartment," Jess commented, "You know any good ones around here?" Lux pursed her lips in thought.

"We don't really have many apartment buildings in Charming. The ones we do have are small and the nicer ones usually fill up pretty fast. But you could always get on the waiting list since you don't have to rush," Lux told her.

Jess nodded, but before she could respond, the front door flung open angrily and Lux's eyes widened as two tall men, one with blond hair to his shoulders, the other with long dark hair and a huge beard, stormed towards them, both looking angry.

"Fuuuuuuck," Lux whispered, biting her lip.

"What's wrong?" Jess asked, looking between Lux and the men.

"God damnit piece of shit stalker mother fucker," Lux was muttering, shrinking down slightly in her seat, her eyes not leaving the men walking towards them.

"What? Is one of those guys your boyfriend?" Jess asked, hoping she didn't say the blond who, even through his anger, was possibly the sexiest guy she'd ever seen. Or possibly because of his anger, Jess couldn't tell yet. Lux grimaced, shaking her head.

"No. It's my brother," she said. Jess looked back at the guys, who were closing in on their table, and sent up a quick prayer.

'_Dear God, please let Lux's brother be the giant and not the blond_,' she thought quickly, knowing that the desire to fuck your friend's brother wasn't exactly the greatest thing for a new friendship, and threw up an '_Amen_' just to be on the safe side as the guys stalked up to them.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Lux?" the blond asked as Jess looked away, trying not to get caught staring.

"What the fuck are _you _doing here?" Lux asked haughtily.

"Don't do that, Lux," he replied angrily, "Just tell me why the _hell_ you suddenly decided to come back here." Lux stared back him, clearly trying to figure out how he even knew she was there before her eyes flicked past him to Sam, the bartender, who was standing behind the bar looking guilty.

"God DAMNIT SAM!" Lux bellowed before turning her attention back to the blond, "I was just having a drink with a friend."

"You don't have any friends," the blond replied before turning to look at Jess, his eyes narrowed and, Jess thought, slightly smoldering, "Who the fuck are you?"

"That's exactly why I don't have any friends!" Lux yelled at him, turning to look at the giant standing silently beside the blond, "Opie, can you please put a leash on him?" Opie gave her a small grin and a wink, seeming very amused by the whole thing and causing Lux to roll her eyes and turn back to the blond, "Don't you have some pussy you need to be face down in?"

"You know I don't like you coming here," he said.

"Yeah, last time I checked, you were my_ brother_, Jax, not my dad," Lux grumbled. Jess sighed at the confirmation that the blond, Jax, was indeed her brother.

"Yeah, and you know your dad doesn't like you coming here, either," Jax responded. Lux sat there staring back at him, pausing as she tried to think of a comeback.

"Last time I checked, I was an adult," Lux said, trying to find the calm in her voice, "We were just having a drink. Me being here doesn't have anything to do with…. anything else." Jess frowned, wondering what the 'anything else' was that the guys seemed so determined to keep her away from.

"We're just having a drink," Lux said, turning back to look at Jess, "Right, Jess?" Jess looked wide-eyed back at her, still trying to figure out what the hell was going on, before she finally realized they were waiting on her to respond.

"Yeah, we were just having a drink," Jess confirmed, "I wanted to go out and don't know anyone else. Lux was just being nice… I didn't know we were doing anything wrong-"

"We're NOT doing anything wrong," Lux said, cutting her off. Jax was still clearly annoyed, but before he could say anything Opie put his hand on Jax's shoulder.

"Let's go get a beer," he said, "Everything's cool." Jax sighed, glaring once more at Lux, before he and Opie walked away, taking a seat at the bar and getting a beer. Jax turned in his seat, his back against the bar, clearly keeping an eye on Lux and Jess.

"So that was my brother," Lux said, turning back to Jess, "And my keeper…. And his keeper." Jess nodded, still shocked at their outburst, and they both finished the rest of their beer in silence. As Lux picked up the pitcher to refill their glasses, Jess finally worked up the courage to ask her.

"So… what was that…?" she asked lamely, her sentence trailing off. Lux waved her hand dismissively as she set the pitcher back on the table.

"It's nothing," she said, "I got in some trouble a few years ago and they think this place had something to do with it… like if I come back it's just going to start all over again or something so they don't like me coming here but," she raised her voice, yelling over the bar loud enough for Jax to hear, "That's in the past and I can have a beer wherever I want to!"

Jax rolled his eyes at her as Lux turned back to Jess, expecting her to ask more questions. She was relieved when Jess nodded satisfactorily and Lux smiled, happy to have found a friend that knew when not to pry.

"So what are the Sons of Anarchy?" Jess asked, glancing over at Jax and Opie and reading the words off the back of the vest they wore. Lux stared back at her for several seconds before shaking her head.

"I keep forgetting you're not from around here," she said, "It's a club my dad helped start way back a million ago where a bunch of guys sit around and circle jerk talking about motorcycles and reapers… and motorcycles with reapers… and sluts with motorcycle fetishes." Jess laughed as Sam walked up, setting a fresh pitcher on their table.

"On the house," he said apologetically. Lux glared at him.

"I'm still made at you," she said. Jess started handing over a couple dollars for a tip and Lux snatched it out of her hand, setting it back on the table in front of Jess.

"Don't you tip him," she said, "I'm sure my brother already did that." Sam shrugged again, assenting to the accusation, before walking back to the bar. Lux rolled her eyes at his retreating back.

"I gotta pee, I'll be right back," she said, sliding out of the booth. She paused by Jax on her way to the bathroom.

"Hey," she said as she stepped up to her brother, her anger subsided.

"Hey," Jax replied.

"Look, I'm sorry about coming here without telling you," Lux said, "But I swear, I just came to get a drink with Jess." Jax nodded.

"I know, Lux," he said, "I just hear that you're at The Hairy Dog and I worry about what you're doing here."

"I know, but all that really is behind me. You don't need to worry so much," Lux told him, "And Jess is the only girl at work I can even stand and I really want to be friends with her so will you please apologize for yelling at her because I'm pretty sure she's freaked out enough that she's gonna run away as soon as I'm in the bathroom." Jax stared at her for a beat before rolling his eyes to the ceiling and nodded.

"Sure," he finally said, "For you." Lux beamed, throwing her arms around his shoulders.

"Thanks," she said, walking off towards the bathroom. Jax shoved himself off the bar as Opie followed. He swaggered up to Jess, whose eyes widened partly in lust and partly in fear as she watched him walk up to her.

"Sorry about earlier," he said as he stopped in front her table, "Yelling at you like that." Jess shrugged, smiling flirtatiously up at him.

"It's okay," she responded, "I didn't mean to get her in trouble with you."

"She got herself in trouble," Jax replied, "It's not your fault." Jess shrugged.

"I'm Jax, by the way," he told her, finally taking a second to look at the girl now that he wasn't blindly seeing red. He grinned, liking what he was seeing.

"I'm Jess," she replied, openly staring at him.

"I'm Opie, if anyone gives a shit," Opie declared from behind Jax. Jess blushed, smiling at them as they walked back over to the bar.

"I know that look," Opie told him as they took their seats once again.

"What look?" Jax asked, playing dumb.

"You know what look. I really don't think it's a good idea for you to fuck Lux's only friend," Opie told him. Jax shrugged, glancing back at Jess, his eyes raking over her.

"Lux'll make new friends," he replied. Opie rolled his eyes.

"No she won't," he told him, "When has she ever had a friend?"

"That one girl," Jax said, "That one with the pigtails."

"That was in the third grade," Opie reminded him.

"Oh yeah," Jax replied, "Whatever happened to her?"

"You probably fucked her," Opie grumbled. Jax shrugged in agreement. He couldn't deny his reputation was entirely deserved.

* * *

**Author's Note: Please please review! It really helps us know if we're going in the right direction so please review! The next chapter will be posted on Sunday, and every Sunday after that :) **


	3. Chapter 3

Jess walked into the kitchen at Rose's, the aroma of her cooking wafting through the entire house. She kissed Rose on the cheek before looking down at the stove in front of her as she leaned against the counter.

"Geez Rose, I don't eat that much," Jess joked, looking down at the half dozen pots and pans Rose had going. Rose smiled at her.

"Well I'm not used to cooking for two. I didn't really know how much to make," she responded. Jess bit her lip, her insecurities making her wonder if this was her aunt hinting that it's about time Jess found her own place.

"I'm gonna start looking for apartments on my next day off," Jess said in case Rose needed reassurances, "It's just taking longer than I expected." Rose frowned, looking back at her.

"No, that's not what I meant, baby girl," she said, "I love cooking for two, and you better still come over for dinner even after getting this apartment you're so determined to get." Jess smiled at her, slightly relieved, as she helped Rose load two plates full of food and walked it over to the table.

"So, have you heard from Daisy at all?" Jess asked hesitatingly as she ran her fork distractedly through her mashed potatoes. Rose shook her head, looking questioningly at Jess.

"Not since the last time you did," she responded. Jess frowned, staring down at her plate.

"I feel really guilty about that," Jess admitted, "About what I said to her."

"Why? It was all true," Rose told her firmly.

"Yeah, well I didn't think it would make her drop off the face of the earth for three years," Jess replied.

"My sister made her choices and they were bad ones," Rose told her, "There's no reason you should have grown up in foster care and I'm not sure I'll ever forgive her for that. She made her bed, she can lie in it for a while."

"Well Daisy thought I was going to grow up with a family," Jess reminded her, "She didn't know they would… you know…die." Rose frowned, shaking her head.

"_We're _your family, Jess," she told her, "_I'm _your family. You should never have been given to strangers in the first place. I would have taken you if Daisy couldn't be a mother. She knew that. That's why she kept you this big secret."

Jess shrugged, nodding to appease her aunt. She didn't like to think about it much – mourning the life she could have had with her aunt instead of in the system never did her any good.

"Well, have you made any friends since you been here?" Rose asked in a brazenly obvious ploy to change the subject. Jess nodded, welcoming the change.

"I've gone out for drinks a couple times with a girl I work with, Lux Morrow," Jess said, "I really like her. And there's some girls at work that I get along with pretty well." Rose smiled, nodding.

"Good," Rose replied, "That's good. You need to get out more. Young, pretty girl like you – shame to keep you hidden away here all the time." Jess smiled.

"Well I'm definitely happier here than I ever was in Santa Barbara," Jess told her. Rose smiled, nodding.

"Well I'm glad you're happy," she said, "You coulda been this happy 8 years ago if you'd just come to Charming when I first asked you to," she added teasingly. Jess grinned.

"Yes, you were right," Jess said, rolling her eyes.

"Ah yes, my favorite words," Rose replied grinning, "You were right."

SOASOASOASOASOA

Saturday nights were always Cara Cara's busiest and Jess was running late. She flew through the front doors, rushing to the back to put her purse up and get her section assignment. She quickly scanned the list, but after going over it several times she was sure her name wasn't on it. Frowning, she double checked the schedule to make sure she was supposed to work tonight, before shrugging at the mistake and heading towards Luann's office to figure out where she wanted her.

"Jess, I've been looking everywhere for you!" Luann called as she ran up to her. Jess nodded apologetically.

"I know, I'm sorry I'm late," she said. Luann shook her head dismissively.

"Oh don't worry about it. I've got a special job for you tonight," she told her, causing Jess to raise her eyebrows in surprise. When the owner of a strip club tells you she's got a special job, it tends to induce a slight panic attack.

"The Sons are coming in tonight," Luann said, "I need you to work the table. You're the best waitress we've got tonight." Jess was relieved that was all it was but still hesitated. She didn't really want to spend her night working only one table but she also didn't want to argue with Luann who, so far, had been nothing but amazing towards her.

"Trust me," Luann said, picking up on Jess's hesitation, "You will make more money working that one table than you would an entire section and, besides, they requested you."

"What? Why me?" she asked quickly.

"Well Lux requested you on their behalf," Luann corrected and Jess frowned.

"Why doesn't Lux just wait on them?" Jess asked, hoping the question came across as confusion and not insubordination.

"Lux tries not to work on nights they come in. Her dad and brother think it's weird to be here when she's working, even if she's not a dancer," Luann explained. Jess finally nodded, feeling the butterflies form at confirmation that Jax would be a part of the party.

"Okay, then," she finally said, walking towards the table as she waited for the Sons to get there.

It was hard not to notice them walk in – a herd of burley looking men, all wearing the same leather vest. She noticed people in the club walking up to greet them as if royalty had just walked in.

"Or the mob," Jess said out loud, finding it strange for people to react like that towards a club. Hadn't Lux told her that all they do is sit around and talk about motorcycles? The group finally made their way to the table and sat down as Jess took a deep breath, preparing to walk over to them. She suddenly found them extremely intimidating. She shook it off, reminding herself she was just their waitress and they were just a table. She'd been doing this for 8 years. It was nothing different.

"Hi, I'm Jess," she told them as she approached their table and they all turned to look at her. She felt her face flush and tried as hard as she could not to make eye contact with Jax, knowing if she did she would stutter over every word she was about to say.

"So what can I get you guys to drink?" she asked, starting with an older man leaning back in his chair, puffing on a cigar. He had the exact same eyes as Lux and Jess knew right away this had to be her father, Clay.

"Just a whiskey," he said. Jess nodded, going around the table, beaming shyly despite herself when she got to Jax. He ordered a beer, giving her a wink and she looked away quickly, afraid of making a complete fool of herself. She turned to the next guy at the table – a younger guy with a mohawk and tattoos on either side of his head. He glared at her pensively, stroking his chin.

"A'ight, I want a whiskey," he said. Jess nodded, about to turn to the next person when it seemed that he wasn't finished, "And I want a little tequila mixed in. With some grenadine. And lemon juice. And a splash of V8." Jess stared at him, tilting her head.

"Are… are you sure?" she asked, knowing that combination would be terrible. Rob the bartender was going to kill her. The mohawk nodded.

"Yeah, and throw a cherry on it," he said. Jess raised her eyebrows but shrugged, pulling a note pad from her back pocket to jot his requests down before turning to the next son. He seemed to be slightly younger than The Mohawk, but was the largest at the table.

"I'll get a shot of tequila," he said, "And two Budweisers. And a guiness. 4 shots of vodka. And…. A frozen margarita." Jess raised her eyebrows, writing it down.

"You know I will be back," she said jokingly, grinning at him, but he just stared stonily back at her.

"I want it all now," he replied. She bit her lip, nodding as she turned to the next.

"Alright I want a Black and Tan. But instead of the ale, I want whiskey," the next guy said in a strong Scottish accent. There were several snickers from around the table and Jess stared at him for several moments, trying to figure out if he was joking or if maybe she had misheard due to his accent.

"You want a Black and Tan _and_ a whiskey?" Jess asked hopefully, but The Scot shook his head.

"No, I want the Black and Tan _made_ with whiskey," he said.

"I'm pretty sure whiskey won't layer the right way…" Jess said, her voice trailing off.

"Did I ask your opinion!?" he shouted at her. Jess shook her head, her eyes widening as she took a step back.

"Nope, okay. One guiness and a whiskey then," Jess mumbled, scrawling it on the pad, sighing as she looked at the last guy at the table – this one older with dark curly hair and mischievous blue eyes. He glanced up at her.

"Alright, I want an ice cold Budweiser," he said and Jess sighed with relief at the simple order, scrawling it down, "BUT," he continued and Jess stared back at him, wondering what weird request he could possibly have for her, "I want it in a hot glass." Jess raised her eyebrows but wrote it down.

"Oookay," she muttered, hurrying off to bring the orders to the bar. Rob the bartender glanced down at the ticket she handed over, shaking his head.

"You've got to be shitting me," he said, "There's seriously a person out there who wants whiskey with tequila, grenadine, lemon juice, and V8?" Jess nodded, shrugging.

"And don't forget the cherry," she said as she stepped behind the bar to warm a glass up for the curly haired Son.

Rob begrudgingly made the drinks and Jess took out a Budweiser, slowly pouring it into the hot glass and grimacing as she knew it was warming up the beer. She sighed, picking up the tray with all of their drinks and brought it carefully over to the table. She set them all down in front of them, waiting to see if they needed anything else.

The Mohawk took one sip of his drink before spitting it back into the glass, staring back at her.

"This is disgusting!" he yelled, holding the glass out to her. '_Yeah, of course it is,'_ Jess thought to herself, struggling not to roll her eyes as she took the glass back, attempting to look apologetic.

"Yeah, and I ordered 4 Budweisers and 2 vodka shots," the larger one next to The Mohawk said, "And you brought me 2 Buds and 4 vodkas."

"Sorry about that," Jess said, knowing he was wrong, "I'll get you two more Buds. You can keep the vodkas on the house."

"My beer's hot," the curly haired Son said but before Jess could respond, the Scot spoke up.

"And this is not a Black and Tan," he said, pushing the glass towards hers. This time, Jess couldn't help but roll her eyes.

"Yes, your beer's hot because it's in a hot glass," she said to Curly before turning to The Scot, "And that's not a Black and Tan because you ordered a Guiness and Whiskey!" All 4 of them broke out laughing, obviously not being able to keep up the charade anymore, as The Mohawk shot her a grin, shrugging.

"We were just fucking with you," he said and Jess couldn't help smiling back at his goofy grin, her shoulders sagging as the tension left them.

"Well thank God for that," Jess responded, causing them all to laugh once more. They each ordered a beer and Jess, shaking her head, walked off to grab it.

"Behave, boys," she said as she set their beers on the table in front of them. Curly grinned at her, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

"I've been bad," he said, "You might have to spank me." Jess smiled.

"Oh, don't tempt me," she said. The Scot grinned, shaking his head.

"Jesus, Tig, stop before you scar the girl for life," he said jokingly.

Jess finally chanced a glance across the table at Jax, who she had been trying to ignore for fear of melting, and found him staring back at her. Well, at her tits, but it was close enough. She smiled at him and he beckoned her over with his fingers. She felt her heart stop momentarily in her chest as she walked around the table towards him and he pulled her on his lap. She laughed, slinging an arm around his shoulder to keep her balance.

"I was lonely," he said, smirking at her. She grinned, licking her lips subconsciously as she looked down at him.

"Well I'm very sorry about that," she said, "But I do have to work." He shook his head, running his hand along her waist, causing goose bumps to run all over her body.

"You are working," he told her, "Keeping me company is part of the job." She laughed nervously, shaking her head.

"I don't know, Luann might disagree with you there if she saw me," she told him.

"Well you know, the Sons own part of the club, so technically, I'm your boss," Jax told her, winking and causing Jess's heart to beat a little faster.

"Well in that case," she said, "I shouldn't be in such a compromising position with my boss." He grinned.

"Nah, we encourage that kind of behavior around here," he said lowly in her ear. Jess briefly thought she might throw herself at him right then and there until Lux's dad, sitting next to them, turned to Jess.

"I need another whiskey," he said and Jess immediately hopped off of Jax's lap, running off to get his order, relieved to be given an out because she did not have enough willpower to get off his lap herself.

Jax turned to look at Clay, glaring.

"Just because Gemma'd have your balls if you got any pussy around here doesn't mean I can't," he growled. Clay shrugged.

"I'm not keeping you," he replied and Jax rolled his eyes.

Lux bounded up to Jess as she set the glass down in front of Clay, smiling broadly at her. Jess turned to look at her in surprise, thanking God she hadn't come in two minutes prior when Jess had been making herself cozy on her brother's lap.

"I thought you weren't working tonight," Jess said. Lux shook her head.

"No I'm not. I just came up to have a drink with you," she replied. Jess glanced back at the table.

"I'm working," she reminded her. Lux rolled her eyes, grabbing her hand and turning to her dad.

"Jess is going to have a drink with me so don't bother her for a while," she said. Clay raised his eyebrows.

"Yes, ma'am," he said sarcastically and Lux grinned. Jess shook her head, wondering what it must have been like for Lux, growing up around guys like this.

"So how's it going?" Lux asked as they took a seat at the bar as Rob the bartender set down a couple of beers for them.

"It's fine," she said honestly, "A few of them gave me ridiculous orders to screw with me, but I caught on. Eventually." Lux rolled her eyes.

"Lame," she said, "That's the best they could come up with?" Jess laughed.

"What, did you put 'em up to it?" she asked. Lux shrugged.

"I mighta told 'em to fuck with you. And they failed," she said, looking up at the stage where Ima and another girl were doing a double set, "I should've known they wouldn't be able to come up with any good ideas with tits flying around." Jess laughed.

"That must be it," she replied.

"They been behaving other than that?" Lux asked. Jess nodded.

"Sure," she said, glancing back at the table, "It doesn't hurt that some of them are really hot."

"Getting a little hot and bothered there?" Lux asked, grinning as she wagged her eyebrows suggestively. Jess laughed, shrugging noncommittally.

"So which one is it?" Lux asked, leaning forward excitedly. Jess laughed nervously, not really wanting to tell her that all she wanted to do was rip her brother's clothes off. She and Lux weren't quite there yet, so she just shrugged again. Lux rolled her eyes.

"Come on, which one?" Lux said, "As long as it's not Tig," she added quickly, "Because…. He's freaky." Jess raised her eyebrows.

"Really?" she said doubtfully, "Tig's the only one you'd have a problem with?" Lux shrugged.

"Well, not my dad obviously, because Gemma would end you," Lux said, "and not Piney because… ew. And he's not even here. And not Bobby. Unless, you know, that's your thing. Then more power to you. And him, for that matter." Jess laughed, a little more than slightly relieved that Jax wasn't on that list.

"I can talk to him for you if you want," Lux said.

"Talk to who?" Jess asked quickly, afraid she'd said something she was thinking about Jax out loud.

"Whichever one you want," Lux responded. Jess laughed.

"Well thanks, but I really don't need you pimping me out," she responded.

"Well technically," Lux said, her face stone straight, "I'd be pimping them out… Them's my hoes." Jess burst out laughing and Lux's face broke into a grin.

"You know I'm not going to stop asking until you tell me," Lux said as Jess glanced back at the Sons' table, inadvertently catching Jax's eye. He grinned a complete panty-dropping grin at her and she blushed, turning back to Lux, who looked back and forth between the two.

"Oh my God, it's Jax isn't it?" she asked, "I should've known. Everyone wants my brother. I just don't see it, but that might come from growing up watching him try to light his farts on fire." Jess crinkled her nose in disgust.

"Come to think of it, that was last week," Lux added and Jess laughed, shaking her head.

"Would that… you know… would it bother you?" Jess asked nervously. Lux shook her head.

"Nah, I don't care what he does, s'long as it's not Ima," Lux said, "And just so long as you know he's mostly a 'hit it and quit it' type guy. Don't go getting any romantic fantasies going on." Jess laughed.

"Trust me, my fantasies about him are not even slightly romantic," Jess said and Lux laughed.

"Okay, good. Well I better get going. We should get together tomorrow since we're both off," Lux said. Jess nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, just give me a call," she told her. She watched Lux walk away before heading back to the Son's table, where Jax promptly pulled her onto his lap again.

"Miss me?" he asked, smirking that same cocky, sexy smirk. Jess grinned, nodding.

'_Jessica Tyler_,' she thought to herself, '_You are so fucked. There's no possible way you could turn this one down_.'

* * *

**_Author's Note: _Thank you so so much to all who reviewed our last chapter! We really appreciate hearing what you guys think and it really makes us smile :)**

**We've decided that on top of posting our chapter every Sunday (which we will continue to do no matter what), We'll also post an additional chapter on Wednesday if we get a good response! We don't have any kind of set numbers of reviews/alerts in our mind, but it really motivates us to write more when we hear that people are liking the story, thus giving us more material that makes us feel comfortable posting more often and still have chapters backed up to make sure we can post regularly.**

**We of course always like constructive feedback as well, as it helps make our writing better! So just let us know what you thought! We really enjoy hearing what you think :)**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's Note: **_**We are so thankful to all of you who reviews and alerted this story! It really means a lot to us to hear what you guys think, so thank you! We're posting this chapter early, like we said we would! **

* * *

Jess woke sleepily the next morning, her eyes wincing from the morning sun streaming through the window. It took her half a minute to fully wake up and realize an arm that was not her own was draped across her stomach. Her eyes widened as the previous night's events flew back to her and she glanced over to see a fully naked Jax lying next to her, sleeping soundly. She bit her lip, carefully moving his arm so as not to wake him up and slid out of bed, quickly pulling on her clothes from the night before that had been thrown all over his bedroom.

"Bye," Jax mumbled sleepily when he heard her open the door and Jess smirked, shaking her head as she quietly closed the door behind her. She walked into the living room just as the front door opened and two women, one brunette that looked to be just a few years older than Jess with a toddler perched on her hip and the other the spitting image of Lux with 20 years on her, walked through the door. Jess froze, looking at them as if she was the deer and they were the headlights.

"I'm… gonna go feed Abel," the woman holding the toddler said, looking questioningly at Jess as she walked past her and into the kitchen. Jess had never before felt mortification like this. She'd been hoping for a clean getaway; no one likes the walk of shame.

"So you must be Jess," the older woman said, her arms crossed as she studied her, "Lux told me I might see you today."

"Well…she didn't tell me I'd be seeing you," Jess said.

"Lux loves her little surprises," she said, shrugging. Jess nodded, standing there in awkward silence as she searched for something to say.

"So you must be Mrs. Morrow," Jess finally said.

"Oh don't call me that. Call me Gemma," she responded.

"Um, yes ma'am," Jess replied. Gemma narrowed her eyes, glaring at her, and Jess had the feeling that if she held that look long enough, it might actually kill her.

"Well I was just…" Jess began.

"Leaving?" Gemma offered. Jess nodded, darting past Gemma and out the door. Realizing she left her car at Cara Cara, she sighed, resigned to walking home.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess was suddenly thankful that Charming was such a small town. She figured it wouldn't take more than an hour to walk the entire length of the town so it wasn't long before she got back to Rose's. As soon as she walked through the front door she made a beeline for the bathroom and quickly jumped in the shower. After allowing several minutes to stand under the hot water, she hastily washed before turning the water off and walking back into her room. She crawled back into bed, knowing she needed a few more hours of sleep.

She didn't wake until something large bounced on her. She sat up quickly in shock before she realized she was staring into the glinting eyes of Lux.

"Morning, slut," Lux said, a wide grin on her face. Jess groaned, covering her face with her hands.

"I'm sorry," she moaned. Lux laughed.

"Like I give a shit," she said, "Get up, let's go shopping." Jess put her hands down and nodded, relieved that Lux wasn't angry.

"Okay, gimme a minute to get ready," she said, "I won't take long; I already showered." Lux smirked.

"To wash away the shame?" she said jokingly. Jess groaned again.

"I'm sorry!" she said.

"I'm fucking with you," Lux said, "I really don't care. Now come on, get up! Shopping!" Jess nodded as she crawled out of bed and started getting ready.

Half an hour later, they were in Lux's black BMW on the way to Lodi, the next town over which offered many more shopping choices than Charming.

"So how pissed was Ima when you and Jax went home together?" Lux asked gleefully as she drove.

"I don't think she saw us leave. She was with a customer," Jess told her. Lux's face fell.

"Fuck," she said, "Well, you'll just have to do it again and this time, make sure to tell her you're going home with Jax."

"I don't think I'm going to do it again," Jess told her.

"What? Why? Did he suck?" Lux asked.

"No! It was gr-" Jess started to respond before pausing, shaking her head, "I'm not gonna talk about this with you. It's awkward."

"It's only awkward if you make it awkward. I don't really have that thing called 'boundaries'," Lux said.

"Yeah, I hadn't noticed," Jess muttered, "By the way, thanks for the heads up that your mom and that other chick were gonna be there." Lux laughed, grinning over at Jess.

"You called my mom Mrs. Morrow AND ma'am," she said, "Those are two big no no's." Jess shook her head, not wanting to relive the humiliation of the morning.

"Who was the other woman and the baby?" Jess asked, wondering if she really wanted to know the answer.

"The baby is my darling, wonderful nephew Abel," Lux said, "The woman is Jax's ex, the bitch. _Tara_. She's the closest thing Abel has to a mom, though, so Jax lets her spend time with him. Personally, I think he does it just for the free babysitting. Gemma says she wants to get back together with Jax, but she's broken his heart so many times I don't really see that happening." Lux was beginning to rant, and Jess realized she was getting on a roll, "I mean really the bitch just needs to leave Charming and let Jax move on with his life but will she? Of course not. She's gonna stick around, constantly trying to weasel her way back into Jax's life."

"Do you think he'll take her back?" Jess asked, wondering how a person's life could get to be so complicated in such a small town. Wasn't everything supposed to be simpler? Move slower?

"Not if he's smart," Lux said, "He just needs to find someone else. I keep telling him that but he says they just had a connection that he hasn't had with anyone else and I tell him just because he hasn't made that connection with someone else doesn't mean he won't. But… he's a stubborn asshole who never listens to me."

"Why don't you like Tara?" Jess asked. Lux sighed.

"Because I feel like every time I see her, I'm staring at her retreating back while my brother's heart shatters into a million pieces. Every time things get tough, little Tara packs her bags and bails. It's been her m.o. since she was 19," Lux explained with frustration. Jess nodded, staring out the window as they pulled into the parking lot of the only mall in Lodi.

She had been right. Last night had been fun, _really_ fun, but it couldn't happen again. She did not need to be getting involved with a guy who had so many complications going on.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Several hours later, both of them weighed down by shopping bags, Lux and Jess finally walked out of the mall and headed towards Lux's car. Lux halted suddenly halfway across the parking lot, tilting her head thoughtfully as she stared towards her car. Jess followed her gaze to see a group of Hispanics wearing the same type of vest as the Sons leaning against Lux's car, but Jess could tell these were definitely not Sons.

"Do you know them?" Jess asked, glancing over at Lux who was still staring thoughtfully at the group of men.

"Yeah. They're Mayans. I'm just trying to remember if they're friends or enemies," Lux said. Jess raised her eyebrows, beginning to get scared.

"Shouldn't that be something you keep track of?" Jess asked. Lux shrugs.

"It changes too often and nobody tells me shit," she said.

"Jesus Christ," Jess muttered, "What kind of club has enemies?"

"A successful one," Lux replied, confusing Jess even further. Lux apparently decided to risk it and walked up to the men, holding her head confidently high.

"Hey Alvarez," she said, greeting what looked to be the leader, judging by the president patch on his vest.

"Lux," he responded, "My old lady said she saw you in the mall."

"And she didn't even say hi," Lux said, "Rude."

"I have a package for Clay," he said, ignoring her comment and holding out a large, stuffed manila envelope, "This saves me a trip to Charming." Lux took the envelope.

"Fine, you can go now," she said, waving them away from her car. Alvarez grinned and nodded, motioning to the others to head back to their bikes and Jess and Lux threw their shopping bags into the back and climbed into the car. They drove in silence almost half the way to Charming before Jess turned to Lux.

"So what's in the package?" Jess asked.

"I told you, they don't tell me shit," Lux replied.

"Don't you want to know?" Jess asked. Lux shrugged.

"Not really. I'm more concerned with how pissed my dad is going to be when he finds out I went to Lodi without a patch," she said.

"What's wrong with going to Lodi?" Jess asked, full of questions.

"My dad is just way overprotective," Lux said, sighing deeply.

"So who were those guys?" Jess asked, "Really?" Lux sighed again, glancing quickly at Jess before returning her eyes to the road.

"Just another motorcycle club like the Sons," she replied, "They're called the Mayans. My dad's… done some work for them… you know, mechanic stuff or whatever. And… uh… sometimes it doesn't go well and they get mad at each other."

"They get mad at each other?" Jess repeated, "But you said they were either friends or enemies."

"Yeah… I guess enemies was kind of a strong word," Lux said.

"Kind of!" Jess exclaimed, sighing with relief, "I was picturing big biker gun shoot outs or something." Lux laughed nervously.

"Whaaaat?!" she asked, a little too surprised-sounding, "No… you watch too much TV." Finally, in an attempt to change the subject, Lux asked, "So, have you found an apartment yet?" Jess sighed, shaking her head.

"All the one bedrooms have a waiting list a mile long," Jess said, "I'll probably have to start looking outside of Charming."

"What? No way. You can't live outside of Charming; that's too far," Lux said.

"Well I can't live with my aunt forever," Jess told her.

"Then move in with me," Lux said quickly. Jess gave her a questioning look, her eyebrows raised. Lux finally took her eyes off the road and glanced at Jess.

"What?" Lux asked.

"You don't really seem like the type to want a roommate," Jess told her.

"I'd rather have you as a roommate than have you in Lodi or something," Lux told her. Jess pursed her lips in contemplation.

"I really wouldn't want to impose like that," Jess said. Lux shook her head.

"I have two bedrooms, it's not imposing," she said, "It's filling the space." Jess thought it over.

"Well how much do you want in rent?" Jess asked. Lux shrugged.

"How much do you want to pay?" she asked.

"Half," Jess responded.

"How much is half of zero?" Lux asked. Jess raised her eyebrows.

"What, you don't pay rent?" she asked. Lux shook her head.

"My dad owns the building. I just pay utilities," she explained.

"Then why the hell do you work so much?" Jess asked, flabbergasted.

"Because," Lux said, "Shoes." Jess laughed.

"Okay, how about I pay all the utilities and buy all the groceries?" she asked. Lux nodded.

"Cool," she said, "Now I can buy more shoes." Jess laughed again, smiling broadly as the pulled into the Teller-Morrow Automotive parking lot. She wasn't sure how Lux would be as a roommate but she knew one thing for certain – things would never be dull. And she couldn't exactly beat the rent.

Lux parked the car close to the entrance and turned to Jess.

"I've just gotta drop off this package and then I'll show you the apartment," she said. Jess nodded.

"Okay, I'll wait for you in the car," she said. Lux pouted, sticking her lower lip out and looking at Jess with sad puppy dog eyes.

"Please come with me," she said.

"Why?" Jess asked.

"Because maybe my dad won't yell at me as much if you're there," Lux told her.

"Yeah, I doubt that," Jess said, "Jax had no problem yelling at me at the Hairy Dog." Lux grinned.

"Yes, and look how well that turned out," she said. Jess rolled her eyes, opening her door and stepping out of the car.

"Fine, but if he starts yelling, I'm running away," she said as she followed Lux up to the front door and they walked into the clubhouse. Jess looked around. She'd had yet to walk into the SAMCRO clubhouse and it was not nearly as impressive as she'd thought. A bar in one corner, ratty couches against one wall, tables scattered throughout, and a stripper pole off to the left. Clay was standing near large double doors, talking to Tig as they walked up.

"Hey Lux," Clay said, smiling as he saw his daughter walking up. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close to him, "How you doing?"

"Great!" Lux said with bravado, gingerly fingering the package in her hand, "Jess and I had a great day. We went shopping and I got the cutest shoes and Jess got a super hot new dress and I got awesome new jeans and we had lunch and Alvarez gave me this package to give to you and I also got this really cute new halter and it was on sale so I got two in different colors and-"

"Stop!" Clay bellowed, holding the package Lux had thrust into his hands in the middle of her babbling.

"I'm leaving!" Jess said quickly, rushing towards the door.

"Chicken!" Lux called after her, but Jess didn't stop. She ran outside, taking a seat on one of the picnic tables outside and took out a cigarette, searching for a working lighter and groaning when she couldn't find one. Why did she never have a lighter that worked? She sighed, glancing up to see Jax walk out of one of the bays across the lot, walking towards her.

"Hey, darlin'," he drawled and Jess grinned as he grabbed a lighter out of his pocket, lighting her cigarette for her.

"What you doin' here?" he asked, taking a seat next to her and lighting a cigarette for himself.

"Lux was going to show me her apartment because I might move in with her, but this Alvarez guy gave her a package while we were in Lodi so she stopped by to give it to him," Jess explained. Jax raised his eyebrows in amusement.

"Lux was in Lodi?" he asked, "Is Clay pissed?"

"That would be why I am out here," Jess told him, "Your family yells a lot." Jax grinned.

"That's how we show we love each other," he said.

"You could just say you love each other," Jess pointed out. Jax grinned, shaking his head as he took a drag of his cigarette.

"So why can't Lux go to Lodi?" Jess asked.

"Clay doesn't like her leaving Charming without a patch. He doesn't think it's safe," Jax said, shrugging.

"Should I not leave Charming?" Jess asked, wondering what this mysterious danger was. Jax shook his head.

"Nah you can leave," he said, "You're not important." Jess turned to him, deadpanned.

"Thanks," she said, but Jax just grinned.

"So you left pretty early this morning," he commented.

"Not early enough since I ran into your mom, your ex, and your son – who is adorable by the way – on the way out," Jess said. Jax continued grinning, looking as though he were trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, sorry about that," he said, not looking like he was sorry at all, "Did ma give you a hard time?"

"I don't really know what a hard time is to your family," Jess said.

"Did she, you know, get in your face and threaten you?" Jax asked. Jess shook her head, startled.

"What? No!" she said.

"Oh good," Jax responded, "She must like you then."

"Your family is crazy," Jess muttered and Jax nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, and did you say you were moving in with Lux?" Jax asked. Jess nodded, grinning at the irony.

"Yeah, I was having a hard time finding a place so Lux asked if I wanted to move in with her," she explained.

"Huh," Jax said, "Well you'll be close by then."

"Oh is her apartment close to here?" Jess asked. Jax pointed to a two story red bricked building across the street and Jess looked at him, eyebrows raised.

"Seriously?" she asked, "That close?" Jax nodded.

"Clay bought the building so no one could look in on TM. He uses the bottom for storage and Lux lives on the second floor. I think he likes having her close, after she insisted on moving out of the house," Jax said.

"Why is Clay so paranoid?" Jess asked, "It's a body shop. Why would anyone want to look in?" Jax shrugged noncommittally and Jess had the feeling he was trying to play it off.

"It's just Clay," he replied evasively, "He's a paranoid guy." Before Jess could ask any more questions, Lux walked out of the door and Jax looked over at her, grinning.

"Shut up," Lux immediately said, glaring at Jax. He laughed.

"I didn't say anything," he said.

"You were thinking it," she said, tapping her forehead.

"Is everything okay?" Jess asked. Lux waved her hand dismissively.

"Everything's fine," Lux said, "I mean what's he gonna do – ground me? Now let's go see the apartment."

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_**We know some people like to look at pictures of the inspirations behind our OC's and our original locations so we've made a photo bucket with pictures of it all. There are a few OC's you haven't met yet, but they will be coming in later chapters. The pictures are spoiler free, though! The link is on our profile, under the NEW START updates! :) **


	5. Chapter 5

Jess taped up the last box, surveying the room at Rose's she'd been living in the past few months. All it had taken was several boxes and two suitcases to erase any evidence that she'd ever been there. Her Aunt stood in the doorway, looking in.

"That didn't take long," Rose commented with a sad smile.

"I travel light," Jess told her. It was a habit she'd picked up quickly after moving from place to place as a kid in the system. The less she owned, the less she had to pack.

"Promise you'll come visit me?" Rose asked, a slight anxiousness in her voice.

"Of course," Jess said, hugging her Aunt tightly, "I'm only moving like a mile away. I'll be here so much you'll be sick of me." Rose nodded, her smile much more believable. Her eyes turned to the workout clothes Jess was wearing.

"I thought you had plans tonight?" she said.

"I do. I'm gonna go for a run first though, clear my head," Jess told her.

"I don't think I'll ever understand exercise as stress relief. Cupcakes. Now those are stress relief," Rose told her matter-of-factly. Jess laughed.

"Cupcakes are still stress relief, too," She assured her before walking out the door.

SOASOASOA

Halfway through her run, Jess had worked up a good sweat and was feeling good. She glanced at her watch and picked the pace up slightly so that she would have plenty of time to get ready before she met Lux for the party at the clubhouse. She frowned as the music in her headphones started to be drowned out by the unmistakable sound of a motorcycle, her heart rate picking up annoyingly as it had been prone to doing every time she heard the familiar roar since meeting Jax. She reminded herself that there were plenty of people in Charming who rode motorcycles and her luck couldn't be _that _terrible that Jax would ride by when she looked like a sweaty mess. She turned her head slightly to catch a glimpse of the driver and cursed as he pulled up next to her.

"Shit," she muttered, seeing Jax's grinning face and running her hands through her hair in a hopeless attempt of looking halfway decent. She'd had a grand plan of seeing him that night, dressed to the nines and smoking hot; not covered in sweat and panting.

"What are you doing?" He asked her as she pulled the earbuds out of her ear and came to a stop. She narrowed her eyes at his question as she held her breath, hoping to control her breathing and not pant like a dog.

"Running?" She told him with a questioning look.

"Why?" He asked, looking amused.

"I like to," She told him, shrugging as he looked at her like she was crazy.

"Fair enough," He told her. He hated to run, preferring weight lifting and boxing to stay in shape, but if running made her ass look like that, he wasn't going to discourage it, "Lux tell you about the party tonight?"

"Yes," She told him, grinning and not volunteering any other information. She knew why he was asking, but she still wanted to hear him say it.

He narrowed his eyes, before finally asking, "Well, are you going?"

"Yeah, I was planning on it," She said with a smirk, "You?"

"I've got some shit to take care of first, but I'll be there. I'll look for you," He told her with that panty dropping smile that had worked so well on her a few nights ago before revving his engine, waving goodbye as he drove away.

Jess waited until he was out of sight before putting her hands on her knees, panting heavily. He told her that he'd look for her. That meant something right? That meant that he was actively going to seek her out. But then she reminded herself that sleeping with Jax had been a one-time thing and she wouldn't be doing herself any favors indulging in this particular crush.

SOASOASOA

Jess looked herself over in the mirror, debating on changing her outfit for the fifth time. The jeans and strappy top she was wearing did make her ass and boobs look great and were clearly the more comfortable option, but the little black dress she had was much more 'sex goddess'. Jess noticed her Aunt walk in and turned to face her.

"Which one?" She asked motioning to the outfit she was wearing before holding the dress up.

"For a SAMCRO party? Definitely the jeans," Rose told her, sitting on the bed, "Your mom and I always laughed at the girls who wore the over the top dresses, said they looked desperate."

"You went to parties at the clubhouse?" Jess asked in slight disbelief.

"Oh yeah, they were the only place to hang out at that wasn't the church social or a scummy bar," Rose told her, reminiscing, "I wasn't there as much as Daisy, she practically lived there at one time, but I went enough. But that was all before you were born, of course."

Jess giggled finding it difficult to picture her schoolteacher Aunt as a wild biker girl. She sat on the bed next to Rose, grinning broadly.

"Did you ever… you know? With any of them?" Jess asked between giggles, her morbid curiosity getting the best of her. Rose smiled slyly, looking down as she noticeably blushed.

"A lady never tells," She murmured as Jess laughed louder.

"Aunt Rose!" Jess said in disbelief, "Who?!" she demanded.

"I never said I did anything!" Rose insisted, "Though if Robert is still around, you could give him my regards."

"Robert?" Jess muttered before placing the name, "BOBBY?!" She yelled, wrinkling her nose.

"He was much better looking back then!" Rose insisted. "He wasn't so…" She trailed off, as she pulled her shirt out, blowing her cheeks out to symbolize Bobby's round frame, "Anyway, he was a very sweet man. Used to call me Rosebud," Rose remembered fondly.

"Oh my God," Jess said her giggles dissolving, "I'll tell Bobby his Rosebud said hello." Rose laughed.

"Who else did you know that's still around?" Jess asked. Rose frowned as she thought.

"Well, I guess just Clay and Gemma, Piney, and Otto and Luann," she said. Jess raised her eyebrows.

"You never told me you knew Luann!" she said.

"Oh I didn't really _know _her," Rose told her, "She probably doesn't even remember me."

"Which one's Otto?" Jess asked. She'd gotten to know most of the members at least by name, but the name Otto didn't ring a bell.

"Oh that's Luann's husband," Rose told her, causing Jess's eyebrows to raise further.

"I didn't even know she was married," Jess said, still wondering why she hadn't met Otto, or at least seem him around Cara Cara at all.

"Oh, well, he's in prison. Been in for a while now," Rose told her.

"Oh," Jess responded, "For how much longer?"

"Forever," Rose said shrugging. Jess frowned, suddenly finding her heart aching for Luann.

"That sucks," she said lamely, "I guess that's why Luann doesn't talk about him."

"Yeah, probably so," Rose said, "Never seen two people more in love than them. But it seems like she's got a pretty good life going for herself." Jess nodded even though it was a statement she doubted either of them really believed. A successful business and nice things couldn't make up for being separated from the man you loved. She finally stood from the bed, kissing Rose on the cheek.

"Well I've got to go, don't wait up!" she said as she walked out of the door.

"You know I will!" Rose called to her retreating back.

"I know!" Jess called over her shoulder.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess pulled up to the clubhouse, a flood of nerves suddenly hitting her. She'd only ever seen the clubhouse in daylight when things always seemed much simpler. She had no idea what to expect of their parties. Tons of people were scattered around the lot, all laughing and drinking, and she made her way through the crowd. The door to the clubhouse opened just as she was about to reach for the door knob and Ima walked out, bumping into her. Ima backed up, looking annoyed until she saw it was Jess, at which time a sneer replaced her annoyance.

"Jess," she said unenthusiastically in greeting.

"Hey, Ima," Jess responded, sighing.

"Now don't go getting any stupid ideas about who you're going home with tonight," she said, leaning in towards Jess in what was clearly supposed to be a threatening manner.

"I don't have stupid ideas," Jess responded before walking past Ima and into the clubhouse.

She almost froze walking in, having never seen a scene like the one before her. Even working at a strip club for over a month had not prepared her for this. The music was blaring, all the girls were running around half naked, one on the stripper pole was completely naked, and she was pretty sure a guy was getting a blow job in the corner, but she didn't want to look too carefully. She took a deep breath, preparing herself, before making a beeline straight for the bar. Clay was leaning against it and looked over at her as she approached.

"So you're really moving in with Lux, huh?" he asked, having to raise his voice to be heard over the music, after Jess had gotten a whiskey and coke from the prospect manning the bar.

"Oh, yeah," Jess said, "I mean, if it's okay with you. I probably should have asked you first since it's your building." He smiled, shaking his head.

"No, it's definitely okay," he said, "Lux needs someone normal around her. You are normal right?" Jess shrugged.

"More normal that most of the girls at Cara Cara," she responded. Clay laughed, nodding in agreement.

"Well keep Lux out of trouble for me, will ya?" he asked.

"I'll try," Jess said grinning, surprised that it was Clay that made her start to relax in this environment, "But Lux kinda does what she wants." Clay nodded.

"Yeah, don't I know it," he replied.

"Speaking of, where is Lux?" Jess asked. Clay pointed to a table in the middle of the room where Lux sat with Tig, Juice, and Chibs.

"Thanks," Jess said before moving off and walking towards Lux's table.

"Jess! You're here!" Lux exclaimed, turning to Juice, who was sitting next to her, "Scoot over so Jess can sit down." Juice scooted his chair over, reaching back at the table behind them to grab an empty chair for Jess, which she took, thanking him.

"So are you still good to move in on Tuesday?" Lux asked. Jess nodded.

"Yeah, the furniture place is going to deliver my bedroom furniture in the morning but I'll need some help putting it together and getting my boxes upstairs," she said.

"Oh I'll help you," Lux said, "And by me, I mean them," she added, motioning to the guys at the table.

"Oh we will?" Tig asked while Juice and Chibs just looked at Lux with raised eyebrows.

"C'mon guys, don't make me tell my mother you don't want to help me," she said.

"There's no need to do anything rash," Chibs spoke up, grinning, "We'll help."

"I'll do anything to get out of work so I'll be there," Juice said, grinning.

"Thanks," Jess told them, "I really appreciate it." She glanced up as the conversation moved on, scanning the room while her brain told her to stop.

"Jax isn't here yet," Lux said, leaning towards her, grinning.

"I wasn't looking for Jax," Jess said quickly.

"Yeah… right," Lux said sarcastically.

"Ima already staked her claim on him anyway," Jess told her.

"Well then that settles it," Lux said, "Now you definitely have to do it."

"Do what?" Juice asked, leaning over.

"Nothing," Jess said at the same time Lux said, "Jax."

"I really don't want to get in the middle of whatever feud you and Ima have going on," Jess said to Lux. Lux shook her head, turning to Juice.

"I need you to do something for me," she said sweetly. Juice raised his eyebrows, looking hesitant.

"What?" he asked slowly.

"Keep Ima distracted," Lux told him, "Fuck her if you have to." Juice laughed.

"I think I can handle that," he said.

"Good," Lux said, "Now go – fulfill your mission." Juice shook his head, laughing, but rose from the table all the same and walked off, in search of Ima.

"There," Lux said to Jess, "Hurdle managed."

Jess shook her head but couldn't help laughing at the absurdity of the evening already. She glanced over at Tig who was sitting next to Lux and suddenly noticed how very close the two were to each other and that both of their hands were under the table. She looked questioningly at Lux but decided to file that away and ask Lux about it another day. She tossed back the rest of her drink, running to the bar to grab another before sitting back at the table next to Lux.

"Look who just walked in," Lux said after Jess had sat down and she looked up to see Jax walk in, looking sexy as always and slightly annoyed.

"He looks stressed," Lux commented as Jess nodded in agreement, "Maybe you should go relieve some of his tension."

"I'm not gonna go make myself look completely desperate," Jess told her, rolling her eyes. Lux shrugged.

"Why not? That's what all the other girls do," she said. Jess glanced around the room to see countless half naked girls literally throwing themselves at anyone with a patch and shook her head.

"Exactly," she said, "It was a one night stand. Emphasis on the one."

"Yeah," Lux scoffed, "Until it happens again."

Jess turned away from Lux to see Chibs rise from the table as she threw back the rest of second drink, which she could tell had been incredibly strong. Though, that was probably a good thing as she knew she was going to need to get a lot more drunk to make it through a party like this one.

"Can I stay with you tonight?" Jess asked Lux, already feeling the whiskey beginning to affect her, "I don't want to have to drive home." Lux exchanged glances with Tig before turning back to Jess.

"Uh yeah," Lux said, looking slightly disappointed, "Of course. Why wouldn't that be okay?" Jess cocked her head, looking strangely at her friend.

"Okay…" Jess said. Lux shrugged.

"I mean I'm just gonna be over there sleeping… by myself," Lux rattled, "It's not like anyone's gonna be climbing up the fire escape, through the guest room window and ravishing me all night…. Anymore."

"Ooookay," Jess said, smirking at her friend as she shook her head, "I don't even want to know. I'm gonna go call my aunt and let her know I won't be home tonight." Lux nodded as Jess rose, stopping by the bar to get another drink before walking out the side door beside the kitchen, thankful to get away from the noise, and not noticing Jax's eyes following her as she walked out the door.

After hanging up the phone with Rose, Jess sat on a picnic table just outside the door, relishing in the quiet as she pulled out her pack of cigarettes. She could still hear the muffled sounds of the party through the door and the hollers of party goers on the parking lot at the front of the clubhouse, but this spot was a nice break from all that. Describing this party as overwhelming would be an understatement; she'd never been to a party as crazy as the one going on inside and she definitely needed a few minutes to recoup.

She lit a cigarette, breathing in deeply, thinking to herself that she probably wouldn't get so winded on her runs if she could just fucking quit smoking, when a hand ran down the area of her shoulder blade covered in a tattoo and she jumped, startled out of her thoughts. She turned to see Jax standing behind her, grinning.

"Jesus, Jax," she said, "I think you just scared 10 years off my life!" He laughed, taking a seat next to her on top of the picnic table.

"Yeah, well those years suck anyway," He responded, offering the half empty whiskey bottle he held in his hands. Jess took it, taking a large swig before setting it on the table and Jax reached in his pocket, pulling a joint out.

"I like smoking it out here during parties because no one comes to this side of the building so I never have to share," he told her grinning.

"Are you gonna share with me?" Jess asked, smiling back.

"Yeah I guess I could do that," Jax said, grinning as he lit the joint. He took a long hit, handing it to her as he slowly exhaled.

"You wanna see my party trick?" Jess asked as she took a hit. Jax looked over at her, amused, and nodded as Jess blew out, forming several large smoke rings. They watched as they slowly disappeared and Jess turned proudly to Jax, who laughed.

"Very nice," he said and Jess grinned, wondering if the light headedness she was feeling was caused by the weed, all the whiskey she'd been drinking, or Jax. Either way, she knew she was halfway past drunk and on her way to high.

"So what does it mean?" Jax asked. Jess turned to look at him.

"What does what mean?" she asked, squinting one eye to try and stop seeing double.

"The tattoo," he said, motioning to the tattoo that from far away looked like a bar code running down her shoulder blade, but up close were a series of names.

"Oh, those are all the foster homes I lived in growing up," Jess explained.

"I didn't know you were adopted," Jax said, surprised.

"I wasn't," she said, grinning, "That's why I was in foster homes." Jax rolled his eyes, taking another hit off the joint and offering it to Jess, who took it.

"Smart ass," he said as he exhaled. Jess took a hit, looking down, her grin fading.

"Actually I was adopted," she said, "When I was a baby. But they died when I was 4." Jax raised his eyebrows but no one was more surprised at her words than Jess. She couldn't remember the last time she'd talked about her adoptive parents.

"You're fucking with me," he said. Jess shook her head, blowing the smoke out.

"No, I'm not," she said, "Car accident."

"How the hell are you not fucked up?" Jax asked her.

"Oh I am," Jess replied, the grin back on her face, "It's just next to Lux I look normal." Jax laughed.

"Next to Lux, Michael Jackson looks normal," he said, and Jess giggled.

"Next to Lux, Dennis Rodman looks normal," she replied, feeling the weed getting to her head as they both doubled over laughing.

"Next to Lux, Marilyn Manson looks normal," Jax said as Jess broke out into renewed a fit of giggles.

"Is this really that funny or is it the weed?" Jess asked, gasping for breath.

"I think it's really that funny," Jax responded, still laughing. Jess leaned against Jax, trying to get her breath back but she couldn't stop laughing. Everything was ridiculously funny to her just then and Jax seemed to be having similar issues.

"Stop! I can't laugh anymore," Jess said, "It hurts. I don't have rock hard abs like you." They both sat there like that until their giggles subsided and they both got their breath back.

"What were you doing out here anyway?" Jax asked her.

"I needed to call my aunt. And I needed to get away from all the craziness inside and away from Lux insisting I fuck you," Jess said, her eyes widening as the words fell from her mouth due to her current lack of inhibitions, "I… probably shouldn't have said that." Jax looked down at her, his eyes glinting with amusement as he slid off the picnic table, moving to stand between her legs, his hands running up and down her thighs.

"I think you should tell me more about that," he said, leaning over and kissing her. Jess felt her head get dizzy as his lips pressed against hers and she leaned toward him.

"Lux just wants to piss off Ima," Jess said as Jax moved his lips to her neck. Jess closed her eyes, leaning her neck back as she ran a hand through his hair.

"So that's why you want to fuck me?" Jax whispered in her ear before taking her earlobe between his teeth, causing Jess to moan.

"No, I want to fuck you because you're dead sexy," she murmured, throwing all caution to the wind. Her brain tried to remind her of all the reasons she had to not do this again, but her lust won out.

"Oh yeah?" Jax asked, his voice husky, before kissing her on the lips again.

"Mmmhmmm," Jess moaned into his kiss as Jax pushed her back on the table so she was lying down. He moved down her body, kissing her stomach as his fingers reached for the button of her jeans and reality crashed back onto Jess.

"Can we go inside?" she asked, her hand over his, stopping him from unbuttoning her jeans.

"Why?" he asked, looking down at her.

"I don't want anyone to come out and see," she said.

"Would going inside make you happy?" he asked.

"Yes," she said as Jax leaned over her and kissed her.

"If we go inside will you make me happy?" he murmured against her lips.

"I will make you so happy," Jess whispered.

"Let's go inside then," he said, standing up and grabbing her hand. Jess glanced at the nearly empty whiskey bottle Jax had brought out that was now sitting on the table before looking back up at Jax.

"You're not gonna get whiskey dick are you?" she asked. Jax raised his eyebrows, giving her a look that clearly said 'are you serious?'

"I don't have that problem," he told her, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close to him, proving just how much he didn't have that problem.

"Just making sure," Jess giggled as he kissed her again.

"Darlin', you never have to worry about that," he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her into the clubhouse. Jess passed by Lux on the way to the back.

"I don't need to stay with you after all!" Jess called to her. Lux beamed immediately, glancing at Tig, before dropping her grin and pretending to look upset.

"Oh, darn!" Lux said. Jess laughed as Jax pulled her around the corner, out of sight of the rest of the party.

* * *

**_Author's Note:_****Thanks SO much to everyone who reviewed and alerted the last chapter!  
****This chapter was the hardest one to write so far so we'd appreciate any feedback you might have! Next chapter will be a continuation of this night and again and your feedback will really help us be sure that we're on the right track! **


	6. Chapter 6

_**Author's Note: **_**Thank you so so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! We loved hearing what y'all thought and really really appreciate the feedback! **

**A word of warning before you read this new chapter - there's a scene that gets about as close to M as we'll get in this story. I thought about cutting it out to be safe, but the scene just didn't flow the right way without it. It's nothing graphic and it's short, but I wanted to put a disclaimer as we have this story rated T, and think for the most part it aligns with that rating and I didn't want to change the rating or the story for a couple of sentences.**

* * *

Jess collapsed on top of Jax, rolling over and breathing heavy, completely spent. Jax, grinning in satisfaction, reached over for his cigarettes and pulled one out, offering the pack to Jess, who took one. He lit it for her and they both leaned back against the headboard, the sheets in tangles around them. Jess finally stubbed her cigarette out on the ashtray as she looked curiously at Jax. She had finally regained the ability to see straight, but it would be a long time before she felt completely sober again. He glanced over at her, grinning slightly at her curious gaze.

"What?" he asked. She grinned mischievously at him as she got to her knees and flung a leg over Jax, straddling him. He ran his hands slowly up her thighs until they settled on her waist.

"Let's take a shower," Jess murmured, kissing him lightly. Jax grinned, his hands roaming up her back.

"Okay," he said, his eyes full of amusement.

"Good. Because I have a theory," she said, her hands running along his chest and down to his abs.

"Oh yeah?" he asked, grinning as he glanced down to watch her hands, "And what's your theory darlin'?"

"My theory," Jess said, her hands trailing up again before wrapping her arms around his shoulders, "Is that if you look this good dry, you'll look even hotter wet." Jax laughed, cocking an eyebrow at her.

"Well let's go test your theory," he said, grabbing onto her and flipping over so she was beneath him. He kissed her, his lips lingering on hers before standing up and leading her into the bathroom.

They both stood under the hot water and Jess grabbed the soap, running it down his body, any excuse to touch him. As she rubbed it into his skin he walked her back, pushing her against the wall of the shower and pressed his body firmly against hers, kissing her hard. He hooked his hand under her knee, pulling it up and out as he swiftly entered her. She let out soft moans as he pumped in and out of her, stretching her neck back as he buried his face into her until he finished. He kissed her once more, pushing the wet hair away from her face as they moved under the water.

"So how's your theory hold up?" Jax asked, grinning as the water cascaded around him. She stared back at him for a moment, biting her lip subconsciously, her breath catching in her throat as she watched the water over his shoulders and down his body.

"Damn I was right," she finally said, smiling back at him. He laughed as he shut the water off and they stepped out of the shower. She towel dried as he walked into his bedroom, grabbing a t-shirt and tossing it to her to sleep in. She threw it on and crawled into bed next to him, his arm wrapped around her shoulder, holding her close to his body. They lay like that for a while, neither quite able to fall asleep. Giving up, Jess propped herself up on her elbows and looked down at Jax.

"So what does it mean, being vice president of the Sons?" she asked, a question she'd been pondering since meeting him at the Hairy Dog and seeing the patch on his cut. Jax breathed deeply, his fingers running up and down her arm.

"Mostly I just keep Clay in check," he responded, "Since he's President."

"But…what kinds of stuff do you guys do?" Jess asked, prodding him further.

"Oh, bike stuff. Motorcycle rallies, charity runs, things like that. We have a lot of charters all over that we like to go visit, so mostly we're just planning and organizing those kinds of things," he said. It seemed as if it was a rehearsed answer, but Jess let it go. She had a feeling there were a lot of things about the club nobody was telling her.

"Hm," she murmured, "So how long have you been in it?"

"The club?" Jax asked, "I mean, it's been my whole life. My dad helped start the club. Part of the First 9."

"Oh, really?" Jess asked, and Jax nodded, "What happened to your dad?"

"Died," Jax replied, "Motorcycle accident. I was pretty young when it happened. It was right after my little brother died so it was really hard on me and ma."

"I'm sorry," Jess whispered.

"Yeah, well, we've all got tragedies, right?" Jax asked, his fingers still grazing up and down her arm.

"Yeah, I guess so," Jess said. Now that she had Jax talking, she found she had so many questions about him burning her brain. He was a mystery to her, though she knew it would probably take more than a night of Q&A to solve this one, "What about Abel?" she asked.

"What about him?" Jax asked.

"Tell me about him," Jess prodded and Jax grinned.

"Well he's three," Jax began. Jess cocked her head to the side as she looked down at him, "And he's a great kid. He almost didn't make it. His birth mother was a fucking junkie who shot up while she was pregnant. He was premature, lotta complications. Doc's fixed him up good. Tara was one of the surgeons operating on him." Jess squirmed uncomfortably, not liking being half naked next to a fully naked Jax, talking about his ex, but she supposed Tara went with Abel territory.

"My mom was a junkie, too," Jess told him, "I mean, my birth mom. And by was I mean… probably still is."

"Shit sucks," Jax murmured in commiseration. Jess nodded, wondering if he'd continue to answer questions if she continued to ask, but it seemed like he had questions of his own.

"So how come you're friends with Lux?" Jax asked her. She laughed, shaking her head.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I mean, she's a little crazy," Jax said, though there was nothing but fondness in his voice, "Why didn't you go running for the hills?" Jess laughed.

"You know, growing up in foster care, you learn to look past perception. I was always judged for being a foster kid – kids at school would make fun of me, no one to eat lunch with, all that stupid school shit you deal with. I get the feeling Lux had it the same way," Jess said. Jax nodded, sighing.

"Yeah, it was always hard for her to make friends, being so closely related to the club. People were either afraid of her, or used her to get closer to us," Jax told her. Jess glanced up at the window, noticing the haze of early morning beginning to shine through the window.

"Holy shit we've been up all night," she commented in surprise. Jax looked up at the window then back at her, grinning, before he crawled out of bed.

"Come on," he said.

"Where are we going?" she asked as he pulled on a pair of sweat pants.

"Just come on!" he said again.

"But I don't have any pants on," she said, crawling out of bed. Jax threw a pair of shorts at her and she pulled them on, flipping the band over several times until they fit around her waist without falling down.

"Alright now come on," Jax said, opening the door and waiting for her to walk out. He led her to the middle of the hallway where there was a steel ladder attached to the wall and he jumped on it, immediately climbing up. Jess raised her eyebrows but followed him up to find them on the roof of the clubhouse, overlooking the lot with a perfect view of the sunrise.

"Oh my God," Jess murmured as Jax sat down. It was a beautiful California sunrise – the sky filled with gold and copper and pink. It felt like it had been made just for them, while the rest of the world slept. Jess sat next to him, her head on his shoulder as he slung his arm around her.

"It's beautiful," Jess murmured, staring out at the sky as the wind rustled around them, "Sunrises always remind me of my dad – the one that adopted me. He used to wake me up so early every day there was a good sunrise. He'd take me into the backyard and drink coffee and I'd sit on his lap and we'd just watch it."

"Do you remember a lot about them?" Jax asked. Jess shrugged.

"I remember little things, bits here and there," she said, "But mostly I just remember those sunrises. And then I remember the police telling me they'd been in a car accident and they were dead. I didn't really understand what they meant. I spent the next few years in foster care waiting for them to come get me until I finally realized they were never coming back." She stopped talking, slightly startled at the ease in which she'd revealed that. It wasn't something she tended to share with acquaintances, even those she'd seen naked several times.

Jax wrapped his arms more tightly around her, assuming correctly that Jess didn't need a response. She leaned against him as they stared out at the sun until it had fully risen before they climbed back down the ladder and walked back to his dorm, finally falling asleep.

SOASOASOASOA

Jess woke several hours later, her head pounding and feeling like misery. She groaned as the sun shone brightly through the worthless blinds hanging in the window and glanced down at Jax, still sleeping soundly. She crawled out of bed, still wearing Jax's t-shirt and shorts, and walked down the hallway to try and find coffee.

Walking into the clubhouse, she saw Gemma and Lux sitting at the bar drinking coffee and the aroma made her cravings kick in. Lux grinned widely when she saw Jess walk in, wagging her eyebrows at her.

"Morning, slut!" Lux said, far too chipper for this time of day as Gemma looked knowingly at Jess from beside her. Jess sat next to Lux, cupping her head in her hands and groaning.

"I am never doing that again," she muttered.

"What, drinking or fucking my son?" Gemma asked. Lux grinned with amused glee at Jess as she looked up at them.

"Both," she said meekly.

"Isn't that what you said last time?" Lux asked, "I give it a week. For both."

"All I want right now is a cup of coffee," Jess moaned. Gemma motioned for one of the prospects standing around, Rat, and he ran and brought her a cup of coffee, setting the mug down in front of her. Jess stared at it for a second before looking up at Rat, beaming at him.

"Thank you," she said gratefully, taking a sip, "You're my hero."

"You really look like shit," Lux said. Jess scowled, looking over at her.

"Yeah, thanks," she grumbled, "I got a whole two hours of fucking sleep."

"Good God," Lux replied as her eyebrows shot up in surprise, "I had no idea he could go that long."

"No, we were up talking all night," Jess said.

"You were… talking… all night?" Lux asked, her voice full of surprise. Jess nodded, glancing awkwardly at Gemma as she decided not to go into all the other stuff they did, too.

"Yeah.. pretty much," she said, "And then when the sun started coming up we went up on the roof to watch." Lux and Gemma exchanged stunned looks and then both turned to stare at Jess.

"You did what now?" Lux asked.

"We went on the roof to watch the sun rise," Jess repeated. Lux's eyebrows receded nearly to her hairline. The look of shock on her face would have been funny to Jess if it hadn't been so early in the morning.

"But… that's his spot," Lux said, "He doesn't like anyone going up there. I can't remember him ever taking a girl up there." She glanced conspiratorially at Gemma, lowering her voice, "Not even Tara." She turned back to Jess, "I wonder why he took _you_ up?" Jess shrugged, thinking she might have just been insulted but not having the energy to know or care.

"I don't have enough brain cells to theorize anything right now," she muttered, not really sure how she felt about this new bit of information. She didn't have long to think about it before Tara walked into the clubhouse holding Abel and walked up to them. Jess turned away from her, hoping to God Tara didn't recognize the shirt she was wearing as Jax's. The situation was still complicated enough as it was and she still didn't really know what was going on.

"Where's Jax?" Tara asked.

"And good morning to you, too," Lux said snidely. Gemma rolled her eyes at Lux before turning back to Tara.

"He's in the back," she said. Tara nodded, her eyes darting down the hallway that lead to the dorms before looking back at Gemma.

"Is he… alone?" Tara asked. Lux looked over at Jess, whose face was now burning, before turning back to Tara.

"He is now," she said. Tara glanced at Jess, recognition dawning on her face, before she looked quickly away and turned her attention on Gemma.

"Will you watch Abel? I need to talk to Jax about something," she said. Gemma nodded, holding her arms out for Abel, who giggled and wrapped his arms around her neck. Soon after Tara disappeared to the back, the next last person Jess felt like seeing walked down the hall and into the clubhouse: Ima.

"What are _you_ still doing here?" Lux asked rudely.

"Doesn't anyone say good morning anymore?" Ima asked in sarcastic exasperation. They all stared at her, waiting for a response to Lux's question. Instead, Ima's eyes fell upon Jess and they narrowed at the sight of her wearing Jax's clothes.

"That's funny," Ima said, placing a hand delicately on her hip, "I assumed from the dead silence coming from Jax's room that he was alone."

"Yeah, well, you assumed wrong," Lux replied for Jess, who wanted nothing more than to enjoy her coffee in peace. Ima ignored Lux, continuing to stare spitefully at Jess.

"Don't you know, honey? Jax likes a screamer," she said, tossing her long hair over her shoulder as she grinned cockily. Jess rolled her eyes.

"Oh he was definitely satisfied by the time I left his room," Jess said, turning back to her coffee and ignoring Ima.

"You are so clueless as to what Jax wants, its actually funny," Lux said, "He knows your legs will spread for anything and yet, he wasn't with you last night." The grin was wiped off Ima's face as she glared at Lux and Gemma sighed, rolling her eyes.

"I'd prefer Abel not to know all about his dad's sexual interests at 3 years old," she said, bouncing Abel on her knee as he looked at everyone with interest.

"That means you can leave," Lux said to Ima.

"I was invited," Ima replied haughtily, crossing her arms across her chest.

"You were invited to the party," Lux corrected, standing up and walking towards Ima, "Party's over, invitation's over." Ima scowled at her.

"I'm so sick of you trying to order me around like you're a fucking princess around here!" she yelled. Lux blinked at her.

"I am the fucking princess around here," she said. She pointed back at where Gemma still sat at the bar, holding Abel, "Queen," she said, pointing back at herself, "Princess." She took a step closer to Ima, pointing her finger in her face, "Skanky bitch."

Ima slapped Lux's hand out of her face just before Lux slapped Ima across the face. Jess jumped up from her spot at the bar as Gemma yelled, "Lux!"

Ima pulled a gun out of her purse, pointing it directly at Lux, who froze. Jess saw Rat run to the back, presumably to get Jax, while everyone else in the clubhouse froze, staring at Ima.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing!" Lux shrieked at her, her arms held up. Abel began sobbing on Gemma's lap as she began patting his back soothingly.

"Ima, put the gun away," Gemma said as calmly as she could, but Ima shook her head, her eyes wide as if she knew she'd made a bad decision and wasn't quite sure how to get out of it. Jess's head was still pounding, feeling as if it was going to explode, and she finally did.

"Jesus Christ, Ima!" Jess yelled, walking up to her. Ima turned, pointing the gun at Jess, but she was too hung over and in too much pain to think straight or to care.

"Put that shit away, there's a fucking baby in here!" Jess yelled, reaching for the gun in Ima's hand. She grabbed hold of the barrel and Ima shrieked, yanking it out of Jess' grip and accidentally firing the gun into the floor right in front of Jess's feet. Jess screamed, her head really feeling like it was now exploding, and jumped back, staring in shock at Ima. Ima stared back for half a second before running towards the front door of the club house.

"Yeah you better keep that gun close, bitch!" Lux shrieked after her, "You're gonna need it!" Ima ran out of the door just as Jax, Tara, and every other Son that had just been sleeping all ran into the room.

"What the fuck is going on!?" Jax yelled. Lux turned around angrily to look at Jax.

"That stupid cunt!" she yelled, "Ima just pulled a damn gun on everyone, and Jess tried to grab it from her and the stupid bitch fired it into the floor."

Jess wasn't listening. She was still staring at the bullet hole in the floor in complete shock. She'd never heard a gun go off before. Not in person anyway. And certainly not so close to her. She was vaguely aware of Chibs pulling a chair up to her and helping her to sit down, but her eyes never moved from that spot in the floor.

"She's in shock," Chibs said and Jax walked over to her, squatting in front of Jess and taking her face gingerly in his hands.

"Hey, I got a gun pulled on me first!" Lux said, but she was smiling, "Nice to see where your loyalties lie, big brother." She grinned over at Gemma, who was watching Jax with Jess closely.

"Never do that again," Jax said softly when Jess had finally made eye contact with him. He ran his thumb gently across her cheek, "You could have been hurt."

"I… I wasn't thinking," Jess mumbled, "Abel was crying and Ima had that gun and…."

"Geez, Jess, I thought orphans were supposed to be street smart," Lux commented.

"Jax," Tara said, her voice slightly annoyed, "We need to finish our talk before I have to go to work." Jax looked back at Jess, his face creased with worry.

"I'm okay," she told him and he nodded, standing up and walking back to Tara.

"I… have to go," Jess muttered, standing quickly and running back to Jax's room to quickly get her things before speeding out of the clubhouse, not taking a second glance at Jax or Tara or anyone else.

* * *

**_Author's Note: _Thanks for reading! Again, we really appreciate your feedback and it really helps us in our chapter! And a shout out to the guest who reviewed the last chapter (who we're pretty sure is GeorgieGirl75?) whose last review actually did inspire a change in this chapter. So please continue to let us know what you think, because it really does help us!  
**


	7. Chapter 7

Jax was not in the best of moods as he pulled back into the TM lot. Waking up to Tara knocking on his door and finding Jess gone, then the whole mess with Ima… it hadn't been the best of mornings.

'_But it had been one hell of a night,' _he thought to himself, recalling his late night with Jess. He swung his leg off his bike, looking over to see Lux chasing Abel around the playground and smiled. If anything could put him in a better mood, it was his kid. He watched Abel shriek with glee, the late afternoon sun reflecting off of his light hair, as Lux finally caught him, wrapping her arms around him and lifting him high in the air. Jax walked through the gate of the playground as Abel wriggled out of Lux's grip, running to the swings.

"Push me!" he hollered at his aunt, who laughed and ran to do his bidding as Jax took a seat on the bench.

"Look, daddy!" Abel yelled and Jax lifted his chin up, smiling at his son.

"I'm watching," he said as Abel pumped his feet back and forth as he had been taught. He looked proudly back at Jax for affirmation, "Good job, buddy!" Abel smiled broadly before dragging his feet along the ground to stop himself and hopped off the swing to run up the slide. Lux laughed, shaking her head at him as she took a seat next to Jax on the bench.

"So…" Lux said, eyeing Jax excitedly. He looked over at her, waiting for her to say what she was gonna say. He knew his sister well enough to know it was coming," You like Jess, huh?" she blurted, acting like the kid sister she'd always been to him. Jax rolled his eyes, glancing sideways at Lux.

"Yeah, I was thinkin' of askin' her to the prom," he said sarcastically, "Thought I'd get a tux, rent a limo, whole 9." Lux grinned.

"Yeah, yeah, avoid the question," she said, "It's cool, I know you do even if you don't tell me. You took her _on the roof_."

"That wasn't a big deal," Jax told her.

"You don't take anyone on the roof," Lux says, "You don't even like me going up there."

"That's because you're annoying," Jax said, causing Lux's smile to widen. She shook her head.

"Say what you want – I know you care about her. I can tell," Lux said, never one to be deterred. Jax shrugged, turning back to watch Abel run around the playground before climbing up the ladder to the slide.

Truthfully, he didn't know how he felt about Jess. He knew she was fun and sexy and a breath of fresh air from the crow eaters that had infested his life since he and Tara split. He knew that in the small amount of time he'd spent with her, he'd been happier than he'd been in a long time and it had felt easy. He knew that last night had changed things and that he hadn't been able to stop thinking about her all day, but his life was too complicated for a relationship. His failed relationship with Tara was proof of that.

"It doesn't matter, anyway," Jax finally responded, "She thinks we're a bunch of mechanics who sit around and talk about bikes."

"So?" Lux said.

"So, if we got closer… if she knew more… she wouldn't be able to handle it, Lux," Jax said. Lux sighed, frowning as she eyed her brother.

"I don't think you're giving her much credit," she told him, but Jax just shrugged, "Look, I get that Tara couldn't handle your life and now you think it's a hopeless cause, but it's not, Jax. You deserve to be happy, and you deserve someone who will make you happy, whether it's Jess or someone else. But don't close yourself off to the possibility just because you've been hurt."

Jax pursed his lips but didn't respond, instead continuing to stare at the playground watching Abel. It was irritating sometimes how alike Lux and Gemma were – how they both had the uncanny ability to know exactly what he was thinking and use it as justification to interfere with his life as much as possible.

"It's really none of your business," he finally replied, knowing that it was a hopeless cause. To Lux, anything was her business if she wanted it to be. She just rolled her eyes at him, shaking her head as she turned back to Abel.

"Hey, Abel! Come here!" she called. Abel glanced up and ran over to them, looking at his aunt expectantly.

"Do you like Jess?" Lux asked, grinning. Jax sighed, turning his face to the sky.

"Who?" Abel asked.

"I'll give you a cookie if you say yes," Lux whispered in his ear.

"Yes!" Abel screamed and Lux beamed at Jax.

"See, he's got no problem admitting it," she said. Jax couldn't help but chuckle at her. As interfering as she was, he still loved his little sister.

"You know you have to give him a cookie now, right?" Jax asked and Lux laughed, nodding.

"Yeah, yeah, hey your daddy'll get you the cookie," Lux said, ruffling Abel's hair. Jax scowled at Lux, who shrugged innocently as Abel looked at Jax with excitement.

"Alright kid, we'll get a cookie," Jax said, standing up and picking Abel up. He walked out of the gate of the playground just as Gemma walked in.

"What are you two up to?" she asked, kissing Abel on the cheek.

"He's getting a cookie," Jax said, "Blame Lux." Gemma raised her eyebrows as they walked off to the clubhouse and she turned to look at Lux.

"Well what are _you_ up to?" she asked.

"Trying to get Jax to stop being stupid," Lux replied, "I'm about to go over to Jess's to make sure she's okay."

"Oh, I'll come with you," Gemma stated quickly. Lux narrowed her eyes at her mom.

"Why?" she asked slowly. Gemma shrugged.

"Do I need a reason to want to spend some time with you?" she asked. Lux rolled her eyes.

"You just want to pump Jess for information," she said, "Well I can tell you, if she's as stubborn and stupid as Jax, she won't give you much." Gemma shrugged as she followed Lux out of the gate, closing it behind them.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Gemma pulled up to Rose's house, Lux in the passenger seat. It was a small two bedroom just off the main road, but even from the outside it seemed cozy. Gemma looked up at the house, pushing her sunglasses onto her head as she and Lux stepped out of the car.

"What'd you say Jess's Aunt's name was?" Gemma asked as they walked to the door.

"Rose," Lux repeated, "Rose Tyler." Gemma nodded, feeling as if the name sounded familiar but couldn't quite place where she knew it from. Lux knocked on the door and stepped back as she heard movement inside before the door opened and Rose looked out at them.

"Hey, Rose," Lux said, walking in before being invited, Gemma following, "Jess around?" Rose nodded.

"She's in her room," she said. Lux nodded as she walked to the back of the house, leaving Gemma with Rose in the kitchen. Lux was on a mission, and she didn't need Gemma there interfering.

Jess was lying on her stomach on her bed listening to her iPod when she heard the tell-tale signs of a Lux intrusion. She glanced up as Lux said "Knock knock" and smiled as her friend walked into the room.

"Hey," Jess said sitting up as Lux made her way to the bed. Most of the room was piled in boxes that Lux had to maneuver around before she finally managed to take a seat next to Jess on the bed.

"I just wanted to check on you, make sure you didn't have any PTSD after this morning," Lux said, worry creasing her forehead. Jess shrugged, shaking her head. Having a gun pulled on her for the first time in her life first thing in the morning definitely shook her up, but after several cups of decaf and a Xanax raided from Rose's medicine cabinet, she was feeling much better.

"I'm fine," she said. Lux nodded, but still looked worried.

"You didn't change your mind about moving in did you?" she asked. Jess shook her head.

"No," she said, "I mean… I thought about it, but it's not your fault Ima's a crazy bitch. You just have to promise that no guns will get pulled on me again when I'm sleep deprived and hung over." Lux grinned.

"Deal," she said, "And by deal I mean… I'll do what I can." Jess laughed.

"Fair enough," she said. Lux grinned, crossing her legs as she looked at Jess excitedly, which always made Jess nervous.

"Ok then," she said, "Now that my mom's not around… did you and Jax really just talk all night?" Jess hesitated, finally giving Lux a short nod.

"I mean… we did… other stuff, too," she said awkwardly. As much as Lux insisted she wanted to know, talking about her brother with her still felt a little weird, "But we did a lot of talking." She glanced at Lux, hoping that answer would satiate her, but she should've known better.

"So… do you like him?" Lux finally asked. Jess shrugged, glancing down at her lap as she fiddled with her iPod.

The short answer, Jess had discovered, was yes. She did like him, or as much as she could for not having known him very long. To deny the effect he had on her would be idiotic. Palms sweating, heart racing, blood rushing to her head. However, the long answer was much more complicated than that. Part of her was terrified of Jax. She knew he wasn't like any other man she'd ever met, and that if she was going to do this with him, it would be entirely by his rules. She also knew his well-deserved reputation and she had a feeling she didn't affect him the same way he affected her.

"I'm really not trying to read too much into anything," Jess finally said, afraid to let too much out, "We just had a fun night and I'm leaving it at that."

"Ohhh. So you do like him," Lux said, grinning broadly. Jess rolled her eyes.

"You're ridiculous," she said. Lux was quiet for a moment, looking at Jess, before she finally spoke again.

"I think he likes you, too," she said, watching Jess carefully and smiling in satisfaction as she saw the blush creep into her cheeks. Part of Jess wanted to be 16 again and jump for joy at the possibility. Another part of her was scared of getting her hopes up in case Lux was wrong.

"Lux…" Jess said warningly, "Stop."

"Don't worry," Lux said, ignoring her, "I'll find out for sure." Jess' eyes widened as she slowly shook her head back and forth.

"Oh my God, Lux, we are not in high school. I don't need you to go asking him to check the box yes or no," Jess said firmly.

"Don't you want to know?" Lux asked.

"Not like that!" Jess yelled.

"Whatever."

"I'm serious!"

"Okay."

"You're still going to talk to him aren't you?"

"Oh yeah, of course."

Jess rolled her eyes, shaking her head as she looked at Lux.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Rose smiled awkwardly at Gemma as Lux ran off to Jess' room, leaving the two alone. She motioned to the living room and they walked inside, taking a seat on the couch. Rose glanced at Gemma nervously, flashbacks of her nights at the clubhouse so many years ago flooding back when Gemma ruled the place with an iron fist. She was still just as intimidating now as she was then. Rose shifted slightly in her seat, wondering why she was there.

Gemma looked at Rose curiously, trying to place her face, but she still couldn't remember. She shook her head slightly, trying to refocus on why she was there. She knew next to nothing about Jess, apart from that she was a waitress with Lux at Cara Cara and she lived with her aunt who, from what Lux had told her, was her only family. But she knew she wasn't the only one who felt the connection between Jax and Jess that morning at the clubhouse, and her first instinct was that this might be just what he needed. But as was her usual way, she needed more information before she could decide.

"So it's been a long time," Rose finally said after several moments of silence.

"Mmmhmmm," Gemma said, still trying to remember where she knew Rose from. Rose chuckled.

"You probably don't even remember me," she said. Gemma cocked her head slightly.

"Did you used to hang out at the clubhouse?" she finally guessed, smiling as Rose nodded.

"Yeah, with my sister, Daisy," Rose said. Dawning recognition fell over Gemma as she nodded.

"Ahh Daisy," Gemma replied, "I do remember Daisy."

"Yeah, she's a hard one to forget," Rose said. Gemma nodded, smiling at Rose.

"Well, Lux is very excited that Jess is moving in," Gemma finally said and Rose nodded, smiling, "I'm just sorry I haven't gotten more of a chance to know her. I mean, I don't even think I know where she's from or what brought her to Charming."

"Well she grew up in Santa Barbara," Rose said, "I finally talked her into moving up here to Charming. I wanted her to be closer to me and I knew she wasn't too happy in Santa Barbara. Things seem to be going great for her here, so far." Gemma nodded.

"Lux tells me you're the only family she's got around, anymore," Gemma said, "It's so great you two are so close. Family is so important." Rose nodded, a sad look in her eye.

"Yes, I'm really glad I was able to find her," she said. Gemma's brow creased briefly in confusion.

"Find her?" Gemma repeated. Rose nodded.

"She grew up in the foster care system," she explained.

"Oh yeah, that's right," Gemma said, "Well in that case, I hope she'll be sticking around Charming for a long time." She looked expectantly at Rose and could tell by Rose's expression she'd finally pushed her luck.

"Gemma, if you've got something to ask, just ask," Rose said, finally remembering that this was her house and not the clubhouse, and Gemma was not in charge here, "No need beating around the bush." Gemma smiled as kindly as she could, shrugging her shoulders innocently.

"I'm just trying to get an idea of what kind of girl she is," she said, "Seeing as how she's going to be Lux's roommate now."

"Well, she's a good girl," Rose replied, "Considering her childhood, I'd say she's a pretty amazing girl. But I don't think she'd like me sitting here telling stories to you about her, so if you want to know something, it might be best if you just ask her."

"I just want to make sure there's no skeletons in her closet that will affect my daughter," Gemma said. '_Or my son,' _she thought to herself. Rose raised her eyebrows.

"I think I have a little more reason to worry about Jess moving in with Lux than you," Rose replied coolly, "And yet, you don't see me grilling you with questions about the girl's background."

Gemma smiled again, nodding in assent. She found she liked Rose, and if Jess was anything like her aunt, there might be hope for her yet. She wanted more than anything for Jax to find a great girl, someone to make him happy, someone to be there for him through thick and thin. Lord knew none of the girls prancing around the clubhouse on Friday nights would ever fit the bill. She didn't know yet if Jess had what it took, but she had a feeling that one way or another she'd be finding out soon enough and she didn't think Jax could take another heart break like his last. Though he was perfectly grown, she'd never stop looking out for him and Jess Tyler could turn out to be wonderful or she could turn out to be dangerous. Gemma wasn't willing to let time tell on that one.

SOASOASOASOA

Jess pulled into the parking spot next to Lux's in the space below her apartment, her car full of her boxes and a flurry of emotions coursing through her. On the one hand, she knew Rose was sad she was moving out, even though Jess repeatedly reminded her she wasn't going far and promised to come over often, but on the other hand, Jess was relieved to be living with a roommate she didn't have to check in with. She felt like living with Lux was the start of some new adventure she'd only just begun.

She smiled as she looked up at the red brick building. A black metal staircase on the side of the building lead to the top floor, which Clay had remodeled into the apartment, and the wall facing the TM lot had floor to ceiling windows, outside of which was a balcony. Jess finally stepped out of the car, pushing her sunglasses on top of her head as she climbed the staircase and walked inside.

She had expected Tig, Juice, and maybe Jax to come over and help, but it seemed as if half the club had shown up for moving day. Opie, Phil, Miles, and the prospect, Rat, had also turned up for the festivities and everyone was standing around the living room and the kitchen, most with beers in their hands. They all turned when she walked in and she smiled at them all.

"You're here!" Lux said excitedly, bouncing up to Jess and hugging her tightly. Jess laughed and hugged her back.

"I don't have _that_ much stuff, you know," Jess said, motioning to the crowd in the living room. Lux shrugged.

"What can I say, they were all only too eager to help," she said, "I told you, them's my hoes."

"Actually, she pulled the Gemma card on all of us," Opie corrected. Jess spotted Jax leaning against the kitchen counter next to Opie and felt her face heat as she caught his eye, smiling.

"Tomato, tomahto," Lux replied airily to Opie, "There are boxes waiting to be brought up."

"Furniture's here, too," Juice called, glancing out the window to see the large truck pulling in.

Half an hour later, her new bed and dresser lay in pieces on her new bedroom floor as Juice and Tig worked to put it together while the others carried the boxes up from her car. Jess walked into the bedroom to see Juice and Tig putting the finishing touches on her bed and grinned.

"You guys are the best," she said, opening one of the boxes that contained her sheets and comforter.

"No problem," Juice said, grinning and wiping his hands together, "I think that's it then." Jess nodded as Tig and Juice walked out of her bedroom as she threw her sheets and comforter on, smiling. It was starting to feel like home already. She walked back into the living room to see everyone congregated and saw Opie walking through the door with another box in his hands.

"Where do you want it?" Opie asked her. She pointed back to the bedroom.

"Just anywhere in there," she said and Opie nodded, "Was that the last of it?"

"I think so," Opie said as he walked towards her bedroom, "You might want to double check, though." Jess nodded as she walked towards the door, grinning as she saw Jax follow her downstairs. She glanced in the car and the trunk to find that all the boxes had been carried up and Jess leaned into the passenger seat, pulling out a large manila folder from the glove compartment, before standing back up again.

"Well I guess that's everything," she said.

"What's in the folder?" Jax asked. Jess glanced down at the folder in her hands, smiling sadly.

"My entire childhood," she said grimly. Jax nodded, but didn't pry any further, to Jess' relief.

"I guess there's just one last thing to bring up then," he said. She cocked an eyebrow at him, tilting her head in confusion.

"What's that?" she asked. He grinned playfully as he lifted her up, throwing her over his shoulder.

"Jax!" Jess squealed, laughing as he walked her up the stairs, through the living room and past everyone before turning into her bedroom. He laid her down gently on the bed, leaning over her. She looked up at him, smiling in anticipation as he leaned down further, kissing her. She giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck as the kiss grew more intense. Jax moved over her, lying on top of her before her head finally cleared and she put her hands on his chest, pushing him slightly away. He lifted his head.

"What?" he asked.

"There's a room full of people outside," she reminded him. He shrugged.

"They won't mind," he said, grinning. She laughed.

"The door is open," she said.

"Doors can be closed," he replied.

"Jax…" Jess said warningly. He shrugged, rolling off of her.

"It was worth a shot," he said, grinning as he waited for her to stand. She laughed as he slung an arm around her shoulder, leading her back into the living room.

* * *

**_Author's Note: _Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who reviewed! We cannot tell you how much your feedback helps, not to mention makes us smile :) Please continue to let us know what you thought!  
**


	8. Chapter 8

It was almost noon by the time Jess finally pulled herself out of bed. She made her way to the kitchen, flipping the coffee pot on before walking back down the hall, pausing by Lux's room when she heard her shower running. She walked through the bedroom, knocking on the bathroom door and grinning as she heard more than one person slip on the tub.

"What!?" Lux finally called.

"I'm making coffee, you want a cup?" Jess asked through the door.

"Um, sure," Lux responded.

"What about you, Tig?" she called, grinning broadly at the silence that greeted her question. She knew those two thought they were so sneaky. It was several moments later before Tig finally responded.

"Sure," he called back.

"You stupid asshole! Now she knows!" Lux yelled.

"She already knew!" Tig said defensively. Jess laughed as she made her way back to the kitchen and poured three mugs. Lux's door opened several minutes later and Lux walked out, wearing a robe with her hair wrapped in a towel. Tig trailed behind her wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

"So how did you know?" Lux asked, "Was it the sneaking through your window?"

"You guys are pretty obvious," Jess said, "I'm surprised the whole club doesn't- Wait. What did you say?!" She whipped her head to look at Tig, "You sneak in through MY window?" Lux waved her hand dismissively.

"Don't be so dramatic," she said, "He waits until you're asleep." Jess shuddered, glaring at Tig.

"What if I slept naked!?" she asked. Tig shrugged.

"I wouldn't mind," he replied, catching Lux's eye as they both laughed. Jess shook her head.

"You can't use my window anymore. Figure a new way in. Like the front door, maybe," Jess said.

"Nah, they can see the front door from TM," Tig said, "This is… um…. Well, it would be bad if people found out."

"Then you guys had better get a lot better at hiding it," Jess said as she walked over to the fridge, opening it and sighing at the empty contents. She'd been living there for a couple of days now and she still hadn't gone grocery shopping. Her stomach rumbled at her and she placed a hand over it in attempt to placate it, finally deciding she'd have to go grab something.

"It's times like these when I really miss fast food," Jess grumbled as she shut the door, turning back to Lux, "I'm gonna get something to eat. Seeing as how there's no food in the house." Lux nodded as Jess walked back to her bedroom to get dressed and at least attempt to look presentable in public. When she finally passed her own inspection, she made her way out of the front door and down the stairs, glancing over as she saw Jax walk towards her from the TM lot. The usual symptoms suddenly appeared, from the sweaty palms to the rapid heartbeat, and she smiled as he walked up, trying to keep her breathing steady.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey," Jax replied, flashing a grin that only made her think naughty thoughts, "Where're you off to?"

"Lunch," she said, "We have no food." Jax nodded, glancing at his watch.

"Gimme a minute, I'll go with you," he said. Her eyebrows shot up in surprise, her heart practically jumping out of her chest.

"Um, sure," she finally said, "Okay." He grinned, running across the street. She saw him throw a rag into the bay he'd been working out of and grab his cut, sliding it on before getting on his bike. She watched as he revved it up and pulled up next to her, holding out a helmet. She stared at the helmet skeptically for several moments before looking back at him.

"We can just take my car," she suggested hopefully. Jax grinned, shaking his head.

"No way," he said, "Get on." She looked nervously at the helmet before finally shrugging. She took it and climbed on, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"Ready?" he asked.

"I guess," she muttered, and he kicked off. They pulled up to a diner several minutes later and walked inside, sitting across from one another in a booth. Jess picked up the menu in front of her, scanning it quickly.

"So what's good here?" she asked. He raised his eyebrows.

"You haven't been here?" he asked in surprise, "There's only about 4 places to eat in this town." Jess shrugged, shaking her head.

"I haven't really gone to that many places," she said.

"Oh, well… they have a burger," he said, "A burger's a burger." She laughed, nodding as the waitress walked up and took their orders, taking their menus from them.

"So how're you liking Charming so far? Especially now that you've seen the diner," Jax asked, his eyes light with amusement. Jess laughed.

"I really like it here," she said, "I wasn't sure that I would, I've always considered myself more a city girl. But I'm glad I met Lux." Jax chuckled.

"That's a first," he said. Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"She certainly makes life a little more interesting," she said. Jax nodded.

"That she does," he said.

"And I'm glad I met…" Jess began, stopping herself mid-sentence as she looked across at Jax's expectant face, "… other people," she finally finished lamely. Jax grinned, leaning towards her over the table.

"I'm glad I met you, too," he said, his voice low. She smiled, blushing deeply and flicked her eyes from his, trying to find some way to change the course of the conversation.

"So how's Abel?" she asked as the waitress brought their food over, setting it in front of them. Jax thanked her before returning his attention back to Jess.

"He's awesome," Jax said, grinning, "He's so smart. He already knows the entire alphabet and he can write his name and-" Jax paused reaching into his cut and pulling out a folded piece of paper. He unfolded it, showing what looked like red scribbles all over the page, "he drew this for me last night. It's me and him. And I think that's a motorcycle." He looked up at her, shaking his head slightly, "Sorry, I'm rambling about him." Jess shook her head, smiling.

"No, I think it's sweet. It's nice how much you love him," she said, "I would have done anything to have a dad like that." Jax gave her a small smile.

"I'd do anything for that kid," he said, "He's had it pretty rough and he's only 3. Some things I just … can't protect him from." He folded the drawing back and stuck it back in his cut. Jess noticed his knuckles had been scraped up pretty bad, scabs already appearing.

"What happened to your hand?" she asked. Jax frowned, glancing down at the cuts.

"Oh, nothing," he said, "Just busted it when I was working on a car a couple days ago."

"That musta hurt," Jess said. Jax shrugged.

"Nah, it's alright," he said, "I've had worse."

They ate in silence for several minutes while Jess tried her best to analyze the situation before finally giving up. She had no idea what was going on here. Was this a date? Or was this just how Jax was with everyone? Was he just being nice? Did Jax even _do_ dates?

"So you liking living with Lux?" Jax asked, once they'd finished the meal and he'd signaled for the check, "Apart from the empty pantry." Jess nodded.

"It's only been a couple days, but it's been great so far," she said. Jax grinned playfully at her.

"Even with Tig around?" he asked. Jess's eyes widened as she cocked her head slightly at him.

"_You_ know?" she asked. Jax nodded.

"Yeah, they're a bunch of morons," he said, "How Clay hasn't caught on… it's like he's blind to it or something."

"But you… you don't care?" Jess asked. Jax shrugged.

"It's not like I'm a big fan of the situation," he said, "But Lux is… she's not the type of girl anyone can really tell what to do. When you try, she'll go and do something ten times worse. So if the worst thing she's doing is Tig, then I'm okay. And she seems happy, so…" his voice trailed off as he shrugged, Jess nodding in understanding. The waitress set the check on the table and Jess reached for it but Jax stopped her, grinning as he swiped it out of her hand.

"It's on me," he said, throwing several bills on the table and standing up.

"Well, thank you," she said, following him outside, more confused than ever.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jax pulled up to Jess's apartment and she hopped off, handing him the helmet back and unsure what to do next. She stood awkwardly for a moment, debating hugging him, or kissing him, finally deciding on an awkward smile and walking away.

"Hey!" Jax called and Jess turned around, taking a step back towards him. He grabbed her hand, pulling her close to him as he kissed her gently on the lips.

"Awwwwww!" They both heard Lux call and looked up to see her leaning over the balcony watching them, "Aren't you guys cute?" Jax and Jess shook their heads turning back to look at one another.

"Well, I'll see you around," he finally said, kissing her one more time before pulling away from the curb and into the Teller-Morrow lot. She smiled, watching him park his bike before finally walking upstairs.

"So you and Jax? A little lunch date, eh?" Lux asked, grinning broadly as Jess walked into the apartment. Tig, apparently, had already left. Jess sincerely hoped it was through the front door, but she doubted it. She shrugged, walking past Lux.

"You need to get ready for work!" Jess called to her over her shoulder as she went to do the same.

"You're no fun!" Lux called back and Jess laughed.

Two hours later, Jess and Lux walked into Cara Cara for their shifts, heading to the back to put their purses in lockers and check their section assignments. Jess glanced at Lux in confusion when she saw that next to both of their names it said 'VIP.'

"What's that mean?" Jess asked in confusion.

"Very Important Person," Lux replied, grinning. Jess rolled her eyes.

"Ha. Ha," Jess said, "You know what I mean."

"Yeah, it means the VIP room on the second floor. Probably the Sons having a meeting," Lux explained.

"I thought you didn't work whenever they came in?" Jess asked. Lux shrugged.

"It's different with meetings," she said, "They need someone in there they can trust. They just meet here because it's, like, neutral ground." Jess raised her eyebrows.

"You make them sound like a gang," she said, "Like they all have their own territory." Lux laughed nervously.

"Nooo, don't be silly," she said evasively as she walked off. Jess stared at her back for a second before finally running to catch up with her. Lux led them up a set of stairs at the front of the club Jess had never been up before. It opened to a large private room with a small bar off to the side and several tables grouped together. Luann was dragging tables around and glanced up when she heard Lux and Jess walk in.

"Oh thank God you're here," she said, before she began a venting tirade, "You think they could've given more than an hour's notice, but no. They just spring it on me like it's nothing. I need both of you to wait on 'em tonight. Apparently it's a big 'ol party. They just didn't think I would need to know that say, maybe, _yesterday_. What if this room had been booked? Huh? What would they have done then?"

"Luann, you must chill," Lux said, walking over and placing her hands on Luann's shoulders, "Everything'll be fine. Who're they meeting with anyway?"

"Niners," Luann replied. That meant nothing to Jess. Was that another motorcycle club? Luann took several deep breaths before turning to Jess.

"I really appreciate you helping out, too, Jess," she said, "You've really stepped up around here." Jess grinned, shrugging.

"Sure," she said. They helped Luann move several tables around and not long after they finished the Sons filed into the room. Jess saw Jax walk in, but contrary to all the other Sons walking in, he did not look happy. He gave Lux a kiss on the cheek before spotting Jess, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

"I didn't know you were working tonight," he said, leaning over to also give her a kiss on the cheek. She nodded.

"Yeah, Luann said she needed both of us. Said you had a big party," she said. Jax pursed his lips but shrugged, walking over to Clay as 7 or 8 unfamiliar men, all black, walked in. Jess could immediately tell by the lack of cuts on their back that they were not a motorcycle club. The Sons greeted them all and they began to take seats around the tables.

Jax walked up to Clay, stopping him before he sat down, and pulled him off to the side.

"Why is Jess here?" Jax asked him. Clay looked back at him in surprise.

"She's a friend of the club," he replied.

"No, she's a friend of Lux," Jax said, "She doesn't know shit about the club."

"And she's not going to. She's just serving us drinks," Clay said, "Better her than one of the other gashes out there." Jax's nostrils flared slightly as they both took their seats at the table.

Lux and Jess spent several minutes walking back and forth from the bar to the table, making sure everyone had a drink in their hand, before Clay dismissed them, letting them know he'd call if he needed them. Lux and Jess walked outside of the room, closing the door behind them, and Jess looked strangely at Lux.

"What's that meeting all about?" she asked. Lux shrugged.

"I told you, they don't tell me shit," she said, "The One-Niners are just a… group… from Oakland, they're … friends of my dad's. They… get together every now and then." It was obvious that Lux knew more than she was saying and Jess looked unconvinced, beginning to think that the Sons of Anarchy were more than just a bunch of guys that like to talk about bikes.

After the meeting, the Sons and Niners filed out of the meeting, all looking like they were in good spirits. They certainly left an enormously large tip that Lux and Jess gleefully split. Several of them decided to stay and watch the shows and they each took a table as Luann ran up to Lux and Jess again.

"If they're staying, I need you two to take care of them," she said. They nodded, glancing at each other.

"You can take the Sons table," Jess offered.

"Are you sure?" Lux asked. Jess nodded.

"They're your family. And your dad's gone," she said. Lux grinned.

"Okay. You shouldn't have any trouble with the Niners," Lux told her. She pointed one out to her, leaning over, "That's LeRoy. He's their… president, for lack of a better word."

Jess nodded as she headed over to the Niners' table, smiling as she introduced herself and took drink orders. As far as she could tell they all seemed pleasant enough, but she didn't linger too long at the table. LeRoy finally called her over for the check and she dashed to get it, bringing it quickly to the table. As she moved to walk away, LeRoy called back to her.

"You don't hang around much, do you?" he asked, but he was grinning, "Seein' as we're your only table."

"Well I've just figured out by now that with friends of SAMCRO it's probably best not to," she said, smiling back at him. LeRoy laughed, nodding.

"Yeah, that's probably the right mind to be in," he said, "You're a pretty smart girl." Jess grinned, shrugging her shoulders.

"Alright," he said as he threw down a wad of cash that Jess didn't need to count to realize it was hundreds more than the bill asked for, "You'll probably be seeing us around again. Nicer titty bar than any in O-Town." Jess smiled, nodding.

"I hope so," she replied as they filed away. Jess scooped the money up, trying to resist counting it as she walked up to the bar to close out their tab. Lux waved her over from the Sons table, grinning.

"Come have a drink with us," she shouted. Jess nodded, pocketing the tip money along with the rest from the meeting ,and joined them at the table. The only seat available was between Lux and Jax and Jess rolled her eyes at Lux, knowing that wasn't coincidence. Jax grinned over at her as she took the seat, placing his hand casually on her thigh as he turned back to finish his conversation with Opie. Jess looked over to see Lux watching Tig, scowling as he stared fixatedly at the girl currently dancing the pole on the main stage.

"Don't look too hard," she said, "You might see where she had the surgery to get her dick removed." Tig jerked his head toward Lux, looking a little more intrigued than disgusted.

"Seriously?" he asked.

"I just saw her changing one time and… all I'm saying is she's got scars down there that bear a remarkable likeness to those from those dick swapping surgeries," Lux said, shrugging. Jax and Jess both stared at Lux.

What were you doing starin' at her pussy that hard?" Jax asked as, at the same time, Jess asked, "How do you know what gender reassignment scars look like?"

"I saw it on youtube," Lux replied, "Or something." Jess stared at her for a beat, her head cocked to one side, before she shook her head.

"You are so not normal," she said. Jax leaned over towards Jess, grinning.

"Michael Jackson would look normal standing next to Lux," he said quietly. Jess burst out laughing, the memory from that night flooding back to her. Her and Jax, sitting on that picnic table and getting high as kites, laughing until her rib cage hurt. Lux scowled at them, arms crossed.

"That was not that funny," she said and Jess continued laughing hysterically, Jax joining in.

"What are you guys, high?" she asked once they had calmed down, but that only sent Jess back into fits of giggles, Jax grinning next to her.

"Well maybe I'd be more normal if I wasn't surrounded by idiots," Lux said, rolling her eyes at them.

"I'm…sorry," Jess gasped as she wiped her eyes, looking back at Lux.

"I'm assuming that was some inside joke I was not privy to," she said and Jess nodded, causing Lux to grin.

"Oohh you already have inside jokes. That's precious," she said, her smile widening as it was now Jess's turn to scowl at Lux.

"Stop it," she said. Lux shrugged, leaning over towards her.

"So my dad's going on a run Thursday with some of the guys," she said quietly, "So I'm gonna go hang out at the clubhouse."

"I'm guessing Tig's not going on this run?" Jess asked, her voice as low as Lux's and a teasing grin on her face. Lux shook her head.

"Obviously," she said grinning, sitting back up. Jess turned to look at Jax.

"Are you going on the run on Thursday?" she asked. He grinned, slinging an arm around the back of her chair as he shifted his body towards her.

"Nope," he said, "I'll be here. All alone." His face was inches from hers and Jess felt herself blushing, unable to tear herself away from his gaze.

"You should come, too," Lux said loudly to Jess, who finally flicked her eyes away from Jax to look at Lux before turning back to Jax, grinning.

"Yeah, I'll be there," she said.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess couldn't help but look forward to Thursday. She hadn't seen Jax at all since Cara Cara and she was finding most of her thoughts consumed by him in the way only a new crush can. It was almost torture getting through her afternoon shift on Wednesday and by the time 8:00 rolled around she was ready to leave. She walked to the back to get her purse before realizing Luann had told her she wanted to talk to her before she left. Sighing, she closed the locker after grabbing her bag and made her way to Luann's office.

Luann glanced up as she walked in, the phone cradled between her chin and shoulders and relief sweeping over her face as she motioned Jess to walk in. She finished up her phone call and placed it back in the cradle, turning to look at Jess.

"Today is a nightmare," she said, "I've already had three people call in on me. If that phone rings one more time I swear I'm gonna shoot somebody." Jess frowned in commiseration at her as she took a seat on the other side of her desk, praying she didn't ask her to stay late.

"That sucks," she said. Luann nodded before putting a smile on as she looked across at Jess.

"I just wanted to talk to you for a second. Gemma told me she saw Rose Tyler and I had no idea Rose had had a daughter! I used to know her a long time ago," Luann explained. Jess smiled, shaking her head.

"Oh, she's not my mom," Jess said, "She's my aunt." Luann sat back in her chair, studying Jess carefully.

"Ah," she said, "So Daisy is your mother?" Jess shrugged.

"Biologically speaking," she said, "But she gave me up when I was a baby so she never really got around to the mothering part." Luann frowned, leaning over her desk towards Jess.

"So… why weren't you raised here? By Rose? Or your dad?" Luann asked. Jess shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She didn't like to talk about herself much if she could help it, but she found she didn't mind Luann asking so much. The look on her face was caring, rather than curiosity.

"Well, Daisy didn't tell Rose about me," she said, "So she didn't even know I existed until I was about 15, and it was another 3 years before she managed to track me down. As for my dad… I don't know who he is."

"Does Rose know?" Luann asked. Jess shook her head.

"No. I've asked her. I doubt Daisy even knows," Jess said, staring down at her hands. She finally looked up at Luann, surprised to see her eyes misting.

"Would you… would you want to meet your father if you found out who he was?" Luann asked. Jess shrugged.

"I don't know. Probably not," she said, "After Daisy turned out to be such a prize, I don't know if I could go through the disappointment of finding out my dad is some junkie, too." Luann nodded, her lips pursing thoughtfully.

"So you're… what? 24, 25?" she asked. Jess raised her eyebrows in surprise at the question.

"I'm 26," she said.

"26," Luann repeated, "So that's like 1980…?"

"6," Jess filled in for her, "1986." Luann nodded, smiling.

"That's the year before Otto and I got married," she said, her smile turning wistful. Jess smiled back at her.

"You must miss him a lot," she said. Luann nodded sadly.

"I miss him every day," she said, "When people hear he's in prison, they think he must be some monster or something but he's not. He's really not. He's the sweetest man I've ever known. He's the one who gave me the courage to open the club, you know, not to mention the money. He's the best."

"Well if you love him that much, he must be great," Jess said, her heart breaking for Luann all over, as it had done when she had first heard about Otto.

"He is," she said as the phone rang again. Luann glanced at it, annoyed, before picking it up.

"Hello," she said, her face falling in anger as she listened to the other line, "What? No, you cannot do this. I need you here tonight. I'm down girls as it is!" She listened for several moments more before finally slamming the phone in the cradle, glaring at it.

"First Ima calls and says she can't come in for an entire fucking month, and now Lyla's sick!" she said, "I'm gonna have to call a few girls and see if they can come in. This is a disaster – those two are my biggest earners."

"Why isn't Ima coming in for a month?" Jess asked, surprised. She thought back and couldn't remember seeing Ima at all since that morning at the clubhouse.

"Fuck if I know," Luann said in exasperation, "I've been meaning to check on her, but I've just been so busy being here 14 hours out of my day. It's hard to find good help you know."

"I'm off now," Jess said, trying not to sound too disappointed as she offered, "I could go check on her if you want." Luann smiled.

"That'd be great," she said, Jess nodded.

"Yeah, no problem," she said, "I just need her address." Luann nodded as she turned to the filing cabinet behind her, thumbing through the files inside.

"It's in here somewhere," she muttered, finally pulling out a file and copying Ima's address onto a scrap of paper.

"Just… make sure she's okay," she said as she handed Jess the address, "Not doing anything stupid."

Jess nodded, standing from her chair as she made her way to the door of the office.

"Jess," Luann called, and Jess turned, "Thanks." Jess smiled, nodding as she walked out of the office, through the club, and out to her car.

GPS became a completely irrelevant source of technology in Charming. It wasn't hard for Jess to find Ima's apartment and she walked up to it, knocking nervously on the door. The last time Jess had seen Ima, a gun had separated them and she wasn't really looking forward to a repeat performance, but something told her Ima wasn't going to be doing that again.

She waited several moments before she finally heard the lock click and the door opened slowly. Jess's eyes widened as Ima barely stuck her head out of the door, gazing at Jess. Her face was almost completely blue and purple from bruises, she had a black eye, and a bandage across her nose. Jess stared at her in shock for a second before snapping out of it.

"What happened to you?" Jess asked softly. Ima scoffed in derision.

"As if you don't know," she said, "If you just came by to rub it in or repeat the threat – you can let him know: message received."

Jess's heart sank low in her chest, recalling Jax's banged up knuckles, as she asked the question to which she really didn't want to know the answer, "Let… who know?"

"Who else? Jax," Ima said, confirming what Jess had known as she stepped back from the door, allowing Jess to walk through. She glanced around Ima's apartment, biting her lip to avoid cringing. It was a complete mess and smelled as if the trash hadn't been taken out in weeks. She looked at Ima's defeated expression as she slumped on a bar stool by the kitchen.

"How long has it been since you've left your apartment?" she asked.

"I can't leave!" Ima yelled, "If anyone saw me… I don't want anyone's pity. And honestly, where the fuck would I go."

Jess looked at Ima, at how depressed she was, and felt a hint of guilt creeping into her. She felt partially responsible. She knew Ima hadn't meant to fire the gun, and most likely wouldn't have if Jess hadn't tried to take it from her. She knew that was why Jax had done this to her and it made her sick to her stomach to think about.

"I'm sorry this happened to you," she said, her voice barely a whisper. Ima shrugged.

"I shouldn't have pulled a gun at the clubhouse," she said, turning to pour a shot of whiskey out of the bottle on the counter behind her, "Shoulda known better."

"Yeah, but you didn't deserve… this," Jess replied, "No one deserves that." Ima smirked, taking the shot before looking back at Jess.

"You clearly don't know how SAMCRO works," she said. Jess gnawed on her lip, nodding.

"Yeah," she admitted, "I guess I don't." Ima shrugged, pouring another shot.

"You should get out of town for a couple weeks," Jess suggested, "Clear your head. It's not good for you to be cooped up in this apartment until you heal."

"Yeah, maybe," Ima said vaguely. Jess nodded, feeling as if their conversation was over, and turned to walk towards the door.

"You know," Ima called after her, and Jess turned to look at her, a sad expression on Ima's face, "the worst part wasn't getting my face bashed into a mirror. The worst part was him spitting in my face and calling me a whore." Jess's lips tightened as she looked back at Ima before turning around, feeling as if she was in shock all over again. She paused by the front door, dropping a couple hundred of her tip money out of her bag on the table by the door.

"That should help you get out of town for a little while," she said, her head turned slightly but her back still towards Ima, and she walked out of the apartment before Ima could protest.

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_**Author's Note: **_**We really hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and again, please please let us know what you thought of this chapter. Your feedback is so important to us! **


	9. Chapter 9

Jess walked straight to her bedroom after getting home from Ima's, thankful Lux wasn't home. She had so many thoughts swarming through her head and she needed some time to herself to sort through them all. She lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling, Ima's black and blue face pictured in her mind. She hated knowing that Jax had been the one to do that to her and wondered, grimly, if he was capable of that, what else was he capable of?

If she was honest with herself, she had known for a while that Jax and the others weren't all they seemed. But her crush on Jax had allowed her to ignore all the parts of herself that had been warning her and instead she'd taken everything they told her at face value. They were mechanics who liked bikes and got together on occasion with other groups who may or may not be gang related. She realized she'd _wanted _to remain blissfully ignorant, but Jax had now shown his hand and forced her to look deeper; forced her to see everything that had been right in front of her face.

She rolled over on the bed, remembering the night she'd really fallen for Jax. The night he became something to her other than a hot body and a pretty face. It was their last night together, laughing hysterically on the picnic tables, talking all night about his family, about her past, watching the sunrise from the roof. She had felt like she was 16 again; just a girl with a crush on a boy. She couldn't remember ever having a better night. Until the next morning, when Ima pulled that damn gun out of her purse and it felt as if everything had changed since then. She now felt like she didn't know Jax at all.

She recalled the mug shot wall at the clubhouse, finally allowing herself to wonder what they'd all been to prison for, and as different theories and ideas flooded her brain, she finally fell into an uneasy sleep.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess awoke the next morning feeling as if she hadn't slept at all. It took her a moment to recall the reason for her bad sleep and she shot up in bed as she remembered. She quickly crawled out of bed, throwing clothes on and rushing out the door. Item number one on her agenda for the day was to get some answers from the only person she knew that wouldn't lie to her.

She pulled up to Rose's house, quickly walking up the drive and unlocking the front door with the key Rose had insisted she keep. She walked into the kitchen to see her aunt reading the paper and sipping on a cup of coffee, glancing up as she walked in.

"Jess!" she said happily, standing up and giving her a hug, "Well this is a nice surprise. Do you want a cup of coffee?" Jess nodded gratefully as she took a seat at the table while Rose brought her a warm mug. Jess took a sip of it as she glanced across the table at her aunt, who was watching her worriedly.

"You seem a little down about something," Rose finally said. Jess set the mug down, shrugging as she looked back at Rose, wondering where to start.

"It's a guy," she finally said. Rose nodded knowingly, sitting back in her chair.

"You want to talk about it?" Rose asked. Jess nodded, sighing.

"How much do you know about SAMCRO?" she asked.

"Ah," Rose replied, "So this guy is a Son?" Jess nodded.

"Jax Teller," she told her. Rose raised her eyebrows.

"Gemma's boy?" she asked, "No wonder she was being so nosy." Jess gave her a small smile before staring down at the mug in front of her.

"I just don't know what I've gotten myself into," she said, "All I know is I was stupid to believe Lux when she told me they were just a bunch of mechanics." Rose nodded sympathetically.

"Well, don't be too hard on Lux," Rose said, "I'm sure that girl's had to carry secrets around that would overwhelm most of us."

"Secrets about what?" Jess asked desperately. Rose shrugged.

"I couldn't even begin to imagine," she said, shaking her head, "Now I'm not telling you Jax isn't a good person or that you shouldn't be with him if it's what your heart wants, but I am telling you to be careful. He's… done some bad things."

"What kinds of things?" Jess asked.

"Well, I only know what's public knowledge and what's rumors," she said, "No one without a cut really knows the whole truth."

"So what's the public knowledge?" she asked anxiously. Rose looked thoughtful for a moment, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Well, him and a couple of the other guys were arrested a few years back. Did some time for gun running and smuggling. They had a hard time proving it in court, something about searching without a warrant got a bunch of stuff thrown out, which was why his sentence was so lenient. Only did a couple years. It was pretty big news, seeing as how nothing ever happens in this town, so we were all following it pretty closely, but I don't know any more than that about it. Could've been a one-time thing and he just got caught… but I doubt it," Rose finished, looking back at Jess who was still processing the information. Smuggling? _Running guns? _She didn't know what she'd expected, but it wasn't that.

"What should I do?" she finally asked.

"I can't tell you that," Rose said, "All I can tell you is whatever you decide, you be careful. You could get in over your head before you even realize it." Jess sighed, feeling more conflicted now than when she got there, wondering what advice Rose would be giving her if she told her about Ima and her black and blue face.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess stayed at her aunt's house for several hours before finally driving back to the apartment. She walked inside, changing quickly to go for a run and hoping that would help clear out the jumble of information, thoughts, and feelings filling up her head. She grabbed her iPod and took off, running down back roads and through neighborhoods in an attempt to avoid certain people.

She thought about what her aunt had told her and tried to understand how she felt about it. Did she believe, as her aunt suggested as a possibility, that it had been a one-time thing? No. She was pretty sure that if he had been running guns 6 or 7 years ago, there was a good chance he was still doing it. She thought about the meeting with the Niners, now convinced that the Niners were a gang from Oakland, but it wouldn't take much more than a google search to find out for sure. Had they been meeting about guns? Were the Sons trying to sell to them? By the satisfied looks on all their faces as they left the meeting, a good deal had obviously taken place.

But she didn't think any of this would bother her so much if she hadn't seen Ima's face. She could take Jax's arrest record – she'd already known he'd been arrested in the past by his inclusion in the mug shot wall, and it wasn't as if Jess had never broken the law. It was sometimes pertinent to survival when you were a foster kid. But she couldn't take the thought that he would hurt someone half his size like that, no matter the reason. That act alone had her rethinking everything she thought she knew about him.

She had no idea how long she'd been running, but the sun was starting to set by the time she got back to the apartment. The only sign of Lux was a note left on the counter that read '_Where the hell are you?'_ Jess took the note before walking back to her bedroom and checking her phone, seeing several missed calls from Lux as well.

And then she remembered. Today was Thursday. She was supposed to go over to the clubhouse, but the thought of seeing everyone, especially Jax, right now was intolerable. She needed more time to work things out. She sighed, grabbing her phone and making her way into the living room to watch TV and get out of her head for a little while.

There was a knock on the door sometime in the middle of a _Dance Moms _marathon and Jess glanced up at the door, instinctively knowing who it was. She shut the TV off, hoping he would just leave, but she should've known better. He knocked again, harder this time and Jess sighed, standing up and answering the door.

"Hey," Jax said, a worried expression on his face.

"Hey," Jess said shortly. She stared down at her feet, not wanting to look into his blue eyes, and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"I saw your car downstairs," Jax explained, "Lux said you hadn't been answering her calls; I just wanted to make sure everything was okay." Jess nodded.

"I'm fine, I just… didn't feel like coming over tonight," she said, hoping that would be enough for him and he would leave. She just needed some time to herself to think. Jax stared at her for a minute, at the way she wouldn't make eye contact with him and how she hadn't yet stepped back from the door to allow him inside.

"Didn't feel like going over there or didn't feel like seeing me?" he eventually asked. Jess flicked her eyes briefly to his but glanced away quickly, shrugging.

"Jess, what's going on?" Jax asked, an edge to his voice. Jess shrugged again, leaning against the door frame.

"Nothing," she said, but Jax still didn't leave. She sighed, looking everywhere but at him, "I just… talked to my aunt. Heard some things I didn't know before." She heard Jax's breath hitch and it took him a second to respond.

"Things like what?" he asked. She finally raised her eyes to meet his, and was startled to see him looking so angry.

"Things like you were arrested for smuggling guns," she said.

"Fuck," he hissed, turning around and leaning against the railing of the stairway. When he turned back to her, his face was pained and his eyes narrowed.

"I just need time to process everything," Jess said, "I'm just not sure how I feel about it right now."

"How you _feel_? About an arrest from 8 years ago?" he asked, his voice full of anger and frustration.

"Oh, so you haven't done it since then?" Jess asked, her voice full with sarcasm. She was tired of being lied to. She just wanted to know the truth. And from his silence, she felt like she'd finally found some.

"I saw Ima yesterday, too," Jess added, feeling if she was laying down one thing, she might as well lay it all down, "How do I know you won't do that to me one day?" She could see Jax's eyes blazing as he looked at her, his nostrils flaring.

"Part of the reason I did that was FOR you!" Jax bellowed at her, slamming his hand against the metal railing, "Because I was scared she was going to hurt YOU!"

"That scares me even more!" Jess yelled back, "I don't want you to hurt people for _me_. And we both know Ima wouldn't have fired that gun if I hadn't been stupid enough to try and take it from her."

"This is my life, Jess!" Jax shouted in finality, his arms outspread, "I don't know what to tell you. Either you can handle it or you can't." Jess shook her head, tears beginning to streak down her cheeks. She didn't want this to be the end of it. She just wanted more time to think.

"Did you think I would never find out?" Jess asked , her voice full of fury and desperation, "Jesus, the whole town at least knows about your arrest!"

"I didn't think it was anything you needed to know!" Jax yelled, "And honestly, I didn't think you'd be able to handle it. Obviously I was right."

"Yeah, nothing gets by you, does it?" Jess asked, spite filling her voice, "Guess you got me all figured out there. Maybe if all of this hadn't been sprung on me, maybe if you hadn't felt the need to bash Ima's face into a mirror-"

"None of that concerns **you**!" Jax screamed, interrupting her, his anger finally overcoming him as he banged his fist roughly against the doorframe.

"Fuck you!" Jess screamed back before slamming the door in his face, taking several steps backwards as she stared at it, tears now streaming down her cheeks.

Jax punched the door in angry frustration, breathing heavily as he turned away, running down the stairs. He couldn't remember ever being this furious, but mostly he was angry at himself. He should have known it would go down like this. He knew before it started that Jess wasn't the type of girl he should involve himself with. She wasn't the type of girl that would ever be able to accept him, accept the life he led, and he had no business bringing her down with him. But for so many reasons, he had found himself undeniably attracted and drawn to her and knew he couldn't have stayed away if he'd tried.

'_It's probably better this way_,' he thought as he walked straight to his bike parked in the TM lot. Over before it began. If an 8 year old arrest and a thing like Ima were going to send her running, it was best he know now.

He hopped on his bike and drove straight to his house, barely acknowledging the SUV parked in his driveway as he strode inside. Only upon entering did he realize Tara was sitting on the floor with Abel, playing with some toy cars. Abel looked up excitedly when he heard the door open and hopped up, running to Jax and throwing his arms around his legs, Tara smiling at the scene. It was amazing the power a 3 year old could have to ebb his anger away.

"Hey, buddy," Jax said, smiling at the child as he lifted him up and carried him back into the living room, smiling down at Tara. Tara, who had run off on him, but who always came back. Tara, who had been trying for months to be a family again, even knowing everything she knew about him.

He took a seat on the floor next to her, setting Abel down who picked up a toy car and held it out to Jax. Jax took it, grinning as he ran it along the floor.

"I guess I'll go now, since you're back," Tara said, tentatively rising from her place on the floor. Jax turned to look up at her, his fight with Jess running through his mind, and he shook his head.

"No, stay," he said. Tara looked back at him for a moment before smiling, nodding, and taking her place back on the floor. Abel handed her a toy car as well before ramming his toy car into theirs. Jax grinned over at Tara as Abel made exploding noises due to the car accidents he'd just caused and Tara laughed.

"This is nice," Tara said. Jax turned to her, nodding.

"Yeah, it is," he said as she leaned against him and they watched Abel play.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Sunlight streamed through Jess's window Saturday morning, causing her to roll over and groan, reminding herself she needed to get curtains. She sat up, rubbing her eyes, and leaned back against her headboard, her knees pulled into her chest. She'd spent the entirety of the day before in her room, calling in sick to work so she could stay home and feel miserable. It had now been two days since the heated argument between her and Jax and part of her knew things were for the best, but the other part of her couldn't eat, sleep, or stop crying. The only times she'd even gotten out of bed had been to use the bathroom.

There was a knock on her door and Jess stared at it, but couldn't bring herself to respond or open it.

"Jess?" Lux called through the door, "Just… let me know you're still alive in there, okay? I'm really worried about you."

"I'm alive," Jess said, grasping her throat as her words came out croaky and hoarse from not being used.

"Okay…" Lux said, "Is there anything you want to talk about?"

"No," Jess said, surprised and grateful that Lux wasn't barging into her room demanding answers. Jess finally heard Lux's footsteps retreat and lay down in bed again, curled in a ball and grasping a pillow.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

When Jess awoke the next morning, she felt immensely better. She'd given herself two days to mope and be miserable and that was more than enough time to mourn a relationship that had ended before it'd even began. She was on the schedule at Cara Cara that day and refused to let herself miss another shift, so she crawled out of bed, walking down to the kitchen to start the coffee pot. She soon heard Lux's door fling open.

"Jess?" she heard her call, her voice full of surprise, before she ran down the hall to the kitchen, her face breaking out into a smile when she saw her. Lux wrapped her arms around Jess, embracing her tightly.

"What the hell has been the matter with you?" she asked once she'd finally stepped away. Jess shrugged, pouring a mug of coffee and sipping on it as she looked back at Lux over the mug.

"I don't really want to talk about it yet, if that's okay," she said. Lux stared back at her, obviously wanting to tell her it was most definitely not okay, but she finally nodded.

"Yeah, okay," she said, "But you really had me worried. I haven't even seen you in like… three days." Jess nodded.

"I know. I'm sorry," she said, "I just needed some time."

"But you're okay now?" Lux asked.

"I'm… getting there," Jess said. Lux nodded, glancing down the hall and grinning, waving at someone. Jess leaned over to see Tig walking down the hall toward Jess's room.

"Fuck, is he still using my window?" Jess asked. Lux shrugged.

"Well now that you're back in the world of the living," she said, turning back to Jess as she poured herself a mug of coffee, pointing to the balcony in a silent request to sit outside, "He's been having to use a ladder and sneak through the living room window. It's been difficult." Jess rolled her eyes as she followed Lux out to the balcony, sitting down on the chairs outside.

"You guys are really terrible at sneaking around," Jess said after they'd gotten settled outside, "Even Jax knows." Jess winced as she spoke his name and Lux's eyes widened as she slowly lowered her mug from her lips.

"Fuck, Jax knows?" Lux asked. Jess nodded and Lux sighed, shaking her head, "Whatever. As long as my dad doesn't know."

"So… is this just a sex thing between you guys or do you actually like him?" Jess asked, her morbid curiosity finally getting the better of her. And the more she wasn't talking about Jax, the better. Lux shrugged, sipping her coffee.

"I mean, it started out as just a sex thing," she said, "Back when I was- well, it was a weird time in my life. I was pretty much trying to destroy all the relationships in my life and that was my way to ruin my relationship with my dad. Tig was pretty hard to get at first, but you know I like a challenge." Lux grinned, shaking her head before she continued, "Anyway, I thought it'd be a one-time thing, but it just kept happening after that. And now we really care about each other and don't know what to do about it."

"You can't hide it from your dad forever," Jess told her, "You need to tell him before he finds out some other way." Lux nodded, looking as if she was going to respond, before she looked between the thick railing of the balcony and her eyes widened.

"Yeah, you're probably right," she said quickly, standing up, "We should go inside."

"Why?" Jess asked confused.

"It's hot," Lux replied.

"It's 75 degrees," Jess said.

"Maybe I have a fever then. You should come inside and help me check my temperature," Lux said desperately.

Jess looked at Lux strangely before she turned her head to look through the railing to see what had spooked Lux and saw Tara stepping out of her car in the TM lot. Jess stood, leaning against the railing to see better and Lux sighed, finally walking over to stand next to her. Jess glanced around the lot and her heart restricted as she saw Jax for the first time, their argument and the pain and anger on his face flooded back to her as if it had just happened. She continued to watch him as he walked over to Tara and her eyes widened, her heart ripping in two as she watched him pull her close to him, kissing her intimately. She finally looked over at Lux, who had a guilty expression on her face.

"Did you know?" Jess whispered. Lux sighed.

"I'm so sorry, Jess," she said, "You were being all emo locked up in your room, I didn't know how to tell you. And then I thought maybe you knew and that was why you were being all emo." Jess nodded, turning away from the display and walking back into the kitchen.

"Believe me, I'm so pissed about it," Lux continued as she followed her inside, "I know he cares about you! I don't know what he was thinking." Jess sighed, taking a seat on one of the barstools in the kitchen.

"I do," Jess said, causing Lux to stare at her blankly for several seconds before finally asking, "What?"

"We… talked the other night," she said, "And he didn't like how it went." Lux nodded, slipping onto the stool next to her, her eyes never leaving Jess's.

"Is that why you were shut up in your room?" she asked. Jess shrugged, "What was the talk about?"

Jess looked back at Lux, wondering if she about to lose a friend when she'd already lost Jax. Would Lux feel like she needed to take sides once she heard the whole story? Would Jess's inability to accept the club 100% feel like a betrayal to her?

"I, uh, I found out SAMCRO is a little more than just a group of guys who sit around and talk about bikes," Jess finally said. Lux's face fell, a guilty expression forming on her face.

"I'm sor-" she started, but Jess cut her off.

"I know you couldn't tell me," she said, "I'm not made about that. I just needed to figure out if I could handle being with someone with that kind of lifestyle. Jax and I argued about it before he pretty much decided for me and ran off… apparently right into Tara's arms." Lux frowned, her eyebrows creased as she watched Jess carefully.

"So… you're okay now?" Lux asked. Jess shrugged.

"I'll be fine," she said, trying to convince herself as much as Lux, "I mean, I'm not gonna lie. I really miss him and I still have….feelings for him. But it's better this way." Lux nodded, but it was clear Jess had not managed to convince either of them.

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_**Author's Note: **_**Thank you so so so much to everyone who reviewed our last chapter! I hope this chapter didn't make you too mad (or do I?) but this story is very, very far from over! **

**Just a reminder, we have enough material to feel comfortable updating once a week and know we can keep up with that. The thing that really motivates us the most to write more is your reviews, and because of that we decided that on top of our weekly updates, if we get good feedback we'll also post an additional chapter on Wednesday! So if you've got a second, we'd really appreciate a review! Let us know what you loved, what you didn't, or what you think is going to happen! We love hearing your thoughts! **


	10. Chapter 10

_**Author's Note: Oh. My. God. **_**That's pretty much what we were saying all weekend. To say that we were thrilled with the response from the last chapter would be an understatement. Ecstatic might be a better word. To all 19 of you who reviewed, we want to say THANK YOU for making our day – pretty sure both of us had permanent smiles plastered on our face all of yesterday and Sunday and I can't tell you how much we appreciate all the feedback and notes we got. You're all sooo WONDERFUL! We work hard on this story and we're just so excited that so many of you are liking the Jess and Jax saga. **

**I was so excited in fact that I got about 3 chapters finished over the weekend when I was supposed to be studying for the GRE. So thanks for that! **

**We wanted to give you something for being so totally awesome, but we don't have anything else to give except this chapter a day early so here you go and I hope you enjoy this one as much!**

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Luann walked purposefully up to Gemma's house, needing to have the talk with her that she couldn't put off any longer. Her mind had been on little else than what had been revealed to her during her and Jess's conversation the week before, but she hadn't seen Jess since and she wasn't really sure if she should tell her what Luann was sure she now knew.

She rapped anxiously on the door, waiting for Gemma to finally open it. Luann smiled at her friend as Gemma stepped back to allow Luann in and she walked straight for the table in the kitchen, sitting down.

"Well this is a nice surprise," Gemma said, joining her at the table and looking at Luann.

"I needed to talk to you," she said. Gemma nodded.

"I gathered," she replied. Luann took a deep breath, gazing back at Gemma for several moments.

"What do you know about Jess?" Luann finally asked. Gemma looked at her appraisingly, deducing where this conversation was headed.

"I know she's Daisy Tyler's kid," Gemma said, her head cocked, "I assume you do, too, now." Luann nodded, leaning over the table toward Gemma.

"You know as well as I do what that means, Gem," Luann said, "The timeline fits. The girl's 26 years old and who else was Daisy doing 26 years ago? Whore barely ever left the clubhouse until she just disappeared, probably when she got knocked up." Gemma nodded, sighing.

"Yeah, I figured as much as well," she said, looking back at Luann.

"Gemma, she's gotta be the daughter of a Son," Luann said, "And that makes that girl family."

"She might not even want a family," Gemma said, and Luann scoffed.

"Please," Luann said, "That girl's been crying for one since the day she was born." Gemma shrugged.

"So what? We go do a DNA test on the girl? Play 'who's your daddy' like we're Maury fucking Povich?" she asked sarcastically.

"Yes!" Luann replied, "That's exactly what we do. We can get one of those over the counter things. They got 'em down at the drugstore." Gemma stared back at her for a second before shrugging. She didn't have anything else going on at the moment.

"Alright," she finally assented, "Let's go talk to her." Luann nodded gratefully and stood as she followed Gemma out the door.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess and Lux sat in the kitchen eating lunch before they would have to leave for their shift at Cara Cara when there was a knock on the door. Jess glanced at Lux, her heart thumping as she feared who was behind it.

"You get it," she said and Lux rolled her eyes, standing up to answer the door. She raised her eyebrows in surprise when she saw Gemma and Luann standing there, and she stood back to let them in.

"Mom, hey," Lux said, glancing between her and Luann, "I was just about to leave for work. What are you doing here?" Gemma smiled, kissing Lux on the forehead.

"We're not here to talk to you," she said, her eyes landing on Jess, who was still sitting in the kitchen. Lux turned to Jess with wide eyes and shook her head as Jess rose from the barstool, walking into the living room.

"I'm sorry for whatever is about to happen to you but I'm out of here," Lux said, grabbing her bag off the couch and running out the door. Jess turned to Luann, the look on her face making her nervous.

"Am I about to get fired?" she asked, her eyes flicking to Gemma, "Or killed?"

"Have a seat, Jess," Gemma said, motioning to the couch and Jess sighed.

"Oh God, I am about to get killed," she muttered, sitting down on the couch and looking at Luann and Gemma.

"We need to talk to you about something," Luann said kindly, taking a seat next to Jess on the couch as Gemma sat in the recliner opposite them.

"We don't know if you knew this," Gemma started, "but we knew your mother before you were born." Jess shook her head.

"Daisy is not my mom," Jess replied, "My mom died." Gemma and Luann exchanged glances before returning their gaze to Jess.

"Well, whatever the case may be, we don't know if you were aware that Daisy was a … well, she hung around the clubhouse, a lot," Luann said, having a hard time telling the poor girl her mom was a club pass around.

"Including around the time you were conceived," Gemma added, "Right before she dropped off the face of the earth." Jess looked between the two, dawning comprehension coming over her but not wanting to get to their conclusion any faster.

"Okay," she said, scooting away from Luann on the couch and curling her legs underneath her, not sure if she wanted them to drop the bomb she knew they were about to.

"Well, we're pretty certain that your father is, or was, in the club," Gemma finished, never one to beat around the bush. Jess looked between the two of them, her heart thumping in her chest.

She'd given a lot of thought over the years as to who her father might be. When she was a kid, she imagined him as an international spy who couldn't come get her because he was busy protecting their country. Then maybe an army hero, who died in the line of duty. As she got older and found out who Daisy was, the fantasies became harder to entertain and she assumed her dad was probably some nameless drug dealer. She'd since gotten comfortable with the fact that she may never know who her father was.

And now Gemma and Luann sat there, staring at her, telling her they'd narrowed down all the possible suspects to a select few and that he was almost certainly a member of the very club she had just decided to distance herself from.

"Is this a joke?" Jess finally asked, looking at Gemma.

"I don't joke," Gemma told her seriously.

"Why are you telling me this?" Jess asked.

"Do you want to know who your father is?" Gemma asked. Jess immediately shook her head, her first reaction being a resounding NO. Luann reached over, rubbing her arm gently.

"Sweetie, we can find out. You can finally know your dad," she said, her voice full of sympathy. Jess sat back, drawing her knees up to her chest as she thought about all the guys she knew in the club that would be the right age. There weren't many options left and she finally looked over at Luann.

"Well what if it's someone that's not around anymore?" she asked. Luann gave her a smile and a small shrug.

"Then you're no worse off than you are now, are you?" she asked, "But I don't think it is."

"Who do you think it is?" Jess asked, her voice a whisper.

"Well… there are several… possibilities," Luann said.

"Your mom got around," Gemma added, and Luann glared at her. Jess's eyes widened as she ran down the suspects again and jerked her head back to them.

"It couldn't be Tig, right?" she asked desperately. Gemma shook her head.

"Oh, no," she said, "He wasn't around then." Jess breathed a sigh of relief until she cocked her head at Gemma.

"Or Clay?" she asked. Gemma shook her head firmly.

"Oh hell no," she said. Jess's eyes widened as an even more awful possibility occurred to her that made bile rise in her throat.

"Oh God," she moaned, "It couldn't be… not Jax's dad?" Her heart thumped in her chest as she looked between the two, her shoulders finally sagging when Gemma shook her head.

"No, don't worry about that," Gemma told her, "John had already passed before you were born." Jess breathed a sigh of relief, now understanding the importance of finding out who her dad was. The thought of accidentally sleeping with her brother made her shudder.

"Okay, then who could it be?" she asked. Luann took her hand in hers, her eyes studying Jess's face.

"I think…" she started, "I think there's a good possibility it's Otto." Jess's eyes widened as she looked back at Luann.

"And… and if it was?" Jess asked meekly, "What would happen if it was Otto?" Luann scooted closer to her, Jess's hand still clasped firmly in hers.

"From the moment I met you, Jess, you've been nothing but a hard worker and a sweet girl," Luann said, looking directly at Jess, "And I would be proud to consider you a daughter."

"Well… step-daughter," Jess mumbled, looking down. Luann gripped her chin gently, pulling her face back up to look at her.

"No, a daughter," she said firmly. Jess gazed at her for several seconds, feeling her eyes brimming with tears as Luann dropped her hand from Jess's chin.

"Okay," Jess said, "You can do the test." Gemma stood, smiling broadly as she walked over to Jess.

"Great! All we need is this," she said as she yanked several hairs out of Jess's head.

"Ow!" Jess yelled, rubbing the back of her head as she frowned at Gemma. She watched as Gemma pulled a plastic baggie out of her purse and shoved the hair in there.

"You came prepared," Jess commented.

"I don't do things any other way," Gemma replied simply, smiling at her as Luann stood up, looking back at her.

"Is it okay if I come in a few hours late today?" Jess said, "I'm not really up for it right now." Luann nodded, hugging Jess.

"Take the day if you need it," she said, "We can manage without you." Jess nodded, giving Luann a small smile as she walked them to the door, shutting it behind them and leaning back against the door. If ever she needed to go on a run, it was now.

She got changed quickly and took off running, heading towards a park she'd been to a couple times before. Several joggers were out that day and as she ran around the trail she allowed her mind to drift back to who her dad might be. Of those still around, the pickings were slim. It had to be either Otto, Bobby, or Piney. She knew Opie was the same age as Jax, making him about 6 years older than her, and Piney had been married when Opie was born, but she wasn't sure how faithful Piney had been or if he'd even still been married by the time Jess came along. The thought of Piney being her father made her grimace. What if Opie had been the one she'd slept with, instead of Jax? She shook her head, shuddering at the thought.

She didn't know much about Bobby, except for his baking skills which, if she was his daughter, she had most certainly not inherited. But she thought about what Rose had told her about Bobby – how she had been with him a lot during that time, which made Jess doubt that it was Bobby.

That left Otto. She didn't know how she felt about Otto as a possibility. On the one hand, she loved Luann and would love nothing more than to be accepted as a member of her family. On the other hand, Otto was serving a life sentence in prison, making the whole 'getting to know her father' thing obsolete. Not to mention, she was sure he was serving a life sentence for something much worse than gun running or bashing a girl's face in. How could she possibly reconcile that?

She continued running, these thoughts swirling through her brain, as she noticed another jogger keeping time with her. She glanced over at him and he smiled at her. He was cute, in the completely anti-Jax way. With his short brown hair and kind eyes, he was about as far from outlaw biker as you could get. She grinned back, picking up her pace to run ahead of him, rolling her eyes as he shot past her. She was already running well past her normal speed, but this had turned into a competition. She ran faster, practically sprinting now as she shot past him and she felt him speeding up behind her.

She looked over at him, grinning, as they both broke out into a full blown sprint until he finally fell back, keeling over.

"Alright, I give up!" he called after her, "You win!" She grinned, jogging backwards to look at him.

"See you around then!" she said, turning back and continuing on her run.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess sat on the couch at the apartment several days later, her anxiety as high as it had been for the past few days. Luann had told her that Gemma had sent the tests in, and she should expect the results in about a week. The news made her incredibly anxious. One part of her wanted to know right now. The other part of her hoped the results got lost in the mail.

She hadn't yet told Rose about Gemma and Luann's little experiment. She knew that if Gemma and Luann had picked up on the strong possibility that her dad was a Son, then Rose most definitely had. Hadn't Rose told her she and Daisy used to go to the clubhouse together? She must have had some reason to not tell Jess and she wasn't sure how her aunt would feel about Gemma and Luann taking the matter into their own hands.

Lux walked into the living room, sitting next to Jess on the couch and guessing correctly about why Jess had the strange look on her face that she did.

"The results aren't gonna be back for a while, Jess. You can't just sit around and wait," she said, "Come over to the clubhouse and get a beer." Jess shook her head.

"I don't really want to hang out over there," Jess sighed.

"Why?" Lux asked, "Tara's not gonna be there."

"I don't really want to be around Jax right now," she said, "Especially not somewhere he's got the upper hand."

She knew that the words and actions that had taken place on the doorstep of her apartment would not have been tolerated at the clubhouse, but she didn't know what he would've done about it if they had been there instead of at her apartment. All she knew was that you feel the power shift the second you walked through those doors.

"If you're still upset about him getting back together with Tara-" Lux said, but Jess cut her off.

"It's not about that," she mumbled, "Well… not completely anyway."

"Then what is it?" Lux asked. Jess sighed. She really didn't want to tell Lux about Jax hitting Ima and how that made her scared to be around him. She had a strong feeling Lux would take Jax's side when it came to him vs. Ima, and that Lux wouldn't understand Jess's feelings about it, so she remained silent.

"What? Is it about them getting arrested?" Lux asked in frustration, "You think we're trash now? Do you not want to be my friend anymore?" Jess jerked her head over to look at Lux, shaking her head quickly.

"No, of course I don't think that," she tried to reassure her. Lux frowned.

"Then what is it?" she asked. Jess took a deep breath, not seeing any way around it now.

"I went to go check on Ima for Luann a few days ago," Jess began, but Lux cut her off.

"Ooohh," she said in understanding, a sly grin spreading across her face. Jess looked at her curiously as Lux asked, "What does she look like?" Jess raised her eyebrows, surprised at Lux's knowledge of what went down.

"She looks like she got the shit beat out of her," Jess said and Lux snorted in amusement. Jess scowled at her, shaking her head.

"It's not funny," she told her. Lux wiped the grin off her face, shrugging as she looked at Jess.

"He did that because she put people he cares about in danger," Lux told her, reiterating what Jax had said to her as if this made everything okay, "Me and mom and Abel and you."

"No one deserves to have that happen to them," Jess insisted.

"It's fucking _Ima_," Lux said, "Are you really not gonna come to the clubhouse ever again because of Ima? It's not like stuff like that happens all the time." Jess raised her eyebrows doubtfully as Lux shook her head.

"They're not a bunch of women beaters, Jess," Lux told her, "Quite the opposite actually. But when someone threatens Jax's family, whoever it is, he sees red. Honestly, I think it's one of his better qualities." Jess still didn't look convinced so Lux rolled her eyes, grabbing her cell phone and dialing Jax's number.

"Hey, you at the clubhouse?" Lux asked as he picked up.

"No, I'm at home," Jax responded, "Why?"

"No reason, thanks love you bye," Lux said quickly as she hung up on him. She turned back to Jess.

"Jax isn't even there, he's at his house," Lux told her. Jess sighed, shrugging.

"Okay, fine, I'll go," she said. Lux grinned, hopping off the couch gleefully as Jess followed her.

"Do you ever not get your way?" Jess asked.

"Not often," Lux replied, grinning broadly as they walked across the street to the clubhouse.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax stared down at the phone in his hand as his sister hung up on him, frowning at it. He knew Lux too well not to know why she called to ask him if he was at the clubhouse; or rather, to make sure he _wasn't_ at the clubhouse. She was bringing Jess over and Jess wouldn't go if he was there.

He sighed, leaning back in his chair at the dining room table, trying to ignore his desire to run over there and see her. He hadn't seen her since their fight, but a recent conversation with his mom let him know that Jess's world had recently flipped upside down and he wondered where her head was at towards the club now that it was a good possibility she had SAMCRO in her blood.

He glanced down the hall where he knew Tara was before shaking his head, rubbing his eyes. He'd made his decision. Tara was the right choice. She loved Abel, and Jax needed to start thinking of him. Tara was a good mother for him. But there was a distance between him and Tara now that he wasn't sure could ever be bridged. He hoped that in time, their relationship could be back to what it was, but try as he might, he couldn't get Jess out of his fucking head. He sighed, grabbing the keys to his bike before heading down the hall, standing in the doorway of Abel's bedroom to see them playing on the floor.

"I'm gonna go over to the clubhouse for a little bit," Jax said, "I shouldn't be long." Tara glanced up at him, nodding.

"Yeah, okay," she said. He smiled at them, stepping into the room to kiss Tara lightly on the lips and Abel on the top of his head.

"Alright, see you guys later," he said, walking out of the door.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

"Grab me a beer, will ya?" Lux asked as she and Jess walked into the clubhouse and she pranced off in the direction of Tig. Jess rolled her eyes as she walked behind the bar to grab a couple bottles, looking across the bar to see Piney and Bobby staring at her strangely.

"What?" she asked slowly. They both shook their heads.

"We're just trying to figure out who you look like," Piney said as Jess's eyebrows shot up.

"Yeah, you got Otto's eyes," Bobby said.

"Yeah but she's kinda got my jawline," Piney said as they both turned to study her.

"I don't see it," Bobby said, shaking his head, "She's kinda got my hair though. I mean, it's almost the same color."

"She definitely don't got your beer gut, though," Piney said, grinning at Bobby.

"Yeah well she doesn't have that Winston mountain man look, either," Bobby retorted. Jess looked at them both uneasily.

"LUX!" she called in desperation. Lux ran up to them, rolling her eyes at Bobby and Piney.

"Stop being creepy, possible fathers of my friend," she said, pulling Jess away.

"You're a big help," Jess said sarcastically and Lux beamed at her, her expression obviously saying 'you're welcome' as she led Jess over to where Tig was sitting with Juice and Chibs. Jess sipped on her beer, feeling awkward and uncomfortable with 'the mystery of Jess's dad' seemingly being known to everyone around here.

Lux glanced up as the door to the clubhouse opened and rolled her eyes dramatically, rising quickly from the table. Jess turned her head to see where she was going and her eyes widened as she saw that Jax had walked inside.

"What are you doing here?" Lux hissed at Jax. He raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"This is my clubhouse," he replied easily, "A better question would be what are _you_ doing here."

"This is my clubhouse, too," she said, crossing her arms across her chest. He snorted at her, moving to walk around her.

"The problem is, you actually think that," he said. Lux rolled her eyes, glancing over to see Jess throw her beer back and stand from the table.

"I'm gonna head back to the apartment," she said, walking quickly to the door without taking a second glance back. Jax's eyes followed her as she walked out of the clubhouse, his lips pursed. Lux turned angrily back to Jax.

"See, you scared her off," she said. Jax rolled his eyes.

"If she doesn't want to be here because of me, she can leave," he said, "I'm not going to avoid my own clubhouse because of her." Lux rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

"Yeah, don't tell me you didn't come here just to see her," she said, "Why aren't you with _Tara_?" Jax glared at her for a second before shaking his head and walking away from her.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**Because we posted this chapter a day earlier than usual and Sunday is such a long time to wait for the next one and also because now you all have spoiled us, if we get a good response on this chapter, we'll post the next one on Thursday or Friday! In addition to our usual Sunday update, of course. **

**So if you've got a second to spare, please please drop a note and let us know what you think! **


	11. Chapter 11

_**Author's Note: **_**So I know you all already know you're awesome, but I will tell you one more time – you're all totally awesome! To all of you who reviewed, we appreciate all of your feedback more than I can possibly say. Every time we get an email saying we got a new review we're texting each other back and forth about it and so excited, so please know we DO appreciate it! I hope you enjoy this next chapter :) **

* * *

Lux sat across from Jess at the diner, watching the table shake as Jess anxiously tapped her foot, staring at her food. She finally picked up the burger in front of her before throwing it back down, looking up at Lux.

"You alright there?" Lux asked her, though she knew why Jess was anxious. The results of the paternity tests were coming in today and Lux was having a time getting Jess's mind off of it. She'd suggested lunch as a last ditch effort to get her to stop pacing the apartment, but it didn't seem to be working. Jess's cell phone rang and she jumped, fumbling in her bag to get it and quickly opening it.

"Hello?" she said.

"It's here," Gemma said, "I promised you you could open it so you need to get your ass over here."

"We'll be there after lunch," Jess said as she hung up the phone, staring back at Lux, her eyes wide. Lux looked back at her, gnawing on a fry.

"We can go now," she suggested. Jess shook her head.

"No, we can finish eating," she said.

"You're not eating, and I can't eat with you bouncing your leg like that," Lux told her, throwing several bills down on the table, "Let's go."

"Yeah, okay," Jess said eagerly, tripping over her feet as she clambered out of the booth. Lux grinned, shaking her head, as she followed Jess outside.

They pulled up to the clubhouse several minutes later and walked into the office to see Gemma sitting in her chair behind the desk, waiting on them. She glanced up when they walked in and smiled, holding up a padded envelope and handing it to Jess.

"Moment of truth," she said. Jess took the envelope gingerly in her hands, staring at the front of it before glancing up at Gemma.

"I need a minute," she said, and without waiting for a response, turned around and walked outside. Lux went to follow her and Gemma grabbed her by the back of the shirt, pulling her back into the office.

"Let her have a minute," Gemma told her. Lux scowled but shrugged, flopping into Gemma's chair and looking worried.

Jess walked inside the clubhouse, not really knowing where her feet were taking her until they got there. She found herself at the ladder to the roof and quickly climbed up, knowing she wouldn't find more privacy than up there.

She sat down when she finally made it to the roof, her knees pulled up to her chest as she stared at the envelope in her hand, willing herself to open it. She flipped it over, putting one finger under the flap before quickly pulling her finger away. She had never felt more nervous, or more conflicted, in her life. The decision to finally know who her father was was the most challenging dilemma she'd ever been up against. She still wasn't sure if she even wanted to know, and at the same time was terrified that all the tests will have come back inconclusive and she'd be back to square one. Maybe they were all wrong and it wasn't even a Son at all. Maybe it was one that wasn't around anymore.

She had tried not to allow herself to hope at all. The idea that after 26 years she might finally have found her father, the idea that she'd find that he wasn't some drug dealer or junkie loser like her mom, was an idea she'd squashed long ago. It had been great having Rose in her life. That was already more than she'd ever thought possible, and staring at the envelope in her hand, she knew it held an even greater possibility and it terrified her that she'd be let down again.

She took a deep breath, finally sliding her finger under the flap when she heard the door to the roof open from behind her and knew immediately that it was Jax. She felt herself stiffen, afraid he'd be angry that she had utilized his spot.

"I'm sorry for being up here," she said quickly, her back still facing him, "I just needed to get away from everyone for a second and this seemed like the best spot." She heard him walk towards her and felt him take a seat next to her, but still didn't look up.

"What's in your hand?" he asked, looking down at the envelope.

"My father," she muttered. She finally glanced over at him, noticing that she was too full of nerves and anxiety about the envelope that she had no room to have those feelings towards Jax.

"I can't open it," she admitted, shoving the envelope into his hands, "You do it." He took the envelope from her, looking at her worriedly.

"Are you sure you want me to?" he asked. She nodded, feeling her entire body begin to shake.

"I can't open it," she repeated. Jax slid his finger under the flap, pulling out the contents and flipping through the pages while Jess watched him nervously, feeling as if she might have a heart attack. He looked down at the pages, his face full of shock, as he lifted his gaze to her face, staring at her for several moments.

"Well?" she asked anxiously. He shook his head, passing the page with the results on it to her. She snatched it out of his hands and skimmed the page, her eyes widening before she looked back up at him.

"Holy shit," she breathed.

"I know," Jax responded, "Bobby and Piney will be disappointed." Jess laughed, feeling the laugh catch in her throat.

"Why?" she asked.

"They always wanted daughters and you come with no child support," Jax responded, grinning. Jess laughed again before she stopped abruptly, looking sadly down at the paper in her hands.

"I'm sorry your dad's a Son," Jax said, watching her carefully. Jess shook her head slowly, looking back up at Jax.

"It's not that," she said, feeling tears brimming her eyes, "It's just… weird. Finally finding out who your father is and then finding out he's in prison for the rest of his life. And everything I've heard about him makes him seem like this great guy and I'll never get to have a relationship with him."

Jax nodded, reaching out to wrap an arm around her before changing his mind mid-course, resting his arm on his knee.

"Are you okay?" he asked. Jess shook her head, staring blankly at the paper in front of her.

"I don't know how I feel right now," she said quietly. They sat in silence on the roof for several more minutes before Jess finally stood and Jax followed her back downstairs. They walked into the clubhouse to see Lux and Gemma waiting at the bar, looking at Jess expectantly.

"Well?" Gemma asked. Jess gazed through her, handing her the paper.

"I'm going to the apartment," she mumbled, walking past them and out the door. Lux turned to Jax curiously.

"What was that about?" she asked. Jax shrugged, grabbing a beer from behind the bar.

"It's Otto," he said. Lux nodded, glancing at the door Jess had just walked through.

"Is she upset?" she asked.

"Not about him," Jax said, "Just about him being in prison." Gemma sighed, leaning back against the bar.

"Damn," she muttered, "I was really hoping it wasn't Otto. What good is he to her from behind bars?" Jax shrugged, taking a pull of his beer.

"I'm sure he'll do whatever he can for her once he finds out," Jax said. Gemma sighed, pulling out her phone.

"I need to call Luann," she said, "She can get word to Otto, and honestly she's probably the only person Jess wants to talk to right now."

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess sat upright on her couch in the apartment, still numb to the new information. She had always been slow to process things, and she couldn't even bring herself to go for a run. She had no idea how long she'd been sitting there for, it could have been minutes or hours, before there was a knock on the door. Jess pulled herself up to answer it, relieved to see Luann, and not Jax or Gemma, behind the door. She stepped back to allow Luann in, giving her a small smile.

"So I heard," Luann said tentatively as they sat on the couch. Jess nodded, feeling the tears starting to form again. She quickly brushed them away, looking over at Luann.

"From everything you've told me, he seems great," she muttered, "but how is this fair? Can you just tell me he's an asshole? That I'm better off with him in jail?" Luann shook her head sympathetically, reaching over to run her hand gently through Jess's hair.

"I can't tell you that," she said softly. Jess sighed, pulling her knees into her chest.

"I feel like a bitch for being disappointed, but I actually had hoped that maybe now I'd have a family," she said, tears now streaming freely down her cheeks.

"You do have a family," Luann told her, "You have me, and you have the club. You're our family now whether you like it or not." Jess looked over at her, afraid to believe her. If every foster kid out there was completely honest, they'd tell you that all they'd wanted their entire life was a family. A group of people that loved and accepted them no matter what. It was what they longed for, and Jess was having a hard time believing it was really happening.

"I brought something for you," Luann said, reaching into her bag, "I put it together a couple of days ago because I just… I just knew, just looking at you, that it would turn out like this." She pulled out a charm bracelet similar to the one hanging on her own wrist but with much fewer charms, handing it to her. Jess took it tentatively from her, staring down at the bracelet, before looking back at Luann, smiling at her.

"It's like mine, see?" Luann said, shaking the bracelet on her wrist and making all the charms jingle. She had clearly been collecting for a long time, if the amount of charms on her bracelet was any indication.

Jess flipped through the charms, smiling at the thought that had clearly been behind each one. There was a J for Jess, a tennis shoe that must symbolize her love for running, and even a rose for her aunt. She held up the next charm – 2 interlocking C's that was the logo for Cara Cara – and looked up at Luann.

"That's a special one. I only had two made. I have one on my bracelet and I thought you should have the other one," she said. She pointed to the last charm on Jess's bracelet, "We also both have a crow, too, symbolizing your new family."

Jess felt tears pouring furiously down her cheeks now, but out of a completely different emotion, one she hadn't felt since the day she met Rose. This was, hands down, the most thoughtful gift she had ever received. She put the charm bracelet on, clasping it around her wrist before leaning over and wrapping her arms around Luann who, judging by her sniffling, had started crying, too. They eventually pulled apart and Jess fiddled with the bracelet for several minutes before looking back up at Luann.

"Thank you," she whispered, "I…I love it." Luann smiled at her.

"You need to know you have family here now," she said, "People that love you, people that are gonna look out for you, okay?" Jess nodded, smiling back at her, finally beginning to believe it herself.

"Can I… can I meet him?" Jess asked hesitantly. Luann nodded.

"I'm already working on it," she said, "We'll need to pull some strings but we'll get you a visit."

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess lay on her stomach the next night, flipping through a magazine and unable to concentrate on any of the articles. All she could think about was how everything had changed in such a short amount of time. If she'd known how deep her roots were set in Charming, she figured she would have come here long ago and now found herself ironically thankful to her old boss, Ethan, for being such a colossal ass. She didn't think anything else would've gotten her to leave Santa Barbara.

She sighed as she flipped to the next page in the magazine, staring vacantly at an article about new summer fashion, her mind drifting towards the club. Finding out that her father was a member made her feel closer to it in a way that she couldn't describe. For the first time, she felt like she had a real home, a gift she never thought she'd have. On the other hand, she couldn't wear her rose colored glasses anymore. To fully embrace her new home would mean fully embracing club life, and she wasn't completely sure she was ready to do that, especially since it was still hard to be around Jax.

She thought about their argument. She had accused him of a lot of things, and maybe she'd been too rash. She tried to reason with herself, find any justification on why it was okay that Jax had done what he'd done to Ima. Lux _had _told her this kind of thing didn't happen very often… She shook her head. Once was still too often.

She sighed, rolling over on her back. She wanted so badly to make peace with it all. To get over her fear of slipping up one time at the clubhouse and winding up black and blue like Ima. But, she reasoned, Ima didn't just slip up. She'd pulled a damn gun on the vice president's sister, mother, and son. And her, whatever she had been to Jax at the time. She'd threatened his entire family.

Jess shook her head, trying to clear it. She knew she wouldn't be working this out tonight and tried to go back to her magazine, but just then Lux barged into her room, causing her to jump, startled at the intrusion. She scrambled up into a sitting position, glaring at Lux who was grinning broadly at her as she stood in the doorframe.

"Family dinner's in an hour," she announced, "I'm telling you last minute so you can't make up something to get out of it. I know you don't have any plans tonight."

"Why do I have to go?" Jess asked.

"Because," Lux said simply, "You're family now. And besides, Luann will be there and she'll be really disappointed if you don't come." Jess sighed, leaning back against the headboard.

"You had to play the Luann card, didn't you?" she asked. Lux grinned.

"Yup," she said, "Now get dressed."

As Lux and Jess walked into Clay and Gemma's, it became clear that everyone had shown up for family dinner, including Tara and Jax. Jess noticed it was getting easier to be around Jax, but this was the first time she'd seen him with Tara since that day from her balcony. She avoided them as much as she could without making things awkward, and luckily there were enough people around that it was fairly easy to do.

"Jess! I'm so glad you made it!" Luann exclaimed, walking across the room towards her and beaming. Jess smiled at her, wrapping her arms around her once Luann had made it to her.

"How're you doing?" Luann asked, taking a step away from Jess and watching her carefully. Jess nodded.

"I'm doing… okay," she said honestly and Luann nodded. She glanced down at Jess's wrist and smiled.

"You're wearing your bracelet," she commented. Jess glanced down and nodded.

"I only take it off to sleep," she said grinning.

"Well I'm glad you like it," Luann said, "Listen, the guys were able to pull some strings down at Stockton and were able to get you a visit next week. You think you're ready?"

Jess stared at her for at least a minute. When Luann had said they'd have to pull strings, she assumed it would take weeks, if not longer, to get it together. She hadn't expected it to come so soon. Now she wasn't at all sure if she was ready, but as she looked back at Luann's hopeful face, she found herself slowly nodding.

"Yeah," Jess replied. Luann beamed at her.

"Now don't be nervous," she said, "I know it's pointless for me to say that cause you're gonna be nervous either way, but he's real excited to meet you. He managed to get a cell phone from one of the guards and I told him all about you." Jess nodded, feeling better at the affirmation that she was at least a _wanted_ surprise.

Gemma called them all to the table several minutes later and everyone hurried around, taking a seat at the overcrowded table. Jess began to get uncomfortable through dinner, unsure of how to act or what to say. She knew and liked everyone sitting around the table, but finding out about her father had changed everything. She watched Lux, cracking jokes every chance she got and watched as everyone laughed fondly at her. She could feel the bond these people had with one another, and even though Luann and Lux insisted she was family, no piece of paper could create that overnight. By the time the dinner plates began to clear, she was entirely overwhelmed and knew she needed a moment to herself to regroup.

She mumbled an excuse as she pushed her chair from the table, walking through the kitchen and out to the back yard. She reached into her purse, grabbing her cigarettes and lighting one quickly. She leaned against the back of the house, staring out into the dark night sky as she inhaled, feeling the calming effect of the cigarette begin to take hold. She jumped slightly, startled, as the back door opened and glanced over to see Tara step out.

"Oh, sorry," she said quickly, "I didn't know anyone was out here." Jess shrugged as she took another drag off her cigarette.

"It's not my backyard," she said, "You can come outside if you want." Tara took a tentative step outside, closing the door behind her as she moved to stand near Jess.

"It just gets a little crazy in there sometimes," she said, "I just like to take a second to get away from it all."

"Yeah, I know the feeling," Jess replied. They stood there awkwardly for several moments before Tara finally spoke again.

"So, how are you liking living with Lux?" she asked, trying to start a conversation. Jess shook her head, chuckling slightly to herself.

"It's fine. How are you liking living with Jax?" she asked, her eyebrows raised. Tara bit her lip.

"I guess I walked right into that one," she said. Neither of them said anything else for several minutes.

"This is weird," Tara said, and that was enough to break the tension. Jess laughed, nodding in agreement.

"Of course this is weird!" she said, "This whole situation's weird. This whole family's weird!" Tara laughed.

"Oh you have no idea," Tara replied. Jess grinned, shaking her head as she inhaled on her cigarette.

"I'm actually glad you were out here. I've been wanting to talk to you," Tara told her. Jess eyed her nervously, not liking where this was going, "I don't really know what was going between you and Jax-" Tara started, but Jess interrupted her.

"Nothing was going on between me and Jax," she said quickly. Tara paused before speaking again.

"Well, based on the amount of times your name came up when Lux was screaming at him after we got back together, I don't really think that's true," Tara said.

"I'm not gonna try and get in between you and Jax, if that's where you're going with this," Jess told her, annoyance in her voice, "You don't need to worry about me." Tara nodded, pursing her lips slightly.

"Just… don't hurt him again," Jess added. Tara cocked her head at Jess, who sighed, "That's why Lux was so upset, you know? She's tired of seeing you break her brother's heart."

"I can't undo the past, Jess," Tara said, shrugging, "All I can do is try not to make the same mistakes." Jess nodded, tossing her cigarette to the ground.

"Try harder," Jess said, turning and walking inside the house.

Tara followed her inside and they walked into the living room, where most everyone had congregated after dinner. Jess saw Jax eyeing the two of them together with worry and she gave him a half smile, trying to appease him. Luann walked over to her, smiling excitedly and Jess eyed her nervously.

"What?" she asked. Luann shook her head, still smiling, as she turned to the crowded room.

"I've got an announcement!" Luann said loudly, gaining everyone's attention. The room hushed and they all turned to look at her. Luann turned to Jess, who felt her face heat with all eyes in the room on them, especially when she had no idea what this was about.

"As of right now, I am officially promoting Jess to Manager in Training at Cara Cara!" she said, looking down at Jess, who stared back at her as the entire room erupted in congratulations.

"Are you serious?" Jess asked and Luann nodded eagerly.

"I've been working there like 10 times as long as Jess, how come I've never been promoted?" Lux yelled from across the room, but she was grinning broadly at Jess.

"Because you only show up for half your shifts!" Luann called back at her.

"Whatever, Luann! Nepotism at work again!" Lux yelled back, shooting a wink at Jess who laughed. Tig ran up to Jess, wrapping his arms around her.

"Congratulations, Jess!" he said as Juice shoved a shot in her hand. Jax even flashed her a grin from where he stood across the room, raising the beer in his hand to her. The entire room seemed to take her small promotion as a personal victory, cheers-ing and congratulating her, and it was that moment that she finally felt like she belonged there, that she was a part of this family.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**Again, if you've got a second to review, please let us know your thoughts! We're loving your reviews so much and we might just keep updating more than even twice a week, like we did this week, if we're getting such a great response. It gives us motivation to write even more thus giving us more material, thus giving us more confidence in posting more often - chain reaction :) **


	12. Chapter 12

Jess sat at the bar at the clubhouse, nervously fidgeting and tearing a bar napkin into pieces. The day of her visit with Otto had finally arrived and Jess had never felt butterflies like these before. Luann had told her someone would come by to take her down to Stockton and as she waited, her mind flew to every worst case scenario she could imagine, as minds often do. What if he didn't like her? What if he was disappointed? What if Luann was wrong or had lied and he really didn't care about meeting her? She glanced up as the clubhouse door opened and Jax strode in, grinning at her.

"You ready?" he asked. She gaped at him, the shredded napkin falling from her hand.

"_You're_ taking me?" she asked, silently cursing Luann as Jax nodded.

"Yep, let's go," he said, holding the door open for her. She sighed, climbing off the barstool as she followed Jax out to his bike.

It wasn't a long drive to Stockton and they were there in less than an hour. Jess got off the bike nervously, gazing up at the prison in front of her. She'd never been inside a jail before, unless you counted holding cells that she'd spent some time sobering up in. But this prison was much more intimidating than a county lock up and she was suddenly glad she had Jax with her – someone who knew where to go and what to do.

They showed their IDs as they signed in at the front and both were searched before they were finally ushered into a large room with many tables set up inside. Jess glanced around nervously, finally spotting a lone prisoner with long hair and glasses covering an eye patch. She knew immediately that it was him. She glanced up at Jax, who gave her a reassuring smile, as they walked up to Otto.

Otto stood as they approached, smiling broadly at them both. He shook Jax's hand quickly before turning his entire attention on Jess.

"Oh my God," he whispered. He gazed at her for several moments before pulling her into a hug and she flung her arms around him, gripping him tightly to her. This was her father. She was finally hugging her father.

They stayed like that until a prison guard cleared his throat near them, motioning for them to part. Otto gripped her even tighter for a second before finally releasing her, taking a seat across from her at the table.

"I didn't know," he said, shaking his head, "If I'd have known…"

"You didn't," Jess said quickly, trying to reassure him. He smiled at her, reaching across the table to take her hand as her charm bracelet clattered on the table.

"I see Luann got you a bracelet," he said, looking down at it. She smiled, nodding her head.

"I never take it off," she responded. He smiled, gazing across the table at her.

"I can't believe I have a daughter," he said, tears brimming his eyes as he looked at her, "You're so beautiful." Jess smiled, trying not to allow herself to cry as well as Otto turned to Jax.

"Isn't she beautiful?" he asked, as if in awe. Jax grinned over at her as she felt herself blush deeply and he nodded.

"Yeah, she is," Jax murmured in agreement. Jess gave him a small smile before turning back to Otto.

"Well we don't have very long in here," Otto said, "But I want to know everything about you." Jess grinned.

"Okay…well… I was adopted when I was a baby," she began, deciding to start from the beginning. She went through the death of her adoptive family, being thrown into the foster care system, Rose finding her when she'd turned 18. She told him everything she could think of, wanting him to know who she was in the limited amount of time available. Once she got started, she found it was hard to stop and briefly worried that she was boring him, but he just continued nodding at her, drinking in the information.

"I'm sorry you've had it so rough, Jess," he said when she'd finally ran out of words, "It shouldn't have had to be like that." Jess shrugged, shaking her head as she gripped his hand tighter.

"What's done is done," Jess replied, "I'm here now." Otto smiled sadly at her, nodding as he reached his free hand across the table, stroking her cheek in his hand.

"Yeah, you are," he said.

Before Jess knew it, the guards were calling that visiting hours were over and Jess looked sadly back at Otto.

"I don't want to leave," she said. Now that she had finally met her father, she wanted to spend as much time as possible with him and it was more than frustrating that they got such limited time together.

"I don't want you to leave, either," he said, "Will you write to me?" Jess nodded fervently as they both rose from the table and embraced once more.

"I'll write all the time," she said, unable to stop the floodgate of tears that were now pouring down her cheeks. He smiled at her, holding her face in his hands as he gazed at her.

"My daughter," he whispered, the same look of awe still on his face, before finally allowing his hands to drop. She turned quickly away, knowing it was best to rip it off like a band aid, and filed out behind the other visitors. Otto grabbed Jax's arm as he made to follow her and Jax looked back at him.

"You take care of her," Otto said firmly, his voice low as he stared directly at Jax, "You make sure she's treated like SAMCRO. Promise me." Jax nodded, clapping Otto on the shoulder.

"Of course, brother," he said, "She is SAMCRO." Otto nodded at him, watching as he trailed out behind Jess.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

By the time Jax made it out of the prison, Jess was already waiting by his bike. With her arms wrapped around herself and her eyes still wet from tears he knew she was still upset, but this wasn't exactly his area of expertise.

"You okay?" he asked tentatively, stepping closer to her. She shook her head, tears pouring down her face again.

"Is there any chance he'll get out?" she asked meekly, her voice shaking through her tears, "Parole or anything?" Jax frowned as he shook his head and she let out a sob, turning her face from him. He took a step closer, pulling her into his arms and wrapping them tightly around her.

"I'm sorry, Jess," he whispered, kissing the top of her head, finding that his words had to do with a lot more than Otto. She sobbed silently into his chest, her shoulders shaking, until she was finally able to pull herself together. She took a step back from him, giving him a small, albeit sad, smile.

"I'm glad you were here," she said. He returned her smile, cupping her face in his hands as he wiped away her tears from her cheeks. She gazed at him, her chin tilted up, and he found himself desperately wanting to kiss her. She seemed to return the desire, moving subtly closer to him, until she shook her head, stepping away.

"We should get going," she said, grabbing the helmet from off his bike and strapping it under her chin. Jax ran a hand distractedly through his hair, nodding.

"Yeah, I guess we should," he said before slinging his leg over his bike. He felt her climb on behind him, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist, before he pulled out of the lot.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess tapped her fingers agitatedly on her steering wheel as she drove through the streets of Charming to her aunt's house. She'd decided to stop by on her way to work but was now slightly regretting the decision. She had yet to tell Rose about Otto and she wasn't quite sure how she would react to the news. Jess needed her to be supportive, but she couldn't help but think that Rose had to have suspected who her father was a long time ago and she didn't know why her aunt had decided to keep that information to herself.

She pulled up to Rose's and looked out at the house for several moments before finally stepping out of the car and walking up the drive.

"Hello?" Jess called as she walked through front door.

"Back here!" Rose called from the hall and Jess walked down to see her hanging a picture on the wall. Jess smiled as she looked at the picture of her and Rose on the beach in Santa Barbara, smiling widely into the camera. It had been taken on one of Rose's visits a year or two after they had met and they both looked so happy.

"Thought it was about time I got that hung up," Rose said, smiling at Jess, "So what brings you by?" she asked as they walked into the living room. Jess pulled nervously at the hem of the tank top she was wearing as Rose looked at her curiously.

"Well spit it out," she said, smiling as they sat down on the couch, "I know you got something to tell me." Jess sighed, nodding.

"I, um… I met my father yesterday," she said. Rose sucked in her breath, staring at Jess. That was obviously not news she had expected to hear.

"Your father?" Rose asked, "But… how?" She seemed to be at a loss for words. Jess told her about Luann and Gemma deducing that her father was a Son after finding out who her mother was and how they used an at home DNA kit to run samples against the most likely candidates.

"And there was a match," Jess finished, looking back at Rose, "It's Otto." Rose nodded, but she didn't look too surprised to find out the identity of Jess's father.

"Did you… know?" Jess asked slowly, trying not to let her tone become accusatory. Rose sighed, leaning back against the couch.

"No, Jess, I didn't know," she finally said.

"But you suspected," Jess stated. Rose shrugged.

"I thought it might be one of them, but I had no way of knowing who," Rose told her.

"You still should've told me," Jess insisted. Rose looked sadly back at her, nodding.

"Maybe I should have," Rose said, "But I didn't know what to tell you. I wasn't sure, and I had no way to be sure. I didn't want to tell you my suspicions and have you get your hopes up, only to find out it wasn't true. I hate to say it, Jess, but Daisy… let's just say she didn't make it easy to narrow down the suspect pool. Part of me figured it was one of them that was already gone, and that woulda done you no good. Guess I was only half right." Jess nodded, staring down at her hands.

"So you met him, huh?" Rose asked, "How'd it go?"

"It went great," Jess said unenthusiastically, "Apart from meeting him from the other side of a table in the middle of Stockton's visiting room. Apart from finding out that there's no way he's ever getting out." Rose nodded sympathetically.

"I'm sorry, Jess," she said, "How'd Luann take the news about you being her new step-daughter?" This question finally got a smile out of Jess.

"She was great about it. She gave me this," Jess said, holding out the charm bracelet on her wrist, "Said she thinks of me like a daughter now and promoted me to manager in training at Cara Cara." Rose beamed at her.

"That's wonderful!" she said, and her reaction was so sincere that Jess couldn't help but smile brighter, nodding.

"Yeah, things are coming together around here, I guess," she said. Rose nodded.

"Did you ever figure out your guy troubles?" she asked. Jess rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

"No, that's done," she said, "He went back to his old girlfriend, so…" her voice trailed off and she shrugged.

"Well, there'll be others," Rose said and Jess nodded, but inside she knew it would be a long time before she met anyone else that made her feel like Jax did.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Cara Cara was busy as usual and Jess was struggling to keep up with the pace. She'd just barely started training for her new position as manager but since they still hadn't hired a new waitress, Jess still had to take some tables when they were busy. On top of her tables, she was having to make sure the dancers got out on time, check the inventory, help make the schedules, handle the money at the end of the night, and make sure everything was running smoothly in general.

Things started to slow down slightly, giving Jess a chance to breathe, when she saw Jax, Tig, Lux, Opie, and Juice walk in, followed closely behind by several of the Niners. She smiled at LeRoy, who returned her smile as he and the rest of the Niners took a seat at a table in her section, the Sons sitting a few tables over. She waved at the Sons before walking over to the Niners to get their orders.

"How's it goin' guys?" Jess asked as she walked over to them, resting her hands on the table as she leant down to talk to them. She'd waited on them several times since first meeting them and they were always a great table – rarely making trouble and always tipping her well.

"Can't complain," LeRoy responded, "You know it's always a good night when you're working." Jess grinned, winking at him.

"Well don't get your hopes up much longer," Jess advised, "I was promoted to manager. Pretty soon, no more waiting tables for me." LeRoy clasped a hand over his heart in mock outrage.

"Hell if I knew you were lookin' for a better job, I'd a said you should come work at our bar. We need a girl like you out there," he said. Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"I think Oakland is a little far of a commute for me," she said.

"Oh we'd make it worth your while," LeRoy responded, winking at her. Jess rolled her eyes.

"Alright alright, what can I get you guys to drink?" she asked, grinning as they all placed their orders and she ran off to get them. After she brought them their drinks, she stopped by the Sons table to say hi and get their drinks. Seeing Jax's narrowed eyes at her, she glanced at Lux to try and figure out if he was angry with her about something, but Lux just rolled her eyes, mimicking shooting herself in the head.

"What were you talking to them about?" Jax asked. Jess raised her eyebrows at Jax's accusing tone, glancing over her shoulder at the Niners table before returning to Jax.

"Nothing, I was getting their drink orders," she said, "Oh, and LeRoy offered me a job," she added, grinning.

"You know that wouldn't be such a bad idea," Juice said, "She could get intel on them for us."

"Yeah, and get her god damn head blown off for her trouble," Jax spat at Juice, shaking his head.

Jess looked between the two, frowning in confusion. She had yet to realize how complicated relationships were between all these different groups. First Lux can't figure out if the Mayans are friends or enemies and now the Sons are talking about needing intel on a group that they seemed to be relatively friendly with. And she had a feeling Jax wasn't exaggerating about her getting her head blown off, which did nothing to ease her mind.

"Okay.. so I'll bring you guys a round of Buds?" Jess asked, changing the subject. They nodded and she hurried off to the bar to grab their beers. Lux turned to Jax, looking at him sideways and he reluctantly returned her gaze.

"What?" he asked.

"When are you just going to admit you're not over her?" she asked. Jax glared at her.

"Drop it, Lux," he said, his voice low. Lux shrugged, sitting back in her chair.

"Okay," she agreed, "For now. But you know I'm right."

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**Happy Easter everyone! I wanted to try to get this chapter posted before I was off doing Easter things. I want to give a BIG SUPER HUGE EXTRA LARGE THANK YOU to all of you who reviewed the last chapter. You know how to make our day! **

**If you've got a second to spare, please please review and let us know what you thought about this chapter! We'll continue to update more than just on Sundays if you continue to give us your feedback! **


	13. Chapter 13

Jess walked up the stairs to her apartment, her legs sore from a hard day's work and she was greatly looking forward to a shower and unwinding at the clubhouse after church. She'd gotten a lot more comfortable spending time there since the family dinner, and was really beginning to feel like she was a part of something. It wasn't a feeling she was familiar with, she'd been on her own her entire life, but it was a feeling she really liked.

She finally made it to her front door and stepped inside, her jaw dropping and her hands flying to her eyes as the scene before her unfolded.

"Oh my God!" she shrieked, peeking through her fingers to see Lux pressed against the wall, her slender legs wrapped around a shirtless Tig's waist. Tig dropped Lux when he heard Jess scream and turned around as Lux grasped Tig for support, breathing heavy as she grinned at Jess.

"Oh hey, Jess!" she said cheerfully. Jess finally removed her hands from her face, realizing the scene wasn't quite as bad as she had first suspected. They were both at least somewhat clothed.

"Hey," Jess mumbled awkwardly, her eyes darting around the room, "Um… I'll just go to my room." Lux shook her head.

"Nah, it's cool. I gotta go to church anyway," Tig said.

"Oh… okay," Jess responded, watching as Tig grabbed his shirt from the floor and threw it on, followed by his cut that was lying haphazardly on the back of the couch. He turned back to Lux, curling an arm around her neck as he kissed her, whispering good bye. Lux smiled up at him, watching as he walked down the hall and into Jess's room.

"Seriously!" Jess called hopelessly after him, "You've gotta figure out another way in here!" Lux giggled, her face still flushed as she walked into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. Jess followed her, sitting on a barstool at the counter.

"So I take it things are going good with you guys?" Jess asked. Lux grinned, nodding as she took a sip of water.

"Same old same old," she responded.

"Have you figured out how you're going to keep things going?" Jess asked, "Clay's bound to figure it out sooner or later." Lux shrugged.

"Yeah, well he's not figuring it out tonight, so we'll worry about that later," she said, but she looked worried.

Even though Lux's situation was completely messed up – hooking up with your dad's best friend was stuff made of Lifetime movies and after school specials – Jess couldn't help feeling a twinge of envy for Lux. Here she was with a guy that obviously loved her, that was willing to risk everything that was important to him for her, and who she loved in return. They may not be your average couple, but that was the stuff of biker fairy tales, and if Jess was honest, it's what she wanted most.

"Come on, let's get ready for tonight," Lux said and Jess smiled, nodding.

SOASOASOASOASOA

It took Lux and Jess almost two hours to get ready, and by the time they finally stepped out the door, they could see that the clubhouse was packed. Jess eyed Lux, whose smile widened as they walked down the stairs. There was nothing Lux loved more than a good party, mostly because, Jess suspected, it was much easier for her to sneak off with Tig throughout the night when there were a lot of people around.

As they crossed the street, Jess could hear raised voices from just behind the fence of the lot and stopped in her tracks when she recognized them. Lux stopped as well, glancing over at Jess, but Jess wouldn't move.

"We're not putting him in day care, Tara, end of story!" Jax was yelling.

"You're not thinking about what _he _needs," they heard Tara say, "He needs to socialize. He needs to be around kids his own age."

"He needs to be around his family!" Jax responded, "The decision isn't up to you. You are _not_ his mother." Tara paused for a second and Lux looked practically giddy, bouncing on the heels of her feet. Jess crossed her arms in front of her chest, feeling entirely awkward listening in on this conversation, but not wanting to walk past the gate and be seen by them.

"You're barely a father!" Tara yelled at him, his words having clearly angered her, "You're never around. You don't think maybe I want to go and get a drink with some friends every now and then, but I can't because you're always gone and someone's gotta watch Abel."

"That's what Neeta's for!" Jax bellowed at her. Jess glanced at Lux, finally making the decision to walk past them. She really didn't want to listen to Jax and Tara argue. Lux shook her head silently at Jess, trying to get to stay and listen, but finally gave in and followed Jess into the lot.

"Neeta's great, Jax, but she doesn't work 80 hours a week. She's got a family, too. Abel needs to be around kids his age. He needs to learn things so he's prepared for kindergarten. It's just not healthy for him not to have friends his age!" Tara said insistently. Jax glanced over to see Jess and Lux walk by and turned to Tara, scowling.

"We'll talk about this later," he growled at her. Tara glanced over at Jess and Lux before turning back to Jax.

"Yes, we will," she said, "We're not done." Jax rolled his eyes as Tara stalked past Lux and Jess, walking to her car that was parked on the street. Jax took a last glance at the girls before turning in the opposite direction as Tara and walking toward the clubhouse.

"Well that didn't sound good," Lux said, unable to keep the glee out of her voice.

"You could at least pretend not be so happy that your brother's miserable," Jess told her. Lux shrugged.

"It's his own damn fault," she said, "He's gotta come to his senses sooner or later, and sooner is always better."

Jess shook her head, trying not to think about Jax and Tara's argument. Couples fought all the time. It was not, as Lux wanted to believe, a sign that they were going to break up. It was just a normal couple fight. Jess found herself glancing around the room as soon as they walked inside trying to find Jax, before shaking it off. He'd moved on. She was over him. She just needed to prove it to herself.

She and Lux walked to the bar, grabbing a beer before joining Tig, Chibs, and Juice at a table. Jess shook her head, watching Lux lean subtly towards Tig and Jess wondered, for about the millionth time, how nobody saw it. She was beginning to think that it was something everyone knew and nobody talked about, except Clay who must have had an impossibly blind eye towards his daughter.

Several hours later, Lux had managed to sneak off somewhere with Tig and the party had died down considerably. A few of the guys had retired to their dorms with their chosen pussy of the night and the girls that were left were vying for the attention of any man in a cut. Clay, Jax, Bobby, and Opie had settled down at a table, playing poker while a few hang-arounds utilized the pool table.

Jess walked back to the bar, grabbing a beer before turning around and leaning against the bar, surveying the party. A guy Jess had seen around before but who was not a Son, evident by his lack of a cut, walked up to the bar, standing next to her as he, too, grabbed a beer. He turned back to look at Jess, grinning at her and she smiled back.

"Hi," she said tentatively.

"Hey," he responded, "I'm Ryan."

"Jess," she responded.

"So I was wondering if you could do me a favor," he said. She raised her eyebrows, eyeing him warily, "See my buddies David and Charlie over there want to play teams." He pointed to a couple of other hang-arounds that were holding cue sticks and standing next to the pool table, "But Charlie doesn't have a partner."

"You want me to play?" Jess asked doubtfully.

"You any good?" Ryan asked. Jess shrugged.

"Maybe slightly below average," she admitted.

"Perfect," Ryan responded, grinning, "Charlie always wins every game."

"Oh, so I'm gonna be, like, his handicap?" Jess asked, smirking. Ryan shrugged, smiling back at her.

"Hey, you said it, not me," he said, "Whatta ya say? You in?" Jess shrugged.

"Why not?" she said, following Ryan over to the table. He introduced her to David and Charlie before racking the balls.

"So tell me you've at least played before," Charlie said, smiling down at Jess as he handed her a cue stick and a block of chalk.

"I've played before," she reassured him, "Just… not well." Charlie laughed congenially, shrugging.

"Well maybe I can teach you a thing or two," he said, leaning slightly closer to her.

"Maybe so," Jess said, smiling flirtatiously at him before he walked over to the table to take his turn.

'_See,' _Jess told herself, '_You are so completely over Jax._' She watched him bend over the table, sinking two balls in a single shot before moving to take his next shot. He was even pretty cute. Younger and a little more clean-cut than most of the guys in the club. He had a hint of a 5 o'clock shadow, but that's where his beard ended. His brown hair was slightly shorter than Jax's and he tucked it behind his ear before grasping the cue stick, taking his next shot. The ball barely missed the pocket.

"Fuck!" he said, shaking his head as Ryan grinned, walking to take his turn. Ryan turned to Jess.

"I knew you'd be good luck!" he said, "For us, I mean." Jess laughed as Charlie walked back over to her.

"Ignore him," he said, leaning close to her, "He's an asshole." Jess laughed, nodding as Charlie slung an arm around her. She didn't even notice Jax watching them from the other side of the room, scowling at the display.

They played the rest of the game, Jess and Charlie barely winning with a lot more thanks to Charlie than to Jess for that. She had been able to sink two balls, but they were both purely by accident. Afterwards, Charlie led Jess over to the couches, sitting next to her.

"You know, I'm glad Ryan talked you into being my partner," he said, grinning at her, "You were definitely the hottest girl in here all night." Jess laughed, shaking her head at the lame line.

"Um, thanks," she said, smiling over at him. He lifted his hand, brushing a few strands of hair from her face as he moved closer to her, his face inches from hers. She debated briefly on allowing him to kiss her, but finally remembered that Jax was in the room playing poker at a table not far from where they were, and she didn't want to antagonize him in his own clubhouse. She had a feeling that wouldn't go over very well, so she moved away from Charlie, reaching into her back pocket and pulling out her pack of cigarettes to try to make an easy transition. But her pack was empty.

"Shit," she muttered. Charlie looked over at her.

"What's up?' he asked.

"Out of cigarettes," she said, tossing the empty pack on the table, "I'm gonna run over to my apartment and get another pack." Charlie shook his head.

"I got a cig for you," he said, offering her one from his own pack. Jess shook her head.

"Thanks, but I swear I'll be bumming off you for the rest of the night. I just live across the street," she said, rising from the couch and moving to walk towards the door.

"I'll walk you over," Charlie said quickly, moving to fall in line beside Jess. She smiled in surprise. SAMCRO was not generally the place you went to looking for gentlemen.

"Okay," she agreed. Charlie grinned, slinging an arm around Jess's shoulder as they walked out of the clubhouse.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax watched Jess walk out with one of the hang-arounds from where he sat at the poker table, his teeth gritted. He'd had one eye on them the whole time and watching her flirt with the guy bothered Jax more than he'd like to admit. He folded his hand, unable to concentrate on the game as his mind wandered to why they were leaving together. There was only one reason for it, and Jax did not like it. He knew he could have easily walked up to the hang-around and told him to never even look at Jess again, and he was suddenly wondering why he hadn't done just that.

But he knew why. Because he'd made his decision and she wasn't his. One thing was for sure, though. That guy had officially lost any chance of ever prospecting for the club.

"Looks like your girl's gettin' some," Opie said jokingly as he too folded his hand of cards. Jax glared at him, shaking his head.

"She's not my girl," he said as Tig took a seat at the table next to Clay. Jax rolled his eyes as Lux walked up after several seconds, thinking how ludicrous it was that no one else had noticed them constantly sneaking off together.

"Who's not your girl?" Tig asked as Opie and Bobby grinned at him.

"You gotta be talking about Jess," Lux said, grinning broadly at her brother, knowing she was busting his balls. Jax glared at her, getting angrier by the second. He was getting real tired of Lux constantly interfering. His knuckles were already white from the fists that had formed when Jess had walked out with another guy.

"She went home with some hang around, which clearly isn't bothering Jax at all," Opie told her. Lux's eyes widened and she grinned.

"Way to go, Jess!" she said as Jax scowled at her, "Oh yeah, clearly it's not bothering you." Jax continued to glare at her, but his glares had long ago stopped affecting her. She just continued to smile back at him.

"She was just some pussy," Jax said, trying to convince himself as much as them.

"You're kidding yourself," Clay commented as he threw his cards down, winning the round. Jax glared at him as Clay scooped up the pile of bills in front of him, grinning.

"Yeah, well, if you were as observant as you seem to think," Jax started, standing up angrily, "Maybe you'd have noticed at some point during the past year that your right hand man's been fucking your daughter."

The table went immediately silent, all eyes looking between Clay and Tig except for Lux. Her jaw dropped as she stared at Jax, tears forming in her eyes, but Jax was too angry to feel guilty. Clay's grin was wiped immediately from his face as he turned to look at Tig, rage behind his eyes. Tig looked back at Clay, obviously getting prepared for the beating he was about to get, knowing that if Clay didn't kill him, he'd have his patch stripped at the very least. It seemed as if he had been waiting for this moment to come for a very long time.

"My GODDAMN daughter!?" Clay bellowed at him, shoving his chair back so it clanged loudly in the quiet room, scattering back several yards as he rose from his seat, towering over Tig. To Tig's credit, he didn't flinch at all.

"Dad!" Lux choked. Clay turned to look at Lux, his finger held up.

"Don't, Lux," he said, his voice low, as if it was taking all of his strength to not scream at her, "You've been getting away with whatever you want for too long. You went too far this time."

"Dad, no!" Lux pleaded, "This isn't about you! I … I love him." Her voice choked up as Clay banged his fist angrily on the table. Clay turned back to Tig who stood, his feet shoulder width apart and his arms hanging loosely by his side. Clay pulled his fist back before punching forward, connecting with Tig's jaw. Tig's head flew back but he did nothing to defend himself. His arms were still hanging by his side as Clay punched him again and again.

"Stop!" Lux yelled, her voice shaking as tears poured down her cheeks, but Clay paid no attention to her. She grabbed Clay's elbow as it bent back to hit Tig again but Clay just shoved her away. Clay grabbed Tig by the collar as Tig looked sorrowfully back at Clay, but Lux squeezed herself between them before Clay could give the next blow.

"Get out of the way, Lux," Tig said softly, but she shook her head adamantly, staring at Clay.

"Stop, dad," she begged, "Please." Clay looked at Lux, fury flashing in his eyes before he turned to look disgustedly back at Tig, his lip raised in a sneer. He finally let Tig's collar go, shoving him back slightly as he did so, and turned to stalk outside of the clubhouse.

Lux turned to Tig, stroking her hand over the bruises that had already begun to form on his face as they heard the sound of Clay's bike roaring to life before it peeled out of the lot. Lux finally dropped her hand from Tig's face, rounding on Jax, her face contorted in pain and anger.

"That was a real dick move, Jax," she said quietly, her voice full of disbelief, before she rushed past him and out of the clubhouse. Jax glared at Tig, hoping he'd say something, give him some reason to finish Clay's fight. He felt the urge to punch something. But Tig didn't. He just shook his head slowly and dejectedly and followed Lux out of the clubhouse.

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Jess woke early the next morning and made her way to the kitchen, pouring a bowl of cereal before walking into the living room, turning on some Saturday morning cartoons. She leaned back on the recliner, pushing the foot rest up and slowly shoveling cereal in her mouth as her mind drifted from the cartoons to the night before. She shook her head, trying not to let her mind go there. Charlie had seemed like such a nice guy. She should've known better. She should've known that 'nice guys' were not to be found at the SAMCRO clubhouse.

She sighed, setting her finished cereal bowl on the coffee table as she tried to focus on the TV. After a couple of hours of mindlessly watching cartoons, Lux walked into the living room, Tig trailing behind her. Tig flung himself on the couch and Lux curled into him, Tig's arm wrapped tightly around her.

"My window's open if you need to use it," Jess said with a grin before ripping her eyes from the cartoons and turning to look at them. She frowned when she realized how miserable they both looked, her eyes widening at the sight of Tig's banged up face.

"What happened to you?" Jess asked quietly.

"Word got out about us," Lux explained and Jess raised her eyebrows.

"What?" Jess asked, "Clay knows?" Lux nodded and Jess stared at her in disbelief for several moments.

"What are you going to do?" she finally asked and Lux shrugged, glancing up at Tig as she grasped the breast of his t-shirt tightly in her fist, resting her head on his shoulder.

"I don't know. Dad took off last night. I haven't heard from him. Tig and I were up all night talking about what to do," Lux said.

"Did you come up with anything?" Jess asked.

"I'm thinking about going nomad," Tig said. Jess frowned.

"What's nomad?" she asked.

"It's a charter of the Sons that doesn't really have a home. They're always traveling all over to different charters when they're needed," Tig explained. Jess glanced at Lux, her brow furrowed.

"And you'd be okay with that?" Jess asked.

"No!" Lux said, "But we don't have much of a choice. Either way, he can't stay in Charming. Not unless we break it off and… well… that's not an option. He'll either get his patch stripped and have to leave town… or turn nomad. And that's _if_ Clay doesn't actually kill him." Jess had never seen Lux look so defeated. Tig ran his hand up and down Lux's arm in an attempt to comfort her.

"But… how did he even find out?" Jess asked.

"Jax," Lux replied simply, "Stupid fucker just came right out with it." Jess narrowed her eyes. The last time she'd talked to Jax, it hadn't seemed like that was something he would do. Though, Jess reminded herself, Jax did a lot of things that seemed like something he wouldn't do. He was becoming an enigma to her.

"Why would he do that?" she asked.

"You," Lux said, shrugging, "He saw you bring some hang around home and flipped. Got so pissed when some of the guys started ragging on him about it, wanted the attention on someone else, I guess."

"He… _what_?" Jess asked in shock, "But I didn't… I mean, nothing even happened with that guy. I wasn't 'bringing him home'. I needed cigarettes and he walked me over here to get them."

"Why didn't you come back then?" Lux asked.

"Because…" Jess started, "Because he clearly thought I was bringing him over here for another reason. So after a hard kick in the nuts, he decided it was better if he left and I didn't really feel like going back to the clubhouse after that." This finally got a smile out of Lux.

"That's my girl!" she said, "At least I know you can take of yourself." Jess laughed.

"Been doing it my whole life," she reminded her. Lux grinned, nodding as her cell phone rang. She lifted her head from Tig's shoulder, glancing at the caller ID and groaned.

"It's my mom," she said miserably, "I really do not want to talk to her."

"Answer it," Jess advised, "She's just gonna keep calling." Lux sighed, finally nodding as she answered the phone. Jess and Tig watched her listen for several seconds before she hung up the phone abruptly, staring at Tig.

"My dad flipped his bike last night," she said, her face full of shock, "He's in the hospital."

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_**Author's Note: **_**Thank you thank you thank you to all our wonderful reviewers! You guys make our day! **

**If you've got a second, let us know your thoughts because any feedback is just vital to us and to making the story better. We will continue to update early if you continue to review!**


	14. Chapter 14

Jess followed Lux and Tig to St. Thomas Hospital, thanking God for small towns with little traffic. They got to the hospital in record time and rushed through the front doors, looking wildly around for some sort of direction.

"Clay Morrow?" Lux gasped at the information desk.

"He's in room 314," the nurse told her. Lux nodded as Tig and Jess followed her down the hall until they'd found the right room. The whole club was sitting in the waiting room just outside, their heads in their hands, while Gemma paced the room back and forth. She looked up when Jess, Tig, and Lux walked in, rushing to Lux and pulling her into her arms. Lux hugged her back before looking up at her, her eyes searching for news.

"What's going on? Is he gonna be okay?" Lux asked. Gemma nodded shakily.

"They think he'll be fine," she said, "But his arm's broken and his hands are nearly useless now." Lux swallowed hard, nodding, as she collapsed in a chair next to Tig. Jess looked around, her eyes narrowing as she spotted Jax walking down the hall away from them and she quickly ran after him.

"Hey!" she called, but Jax didn't turn around.

He'd been attempting to avoid Jess all day, knowing she must have heard the whole story by now, and now that she was here, he couldn't stand to see disappointment in her eyes.

"Hey! I want to talk to you," Jess said, and he could hear her jogging up behind him. Jax finally turned.

"What?" he asked, his voice coming out more agitated than he meant it to. She stopped in front of him.

"If you've got a problem with me, you need to talk to _me_ about it. Don't take it out on Lux," Jess told him.

"I don't have a problem with you," he responded.

"That's not what I hear," Jess said, refusing to be deterred, "You see me leave the clubhouse with some guy and all of a sudden you're outing Tig and Lux?"

"You're acting like a goddamn passaround," Jax growled at her, her eyes widening at his words, "You're the daughter of a Son. Maybe you should remember that."

Jess stared back at him for a moment, trying not to let his words get to her. She knew, for whatever reason, that his words were said out of jealousy and anger, but she had never felt more frustrated in her life. She debated telling him that nothing had happened between her and the hang-around; that she most definitely was not acting like some 'pass around.' But she stopped herself. She can sleep with whoever she wants. It was none of his business who she was, or was not, doing.

"Yeah, that's clearly what this is all about," Jess finally said sarcastically, her arms crossed across her chest. Jax looked away, shaking his head slightly.

"I just…" Jax started, his voice trailing off and his face now pained instead of angry. He ran a hand through his hair as he looked back at Jess, her eyes now full of anger. He deserved that. But he still couldn't help but want to know if there was anything there left for him. He began to wonder if getting back together with Tara had been a mistake. If he hadn't, would Jess have come around to him eventually?

"You just what?" Jess asked, glancing over his shoulder to see Tara walking towards them in her scrubs and white lab cab.

"I just … don't like seeing you with other guys," he finally admitted, his eyes searching her face for her reaction. She scoffed, shaking her head, seeing Tara stop in her tracks behind Jax at his words.

"Yeah, now you know how I feel," she said derisively, nodding over his shoulder, "Your _girlfriend_'s here." Jax turned around as Jess walked back to the waiting room, wishing she could get five seconds inside Jax's head to know what was going on up there.

Jess glanced at her watch as she walked up to Lux and sighed. Her shift at Cara Cara started in less than an hour and if she didn't leave right now, she was going to be late. She glanced at lux apologetically.

"I need to get to work," she said, "Will you be okay here?" Lux nodded, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I've got everyone else," Lux said, motioning to the packed waiting room, "Tell Luann I won't be able to make it tonight?" Jess nodded.

"Sure, take all the time you need," she said, before turning to walk out of the waiting room.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess knocked briefly on the frame of Luann's open door before stepping into her office. Luann glanced up, smiling at Jess as she slid the glasses off her face and glanced up at her.

"Hey," Jess said, "I wanted to let you know Lux won't be able to make it today." Luann's smile fell, replaced by utter frustration.

"I swear to God I don't know what to do with that girl!" she exclaimed, "She treats this job like she's a fucking volunteer, gracing us with her presence when she does show." Jess bit her lip in worry, knowing Luann obviously hadn't heard about Clay.

"It's because of Clay," she said quickly, "He flipped his bike last night. They're all at the hospital." Luann's eyes widened, the frustration wiped from her face.

"Oh," she said, "Oh my God. Is he okay? Nobody told me."

"I think Gemma said he'll be fine," Jess told her, "Just a broken arm and something about his hands being messed up." Luann breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank God for that," she said, "And I'm sorry about blowing up about Lux. I've already had a shitty day and she's had a tendency to call out a lot. Much less since you've been living with her. I think you're a good influence." Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"I do what I can," she said jokingly.

"Why are you still living with her anyway?" Luann asked curiously, "I happen to know for a fact you're making good money, as it's my signature on your checks. You could afford to be on your own." Jess shrugged.

"I like living with Lux," she replied, "I don't really want to be on my own. Lux has become like a … sister to me now." Luann nodded, smiling.

"Well I'm glad for that," she said.

"Thanks," Jess replied, "So why's your day been shitty?" Luann shook her head, leaning back in her chair.

"It always is when I have to deal with Georgie Caruso," she said bitterly.

"Who's Georgie Caruso?" Jess asked.

"Guy runs a strip club on the other side of town, near Lodi," Luann said, "Always tryin' to poach my girls, offerin' em the world. But he runs a dirty club. I wouldn't wish that place on any of my girls, and they know it. They know they got a good thing here, but he's a miserable little shit and I just hate having to deal with him."

"He sounds like an asshole," Jess responded. Luann sighed, shaking her head.

"He's more like an annoying little piss ant," she said as she handed Jess a list of tasks to complete for the day and Jess took it, walking out of the office.

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Jess pulled into her usual parking space in front of the apartment after her shift was over, once again worn out from the day's events but ever since she started her manager training, she was also feeling a sense of accomplishment after a hard day's work. She noticed Lux's car parked in her spot and smiled, glad Lux had decided not to spend the whole night waiting around the hospital. She didn't think that would be good for her.

Jess walked into the apartment, tossing her keys on the table in the entry and smiling at Lux, who was sitting on the couch, until she noticed Lux was curled up, sobbing.

"Oh my God, Lux what happened?" Jess asked, immediately worrying that something had happened to Clay. Lux sniffled as she sat up, taking deep breaths to try and get herself back under control.

"It's… Tig," she said, her entire body shaking as she gasped for breath, "He… broke things… off."

She collapsed into Jess's arm, sobbing into her shoulder as Jess wrapped her arms around her, patting her on the back, trying not to show the shock she felt. Just this morning, Tig was saying he'd rather be forced out of Charming than end things with Lux, and now 12 hours later he'd broken up with her?

"I'm sorry, Lux," Jess whispered.

"I didn't even do anything!" Lux wailed, her face still tucked into Jess's shoulder, "I didn't do anything."

"I'm sure you didn't," Jess said. They sat on the couch until Lux had cried as much as she was able and she sat up, her face red and blotchy, her eyes bloodshot.

"I don't know what to do," she muttered. Jess had never seen Lux this upset. She'd seen Lux angry, she'd seen her worried, and she'd seen her scared. But she'd never seen her _sad_.

"Here's what we'll do," Jess said, "I'll make us some drinks, roll a joint, and we'll sit on the balcony and talk all about how much men suck." Lux tried to laugh, but it came out as a hiccup. She smiled up at Jess, sniffling as she nodded.

"That's sounds perfect," she said. Jess smiled as she ran to do as she promised and they walked out onto the balcony as Lux took the first hit off the joint.

"So I saw you talking to Jax at the hospital," Lux said after she had exhaled, passing the joint to Jess. Jess nodded as she took a hit.

"Just told him if he's got something to say to me, he needs to say it to me and not take it out on you," she said. Lux nodded.

"How'd he take that?" she asked.

"Not well. Said I needed to stop acting like a pass-around," Jess replied. Lux's eyes widened.

"He did not," she said, "I take it you didn't tell him nothing happened during your little rendezvous with the hang-around?" Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"Didn't think it was any of his business," she said. Lux laughed as she nodded, and Jess was glad to see Lux starting to feel better and get her mind off Tig. Just as the thought passed through her mind, she glanced down through the bars of the balcony, noticing Tig walking across the street towards them. Her eyes widened as she glanced at Lux, but Lux still hadn't noticed him.

"I'll go grab some refills," Jess said, hopping up, "Stay here, I'll be right back." Lux nodded, the joint clearly calming her down, as Jess grabbed her glass that was still half full and walked inside, shutting the door behind her. She ran to the door before Tig could knock, flinging it open and glaring at him. She let him inside, but only so Lux couldn't hear them talking.

"You need to leave," Jess told him quickly, "I finally got Lux calmed down."

"I just need to talk to her," Tig said earnestly, but Jess shook her head.

"No, Tig! If you ever cared about her, you'd just leave before you do any more damage," Jess said angrily, "You know, for a bunch of badass bikers you all can be the biggest bunch of cowards I've ever seen when it comes to relationships. Shit gets a little hard, and you just bail-"

"Stop!" Tig yelled at her, interrupting the lecture, and Jess jumped back, startled by his anger. She looked back at him, at how twisted and pained his face was, and finally took a deep breath, nodding.

"Okay, then tell me why you're here," she said. Tig ran a hand through his curly hair, his bright blue eyes full of pain.

"I made a mistake, Jess," he said, "I can't be without her." Jess stared at him for a moment before regaining her position.

"You better be sure," she said, "Because if you tell her that and you change your mind later, she's going to break, Tig. After how she was earlier tonight, I don't know if she'd recover from a second time." Tig nodded.

"I'd rather stay with her and go nomad than break things off and stay in Charming," he told her. Jess looked doubtfully back at him.

"Then why did you break up with her in the first place?" she asked. Tig sighed, looking around the room as he shook his head.

"You don't understand, Jess. I doubt Lux even does," Tig started rambling, "You can't understand sitting around that table with your friend, your _brother_, having to look him in the eye every day for over a year, knowing he trusts you with his life when he can't even trust you with his daughter."

Jess frowned as she looked back at Tig, finally uncrossing her arms. She'd never thought about their situation from Tig's perspective.

"And it's been torturing me," Tig continued, "Ever since it happened. The first time, I just thought it was a huge mistake. And it was on the tip of my tongue to tell Clay every single day. And then I…. fell in love with her, which neither of us saw happening, and I couldn't risk it. We were always waiting for the right time but…" He shrugged as his voice trailed off and he tried to get his thoughts together. She looked at his still heavily bruised face, the constant reminders of his betrayal, as she waited for him to go on.

''And now Clay is in that hospital bed because of me. Because I was too selfish to risk losing her, losing my patch. And I thought… if I gave her up, if I stopped being selfish, then everything would be okay. But it's not. She's the most important person in my life," he finished. Jess continued to stare at him, feeling her own eyes begin to brim with tears of empathy before she nodded, pointing to the balcony door.

He gave her a small smile as he headed in that direction and Jess watched as he closed the door behind him. She watched as Lux stood and screamed at him, banging her fists against his chest in anger as he stood there, allowing her to get it all out until she finally collapsed in his arms. She watched as Tig embraced her, wrapping his arms protectively around her, whispering words Jess couldn't hear. Lux tipped her chin up to look at him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as she jumped up, wrapping her legs around his waist. He clutched her, holding her up as she kissed him and Jess smiled, walking down the hall to her bedroom to give them some privacy.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess stepped out of the apartment the next morning and into the hazy early morning world outside. She loved running at this time of day. The small town was just starting to wake up and it always seemed so peaceful. She ran down the steps of her stairs, prepared to start her jog to the park she'd been running at regularly, when she heard the tell-tale rumble of a motorcycle approaching her and turned to see Jax, on his way to Teller-Morrow, pull up beside her.

"Mornin'," he said. She brushed back the strands of hair that had escaped her ponytail as she looked at him. She hadn't seen him since their argument at the hospital the day before and though she was still angry about his words to her, she knew waiting for an apology was futile.

"Morning," she replied.

"So you're running… again?" Jax asked, eyebrows raised. Jess rolled her eyes.

"Yes, it's kind of a regular thing," she said. He shrugged.

"Alright," he said. He looked like he was about to ride into the lot before he glanced back at her, "Look, about yesterday…" he said, his voice trailing off. Jess shrugged, shaking her head.

"It's fine, Jax," she said, "But I'm not your old lady. You might see me with other guys. I can't…" Her voice trailed off as she turned her head from him, unable to finish the sentence. '_I can't wait around for you forever_,' she thought. He shrugged, nodding.

"Yeah, I get that," he replied, and it was hard to judge his mood. He revved his bike up slightly harder than normal as he spun into the TM lot. Jess stood for a moment, watching him pull in, before she shook her head, setting off for the park.

She ran around the trail several times, lost in her own thoughts. She was right. She couldn't wait around for him forever. She needed to put herself out there, meet someone else who wasn't in a relationship already. She looked ahead of her to see the same guy she'd raced at the park several weeks ago – the day Gemma and Luann had told her their suspicions about who her father might be. She'd seen him around several times after, but hadn't talked to him since that day.

She grinned to herself, running to catch up with him. He glanced over at her as she began to keep time with him and grinned, shaking his head.

"You again," he said, his voice friendly. Jess laughed.

"Me again," she said.

"The girl that kicked my ass," he replied.

"That's what they call me," she said jokingly.

"You know I've been hoping to see you again," he said, "I want a rematch." Jess raised her eyebrows at him but shrugged, immediately taking off in a sprint.

"No fair!" he called from behind her, but she could feel him catching up. She ran as fast as she could but he overtook her. She struggled to catch back up until they'd circled around and made it back to where they started from and she stopped, panting.

"Okay okay, you win," she gasped, her hands resting on her knees as she struggled to regain her breath. He grinned, but he was also panting heavily.

"I knew… that was just … a fluke," he said, gasping in between breaths. Jess laughed, rolling her eyes.

"I'm Jess, by the way," she said, once she'd caught her breath. He grinned.

"Craig," he responded and she smiled back at him.

"Can I walk you home, Jess?" he asked and Jess's smile widened as she felt herself blush.

"Um, sure," she said and he grinned as they set off back to her apartment.

"So what do you do?" Craig asked in an attempt to make conversation. Jess paused before answering. She'd never been in the situation of having to tell a stranger outside of the life that she worked at a strip club and she suddenly worried that that would be the end of that.

"Um… I'm a manger of a club just outside town," she replied evasively, hoping he wouldn't ask any further.

"Oh really? Which one?" Craig asked.

"Oh it's called … Cara Cara," Jess replied reluctantly. She chanced a glance over at Craig as they continued walking to see his eyebrows raise.

"Oh really?" he asked, but his voice didn't sound judgmental and Jess allowed herself to relax slightly, "Is that tough? Managing a … Gentleman's club?" Jess shrugged.

"No tougher than running any other bar, I suppose," she said, "But I like it. The owner is… well, it's a long story, but I guess technically she's my step-mom."

"That didn't sound like such a long story," he replied.

"Well there's a lot more to it than that," Jess said, hoping to end the conversation there, "So what do you do?"

"Oh me? I'm in real estate," he replied.

"Oh, that sounds interesting," Jess replied. He shrugged.

"It can be," he said. They were close to Jess's apartment now and she glanced up at the balcony, hoping Lux wasn't up there. But of course she was. With Jax. Jess grimaced slightly as she stopped at the bottom of the stairs, turning to Craig.

"Well… this is me," she said. Craig nodded, looking disappointed that their walk had already ended.

"Okay, well… Can I see you again?" he asked, "Maybe outside runner's gear next time." Jess grinned.

"Yeah, I'd like that," she said, feeling herself blushing. Craig grabbed his cell and she dialed her number in, hoping like hell Lux wasn't watching but feeling like the odds of that were slim to none.

"Alright, I'll call you," he said, "It was nice to meet you, Jess."

"Yeah, you too," Jess said sincerely as she walked up the stairs, finding herself genuinely hoping he would call as she walked inside the apartment.

"So I see you made a little loooove connection," Lux said teasingly from the door of the balcony as she and Jax walked inside. Jess glanced awkwardly at Jax, but he remained expressionless and silent, before she turned back to Lux.

"Um… yeah," Jess said, "I guess. He's just this guy I met running at the park a couple weeks ago."

"Oh, you already have so much in common," Lux said happily. Jess laughed, shaking her head.

"Yeah, I guess we'll see if he calls," she said.

"Oh he'll call," Lux responded confidently. Jess nodded as she walked into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, chugging it down.

"So what's his name?" Lux asked, bending over the counter and grinning at Jess.

"Craig," Jess replied.

"Well we need to go shopping to get a cute outfit for that date he's going to call asking you on," Lux said, "Something sexy." Jess laughed as Jax cleared his throat from the living room.

"Lux, we were kind of in the middle of a conversation," he said, his voice full of annoyance. Jess bit her lip, looking back at Lux.

"I need to take a shower anyway," she said. Lux just waved her brother off, shaking her head.

"He knows I'm still mad at him and he's in trouble, so it's a rare occasion where he's trying to be extra nice to me," she said, grinning, "It's kind of fun." Jess laughed, shaking her head.

"There's my Lux," she said, "Making the most of every situation." Lux beamed, nodding.

"So any news on your dad?" Jess asked. Lux nodded.

"Yeah, he should be getting out of the hospital in a few days," she said. She lowered her voice, leaning further over the counter, "But… he won't be able to ride for, like, a really long time. Maybe ever. Which means he can't be president anymore." Jess raised her eyebrows.

"Oh my God," she said, "So does that mean…? I mean, Jax is Vice President…" Lux nodded, grinning.

"I think so. You know no one tells me shit but I'm almost positive he's going to become president. And then," her voice lowered even further, "It won't even be an issue if my dad won't let Tig and I be together because he won't have any power over Tig. He can't strip his patch or anything, and I know Jax will leave us alone." Jess beamed at Lux, shocked at how things had seemed to fall into place.

"That's… awesome," Jess said. Lux nodded.

"I mean, I feel really bad for my dad. I know this is going to be really hard for him. That chair is his whole life. But… you know, silver linings and all that. It should be talked about at church this week so we'll know soon enough. Keep your fingers crossed," Lux said. Jess nodded.

"I will," she said, "But now I've really got to shower." Lux nodded, walking back into the living room to talk to Jax while Jess made her way down the hall to her bathroom. Things were definitely still awkward between her and Jax and she wondered if that would ever change.

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_**Author's Note: **_**Thank you SO MUCH for all the reviews on our last chapter! We love y'all soooo much! I really hope you guys liked this chapter and pleeeeease drop a note and let us know what you thought! Remember the more feedback we get, the more often we'll be able to post! You guys are definitely our inspiration to write faster! :) **


	15. Chapter 15

"Okay, how do I look?" Jess asked as she stepped into the living room, wearing the new jeans and top she'd bought for her date with Craig. Lux had insisting on taking her shopping minutes after Craig had finally called to ask her out and Jess hoped they made the right choice.

Tig and Lux were sitting on the couch watching a horror movie and Lux paused it, turning to look at Jess. Tig wolf whistled at her, grinning, while Lux nodded.

"Hot," she said, "I told you those jeans made your ass look good." Jess smiled. She really wanted this date to go well. Craig was a nice, normal guy with a nice, normal job and Jess was hoping he was just what she needed to finally stop thinking about Jax.

"Good," she said just as there was a knock on the door.

"Oh, shit, he's here," she said, feeling her pulse begin to race as she checked herself in the mirror in the living once more before grabbing her purse. She opened the door to see Craig, dressed nicely in slacks and a button down and no leather in sight, a bouquet of lilies in his hand. Jess smiled as she took them from him, giving Craig a hug.

"You look beautiful," he said in her ear and she smiled, looking down at the flowers in her hand.

"Thank you. These are beautiful," she murmured, "Let me just put them in water." Craig nodded, following her inside as she walked toward the kitchen, "Craig, this is my roommate Lux, and that's Tig," she said as she grabbed a vase from under the sink, quickly filling it with water and setting the lilies inside. She smiled as she set the vase on the kitchen counter before walking back to Craig.

"Ready?" he asked. She nodded and they turned to walk out of the door. She followed him down the stairs to his car and widened her eyes at the black Audi roadster in front of her. He opened the door for her and she slid in, wondering if she'd ever even sat in a car that nice, as he hurried around to the driver's side.

"There aren't a whole lot of choices in Charming," Craig told her as he pulled out of the drive, "But there's a great seafood restaurant in Manteca I thought I'd take you to." Jess nodded, smiling.

"That sounds great," she said. Craig grinned as he pulled onto the highway.

They pulled up to the restaurant less than half an hour later and Jess followed him out of the car and up to the door. He opened the door for her and she smiled, thinking that it had been a long time since she'd been out with the type of guy that would open doors for her.

They were seated almost immediately and the hostess set menus in front of them. Jess picked the menu up, perusing it as their waiter came over to get their drink order. Before Jess could say anything, Craig ordered a bottle of wine for the table.

"You've got to try the sea bass," Craig told her as the waiter left to get their wine. Jess looked at him over her menu.

"I was actually thinking about the salmon," she responded. Craig shook his head.

"Trust me, their sea bass is the best you've ever had," he said, smiling at her. She shrugged.

"I've never really liked sea bass," she admitted.

"You'll like theirs," he said, still smiling. The waiter returned with their bottle and uncorked it, pouring a small amount in a glass for Craig to try. It passed the test and the waiter poured two glasses for them.

"Are you ready to order?" he asked.

"Yes," Craig said, smiling up at the waiter, "I'll take the surf and turf and she'll have your Chilean Sea Bass." Jess frowned at him, about to turn to the waiter to correct him, but he was already walking away. She turned back to Craig.

"I didn't want the sea bass," she reminded him. He shook his head.

"Trust me. You'll love it," he responded. Jess sighed, thinking if he liked their sea bass so much he should've ordered it for himself, but she kept her thoughts to herself. It had been a nice evening up to this point and she really didn't want to ruin it.

"Okay," she conceded, "But for future reference, I like to order for myself." Craig nodded.

"Okay," he agreed, "But I know you'll love it."

"I better, I'm starving," she said. He laughed, nodding, and she already felt better about the incident.

Their food arrived, and much to Jess's surprise she did enjoy the sea bass, nearly finishing the entire plate. After several glasses of wine and an enjoyable meal, she had all but forgotten her annoyance that he had ordered for her. He smiled at her from across the table.

"This is nice," he said. She returned his smile, nodding in agreement.

"Yeah, it is," she said, "But I need to use the restroom. I'll be right back." He nodded as she scooted out of the booth, walking to the ladies room on the other side of the restaurant.

Walking back to her table from the bathroom, she heard Craig's raised voice and looked across the restaurant to see their waiter standing in front of him, his hands clasped in front of himself and looking very upset.

"You are such an idiot!" she heard Craig remark, and saw the waiter flinch slightly at his words. Jess frowned, unable to hear what else Craig was saying as he had lowered his voice, and by the time she arrived at the table the waiter was hurrying off.

"Why were you talking to him like that?" she asked, anger in her voice as she took her seat across the table from Craig. Craig looked across at her, clearly thrown off that she had heard him, and shook his head, remaining silent.

"You know, I waited tables for a long time," Jess told him angrily, "I still do from time to time. You have no idea how hard his job is."

"No, Jess, I wasn't-" he started, stammering over his words, "He… said something vulgar. About you. I was just defending you, is all." Jess stared across at him for a moment. That was not a response she was expecting.

"Well, what did he say?" she asked, her anger now transferring from Craig to the waiter.

"I don't want to repeat it," Craig said, "But it wasn't… nice."

"Oh," Jess said, "Well then, thanks, I guess." He grinned, taking her hand from across the table.

"Of course," he said, "You ready?" Jess nodded and they both stood as she followed him back out to the car.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Craig walked Jess to her door, but she decided to leave the date there. After her momentary fling with Jax, she really wanted to start this slow. She walked into the apartment, her eyebrows raised, to see Tig and Lux snuggled under a blanket on the couch, watching TV. Thrown hastily around the room were doctor's scrubs, a nurse's uniform, and Jess was pretty sure a stethoscope was lying on the coffee table. They looked up when she walked in, Lux grinning at her.

"Well, this is new," Jess commented, not wanting to think about Tig and Lux playing doctor.

"Well, now that the secret is out, we don't have to hide it anymore," Lux said happily.

"Could you, please?" Jess asked, only half joking, but Lux dismissed her question.

"We didn't expect you home so soon," she said by way of explanation, "Date not go well?"

"It went fine. Craig is just a gentleman," Jess said. Lux rolled her eyes, curling further into Tig as she turned back to the TV.

"He sounds boring," she said. Jess laughed, shaking her head as she walked down the hall to her bedroom, thinking that after Jax, boring sounded just fine to her.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

"Jess is going out with that guy again tonight," Lux told Tig as she sat on the floor in front of her floor- length mirror doing her make up.

That night was the night it would be decided whether or not Jax was going to be taking Clay's place as president, and Lux was doing everything she could to not dwell on the fact. It was easier and much less painful to discuss Jess's love life than her own. Tig, who was lying on Lux's bed flipping through the channels on her TV, glanced over at her.

"Oh yeah?" he asked disinterestedly. Lux nodded.

"Yeah, and I don't like him," she said. Tig snickered.

"You've only known him for about 5 seconds," he reminded her. Lux shook her head.

"There's just something about him," she insisted.

"You sure this isn't all about your weird infatuation with getting Jess and Jax together?" Tig asked. Lux glared at him through the mirror.

"I do not have an infatuation about that," she said defensively.

"Yeah, babe, you kinda do," Tig replied. Lux rolled her eyes.

"Only because they're perfect for eachother," she said, "All I'm saying is when he comes over to pick her up I want you to talk to him." Tig raised his eyebrows.

"You want me to talk to him?" Tig asked, "About what?" Lux sighed in frustration.

"I don't know," she said, "Just… get a feel for him. I just can't see this yuppie real estate guy being into the manager of a strip club. At least, not for the right reasons." It was Tig's turn to roll his eyes.

"No guy in the world is interested in any girl for all the right reasons," he said. Lux stood up and turned around to face Tig, grinning.

"Oh yeah?" she asked, "So what are the wrongs reasons you're interested in me then?" Tig grinned, his eyes glinting as he rolled over to open the drawer in the nightstand next to the bed which contained all of her toys that they frequently used.

"Exhibit A," he said and she laughed, shaking her head.

"Bad," she responded, grinning, "Is that all?" Tig shook his head, standing up and opening her dresser drawer where she kept all of the costumes they routinely used during their role playing.

"Exhibit B," he said. She laughed, walking to where he stood by the dresser.

"Is that all?" she asked. He shook his head again, pulling the neck of her tank top back to stare down her shirt.

"Exhibit C," he said. She laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck and standing on her tip toes to kiss him.

"You're sexy when you talk like a lawyer," she said. He lifted an eyebrow, pulling her close to him.

"Oh yeah?" he asked. Lux nodded, grinning, reaching over to grab a tie out of the dresser drawer and looping it around his neck.

"Oh yeah," she said as she tightened the tie. Tig kissed her, running his lips down her chin and to her neck.

"Okay, but afterwards don't forget you need to talk to Craig," Lux said. Tig stopped kissing her, raising his head to look at her.

"Babe, ruining the moment," he told her.

"Oh, right, sorry," Lux said, shaking her head to get back in the right headspace, "Please Mr. Trager, you have to take my case or they'll throw me in jail, but I don't have any money to pay you!" He grinned, lifting her up and throwing her on the bed.

"I can think of a few other ways you can pay me for my services," he growled, taking the tie off and crawling on top of her. She giggled as he grabbed her wrists, holding them above her head as he expertly wrapped the tie around each of her wrists before tying them to the bed post above her.

"Oh Mr. Trager," Lux said, biting her lip in excitement, "What are you gonna do to me?" Tig grinned as he crawled on top of her, kissing her fervently.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess stepped into her heels, giving herself one last look in the mirror. She really wanted to impress Craig tonight and had chosen a red halter dress that showed off her legs. She ran her fingers through her hair again before walking into the living to wait for Craig. They'd talked almost every day since their last date and she was really starting to think she might like him. He was smart, dependable, cute… just what she needed right now.

She glanced up as Tig and Lux walked into the living room, both looking flushed and grinning from ear to ear. Lux was rubbing her wrists as if they were sore, but she grinned at Jess when she spotted her standing in the living room.

"Damn, girl," Lux said, eyeing the dress Jess was wearing, "All ready for your big date?" Jess nodded, checking her watch.

"Yeah, he should be here soon," she said, "Do I look okay?" Lux gaped at her.

"Okay? You look hot," she said, turning to Tig and smacking him lightly on the arm.

"Smokin'," he said in agreement. Jess laughed.

"Where's he taking you tonight?" Lux asked, but the knock on the door interrupted her and Jess stood to get it, glancing over her shoulder to look at Lux.

"I guess we'll find out," she said, smiling as she opened the door and let Craig in. He kissed her lightly, smiling back at her before looking down at the dress she was wearing, frowning slightly.

"Are you wearing that tonight?" he asked. Jess's face fell as she glanced down at her dress.

"I was," she said nervously, "You don't like it?" She briefly noticed out of the corner of her eye Lux smacking Tig on the arm to get his attention, but she focused back on Craig.

"It's just a little… short," Craig said, "And low." Jess frowned.

"Oh, I mean, I guess I can change," she said. Craig nodded.

"Yeah, that would probably be good," he said. Jess raised her eyebrows in surprise, turning to walk back down the hall.

"I will go with you!" Lux said robotically, looking meaningfully at Tig while she jerked her head towards Craig. Tig rolled his eyes at her before waving his hands, shooing her back to Jess's room.

"I can't believe he just asked you to change," Lux said once she'd closed the door behind her, "Are you sure he's not gay?" Jess shook her head, pulling on jeans and a nice top she had hanging in her closet.

"No, he's not gay," she said, rolling her eyes.

"If you say so," Lux said shrugging, "If some guy asked me to change, I would tell him right where he could shove it."

"Well Craig's… different than most of the guys we know," Jess said, feeling the need to defend Craig.

"What? He's ruder?" Lux asked.

"Stop, Lux," Jess said pleadingly, "I really like him. If he wants me to change, it's not a big deal."

"As long as he's just asking you to change your clothes," Lux grumbled.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jess asked angrily.

"It means you shouldn't have to change who you are for some guy," Lux said, "Because who you are is pretty awesome." Jess turned to look at her, having a hard time being mad at her after saying that.

"I'm not going to let him change who I am," Jess said reassuringly, holding her arms out to show Lux the outfit.

"How's this?" she asked. Lux shook her head.

"Jess, if he didn't like that dress I have no idea what he wants," she said, "But you look good, as always." Jess nodded as she hurried back down the hall, walking up to Craig. Tig was glaring at him from across the kitchen counter and Jess looked curiously at him before turning to Craig.

"Ready?" she asked. He nodded, giving Tig one last look before they walked out the door.

"What was that about, you and Tig?" Jess asked. Craig shook his head, shrugging.

"Nothing," he said, "We just don't have a lot in common. I don't see a lot of double dates in our future." Jess gave him a small smile as he opened his car door for her before running around to the driver's side and they were off.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Lux and Tig sat out on the balcony several hours later, watching as the party raged on at the clubhouse, passing a joint back and forth. Lux sat back in her chair, smiling in satisfaction. Church had gone exactly as she had hoped and it had been decided that Jax was now acting president of SAMCRO, until such time as Clay healed, if that ever happened. She had celebrated for a little while with her brother until Tig got in the mood to play secretary and boss and they ran back to the apartment where she had been a very naughty secretary.

"I probably shouldn't mention to Jess that I borrowed her dress for my secretary outfit, huh?" Lux asked. Tig snickered, shaking his head.

"Nah, just get it dry cleaned," he said. Lux laughed, resting her head back on the chair as she turned to look at Tig. This was the first time she'd been able to sit out in the open with him. She'd worried that with the fear of getting caught taken away from their relationship, things would cool off between them, but if tonight was any indication, she had nothing to worry about. Now their relationship could be real.

"So what'd you think of Craig?" Lux asked, taking the joint Tig passed her. What with church and all the excitement that had brought, she'd almost forgotten about the request she'd made of Tig.

"Didn't like him," Tig said. Lux's eyes widened knowingly as she looked at him.

"See!" she said, "There's something about him, right?" Tig nodded.

"Yeah, something about him," he agreed.

"Did he say anything to you?" Lux asked. Tig shrugged.

"Went on and on about his real estate shit," Tig said, "I finally told him I thought real estate was for pussies just to shut him up. He didn't like that."

"He just… he reminds me of this guy I used to date back when… well back before you," Lux said. Tig turned to look at her, his eyebrows furrowed, "He wasn't a nice guy."

"What do you mean he wasn't a nice guy?" Tig asked. If Lux's interest in him was any indication, he didn't think she'd ever dated guys people would consider 'nice.'

"Just… I don't know, he was mean to me," Lux responded evasively as she stared down at her manicure. Tig's eyebrows narrowed further, wondering if he needed to kill someone. Before he could ask any more, Lux looked over the balcony to see Craig's Audi pull up to the front of the building.

"They're back," she said in a hushed tone as she watched them both climb out of the car and walk up the stairs. She waved at Tig to be quiet, even though he wasn't saying anything, as she heard Jess and Craig talking.

"All I'm saying is I think you could find something a little more respectable to do with your time," Craig was saying. Lux turned to Tig with wide eyes as she bent down farther so they wouldn't see her.

"Oh, so suddenly I'm not respectable?" Jess asked haughtily.

"Not working in a place like Cara Cara! I've got a position with my real estate firm as a secretary. It'd be perfect for you," Craig continued as they began walking up the stairs and disappeared behind the side of the building. Lux stood to try and hear the conversation now that they were out of sight.

"I'm not going to be a secretary," Jess responded and Lux heard them stop, thinking they must have reached the front door, "I like my job. I like the people I work with. I don't want to work in an office."

"So what, you're just going to run a strip club the rest of your life?" Craig asked.

"I don't know!" Jess exclaimed, her voice full of frustration, "I don't have the rest of my life planned out! I don't know what I'm going to do. All I know is I'm not going to be a secretary at your firm."

"I think you should reconsider," Craig said, his voice angry.

"Thanks but no thanks," Jess said, and Lux could tell it was taking everything inside of Jess not to start screaming at him, "It's really not your decision how I make my living."

"No, but I just thought you might take more pride in yourself than having a job like that," Craig said.

"You're the only one around that seems to have a problem with my job," Jess replied easily, ignoring his comment, "So maybe the problem is with you."

"The problem is you need to stop spending so much time around people who accept that kind of lifestyle," Craig responded.

"So now you have a problem with my _lifestyle_?" Jess asked.

"Only because you can't see working at Cara Cara makes you look like a whore," Craig responded angrily, "I mean, how am I supposed to introduce you to my friends? This is my girlfriend Jess, she works at a strip club. How's that supposed to make me look?" Lux's eyes widened as she tried to climb over the balcony in a futile attempt to get to Craig, but Tig held her back.

"I'm going inside," Jess responded, her voice catching in her throat, "Don't call me again." Lux turned angrily to Tig, feeling her fists clench.

"I really hate that guy," she muttered as she walked inside. Tig nodded, following behind.

Lux walked to Jess's door, knocking softly on it, but Jess didn't answer. She could hear her sniffling from behind the door and Lux leaned against it, wishing Jess would talk to her. Lux knew Craig was only one big apology away from being back in Jess's good graces and she also knew what she was going to face if she continued on in a relationship with him; she'd been there herself enough times to notice the pattern.

She half-heartedly tried the door knob but it was locked. Sighing, Lux walked back into her bedroom where Tig was waiting for her and crawled into bed next to him, thankful that she, at least, had finally managed to snag a good one.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Lux groaned sleepily, rolling over and throwing a pillow over her ear to try to block out the noise coming from the kitchen. She glanced over at Tig, sleeping soundly next to her and rolled her eyes. Sometimes she thought that man could sleep through a tornado. She sighed, resigned to the fact that she was now awake, and crawled out of bed, making her way to the kitchen.

She halted as soon as she walked through the hall and into the kitchen, staring at two enormous bouquets of long stemmed roses that sat on the counter. It didn't surprise her to see them sitting there; she had been expecting something like this. Roses, chocolates, and a promise that he would never act like that again. She walked around the counter to see Jess bending over and rifling through cabinets. She glanced up when she saw Lux, grinning.

"Do we have any more vases?" she asked. Lux shook her head, eyeing the flowers warily. Jess noticed her looking at the flowers and smiled at them.

"Craig sent them over this morning," Jess said, beaming, "We got in a little fight last night and he sent these to apologize. Isn't he the sweetest?" Jess shoved a card into Lux's hand and she skimmed it quickly, resisting the urge to set the card on fire.

'_Jess, I'm so sorry about last night. I don't know what got into me, but I swear it will never happen again. I really like you and just want what's best for you, but I promise if you forgive me and give me another chance, I'll never mention it again. Please please forgive me. – Craig' _

Lux raised her eyes, staring as Jess skipped happily around the kitchen, trying to rearrange the roses into several smaller vases.

"Aren't they gorgeous?" she asked, sighing as she leaned against the counter looking at the flowers. Lux wanted to answer her with a resounding 'NO' and tell her those flowers were tainted with the worst type of asshole.

"Jess I… I kind of overheard you guys last night," Lux said hesitatingly. She was never one to shy from confrontation, but this conversation was a little more important than finding out who Jess had a crush on. Jess's face fell at Lux's words and she looked away.

"It was nothing, Lux," she said, "You read the card. He won't act like that again."

"That's what they all say, Jess!" Lux said, a note of pleading in her voice, "Every time. Every time it'll never happen again, but it always does and it's always worse the next time. The apologies are a little bigger, and little sweeter…" Jess scowled at Lux, crossing her arms across her chest.

"I don't know what sort of past experiences you're projecting onto me, but Craig isn't like that," Jess insisted.

Lux could practically hear herself saying those exact words, _'he isn't like that'_, a couple of years ago and knew then that Jess would never listen to her. For whatever reason, she was desperate to make this relationship with Craig work and she would continue to blind herself to what was happening. Lux had done the exact same thing. She would just have to take matters into her own hands and figure out a way to make Craig's true nature show itself to Jess before things got out of hand and it was too late.

* * *

**_Author's Note: _Everyone who reviewed - you guys are amazing! I was having just about the worst day ever yesterday and all of your reviews made me smile :) Y'all are awesome. **

**I really hope y'all liked this chapter! I know there wasn't a lot of Jess/Jax interaction but the things in this chapter needed to happen so I tried to make up for it with some Tig/Lux interaction. Please drop a note and let us know what you thought! Remember the more you review the quicker we will update! :)**


	16. Chapter 16

Tara stood at the sink, washing dishes as dinner cooked on the stove and staring out the window in front of her that looked out on the backyard. Jax was running around with Abel and Tara smiled slightly as Jax grabbed Abel around the waist, lifting him up and tossing him over his shoulder, grinning as Abel squealed. He set him down on the grass and Abel took off running again.

Tara returned to the dishes as Jax took off after Abel, a million thoughts running through her head - most that she was too afraid to face. She thought she'd be happy to finally have her family back; she loved Abel like he was her own, but still she wasn't happy. When she and Jax weren't avoiding each other, they were arguing. Even the sex had become mundane and passionless. They were trying to recreate something they'd had ten years ago and it was proving to be impossible.

There was so much distance between them and Tara would love to be able to blame Jax for it, but she knew she couldn't. When they'd agree to try again they'd both put the effort into it, but the relationship was quickly crumbling.

She watched Jax continue to chase Abel around the yard, laughing. It was the first time in a while she'd seen him smile. There would probably always be a part of her that loved him, he was her first love after all, but she was slowly starting to admit to herself that maybe they just weren't_ in_ love anymore.

Jax and Abel finally came inside and Jax helped Abel take his shoes off before walking over to the kitchen, his smile noticeably faded.

"What's for dinner?" he asked.

"Chicken and pasta," Tara replied, gazing over at him. Jax nodded, patting his hand on the counter.

"Sounds good," he said. He paused, rubbing his hand over his face before looking back at her, "I was thinking of taking the day off tomorrow, thought maybe we could go do something." Tara looked back at him before slowly shaking her head.

"I have to work," she replied.

"I thought it was your day off," Jax said. Tara shrugged. It had been her day off, but she'd picked up an extra shift. She'd found herself lately avoiding home as much as possible and she hadn't really been sure why until now.

"They needed me to come in," she lied and Jax nodded, not looking too disappointed. She knew that he was trying to make their relationship work but Tara didn't fully understand why. She figured it was for the same reasons as her – because she didn't want to fail. Again.

"Okay, well let me know when dinner's ready," Jax said before turning and walking down the hall. Tara sighed as she watched him walk away, trying to figure out what she was doing.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

"You havin' trouble?" Luann poked her head into the office at Cara Cara to see Jess furiously erasing something on a piece of paper, frowning heavily.

"I can't get this schedule right," Jess sighed, staring down at the sheet. So many of the dancers had school or kids to work around and Jess was finding it hard to get the right numbers at the right times, and then there were the waitresses and bartenders to schedule as well. Luann walked around the desk and bent over Jess's shoulder looking down at the schedule before she picked up the pencil and switched several names around. Jess stared up at her.

"What would I do without you?" she asked. Luann smiled.

"Luckily, you won't have to find out any time soon," she said, "But I gotta say, having you around has made my life a lot easier." Jess smiled.

"Good," she said, "I try."

"So you doing anything after work tonight?" Luann asked, taking a seat on the other side of the desk.

"Yeah, I think Craig and I are gonna rent a movie or something," Jess said.

"Oh yeah, so you're still seeing him?" Luann asked. Jess nodded, "So how's that going?"

"So far so good," Jess said. She glanced up as Lux rushed in.

"Hey, I just had a ton of people sit in my section. A couple big parties and another smaller table," Lux said, "Would you mind taking the smaller table for me? At least until things calm down a little?" Jess nodded.

"Yeah I can do that," she said. Lux beamed at her.

"You're a life saver," she said, rushing back out of the office, "They're table 24!" Jess looked up at Luann and shrugged.

"I'll share the tips to schedule making another time," Luann said smiling.

"Thanks," Jess said, walking out of the office and up to the table Lux had asked her to take. It was a smaller table, only four men. Most were dressed casually but the fourth looked like he'd just walked off Wall Street in his suit and tie.

"Hi there," Jess greeted, smiling at the men. They turned to look at her, smiling back.

"Hello, Jessica," the sharp dressed man said and Jess turned to him, startled.

"Do I… know you?" she asked, studying his face and trying to place it, but he looked completely unfamiliar. He smiled kindly at her, shaking his head.

"No, but I've seen you around," he replied, "My name is Ethan." Jess nodded.

"Alright, well nice to meet you, Ethan," Jess said, plastering on her usual smile once again, "What can I get you guys?"

After they'd ordered, Jess rushed to the bar to put the orders in and saw Lux waiting impatiently for her table's drinks. She turned to look at Jess and smiled.

"Thanks so much for taking that table," she said. Jess nodded, glancing back at Ethan and his friends.

"Do you know who that guy is?" she asked. Lux shrugged.

"I've waited on him a couple times," she said, "Always takes that same table in the back corner. He's like… I don't know… weirdly nice." Jess laughed, rolling her eyes.

"Being nice isn't weird," Jess reminded her. Lux shrugged as the bartender passed her the tray with her drinks and she lifted it up, scurrying away to her table.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess stepped wearily out of car and walked towards the stairs to her apartment, thankful that she didn't have anything else to do that night after a long day at work besides cuddle up with Craig while they watched a movie. At this rate, she wasn't even sure she'd stay awake through the whole thing. She checked the mail on her way up the stairs to the apartment, rifling through several bills and ads, before getting to a letter sized envelope with her name scrawled hastily across the front. She smiled as she recognized the hand writing and hurried inside to read it.

'_Jess, _

_Thanks for my last letter. I love hearing about you and about your life. It makes my days go by a little easier. I'd tell you what I'd been up to, but it's the same thing every day. _

_I'm happy you like your new position at Cara Cara. I helped Luann build that club and I know how much she appreciates having you there to help. I want you to know that both of us love you and we're here for you if you ever need anything. I know I'm not a lot of help to you locked up and I hate that more than anything, but if I can do something believe me when I say it's done. _

_We know you've had to take care of yourself your whole life and you've done a great job at it so far, but we'd like to do what we can to take care of you now. _

_Looking forward to your next letter. _

_Love, _

_Otto' _

Jess smiled as she read through the letter several times before grabbing a small box from her closet and placing it inside, along with all of the other letters he'd sent since they'd met. She wished they could have a normal relationship, but she thought as far as fathers went, she could do a lot worse. He'd done nothing but make her feel like a welcomed member of their family, and that gift alone was more than anything else he could possibly give her.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Lux sucked down another beer as she paced the entrance of the TM parking lot waiting for Jess and Craig to get home as the usual after church party raged behind her. It had been over a week since Craig had sent the roses and Jess had seen him almost every night since. Lux knew the longer she waited, the more hurt Jess would be when Craig finally showed his true colors and Lux didn't want that. She wanted to protect her friend, but to do that she had to show her the kind of guy he really was.

Lux had a basic plan. Wait here until Craig dropped her off and then bug the hell out of them both until they agreed to come to the party for a little bit. She wasn't worried about that part of the plan. Getting people to do what she wanted was one of her specialties, having grown up learning the skill from her mother. The second part of the plan was to piss Craig off and then wait and see where the chips landed.

This was the part she was worried about. She didn't know what she'd have to do or say to get Craig to his boiling point and she didn't want to lose Jess as a friend in the process. She just kept reminding herself that it was for Jess's own good. That the ends justified the means.

She tossed her empty bottle in a nearby trash can as she saw Craig's Audi pull up to the front of their building. Show time.

"Hey!" Lux called across the street as Jess and Craig stepped out of the car. Jess smiled and waved at her, "You should come to the party!" Jess eyed Craig warily before shaking her head.

"Um no, I think we'll pass," Jess said. Lux watched Craig, who was looking at her curiously.

"Come on!" Lux begged, "Just come have a drink. Bring fancy pants here with you."

"No, Lux," Jess said, and Lux could tell she was getting exasperated, "I don't really think Craig wants to do that." Jess looked at Craig for confirmation but he just looked back at her, eyebrows raised.

"There a reason you don't want me going over there?" Craig asked. Lux smiled to herself. It was happening.

"What? No, of course not," Jess said, "I just didn't really think it'd be your scene." Craig shrugged.

"It's your scene," he said, "I should see what it's all about, right?" Jess was starting to look nervous.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Jess said, but Lux knew it was over. A guy like Craig wouldn't let Jess tell him what to do. If he wanted to come, they were coming.

"One drink," Craig said, already walking across the street. Jess sighed resignedly and followed as Lux clapped her hands, beaming at them both.

"There's the spirit!" she said as they all walked inside.

"Why don't you go get Craig a drink?" Lux suggested, "I'll introduce him around." Jess stared at her.

"Um, no I think Craig should come with me," she said.

"Go get a drink, babe," Craig said, "I'll be fine. I think I can manage five minutes without you." Jess bit her lip nervously, glancing warily at Lux, before taking a deep breath and heading to the bar.

Tara was sitting at the bar and Jess smiled nervously as she walked up. Tara smiled back as she turned to face her.

"Hey, Jess," she said, "Haven't seen you around in a while."

"Yeah, I've just been really busy with work and I started dating this guy," she said, "Lux talked him into coming over here. I'm not really sure about that."

"What? This isn't a normal Friday night for him?" Tara asked jokingly. Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"Not even close," she said. Tara nodded.

"So I wanted to ask you," she said and Jess suddenly got nervous. It was never good when Tara wanted to ask her questions, "You're from Santa Barbara, right?" Jess breathed a sigh of relief as she nodded.

"Yup, born and raised," she said. Tara nodded.

"What'd you think about it? Is it nice down there?" she asked, "I lived in San Diego for a few years while I was getting my undergrad but never made it up to Santa Barbara. I hear it's nice." Jess nodded.

"It's gorgeous," she said, "In another life I might have been happy there, but as it was…" Jess's voice trailed off and she shrugged.

"It's a pretty small town, though, isn't it?" Tara asked. Jess shrugged.

"Not small like Charming," she said, grinning, "A little bigger than Lodi. It's big enough that you can get lost in the crowd a little, but it's pretty laid back." Tara nodded, obviously thinking.

"Why, you thinking of visiting?" she asked. Tara shook her head.

"No, I was just curious," she said. Jess nodded as Tara stood and she turned to Miles, who was behind the bar, and asked him for a couple of beers.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

"So what do you think?" Lux asked Craig cheerfully as she motioned around the room in front of them. It was the usual general debauchery that was expected at a usual SAMCRO party. Stripper pole utilized, crow eaters' mouths utilized, and alcohol fully utilized all around.

"It's pretty crazy in here," Craig responded, obviously disapproving. His tone of voice made it seem like this was exactly what he expected to find behind the door.

"Yeah, you should see it on a special occasion," Lux said, nodding in agreement, "It gets rowdy." She watched as Craig visibly attempted to refrain from sneering and she choked back a laugh as she saw Jax walk by. She grinned at the opportunity and grabbed Jax's arm and he stopped, turning to look at her.

"What?" he asked, annoyed as he removed his arm from her grasp.

"I just wanted you to meet Craig," Lux said, "Jess's new _boyfriend_." Jax raised his eyebrows, eyeing Craig, in his khaki Dockers and button down shirt, with something halfway between disgust and amusement.

"Oh yeah?" he asked, turning back to Lux and completely ignoring Craig, "What the fuck is he doing here?" Lux rolled her eyes playfully, trying not to smile too broadly as she noticed Craig getting angry at the snub.

"Oh Jax, be nice," she said, "I invited them." Jax looked back at Craig.

"Well enjoy your stay," he said sarcastically before walking off towards a table that Opie and Chibs were sitting at. She vaguely noticed Tara leaving Jess's side at the bar and walk up to Jax. Lux turned back to Craig, trying her best to look apologetic.

"Sorry about him," she said, "He's my brother. And the new president. He's probably just pissed because him and Jess used to hook up, like, _all_ the time." Lux faked a look of shock and embarrassment as she covered her mouth, mostly to hide her grin at the rage that had suddenly appeared behind Craig's eyes as they darted over to glare at Jax, "Oh, I shouldn't have said that! Damn me and my big mouth. But don't even worry about it. It's totally over. I mean, except for the time when he flipped out after Jess brought some hang around home. But that was like… I mean… at least a week before you guys got together."

It had been easier than Lux thought. She felt bad about throwing Jess under the bus like that, but she knew that was the only thing that would get Craig angry enough to punch something. Lux's eyes widened as he stormed off towards Jess, screaming obscenities at her as Jess stared at him in shock, cowering by the bar, and it suddenly occurred to Lux that the final act of her plan could involve Craig punching Jess. She really hadn't thought this through properly. She looked wildly around, hoping someone would stop him, but breathed a sigh of relief when she realized Happy was standing by the bar, in between Craig and Jess.

She didn't have long to feel relieved however, before Craig shoved Happy out of the way and grabbed Jess's arm forcefully. Now Lux had to worry about Happy killing Craig. That had also not been part of the plan.

Craig, with a firm grip on Jess's arm, raised his fist back as Jess tried to get away from him, but before his fist could connect with her, Happy turned around and threw a right hook directly into the side of Craig's cheek. He howled, stumbling backwards and wasting the precious seconds he had to defend himself as Happy moved in on him, punching him several times in the face and gut while Jess stood by pleading with him to stop. They had the attention of most of the people in the clubhouse now, all watching Happy kick the shit out of this yuppie stranger.

"Happy! Happy, please stop!" Jess begged, but there was no stopping Happy when he was like this. Lux scurried over to Opie, who was standing nearby looking worried, and nudged him towards them.

"You have to stop Happy before he kills him!" Lux said desperately. Opie nodded resignedly, setting his beer on the table as he hurried over to Happy, grabbing him in a bear hug and tearing him off of Craig. Happy tried to elbow Opie to get him to let go, but Opie didn't until Happy finally calmed down. He shook his arms out before walking calmly back up to where Craig lay on the floor, giving him another kick in the ribs for good measure.

"You never touch me again," Happy growled, bending over in his face before walking away. Jess rushed to Craig's side, bending over to check on him.

"Oh my God, Craig, are you okay?" she asked, looking at his face that was already beginning to swell. He winced, but Lux could tell from where she stood that having his beating take place in front of the entire clubhouse had hurt more than Happy's fists and only fueled his rage. He stood, grabbing Jess's arm again and leaning in so his face was inches from hers, his face twisted with rage.

"Let's go," he snarled, "Now!" Jess stared at him, her eyes wide and fearful and she shook her head, trying to get him to release his grasp on her but his grip only tightened. He turned, pulling her with him and she dug her heels into the floor, trying to stop Craig from pulling her. He turned angrily back to her.

"LET'S GO!" he bellowed. Jess shook her head.

"I'm not going anywhere with you until you calm down," she said, her voice full of fear.

"I didn't ask you what you wanted!" he yelled at her, "I'm telling you we're leaving!"

"You're scaring me Craig," Jess said and Lux watched as Jax walked up behind Jess, looking menacing. She saw the other Sons in the room stand, ready to have his back if they needed to jump in.

"Get the fuck out of my clubhouse," Jax said angrily, and even Lux was scared of him when he was like this, "Jess isn't going anywhere with you." Craig stared at Jax, his eyes moving between him and all the other Sons standing and watching around the room, their arms crossed. They were an intimidating group even on the best of days. He finally released Jess's arm and she shook it, wincing in pain at how hard he had been clutching her.

"I knew you were nothing more than a biker whore," Craig sneered in Jess's face, "I tried to turn you into something better but that's all you'll ever be to anyone. Nothing more than fucking WHORE."

"Out!" Jax barked at him and Craig finally turned to walk towards the door. Jax paused for a second before making like he was going to follow him, but Opie put a hand on Jax's shoulder.

"Don't, brother," Opie said, "He already got his from Happy. Nothing else you can do." Jax pursed his lips in anger before turning back to Jess, but she'd already walked back to the bar, head in her hands and a fresh beer in front of her.

Lux finally walked up to Jess, sitting in the stool next to her. Jess turned to look at her, tears glistening in her eyes.

"Are you happy now?" Jess asked. Lux shook her head.

"No, I'm not happy," she said honestly, "I really wanted Craig to be a good guy for you, I really did. But you deserve to be treated like a fucking princess and I knew you weren't gonna get that from that asshole. I'm sorry about the way it turned out, but I am glad you know who he really is now." Jess sniffled, wiping the tears from her eyes and shaking her head.

"I should've seen it earlier," she grumbled, "He was always controlling like that. Even on our first date. I just…"

"Didn't want to see," Lux finished for her, "I know. I've been there. It's easy to only see what you want to see in people." Jess nodded, turning back to her beer.

"I just wish…" she began, "I mean, of all places for him to blow up like that… and in front of Jax…." She sighed. She was mortified that Jax had been privy to that scene; that he'd had to step up and help her from the guy she'd finally managed to move on from Jax to. That went beyond ironic.

"I'm just gonna go home," she mumbled and Lux nodded, watching her worriedly as she stood from her stool and walked towards the door.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Tara sat in her car in the TM lot, the car running but unable to put it in drive. The thought of going back to their house, well, Jax's house, was not pleasant, but she also couldn't stand the thought of leaving Jax and being separated from Abel. She had no parental rights over him. On paper, she was nothing to him except his dad's old lady. She sighed, but she was jerked from her thoughts by Jess storming angrily out of the front door of the clubhouse, Jax quick on her heels. Neither of them noticed Tara sitting in her car. She rolled the window down slightly to hear what was being said.

"This guy knows where you live. At least let me walk you home," Jax said. Jess shook her head, trying to keep several paces ahead of him.

"I can take care of myself," Jess replied.

"Obviously not!" Jax yelled and Jess spun around to look at him.

"Let me rephrase," she said, "I don't want _you_ to take care of me." Tara watched as Jess turned back around and Jax watched her leave. He didn't leave his spot until he'd watched Jess walk across the street, up the stairs to her apartment and flip on the light in the living room. Tara sighed, watching Jax watching Jess until he finally turned around and walked back into the clubhouse.

* * *

_**Author's Note - **_**wow! We want to thank all of you that reviewed the last chapter soooo much! Words can't explain how much we love you guys! I hope you liked this last chapter. Please let us know what you thought and we just might post an extra chapter on Wednesday! **


	17. Chapter 17

"You know, pretty soon there's not going to be any more work left for me to do," Luann said jokingly as she walked into her office to once again find Jess behind the desk buried in paperwork, this time going through the payroll. Jess looked up, giving Luann a small smile as she ran a hand through her hair.

"Just… you know… trying to help out," she replied wearily. It had been several weeks since Craig turned out to be an explosive asshole and ever since Jess had been spending nearly every waking moment at the club, burying herself in her work and trying to get her mind off of him.

"Anyone ever tell you you work too much?" Luann asked as she walked around the desk, leaning over Jess's shoulder to look over her work.

"I could say the same thing about you," Jess replied. Luann shrugged.

"I live and breathe this club," Luann said, "You should give yourself some time to have a life." Jess shook her head and Luann frowned, "You know, Jess, I really do appreciate all the extra hours you've been putting in, and you've been doing a great job, but I think you should take tonight off. Go do something fun. Or at least go do something away from here."

Jess stared up at her, shaking her head. The last thing she wanted to do was go home early. Going home meant thinking about Craig and how humiliated she'd been by his outburst. She never wanted to show her face at the clubhouse again if she could help it, and working late into the early morning had been the perfect excuse to avoid it.

"Really, it's okay," Jess said, "I don't want to go home."

"I know you don't, Jess," Luann said, "But you need to. You're way too young to turn into me already."

"Turning into you doesn't sound so bad," Jess said.

"Someone who does nothing but work and has no one to come home to?" Luann asked, "You don't want that."

"Sounds easy," Jess replied with a shrug.

"Now you're just depressing me. You gotta face your problems, you're only delaying the inevitable. Go home, Jess," Luann said sternly and Jess sighed, slowly rising from the chair.

"Fine," she said, grabbing her purse out of the desk drawer and slinging it over her shoulder, "But I want you to know… I hate you right now."

"Good, maybe I'm doing this step-mother thing right, then," Luann said grinning at her and Jess couldn't help but smile back, shaking her head.

"Alright I'll see you later, then," she said as she walked out of the office and out of the club, into the daylight.

She pulled up to her apartment several minutes later, smiling as she saw Lux's car parked in its usual spot and hoped she was home and not at the clubhouse. The one downside of spending all her time at Cara Cara was that she hadn't had a full conversation with Lux in weeks.

She opened the front door, stepping inside to see Lux lounging on the couch, flipping through channels on the TV. She perked her head up as she heard Jess walk in and grinned at her.

"You're home!" Lux said excitedly, "Before 3 AM, no less." Jess grinned, throwing herself on the couch next to Lux.

"Yeah, I'm sorry I haven't been around much," Jess said.

"Well there's only one way to make it up to me," Lux said, and Jess knew what was coming. She rolled her eyes at Lux, shaking her head.

"I really don't want to go over there," Jess said, "Preferably ever again."

"Oh please, you can't avoid the place forever," Lux said, "People have been asking where you've been."

"After the scene I caused, I highly doubt that," Jess said, shaking her head.

"That was nothing," Lux said, "Seriously. Nobody even remembers it. Please just come over with me. It's a low key night, we'll just get a drink. Tig's on a run so I won't abandon you or anything."

"Why don't we just have a low key night here?" Jess asked, but Lux stuck her bottom lip out, gazing at her with her puppy dog eyes and Jess laughed, nodding.

"Okay, okay, fine," she said. Lux beamed and hopped up off the couch, Jess reluctantly following behind.

Jess definitely preferred the clubhouse on the slow nights during the week when it was just the Sons and a few hang arounds. The crow eaters that were around were generally clothed and it was all around much more laid back.

They walked through the front doors and grabbed some drinks, waving hello at Bobby, Happy, and Chibs, who had apparently stayed behind on the run, before taking a seat at a table. Jess looked across the room, surprised to see that Jax had also stayed behind and was throwing darts furiously at the board in front of him, Tara sitting several yards away, her back to him. Lux leaned over to Jess when she saw who she was looking at.

"Tara and Jax got in a big fight," she said conspiratorially.

"Oh, great," Jess said sarcastically, "So he's in a terrible mood."

"Don't you want to know what the fight was about?" she asked.

"Not really, but I know you're going to tell me anyway," Jess said resignedly. Lux nodded, grinning.

"According to my sources-" Lux started.

"So your mother," Jess cut in, but Lux ignored her.

"They fought because Tara didn't like Jax defending your honor," she finished, as if she had just revealed the location of Atlantis.

"I didn't like Jax defending my honor either!" Jess said, annoyed that their fight had been about her. She'd tried her hardest since Jax and Tara had gotten back together to stay out of their way, regardless of how difficult it had been, but she still managed to be a source of contention. She didn't like it.

"He gets back together with Tara, proving he doesn't want to be with me, but then he doesn't want anybody else to be with me either. It's frustrating," Jess continued. Lux shrugged.

"So maybe he does want to be with you," Lux said, "This Tara thing can only last so much longer." Jess shook her head.

"No, Lux. I'm like the shiny toy he doesn't want to play with. He just wants me to sit and wait until he's ready to play with me again," Jess said in frustration.

"That's kind of romantic," Lux said and Jess rolled her eyes.

"No, it's kind of awful," she replied, "And completely unfair."

"Well, all I'm saying is he might be ready to play with you again soon," Lux said, and it was clear she was confused about why this new information didn't have Jess jumping for joy.

"What do you expect to happen, Lux? Him and Tara break up and then oh, suddenly Jax is free again and now I have my shot? That ship's sailed," Jess sat back in her seat, chugging back half her beer before placing the glass on the counter again.

"The two of you have to be the most stubborn people I've ever met," Lux said, "Why can't you both just admit you're still into each other and be done with it?"

"It's not that simple," Jess replied, shrugging her shoulders.

"It could be," Lux said, "It's just you two making it more complicated."

"Whatever, Lux, I don't want to argue about Jax anymore," Jess said, "You wanna play pool or something?" Lux shrugged.

"If you don't mind getting your ass kicked," she said, grinning. Jess laughed, shaking her head.

"We'll see about that," she said, knowing it was an empty threat since she was only good at pool if she got really lucky.

"Okay you rack I'll break," Lux said and Jess nodded, bending over to get the triangle as Lux walked to the wall to pick out cue sticks for them.

"Trying pool again, I see," a voice from behind her said and Jess stood up, triangle in hand, to see Charlie, the hang-around that clearly didn't know when to cut his losses, standing there grinning.

"Was just gonna play a game with Lux," Jess said, turning her back towards him as she began racking the balls, hoping he'd get the hint. He didn't. He sidled up behind her, placing his hands on the edge of the table, just outside of Jess's hands and trapping her beneath him.

"I could show you a few moves, you know," he said quietly in her ear. She tried to wriggle out from beneath him but he stood firmly and was much stronger than her.

"God, does this place just turn people into assholes or were you already one before you walked in?" Jess asked in frustration, but Charlie just chuckled.

"Nah, see, you just need to know how things work around here," he said in her ear as she struggled even harder against him. Lux finally returned to the table, scowling at him as Jess looked at her for help.

"You can step away from my friend now," Lux said, but Charlie didn't move. Jess watched with wide eyes as Lux scurried away, running towards the other side of the room that was blocked from her view by Charlie's shoulder. Jess struggled harder against him as he just laughed at her attempts, but she finally managed to turn around and duck under his arms.

He quickly grabbed her arm, spinning her back towards him, the playful smirk wiped from him face. Just as Jess was about to tell Charlie to let her go, the same words were uttered by a different voice behind her.

"Let her go," she heard Jax say angrily and turned to see Lux by his side. Clearly she had run off to get his help, and as thankful as Jess was to have Charlie immediately drop his grip, she hated that it was once again Jax that had to step in and save the day.

"Get the fuck out of here," Jax said to Charlie, "Don't bother coming back." Charlie tried to stammer an apology but Jax continued glaring stonily at him, pointing at the door, and he eventually walked out.

"Um… thanks… for that," Jess mumbled. Jax glared at her.

"How many more guys am I gonna have to kick out of here because of you?" he asked angrily and her eyes widened, "You know, if you're gonna act like a croweater, they're gonna treat you like one."

Jess took a step back from him, feeling as if she'd been slapped. She wanted to yell at him. She wanted to tell him he was wrong. At that moment she wanted to slap the ever loving shit out of him. But she knew where she was. She was in the clubhouse of his motorcycle club, of which he was now the president, and she knew better. But for several moments she stared at him, wondering if it was worth the risk.

She finally sighed, shaking her head as she walked past him, grabbing her purse off the table and stalking off towards the front door. Lux turned to Jax, scowling at him.

"Way to go, genius," she said rolling her eyes, "You do know she never fucked that guy, right? She went home to grab cigarettes and he followed her until she finally had to kick him in the nuts to get him to leave." Jax stared at her for a moment before leaning his head back, staring at the ceiling.

"Fuck," he muttered, turning and running off after her. Lux saw Tara look up at the commotion and follow them, standing in the doorway of the clubhouse to watch the scene play out on the parking lot.

"Jess!" Jax called after her. She was halfway across the parking lot by now. She whipped around to look at him, tears brimming her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Jax said, stopping several yards away from her. Jess threw her arms out briefly as she shrugged her shoulders as if to say 'what do you want me to do?'

"You need to let me go, Jax," Jess said, trying to keep her voice steady through her anger and her tears. She turned away from him, continuing on her path to her apartment, fearful that she would burst into tears when he spoke his next words.

"I fucking can't!" he yelled, his voice full of bitterness, and she hurried off across the street.

Jax stood, watching her go, conflict dancing behind his eyes, not knowing what the hell he was doing. He started to turn around when he saw Tara rush past him, striding to her car.

"Oh, fuck," he muttered, hurrying after her, "Tara!" Tara shook her head as she climbed in her car, but before she could close the door Jax grabbed it, holding it open.

"Where are you going?" Jax asked her. Tara shrugged.

"I don't know," she muttered, "Can I even call it home? Was it ever going to be my home again?" Jax sighed.

"Don't be pissed," he said. Tara shook her head.

"I'm not pissed, Jax," she said, sighing, "I think I've known since we got back together that you were never really mine."

"Tara-" Jax tried to stop her, but she interrupted him.

"I tried to lie to myself about it for a while, I think we both did, but I can't anymore," she said. She looked up at him, smiling sadly at him, "We're kidding ourselves here. I think you know it, too. We just… we don't belong together anymore."

Jax sighed, finally nodding his head and Tara nodded back.

"It's okay, Jax. Really, it is," she said.

"I wanted it to work," Jax replied sadly. Tara nodded.

"I did, too," she said, "I'll pack tonight and be gone tomorrow." Jax stared at her. This was all happening so fast.

"Where will you go?" he asked. Tara shrugged.

"I've got a few options," she said as Jax released his grip on her door and she pulled it closed, driving off the lot as Jax stood there, watching her go.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

"Jess, you got another call on line one!" Jess turned to see Rob the bartender holding the phone out, waving it around.

"Is it Lux again?" Jess called back exasperatedly as she continued running towards the locker rooms, "Tell her I'm still busy! Just like I was the last time she called!"

Jess couldn't remember a more stressful day at work. So far there'd been a bar fight between a couple patrons and two cat fights with girls back stage. She'd been running around putting out fires all afternoon, and to top it off, Lux wouldn't stop calling. She kept telling herself she'd call her back as soon as the next crisis was handled, but there had always been a new crisis.

She got to the locker rooms, rolling her eyes as she saw two of the dancers rolling around on the floor while the other dancers back there continued to get out of their way.

"Jesus Christ!" Jess shouted, "Give it up before I call the bouncer up here and he throws you two out!" The girls got angrily to their feet, glaring at each other.

"This bitch stole my lip gloss!" one of the dancers, Shana, shouted, pointing at the girl she'd just been rolling around with, a dancer named Natalie.

"I did not!" Natalie said defensively, "As if I'd ever wear any makeup of yours. _Whore_ doesn't look good on me." Jess rolled her eyes.

"Natalie, give me the fucking lip gloss or I swear to God you'll be working midnight's for the next two months." Natalie stared at her, obviously thinking it over. Midnight and after were the worst dance slots you could get. By that time, most of the patrons were completely drunk, completely handsy, and completely out of money. She sighed, rolling her eyes as she dug into her bra, pulling out a tube of lip gloss and slapping it in Jess's hand. Jess handed it back to Shana, who smiled in satisfaction and pranced off to continue getting ready for her dance.

Jess walked out of the locker room, shaking her head as Rob called out to her, once again holding the phone out.

"It's Lux again, Jess. Will you please talk to her so I don't have to keep answering the damn phone? I'm getting behind!" he yelled. Jess sighed, walking up to the bar and taking the phone out of Rob's hand.

"Jesus Lux, what is it?" Jess asked, exasperated.

"It's Tara," Lux said, sounding slightly panicky, "She's gone. And no one knows where she is."

"Really? Lux? I'm really busy here. You couldn't wait to tell me this until I got home?" Jess asked, her annoyance hitting an all-time high.

"No, it's just…" Lux began, "She took Abel with her."

* * *

_**Author's Note - **_**I hope you liked this chapter! Within the next 2 chapters Tara's motivations for why she did what she did will come to light and I promise we're not trying to Tara bash here :) Please let us know what you thought! ****  
**


	18. Chapter 18

Jess had never felt emotion like this as she sped through the streets of Charming, desperate to get to Jax's house. She felt so helpless, knowing there was nothing she could do to get Abel back that the club couldn't and the only thought that was going through her mind as she begged her car to go a little faster was why would Tara take Abel in the first place?

She slammed on her breaks in front of Jax's house, parking quickly and climbing out of her car. The driveway was already filled with cars and motorcycles and as Jess ran by them all she figured nearly the whole club must be there. She burst through the front door, looking around the living room to see a sea of leather clad bikers sitting around morosely, some with their head in their hands, others with a beer. The only Son she didn't see sitting around the living room was Jax.

She saw Gemma and Lux huddled together on the couch and they looked up as Jess ran up to them.

"Where is he?" Jess asked breathlessly, looking wildly around the room.

"He's in Abel's room," Lux muttered.

"He's been asking for you," Gemma said, nodding her head towards the hall. Jess stared down the hallway, nervous about what she would find. Jax had always been the strong one. Jax had always been there to save her. What the hell was she supposed to do for him now? She took tentative steps, overhearing Chibs on her way to the hall.

"It's fucking Belfast all over again," he muttered. Jess walked down the hall, pausing in front of Abel's room. She stared at the door, at the colorful sign in front that spelled out Abel's name and she reached up a hand to run her fingers over the name. She knew Tara wouldn't hurt Abel. She loved him. She kept reminding herself that wherever he was, at least they all knew he was safe.

She opened the door tentatively to see Jax leaning against Abel's toddler bed and drinking straight from a bottle of Jack. He didn't glance up as she walked in, but he didn't seem opposed to her being there either so she walked over towards him, taking a seat next to him. They sat there quietly for what felt like an eternity to Jess, and she began to wonder what she was even doing there when he looked over at her and finally spoke.

"Am I a shitty dad?" he asked, his voice slightly choked in his throat.

"What? Of course you're not a shitty dad," Jess said, wanting nothing other than to hold him, all her anger towards him completely disappearing in the moment as she looked at his broken down face and devastated expression.

"Am I as good a dad as Tara is a mom?" he asked. Jess paused, not knowing how to answer that, "Maybe he's better off with tara," Jax continued miserably.

"No, Jax," Jess said gently, "I don't know what Tara was like as a mom, but I do know that Abel belongs here. With his family." Jax nodded, taking another swig of Jack as he stared out at the room.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do here," he said, sounding as if he was speaking mostly to himself, "I don't know how the fuck she could do this." Jess shook her head, leaning her head on his shoulder as they sat there in silence.

She searched her brain, trying to come up with the perfect thing to say to make him feel better, but she came up empty. She eventually figured that there was no such phrase; that the only thing that would make Jax better was to have his son back, and there Jess couldn't help. She didn't know anything about Tara. The few conversations they'd had had been short and she hadn't learned very much about her. She knew that Tara had gotten her undergrad in San Diego, but she figured everyone else must know that, too, and something told her that wherever Tara was, it wasn't San Diego.

"Did she… did she ever say anything about where she might go?" Jess finally asked. Jax shrugged, taking another pull from the bottle of Jack in his hand.

"No," he replied dully, "I asked her where she was gonna go when she said she was moving out, but she didn't tell me. Just said she had some options."

Jess nodded, trying to think about where Tara might have gone, but the possibilities were endless. For all they knew, she could be halfway to Florida by now. In a country of 300 million people, how were you supposed to find just one? Then again, they could also be in Mexico.

"At least… at least you know he's safe with Tara," Jess said, feeling the emptiness of the words as she said them.

"Yeah, I just… I just want him back," Jax responded, his voice low. Jess nodded.

"You'll get him back," she said, her voice showing much more confidence than she felt, "I know it." Jax gave her a half-hearted smile.

"I'm glad you're here," he said and Jess smiled back at him as they fell into silence once more. Jess looked around Abel's room and an immense sadness washed over her as she looked at all his toys, wondering if he'd ever play with them again. She attempted to get into Tara's head, trying to find the reason she would have taken Abel with her, but again came up empty. She just didn't know Tara well enough to take a guess at what she was thinking.

Jess eventually pulled herself up, letting Jax know she would find out if there was any new news and he gave her a half-hearted nod, returning to his whiskey. She walked into the living room to see everyone now in conversation.

"Why hasn't anyone called the police?" Lux asked, clearly frustrated.

"We can't yet," Clay responded wearily, "If we back her into a corner…"

"She knows too much," Bobby finished Clay's statement.

"I don't give a fuck what she knows!" Lux shouted, "She kidnapped my nephew. I want him back!"

"Lux, we report her and the Feds would only too happily cut her a deal to get her off kidnapping charges if she flips on the club," Tig told her, reaching over to grab her hand and squeezing it tightly.

"I'll be the first to say it, then," Lux said, "We should just kill the bitch."

"Relax, Lux," Opie said, "We're not there yet."

"Yeah," Gemma scoffed, "We'd have to find her first."

"You gettin' anywhere with that, Juicy boy?" Chibs asked and Jess turned to see Juice huddled on the floor with his laptop, furiously banging on the keyboard. He shook his head.

"All my searches are coming up empty," he responded, sighing. Jess stared around the room at all the hopeless expressions and knew she had to try and find Abel. She didn't know how, and she didn't know what resources she had that the Sons didn't have. All she knew was that the thought of sitting around doing nothing while Jax was breaking down was unbearable.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess sat at the kitchen table at Rose's, pushing her food around on her plate distractedly as Rose watched her with interest. It had been over a week since Tara took off with Abel and they were no closer to finding them now than they had been. She was beginning to feel as if this would never end.

"Something bothering you?" Rose asked. Jess glanced up, quickly shaking her head.

"No, just thinking… about work and stuff," Jess lied, but Rose clearly didn't believe her. Jess felt bad about lying to her aunt, but she knew the club wanted to keep Abel's kidnapping quiet for as long as possible so the police didn't get involved, and it wasn't as if there was anything Rose could have done anyway.

"Well whenever you want to share what's _really_ bothering you, let me know," Rose said gently. Jess gave her a small smile, nodding.

"Actually I'm kind of tired," Jess said, "Would you hate me if I went home early?" Rose shook her head.

"Of course not," she said, and they stood. Jess helped her clear the dishes and gave Rose a hug.

"Thanks," she said, starting to walk towards the door.

"Don't forget your mail!" Rose called after her and Jess glanced down at the table by the door where a small pile of mail had grown.

"I swear I'll get my forwarding address in at some point," Jess said, turning back to look at Rose.

"Don't worry about it. Gives me an excuse to see you," she said. Jess rolled her eyes as she thumbed through the mail in her hands. Most were bills and bank account notices forwarded from her address in Santa Barbara, but there was a post card in there that had been addressed to her at Rose's house. She picked it out of the pile, smiling at the picture of the Santa Barbara coast on the front. She flipped it over to see who had sent it, but didn't see a name. The card was blank except for the number 44 written across the back.

"Who's that from?" Rose asked. Jess shrugged as she shoved the card back in the pile of mail and stuck it all in her bag.

"Doesn't say," Jess said, "It's probably my friend Katie. She was always sending me weird stuff like that." Rose nodded.

"Okay, well, have a good night. And just remember, whatever's bothering you, things always get better," she said. Jess nodded, giving her a half smile as she turned and walked outside, hoping to God Rose was right.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess leaned over the counter in her bathroom the following night as she stared at herself in the mirror and slowly applied her lipstick, her mind in a million different places. She barely noticed Lux walk up and lean against the doorframe of the bathroom.

"You goin' into work tonight?" she asked. Jess nodded, running her thumb under her lip to wipe off the excess lipstick and looked back at Lux.

"Yeah," she said unenthusiastically. She placed the top back on the tube of lipstick and fingered it in her hand nervously as she turned her eyes down, "I've been meaning to ask… have you, um, have you see Jax at all?" Lux cocked her head at her but the usual Lux all-knowing grin was absent. Jess couldn't remember the last time she'd seen her smile and that, more than anything, depressed the hell out of Jess.

"Yeah," she said. Jess shifted nervously when Lux didn't elaborate, setting the lipstick down and running a hand distractedly through her hair.

"How is he?" she finally asked, "I haven't seen him since… that day." Lux shrugged.

"He's not living off a bottle of Jack in Abel's room anymore," she said, "But I wouldn't call him fine." Jess nodded, pursing her lips as Lux watched her interestedly, "He'd probably like to see you." Jess shook her head.

"I don't really know what I'm supposed to do here, Lux," she said, "I feel terrible for Jax, and I really wish there was something I could do for him. But… that doesn't mean we're suddenly okay."

"You know, for a Pisces you sure do know how to hold a grudge," Lux said, "He's not a bad guy. Really. He's just… bad with feelings."

"Yeah, tell me about it," Jess scoffed, turning back to the mirror to double-check her makeup before she needed to leave for work, "Besides, right now his head is so focused on Abel I could be lounging naked on his bike and he wouldn't even notice, so I really don't think the fact that I haven't seen him is having all that big of an effect on him."

"He needs support right now, Jess," Lux said, "I think it'd mean a lot to him to know he has yours." Jess sighed, leaning against the counter of the bathroom.

"I just wish… I wish there was something more I could do than just offer my support," she said in frustration, "I wish I could help find him."

"You and me both," Lux said, "But the club'll find him. They found him in Ireland, they can find him again. And Tara isn't nearly as good at hiding as those Irish mother fuckers." Jess nodded, remembering Jax briefly telling her how Abel had been kidnapped before when he was only a year old.

"But if you really want to help Jax," Lux continued, "The least you could do is stop by and see him. He's always at the clubhouse, which if you recall is directly across the street." Jess bit her lip, nodding.

"Yeah," she said, "Yeah, you're right. I'll go see him tomorrow. I've got a couple days off coming up." Lux nodded, pushing herself off the door frame.

"Good," she said before turning around and walking out.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess wasn't quite sure how she made it through her shift that night. She had gone through the motions, as she had every other night, but couldn't quite focus on anything. It was hard to care about anything when most all of the people she loved were in such pain.

She walked through the empty club, giving it a weak once over to make sure everything was in place, before turning into Luann's office to grab her bag. Luann was, unsurprisingly, still there sitting behind her desk, and she glanced up when Jess walked in, smiling at her.

"Rough night?" Luann asked. Jess shrugged, reaching into the closet to grab her bag and was about to say good night before Luann spoke again, "Have a seat real quick. I wanted to talk to you." Jess refrained from sighing and nodded instead, taking the seat across from Luann.

"I wanted to tell you," Luann began, "You've been doing so great in your training, I've decided to make it official." Jess raised her eyebrows at her, but didn't say anything, so Luann continued, "From this point on, you are now officially my assistant manager. Training over." Luanne beamed at her and Jess gave her a small smile, nodding.

"That's great, Luann," she said, trying to force some enthusiasm in her voice. Under normal circumstances, she would have been thrilled at the news, but she had so many things weighing heavily on her it was hard to muster. Luann seemed to have suspected as much.

"What's up?" Luann asked, "I thought you'd be a bit more excited." Jess shook her head.

"No, I am!" she insisted. She leaned back in her chair, sighing, "I'm just… upset about Abel and I just feel so helpless. It's hard to be happy when they're all so miserable."

"They'll find him, Jess," she said, "Don't you worry. One way or another, they'll get him back." Jess nodded, but looked unconvinced. It had been the same thing Lux had said to her, and considering Lux and Luann had been around the club far longer than Jess, she wished she could just take their word for it. But she couldn't. The pit of her stomach wouldn't allow it.

"Is it just Abel you're upset about?" Luann asked tentatively, "Or Jax, too?" Jess shrugged.

"I feel terrible for Jax," she said, "I have no idea what he's going through, but I know it's awful." Luann nodded, pausing before asking her next question.

"So… what went on between you two?" Luann asked and Jess's eyebrows shot up in surprise as she squirmed uncomfortably in her seat, "I know you guys got pretty close there for a little while." Jess shrugged noncommittally and Luann took this as permission to continue asking questions, "Do you still have feelings for him?"

Jess stared at her for several moments, wondering how to answer the question. Luann was the closest thing to a mother Jess had ever had, and she didn't begrudge her wanting to know. But the last thing she wanted to talk about, ever again, were her feelings for Jax. Especially since she didn't even know what they were. So she finally told her the closest thing to the truth she could.

"Nothing's going on," she finally said, "He's done some terrible things, _said_ some terrible things." Luann nodded thoughtfully, gazing at Jess.

"But you didn't deny having feelings for him," she pointed out. Jess stared at her again, her lips pursed, as Luann's words resonated through the office, echoing in Jess's mind and she knew. She knew that no matter what Jax did or said, she'd probably always care about him, and the thought did nothing to ease her mind.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess sat on her balcony the next morning, taking small sips of her coffee as she stared across the street at the clubhouse. Jax's bike was parked in the lot, and Jess knew he hadn't left in days. She really should have gone over sooner, and now that over a week had passed she didn't even know what to say to him. She sighed, rubbing her face with her hands before finally standing up and walking back inside to get ready.

An hour later she stepped out of her apartment and down the stairs, noticing that she was taking an extra-long time to reach the ground. She hated to admit it, but Jax still made her nervous in both the best way and the worst.

She stepped tentatively into the clubhouse, glancing around to find it mostly empty. She looked in the back corner to see Juice at his desk running searches on his computer as Jax stood over him, staring at the screen. His long hair hung in drapes over his shoulders and his beard had grown into a tangled mess.

"Did you check Chicago Presbyterian?" Jax asked.

"I've checked nearly every hospital in the United States, Jax," Juice said wearily.

"Check them all again!" Jax yelled in frustration, "And check the day cares nearby. See if any of them have Abel registered. And check the name Knowles, too."

Juice nodded, turning back to the computer to do as Jax demanded as Jax shoved himself away from the desk and strode over to the bar. Jess watched him grab a beer from behind the counter as he leaned against the bar. His eyes were blood shot and rimmed in black and he looked as if he hadn't slept in days. Jess walked tentatively up to him, giving him a small smile.

"Hey," she said as he looked over at her, "I just wanted to check on you… see how you were doing."

"How the fuck do you think I'm doing?" he snapped at her and she grimaced.

"Right… sorry," she said quietly. Jax sighed, rubbing his face with his hands as he shook his head.

"Nah, I'm sorry," he muttered, "I'm just frustrated." Jess nodded, taking a seat on one of the bar stools next to him.

"So no news then?" she asked. He shook his head.

"Nothing. I don't want to get the cops involved; if she gets arrested for kidnapping she could turn on the club but we've just hit wall after wall. It's just all fucked up," he said exhaustedly.

"I don't think she would," Jess said gently. Jax looked at her, giving her a small smile.

"Yeah, well, I didn't think she'd take off with my kid," he said, "And I have no idea where she would go."

"What about where her friends and family are," Jess suggested, but Jax shook his head.

"Nah, we've double-checked every city she's got ties to. She's not anywhere," he said.

Jess nodded, tilting her head to the side as she suddenly recalled her and Tara's last conversation. It had been days before Tara had split and so obvious Jess didn't know why she hadn't thought of it before. She turned quickly to Jax, her eyes wide and her heart racing as she realized Tara had given all the pieces of the puzzle to _her._

"I've gotta go," she said, turning and racing out of the clubhouse.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_**Thank you thank you thank you to all our reviewers! We're so grateful to all of you and thank you so much for taking the time to tell us your thoughts. We will continue to post chapters earlier than once a week if we get a good response on that chapter! **


	19. Chapter 19

Jess ran up the stairs to the apartment faster than she'd ever run before and stormed into her bedroom as she cursed herself for not picking up on the clues Tara had left sooner. Tara had asked her so many questions about Santa Barbara. Hadn't Jess even told her it was big enough that you could get lost in the crowd?

And then there was the final piece to the puzzle. The post card from Santa Barbara she had received at Rose's house. The mysterious postcard with no signature. Nothing but the number 44. How could she not have realized?

She grabbed the pile of mail she'd picked up at Rose's and shuffled through it until she finally saw the postcard. She pulled it out of the pile, confusion and excitement wafting over her. The postcard showed the Santa Barbara coast and in golden cursive letters the words _Beach Side Inn, Santa Barbara, CA _were written across the front.

Without another thought, she grabbed her keys and ran out the door, throwing herself into her car as she sped out of the parking lot and towards the freeway. Every intuition was telling her that Tara had sent her that postcard. That for some reason, Tara wanted Jess to know where she was. She didn't know why, but she had never been more sure of anything else in her entire life. Tara was at the Beach Side Inn in Santa Barbara in room 44.

The drive to Santa Barbara normally took about 6 hours but only 4 and a half passed before Jess was passing through the familiar _Welcome to The City of Santa Barbara_ sign and smiled as she drove through the streets towards the coast. She'd forgotten what a beautiful city Santa Barbara was and wished she didn't have such awful memories plaguing the city. If she was just visiting Santa Barbara for the first time, she'd have a hard time believing anybody could be unhappy here.

Jess drove along the coast following the directions on her phone to the Beach Side Inn, a small but charming Inn that lived up to its name, being right across the street from the beach. Every nerve in her body was screaming as she pulled into the lot, in fear, in excitement, in worry. But she managed to swing herself out of the car and walked into the small lobby where a portly, balding, but friendly looking man stood behind the counter. He smiled at Jess as she walked up to him.

"How can I help you?" he asked. Jess shuffled her feet.

"I was actually going to meet a friend in her room. I believe it's number 44. Can you tell me if a Tara Knowles is staying in that room?" she asked, wanting to make sure her intuitions were correct before barging in on an unsuspecting stranger. The man nodded, glancing down at his monitor and typing in a few keys before shaking his head.

"No, I'm sorry. Room 44 is a Kerry Weaver," he said apologetically. Jess's face fell as the impact of his words hit her. She had been so sure that postcard had been from Tara, hadn't thought for a second she might be wrong. And now she was crushed. She just felt silly having driven all the way down here for nothing.

"Oh," Jess replied, "Well can you tell me if you've got a Tara Knowles anywhere in the hotel?" she asked hopefully, "It's K-N-O-W-L-E-S." The man typed again and shook his head.

"No, I'm sorry," he said, "Are you sure she's not at the Beach House Hotel? It's just a couple miles down the road." Jess shook her head, until an idea appeared to her.

"What about Tara Teller?" she asked, thinking maybe Tara had registered under that name. The man once again indulged her and Jess bounced on her heels impatiently, hoping to see a smile spread across his face. But he shook his head again.

"No, I'm sorry," he said, "No Tara Teller, either. No Tara at all, in fact." Jess sighed. If Tara had really wanted her to know where she was, surely she wouldn't have made it that difficult.

"It's okay," she sighed, hating the idea of returning to Charming empty handed, "Is there a coffee shop nearby?" He nodded.

"There's a Starbucks just next door," he said and Jess thanked him, walking outside into the bright Southern California sunshine, thinking this may be the worst she'd ever felt in Santa Barbara, and that was saying a lot. She felt completely heartbroken at the dead end and was suddenly very glad she hadn't told anybody where she was going. The humiliation of being wrong would have been too much.

She walked next door to the Starbucks, standing in the long line as she thought about the situation. It didn't make sense. All the pieces had aligned perfectly and Jess didn't understand how she could have been wrong. If Tara hadn't sent her that card, who had?

"And why does the name Kerry Weaver sound familiar?" Jess muttered to herself as she stepped up to the counter to order her latte.

"Kerry Weaver?" the barista behind the counter asked and Jess nodded, looking across at her.

"Yeah, do you know her?" she asked. The barista grinned.

"ER's only my favorite show," she said.

"ER?" Jess asked in confusion. The barista nodded.

"Yeah, you know. Dr. Kerry Weaver. She was on the show for, like, 12 years," she said cheerfully. Jess stared at her, her heart thudding in her chest again as she shoved her wallet back in her bag.

"Son of a bitch!" she yelled, turning to run out of the shop, "Cancel my order!" she called over her shoulder as she flung herself out the door and ran back next door to the Inn. She ran through the lobby, not even stopping to smile at the bald man still standing behind the counter, as she ran down the hall in search of room 44.

Of course she would use a fake name. And of course that fake name would be one of the most well-known doctors on the most famous hospital drama ever to be on TV. And of course Jess would have only seen about two episodes of that show in her life. Tara probably expected her to make that connection right away.

She skidded to a halt in front of room 44, staring at the number in front of her. This was it. If Tara wasn't behind that door with Abel, she was just going to have to have a breakdown right here in the middle of the hallway. This had to be it.

She knocked tentatively on the door, stepping back and bouncing on her heels anxiously. She heard rustling behind the door and knew that right then, someone was looking at her through the peephole. It was several more seconds before the lock finally clicked and the door opened.

Tara gave Jess a small smile, leaning against the door frame as she looked at her.

"Took you long enough," Tara said as Jess's heart took a minute to recuperate and begin beating at a normal pace once again.

"Yeah, well….it wasn't exactly like you left me a treasure map," she said, "I only figured out it was you today."

"Well, I'm just glad it's you and not Jax," Tara said wrily, "Or the cops." Jess nodded.

"Well they made it pretty clear calling the cops wasn't really an option," she told her, surprised when Tara frowned.

"Why not? They think I was gonna flip?" Tara asked. Jess nodded and Tara sighed, stepping back to let Jess in. She saw Abel sitting on the floor in the room playing with some toy cars. He glanced up when she walked in, but clearly she wasn't nearly as interesting as his cars and he went right back to playing with them.

Tara sat on the edge of the bed while Jess took a seat in the arm chair in the corner of the room. They sat in silence for several minutes, neither knowing how to start the conversation they were about to have.

"Why me?" Jess finally asked, "Why did you send the postcard to me?" Tara cocked her head at her, shaking her head.

"I thought that'd be obvious," she said, "You were the only person I knew that wouldn't kill me the second they saw me."

"Yeah," Jess agreed, "You really…. You really fucked up." Tara gave her a wry smile, nodding in agreement as she turned to look at Abel.

"I know," she said, "It was rash and impulsive." She turned back to look at Jess, a look of all seriousness in her eyes, "You have to know I didn't take him with me to hurt Jax. I just… I was packing up my car and getting ready to leave and I didn't really have any idea where I was gonna go. My cousin is still in San Diego so I was thinking of going there, but I really wanted a place where no one knew me and I could have some time to myself to just think. And I remembered us talking about Santa Barbara and that seemed like as good a place as any."

"And Abel?" Jess asked. Tara sighed.

"And Abel was there. I was supposed to take him over to Neeta's on my way but as I was driving him over there I just started thinking about how much I loved him. He's become my son. But I knew I didn't have any legal rights to him and I wasn't sure if I was ever going to be able to be a part of his life and I just… panicked. And I kept driving. And I got here and as soon as I got here I knew I'd made a huge mistake but I knew I couldn't take him back to Charming myself," Tara explained.

"Why not?" Jess asked. Tara raised her eyebrows in surprise as she sighed.

"Oh my God, so many reasons. First, I wasn't kidding when I said you were the only person I knew that wouldn't kill me. I was scared. You were right when you said I fucked up. I fucked up big time. I couldn't be sure that I could drive back into that town, drop Abel off, and drive back out alive," Tara said. It was Jess's turn to raise her eyebrows in surprise. She wanted to think Tara was just being dramatic, but she knew the club a lot better than Jess did.

"And second," Tara continued, "Because I knew you would listen to me. You would let me explain. Lux, Gemma, Jax, the Sons… none of them would have cared about a word I had to say." Jess nodded in agreement. That much she knew to be absolutely correct.

"So you sent me the postcard," Jess said. Tara nodded.

"Your aunt's house is listed," she said, "I didn't want Lux to see it in case she figured it out, so I sent it to your aunt's. I've been expecting you for days."

"Well, I'm a little slow I guess," Jess said, giving Tara a small smile, "So what did you want to say that the club wouldn't listen to?" Tara pursed her lips, looking back at Jess.

"You can take Abel back," she said, "I know I can't keep him. But I want to be able to see him. I want to spend time with him. I'm his mother. He calls _me_ mommy. And even if Jax and I aren't together and I don't have any legal rights to him, it would be hurting him just as much as me if I didn't get to see him anymore." Jess nodded.

"So you want me to tell that to Jax?" she asked. Tara nodded.

"I want him to know this was not about hurting him, this was about me loving Abel. I want him to know I had no intention of keeping him from him for even this long. And I want him to agree to let me see him," Tara said. Jess nodded.

"Well, you guys had that arrangement before. I'm sure Jax will just be relieved to have Abel back," Jess said, not all too sure of her words even as she spoke them.

"And Jess… don't tell them where I am," Tara said, "I'm not sure how long I'll be here, but just in case… I don't want anyone knowing I'm here." Jess nodded in understanding.

"And can I get your number?" Tara asked, "So I can maybe check in on Abel from time to time?" Jess nodded, shrugging.

"Yeah, but I don't know why you'd check on him with me. I hardly see him," Jess said. Tara shrugged as she dug around for her phone and Jess did the same.

"Yeah, well, maybe that'll change," Tara responded simply. Jess decided not to ask her what she meant as she continued to dig around in her purse before recalling that she'd left her cell at the apartment in her haste to get down there.

"I'll just have to give you my number," Jess said, "I don't have my phone." Tara nodded as Jess typed her number into Tara's cell before passing it back to her. Tara placed the phone back in her bag as she turned to gaze sadly at Abel before turning back to Jess.

"You wanna walk down to the beach with us?" she asked Jess, "So I can have a little bit more time with him?" Jess shrugged, nodding.

"Yeah, we could do that," Jess said. Tara smiled, turning to Abel.

"You wanna go to the beach, buddy?" she asked. Abel beamed up at her, nodding.

"Yeah!" he said, hopping up and racing to the door like a puppy waiting to be let outside. Jess laughed as she and Tara followed Abel and they all walked down to the beach together.

Jess and Tara watched as Abel ran towards the water, shrieking and running back to the sand as the water splashed around his ankles. He smiled, diving into the sand and digging furiously as Jess glanced at Tara out of the corner of her eye. Jess didn't have any kids, so she had no idea what Tara must have been feeling at that moment, not knowing when the next time you were going to see your son was. What she had done had been wrong and impulsive, but to Jess, it had also been understandable.

As Abel began constructing a sand castle, Tara finally turned to face Jess, a troubled look on her face. She looked as though she was debating something. Jess frowned at her curiously.

"What is it?" she asked. Tara gnawed on her bottom lip for a moment before finally nodding to herself.

"There was another reason I wanted it to be you who found me," she said. Jess raised her eyebrows in surprise, cocking her head curiously at her.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I want you to have something," Tara said, digging into her pocket and pulling out a long silver key. It looked a bit like a skeleton key, but the lever lock was much more intricate. Tara grasped it tightly in her hand, staring down at it for several seconds before her eyes returned to Jess's.

"I don't really know if I'm doing the right thing," she said, "But there's just some ways things work in Charming that I don't think you know about yet and when the time comes I want you to be able to protect yourself." Jess looked strangely at Tara, having absolutely no idea what she was talking about.

"Okay…" she responded, her voice trailing off. Tara sighed, taking a moment to gather her thoughts.

"It's about Gemma," she finally said and Jess nodded, albeit hesitantly, "She… it's not that she's a bad person. It's just that there's nothing she won't do to protect her family, especially her kids, and her position within the club.'

'She's got this huge mama bear mentality, which is great – when she's on your side. But the second she sees you as any sort of threat to changing things, she can get pretty nasty. I had to deal with it a lot back when Jax and I were first starting to get back together, back when Abel had just been born." Jess continued to stare at Tara, having no idea where this was going. Tara finally thrust the key into Jess's hand and she took it, staring down at it for a moment.

"I'm not saying you'll ever need it. I hope you won't. But if you do…" Tara's voice trailed off as she turned back to look at Abel.

"What is it?" Jess finally asked.

"It's a key to safety deposit box 43662 at Charming City Bank. There's some… information in there. If there ever comes a time when Gemma decides you're suddenly no good for her family… it might be useful," Tara said. Jess raised her eyebrows.

"What, so it's like some kind of blackmail?" she asked. Tara shrugged.

"I suppose you could look at it like that. I wouldn't go looking for it if you don't need it. You're better off not knowing. But…. Well, anyway, I'm not going to need it anymore. I thought the torch should be passed on," Tara finished.

"Does anyone else know about it?" Jess asked. Tara shook her head.

"No. I never had to use it. It's just something I figured out about a year ago. Some copies of some forms and stuff. But I can tell you for certain it's not information Gemma would want _anyone_ to know," Tara said.

Jess nodded, throwing the key in her bag and making her mind up on the spot that whatever was in safety deposit box 43662, she would not go looking for it. Information like that just wasn't something Jess wanted. Especially information about her best friend's mom. She was choosing ignorance.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

The sun was setting by the time Jess got Abel loaded up in his car seat in her car and they were back on the road, headed back to Charming. She couldn't believe it. She couldn't remember ever feeling this happy and she was practically giddy just thinking about the celebration that would erupt with Abel's home coming. She cursed herself for forgetting her phone, wanting to call them all right away, but now it would just have to be a surprise.

"You excited to see your daddy?" Jess asked Abel, glancing at him through the rearview mirror. Abel nodded sleepily.

"Yeah," he said, leaning his head back as he slowly drifted off to sleep. She smiled, returning her eyes to the road as she sped down the freeway towards Charming.

The drive home seemed to take much longer than the drive there. She was so excited to get home and reunite Jax with Abel that every mile they passed seemed to take hours. She finally took the exit in Santa Cruz to head inland towards Charming, knowing that meant she had less than 2 hours left.

Finally, at close to midnight, Jess pulled into the lot of Teller-Morrow, her heart thudding in her chest. She glanced back at Abel, who was still fast asleep in his car seat, and stepped out of her car to unbuckle him and take him inside. He moaned sleepily as she pulled him out of his car seat and he clutched onto her, wrapping his legs around her waist and his arms around her shoulders as he buried his face into her neck, falling asleep again quickly. Jess smiled as she carried him towards the front door, now realizing how Tara could love this child so much.

She grabbed the door knob awkwardly, having to work around Abel, and finally managed to walk inside. The mood inside was somber as usual, but most everyone was still at the clubhouse. Juice was still pounding away at his computer with Jax barking orders over his shoulder, Tig was sitting with Lux on the couch, and everyone else was sitting at the bar or at the tables scattered throughout the room, hunched over their drinks.

Everyone was speaking in hushed whispers and as they glanced at Jess as she walked in carrying Abel, a hush overcame the clubhouse as everyone stared at her in shock. Jess smiled awkwardly at them all as she patted Abel on the back. Lux was the first to speak.

"_Holy_ shit!" she exclaimed, jumping off the couch. This got the attention of Jax who glanced up, his eyes finally landing on Jess and then the figure she was holding. He stared at her in shock for several moments before finally breaking out into the widest grin she'd ever seen him wear as he rushed over to her. He took Abel gingerly from her, wrapping his arms tightly around his son as Jess saw a tear trickle down his cheek. He kissed Abel's forehead and Abel blinked sleepily, looking up at Jax.

"Daddy!" Abel said happily and Jax laughed, his voice choked up as he nodded.

"Yeah, buddy," he said softly, squeezing him tightly again, "It's me." He glanced over at Jess, curiosity and appreciation glowing from his eyes. Before he could say anything, everyone else in the clubhouse ran up to them all happily, a smile on every single person's face.

"How the hell did you find him?" Lux asked. Jess shrugged.

"It's a long story," she said, wondering if she'd ever give the full version to her. Lux shrugged off Jess's evasive answer, much more interested in her nephew as she pried him from Jax's fingers and began swinging him around the room as he giggled happily.

Jax watched Lux with Abel for several moments before turning to look at Jess, shaking his head.

"I don't know how you did what you just did and I'm sure tomorrow I'll want to know all the details, but right now I don't even know how to thank you," he said, taking several steps towards her until he was inches away. Jess shook her head, looking up at him.

"You don't have to thank me, Jax," she said, feeling herself getting breathless as he lowered his head towards hers. They held eye contact for several moments and Jess felt her heart thudding once again in her chest. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to jump on him or run away from him, but he made his mind up before she did and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her tightly against him. His lips crashed onto hers and Jess felt herself melting into the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck. He held her tightly against him as he kissed her fervently and she felt herself get light-headed.

But then reality crashed around her and she stopped Jax, pressing her hand lightly against his chest as she took a step back from him, shaking her head. He looked down at her, confused and expectant.

"What?" he asked quietly, his eyes searching her face beseechingly. Jess bit her lip nervously before sighing deeply, flicking her eyes away from his. Their emotions were running high and Jess couldn't stand the heart break again if that kiss turned out to be him caught up in the moment. Because it meant something to her, and she knew that night wasn't the right time.

Not knowing how to explain herself properly, she glanced over his shoulder at where Gemma was now prying Abel away from Lux before returning her eyes to Jax, giving him a small smile.

"You just got your son back," she said, "I'm gonna head back to the apartment. Give you some time with him." Jax just nodded, his eyes narrowed in confusion as Jess turned away from him and walked out the door, leaving everyone in the clubhouse to celebrate Abel's return.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**I hope you liked this chapter! Please as always, if you've got a second let us know what you thought! We really appreciate/love/are obsessed with all the feedback and it's what keeps us going! **


	20. Chapter 20

Jess sat curled up on her couch the following afternoon, staring at a TV movie that was on but hardly watching it. She'd thought that bringing Abel back would allow her a couple of days to just be happy, but after that kiss from Jax, all she was was confused.

She'd been telling herself for months that she'd moved on from Jax. She'd thought it enough times that she was beginning to believe it. But a kiss from any other guy had never made her feel the way she felt kissing Jax. She knew she had been right to stop it; she'd just returned his kidnapped son to him and both of their emotions were running high. If something did end up happening between her and Jax, she wanted to make sure it was real before she put her heart out there again.

She finally pulled herself off the couch, walking out onto the balcony to smoke a cigarette. She knew at some point that day she'd need to go over to the clubhouse to talk to Jax. He'd want to know how she found Abel and she still needed to relay Tara's message to him, but she was delaying the inevitable.

As she sat on the balcony staring out at the lot across the street, she realized the inevitable was coming to her as she saw Jax stride through the lot and across the street. Her heart thudded in her chest. She'd wanted to wait until she was ready to see him again, but it seemed like he was ready now. She stood, leaning over the balcony and he looked up at her, shielding his eyes from the sun.

"Hey!" he called up to her.

"Hey," she replied, "Um, Lux isn't here." She knew he wasn't here to see Lux, but she was still hopeful that maybe he had come with different intentions than she'd thought. He hadn't.

"Yeah, I know. She's still at the clubhouse," he said, "I wanted to talk to _you_. Can I come up?"

Jess nodded, turning around to walk inside as Jax ran up the stairs. She checked her reflection in the mirror by the door, grimacing at her sweats and her hair thrown up in a knot on top of her head, but there was nothing she could do about it now. She sighed, her hand noticeably shaking as she opened the door and Jax walked inside.

"Do you… want a beer or something?" Jess asked nervously as they walked towards the living room. Jax shook his head and didn't sit down, so Jess followed his lead and remained standing as well, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly. The memory of their last kiss played on repeat in her mind and she shook her head, trying to get it out.

"I wanted to thank you again," Jax began, "For bringing Abel back. I don't know what I would've done without you." He sighed, rubbing his hand over his face before turning to look directly into her eyes, "Especially after all the shit I've said to you." Jess gave him a small smile.

"I don't hate you, Jax," she said, "I hated seeing you suffer. I only figured out where Tara was because she wanted me to find her. She knows she made a mistake." He shook his head, taking a step closer to her.

"I don't want to talk about Tara," he said, "Not today. Not now, at least."

"Okay…" Jess said, immediately confused. Hadn't that been the reason he'd come to see her? She watched as he reached into his cut, pulling a small box out of the inside pocket. He held it gingerly in his fingertips for several moments before finally handing it to her.

"I didn't really know how to say thank you," he said, sounding more nervous than Jess had ever heard him. He was always so confident that it threw her off for a moment, "Lux told me you might like a charm for your bracelet so I… I picked that one out for you."

Jess's face broke out into a surprised smile, taking the box from him. She looked at him for a moment as he shoved his hands nervously in his pockets, watching her intently. She finally tore her gaze from his and looked down at the box, opening it slowly. A small gasp escaped her lips as she stared down at the charm he'd picked out for her – a small silver sun. She stared down at the charm for several moments, knowing what it represented the second she saw it, and felt herself begin to tear up. She lifted the charm out of the box, her lips parting in astonishment as she held it up by the small ring it dangled from. She finally looked back at Jax, having no words.

"Because of… you know… the sun rise," he said. She stared back at him, continuing to be at a loss for words. The night they'd watched the sunrise together. The night she'd first fallen for him. After all the events that had happened since, she hadn't thought that night had meant as much to him as it had to her. But seeing the memory of that night dangling in front of her face, a gift from Jax, she knew that it had.

The past eight months flashed quickly through her mind, this time seeing things from his perspective. The time they'd spent together. The fight they'd had after Jess had blown up at him over Ima and his past arrest. How he had expressed his insecurities that she wouldn't be able to handle his life through anger. How he'd gotten back together with Tara soon after. How he'd protected her from Craig and Charlie. How jealous he'd been, seeing her with other guys. The way he'd always looked at her.

She clutched the sun in her fist, walking over to Jax as she threw her arms around his neck, standing up on her tiptoes. He quickly followed her lead, his arms wrapped around her back as he kissed her. And this time she didn't want to end it. This time, she wanted the kiss to go forever. She gripped him tighter, clutching him to her until they finally broke apart for air. Jess looked up at him, smiling, breathing heavily.

"Can we just start over?" she asked hopefully. He grinned, clutching her ass in his hands as he lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist, gripping his shoulders tightly as she kissed him again. He walked her over to the wall, pressing himself against her to hold her up, continuing their urgent kiss. Jess ran her hands through his hair as his lips moved from hers to her neck and she smiled serenely. She felt one of his hands move up her body, slipping under her shirt.

"You know, I said start over," she said, "Not get naked." He lifted his head from her neck, grinning.

"That is how we started," he said. She laughed, leaning her head back against the wall as she smiled back at him. He kissed her again, carrying her away from the wall and down the hall toward her bedroom.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess couldn't remember the last time she'd felt this happy. She didn't know if she'd _ever_ felt this happy. She finally had it all. A job she loved, a family she loved, and a man who she was finally beginning to admit to herself that she just might love. Nothing had turned out at all the way she'd imagined, but she wouldn't trade any of it for the world.

Jess wandered around Cara Cara, stopping by various tables to make sure they were okay and feeling like she was on cloud 9. She saw Lux waiting on a table and walked over to her, unable to wipe the smile off her face.

"How's everyone doing tonight?" she asked cheerfully, looking at the table and noticing it was the sharp-dressed man, Ethan, along with the same men she'd seen him with before.

"Not as good as you, by the looks of it," Ethan said, smiling up at her. Lux grinned.

"Oh of course she's in a good mood," she said teasingly, "She's finally got a boyfriend." Jess rolled her eyes, shaking her head, but couldn't stop smiling.

"Oh really?" Ethan said, his eyebrows raised, "I can hear the hearts breaking all over the room." Jess laughed at him.

"And then when they get married, we'll be sisters!" Lux said excitedly.

"Oh, so the new boyfriend is your brother?" Ethan asked.

"Yes," Jess answered for her, "But we've only been together a week and marriage is definitely not even a possibility right now."

"Yeah, well, it took you two long enough to get together," Lux said, turning to look at Ethan, "They should've been together half a year ago, but they were too stupid to admit how much they cared about each other." Jess felt herself blushing, shaking her head.

"We don't need to bore Ethan with this anymore," she said, "Not when there's money to be spent on naked ladies." Lux grinned as she walked off to grab their drinks and Jess waved good bye at the table as she walked toward the office, having to stop herself from skipping.

"You know, it's nice to see you so happy," Luann commented as Jess walked through the door of the office, "It's about time." Jess grinned, collapsing in a chair on the other side of Luann's desk, nodding.

"You're telling me," she said, "I've never felt like this before. It's kind of scary."

"Because you know it can all be taken away from you at any moment?" Luann asked. Jess nodded, her eyes widening slightly.

"I guess you know how that feels," Jess said quietly. Luann nodded.

"Yeah, I do," she said, "But if you can learn anything from my mistakes, I hope it's to enjoy and appreciate what you've got while you've got it." Jess gave her a small smile.

"I will," she said, standing up and walking back towards the door.

"Oh and Jess?" Luann said. Jess turned around and Luann smiled at her, "I'm happy for you."

"Thanks…. Mom," Jess said and Luann's smile widened as Jess turned to walk back into the club.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess sat at her desk in the office, watching the lights turn on in the club to signal closing time and she smiled, grabbing her purse and walking out of the office. Before she and Jax had gotten together, she dreaded closing time. Things had been so complicated between them and between her and the club that she hated being home where all she had to do was dwell on the fact. Now, though, things were different. She couldn't wait to get off work and finally see Jax again.

She didn't have to wait long to see him that night. As she walked out the door of Cara Cara she could see him leaning against his bike in the parking lot smoking a cigarette. Her smile widened as she ran up to him and he tossed his cigarette aside before taking her into his arms, kissing her in greeting.

"How was work?" he asked.

"Fine," she replied, "What are you doing here?" He shrugged.

"Waiting on you," he answered, stating the obvious. She grinned, her arms still wrapped tightly around his waist. He reached behind him, grabbing his helmet and handing it to her. She let go of him, grabbing the helmet and looking at him curiously.

"I've got my car here," she said. He shrugged.

"We'll get it later," he said, "I want you to come on a ride with me." She grinned, nodding as she bucked the helmet on before climbing on the back of the bike behind him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his waist and they sped off.

They drove for a couple of hours toward the coast, finally stopping at a scenic point in Point Reyes, where large cliffs met the ocean. Jax waited for Jess to climb off the bike before he did and he walked with her to the edge of the cliff, overlooking the ocean. They sat on the grass, staring out at the horizon for several minutes before Jess finally looked over at him.

"You know, you still haven't asked me how I found Abel," she told him. She'd been waiting for him to bring up the conversation every day for the past week, waiting to talk to him about Tara's request, but so far he had avoided the subject of Tara like the plague. He looked down at her, nodding.

"No, I haven't," he replied. She stared at him, waiting for him to elaborate and he took a deep breath, "I didn't want to talk about Tara. Not when we've just started… whatever this is."

"We have to at some point," Jess said. Jax shrugged, nodding.

"Okay," he said, relenting, "So how did you find Abel?"

"Tara sent me a postcard," Jess replied and Jax raised his eyebrows in surprise, clearly not expecting that answer, "It was cryptic, but once I'd figured it out, it told me where she was staying."

"And where was that?" Jax asked.

"I can't tell you that," she said and Jax narrowed his eyes at her. She shrugged, "I promised I wouldn't tell you where she was. She wanted some time to… figure things out. And she's scared." Jax snorted, shaking his head.

"Yeah, she should be," he muttered. Jess sighed. She knew better than to expect Jax to be able to forgive and forget, but she'd hoped waiting a week to bring it up would help soften some of his resolve.

"She asked me to talk to you about some things," Jess said a little nervously.

"What?" Jax asked.

"She wants to still be able to see Abel," Jess told him. Jax rolled his eyes, staring out at the ocean. The sun wouldn't be rising for another hour so it was still dark around them and Jess was having a hard time reading his expression.

"She's not his mother," he finally replied.

"She's the closest thing he's got," Jess said gently. When he turned to look at her in disbelief she added, "You know it's true." Jax sighed, wrapping his arm around Jess's shoulder and bringing her close to him. She laid her head on his chest, listening to his heart beat and feeling the steady rise and fall of his breathing.

"Yeah, she can see him," he muttered, "But I don't want to see her. That wouldn't be good for anybody. And she's gonna have to wait. It's not a good time right now." Jess nodded, deciding not to argue. That was actually a better outcome than she'd thought.

"Thanks, Jax," she said quietly. He turned his head to look down at her and she lifted her head from his chest. He leaned down, kissing her softly.

"No more talking about Tara," he murmured, continuing to kiss her as he leaned her back in the grass, settling himself on top of her. She grinned up at him, their legs intertwined and her hands running through his long hair.

"Okay," she agreed in a whisper, giggling as she felt his hands moving up and down her body.

"This is a public place," she reminded him. He lifted his head, looking around at the completely deserted cliffside.

"Tonight it's not," he whispered, his lips moving down her neck just as the sun began to peek out above the horizon. This was going to be one sunrise that they would not be watching.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess and Lux sat on the balcony at the apartment the next night after work sipping on cocktails, both in high spirits. They were planning on going over to the clubhouse soon to see Jax and Tig, but the girls decided to have a much needed drink together before heading over.

"I'm glad you're finally back home, at least for one night," Lux said teasingly and Jess grinned, shrugging. She'd been spending every night since Jax gave her that charm at his house, but it felt nice being back home. She stared down at the bracelet on her wrist, playing with the sun charm in between her fingertips.

"We've had to make up for a lot of lost time," Jess said, giggling. Lux laughed, shaking her head.

"When will people learn that they should just listen to me the first time around?" she asked, "Well, now you know. I'm always right."

"How could I have ever made such a mistake?" Jess asked mockingly. Lux chuckled, curling up on the chair she was sitting in and leaning her head back against the head rest.

"God I'm glad you gave Jax another chance," Lux said, "He gets so grumpy when he's not getting laid." Jess laughed, shaking her head.

"You guys seriously have a weird relationship," she said, grinning. Lux shrugged, taking a sip of her drink before finally nodding in agreement, "And what do you mean, not getting laid? When's the last time he spent a night alone?" Lux shrugged.

"He hasn't been with anyone else since Tara split. Not until you, anyway," Lux told her. Jess raised her eyebrows in surprise. She knew Jax had always had his pick of croweaters, and the short amount of time that he was single for the first time since becoming president, she'd assumed they'd be flocking all over him.

"I think you're gonna be really good for him," Lux said happily, "I can feel it. He needs someone like you."

"And what am I like?" Jess asked.

"You know, someone that'll call him on his bullshit but be there for him when he really needs it," Lux replied. Jess nodded thoughtfully, taking a sip of her drink.

"Yeah, I guess I am kind of like that, huh?" she asked. She turned her head, frowning as she leaned forward to look between the bars of the balcony.

"What are you looking at?" Lux asked her. Jess nodded to the street where a black town car was driving slowly by, its headlights turned off. Lux's eyes widened as she jumped up from her chair, her drink tumbling out of her hand. Glass shattered everywhere, but Lux barely seemed to notice as she grabbed Jess's shoulder, jerking her up.

"We need to get inside!" she yelled, "NOW!"

Jess didn't need Lux to tell her twice. Lux flung the glass door open and ran inside, Jess following close on her heels as gunfire erupted all around them. Jess's body lurched as a bullet pierced her belly. She clutched her side to see blood beginning to ooze through her tshirt as she felt all the wind get knocked out of her when a second bullet pierced through her abdomen. She felt as if everything was happening in slow motion as she looked up to stare at Lux, raising her blood-drenched hand in shock.

"JESS!" Lux screamed, grabbing Jess by the shoulder and pulling her to the ground. Lux threw herself on top of Jess as glass from the floor to ceiling windows rained down around them. Lux winced as she felt several shards of glass pierce her back and she raised her arms to protect her head. Almost as soon as it had started, there was silence, apart from the sound of burning rubber as the car sped away.

Lux crawled off of Jess, kneeling down to look at her as a pool of blood began to spread outwards from her body. She wanted to scream and cry, but most of all she just wanted Jess to be okay. She didn't know if it was possible with the blood lost already, and she knew enough about gunshot wounds to know she had to be bleeding internally as well.

"Don't worry, Jess," Lux said, trying as hard as she could to keep her voice strong and steady, "We'll get help. You're going to be okay."

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax walked out of the doors of the clubhouse, lighting a cigarette and looking up to see a friendly sparring match going on between Chibs and Happy. He grinned, pocketing his lighter and shaking his head as Chibs let Happy get an easy punch in.

"He's kicking your ass!" Jax called out, laughing as he walked over to join Opie and Tig on the picnic bench.

"So what's everyone doing tonight?" Opie asked. Jax took a drag of his cigarette, grinning at his friend.

"Jess is coming by soon," he said. Opie turned to Tig.

"Lux is coming by," Tig said.

"Great, so I guess we won't be hanging," Opie muttered, just as the sound of gunfire echoed around them.

"GET DOWN!" Jax shouted as everyone outside immediately hit the floor. It was over soon and Jax glanced up to see a black town car speeding away. He jumped up, ripping his gun from his ankle as he ran off after them, but they were long gone by the time he got to the street. He cursed angrily as he jogged back to the clubhouse, looking around.

"Everyone okay?" he asked, looking around to see them all slowly getting to their feet. Tig dusted his jeans off, looking around worriedly.

"Nothing was hit," he said, his voice trailing off as he saw something behind Jax's back that caused his eyes to widen and he took off, sprinting across the lot.

"LUX!" Tig screamed, his voice full of panic. Jax wheeled around, looking up at Lux and Jess's apartment to see the living room brightly lit and the entire wall, which had been floor to ceiling windows, completely shattered. The color drained from his face as he took off quickly after Tig, the others not far behind him.

He ran in to see Lux clutching Jess, who was clearly fading. Her eyes were closed and she didn't look like she was moving. Lux stood, covered in blood, as Jax rushed over to her.

"I don't… I didn't know what to do," Lux said, watching as Jax kneeled beside Jess, clutching her face in his hands. Lux finally turned, rushing to Tig and collapsing into his arms. Tig kissed her forehead in relief before clutching her tightly to him, both of them watching as Chibs ran up to Jess, kneeling beside her and looking over her wounds.

"Someone, call 911!" Chibs yelled as he ripped off his shirt, placing it tightly over one of the bullet holes, "Grab me that towel from the kitchen," he ordered Jax, who immediately rushed into the kitchen and grabbed a towel hanging from the oven.

"Put pressure on that wound," Chibs said when Jax returned, nodding to the bullet hole farther up her chest. Jax nodded, doing as he directed before looking back at Chibs expectantly.

"It doesn't look good, Jax," he said, quiet enough for no one but Jax to hear. Jax swallowed hard, feelings his nostrils flair and his jaw clench as he bent over Jess, tenderly brushing the hair out of her face and running the back of his fingers softly over her cheek as he held the towel tightly to the wound.

"She's gonna be okay," he said forcefully, trying to convince himself as much as everyone else. She had to be okay.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**Sorry this is posted a little later than usual! I was out of town all weekend and only just got back. **

**Thank you all so so much for reading and especially for reviewing! I really hope you liked this chapter. Please let us know what you thought! The better feedback we get, the better the story will be and the sooner we will post the next chapter! **


	21. Chapter 21

Jax was still bent over Jess when the paramedics arrived, panic and confusion swarming his mind. How did this even happen? _Why _did this even happen? And most importantly, who the _fuck_ did this? Because whoever it was, they had just signed their own death certificate. The paramedics pushed him to the side and Jax stood, walking over to where Lux and Tig stood. He watched the paramedics check over Jess before loading her onto a stretcher.

"You need to get checked out, too," Jax heard Tig say, and finally tore his gaze from Jess to look at his sister.

"I'm fine!" Lux insisted.

"You got glass sticking out of you all over," Tig said, "You're going."

"I'm fine," Lux repeated, turning to her shoulder to pull a shard of glass out of her skin. Jax cringed at the sight of Lux's hands, covered in blood, before he looked down at his own bloody hands.

"Listen to Tig, Lux," Jax said wearily, "Get checked out. I don't need to be worried about both of you." Lux sighed, finally nodding.

"Okay," she assented. She turned to look at her brother, reaching her hand out and clutching his arm, "She's going to be fine, Jax." The words sounded empty even as she spoke them, but Jax held onto them, nodding.

"Yeah," he said as the paramedics began loading the stretcher with Jess on it down the stairs.

"Alright, meet me at the hospital," Jax said, following the paramedics. He turned back to look at Tig, "Make sure she sees a doctor," he said, pointing at Lux. Tig nodded as Jax raced down the stairs and across the street to his bike.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax burst through the front doors of the ER, striding up to the front desk as a woman looked up at him from behind her computer, her eyes widening slightly at the sight of the angry biker covered in blood storming towards her.

"Jessica Tyler," he barked at her and she quickly typed the name into her computer before looking back up at him.

"She's being prepped for surgery," the woman told him, "It could be several hours until we know anything." At the sight of Jax's nostrils flaring, she added, "But I'll go tell the nurses you're here so the doctor will know to come out when there's any news."

Jax finally nodded at her, glancing down at the blood still caked on his hands as he walked into the bathroom to wash it off. He stared at his weary and worried face in the mirror as the water running down the drain turned red. Once his hands were clean, he splashed some water on his face, hoping it would help the nightmare running through his mind, but it didn't.

He walked out of the bathroom just as Tig and Lux walked through the front doors, Opie not far behind them. Opie walked up to Jax as Tig pulled Lux toward the front desk to get checked in.

"I got Chibs settin' up meets with Alvarez, Salazar, LeRoy, and Darby," Opie told Jax as they each took a seat in the waiting room, "See if we can figure out if it was one of them, or at the very least if they've heard anything." Jax nodded, thankful to have a VP on top of things when all Jax wanted to do was punch the hell out of something.

"I've also got Juice doing the usual whatever-the-hell-it-is he does," Opie said, "We'll figure this out, brother." Jax nodded, knowing Opie was right because Jax would not rest until who ever had done this was in the ground.

"Did you call ma?" he asked. Opie nodded.

"Yeah, she said she'd get a hold of Luann and Jess's aunt, too," he said, "So… any news?" Jax shook his head, standing up to pace the waiting room and get some of his energy out before he completely exploded.

A nurse walked Tig and Lux through wide double doors that led into the ER and several minutes later Gemma, Clay, Luann, and Rose ran through the front doors into the waiting room, running up to Jax.

"How's Lux?" Gemma asked desperately.

"She's fine," Jax grumbled, "Just got some glass being taken out of her."

"What about Jess?" Luann asked, her voice panicky as Rose stood near her, looking close to tears as she eyed the blood covering Jax's shirt and jeans, "How is she? What happened? What's going on?"

"I don't know!" Jax bellowed at her, refusing to feel guilty as her face fell, "She was fucking shot. Twice. She's in surgery. That's all I know." Rose's face fell as she stared at Jax, shaking her head and walking away to take a seat on a chair.

Tig walked quickly through the doors from the ER and back into the waiting room, looking at Jax.

"Hey, I need to go grab Lux some clothes. They're full of glass. Will you go wait with her? She looks like she's about to punch someone if a doctor doesn't get to her soon," he said. Jax sighed in frustration, nodding as Tig hurried out of the hospital and Jax rose to walk back into the ER.

Lux wasn't hard to find. She was impatiently pacing the door of her room wearing a hospital gown, yelling at every nurse that passed her by.

"Hello!? Can you hear me?! Yeah, you! When the hell is the doctor going to be here?" She barked at a poor nurse who simply shrugged and scurried away. Lux saw Jax walk up to her and she scowled as she walked back into her room and climbed on the bed.

"This is ridiculous, Jax," she said, "They're taking forever. I can't get a doctor in here to save my life, no pun intended. Chibs coulda done this faster."

"Well there's no rush," Jax sighed, throwing himself into the chair next to her bed, "It's going to be a couple of hours before there's any news on Jess." Lux reached over, grabbing a hold of his hand and he allowed her to. They sat like that in silence until a doctor finally walked in, smiling at Lux over the chart she held.

"Hi Lux, I'm Doctor McNeely," she said cheerfully, "Looks like I'll be removing glass from you today." Lux scowled at the doctor's happy demeanor, glancing over at Jax as if to say '_You think this nut job is gonna do a better job than Chibs?' _But she allowed Dr. McNeeley to check her over before having her lie on her stomach to pick out the glass.

Tig walked into the room, holding a bundle of clothes for Lux and Jax stood, allowing Tig to take his place as he walked back into the waiting room. Everyone was now sitting, their heads in their hands, and Gemma glanced up as Jax walked in.

"How's Lux?" she asked. Jax shrugged.

"She's fine, ma," he said exasperatedly, "I told you." Gemma nodded, glancing next to her at Luann.

"Okay then, I'm gonna go over to the girls' apartment. See what the damage is," she said.

"I don't know how you can worry about something like that at a time like this," Luann said and Gemma shrugged, standing and grabbing her bag.

"Well the girls are certainly in no condition to worry about it, and the Sons have more important things to deal with with this whole situation. So it falls to me," Gemma said, but Jax knew why she was so insistent. Just as his MO when he was panicked was to get angry, Gemma's was to try and fix whatever she could. She walked over to Jax, kissing him gently on the cheek as she squeezed his arm reassuringly.

"You have someone call me as soon as there's any news," she said, looking at him imploringly, "She's going to be okay, Jax." Jax nodded as Gemma turned and walked out of the front doors as he collapsed into an empty chair, his head in his hands.

Jax didn't know how long he sat there. It felt like days. Lux had come out of the ER long ago and was now stretched out across several chairs, her head in Tig's lap as she stared blankly at the ceiling. Not a single word had been spoken in that room in hours and just as Jax was about to stand up, walk into the ER, and demand some answers, a doctor walked out, looking at them all.

Jax rushed up to him, followed closely by Luann, Rose, and Lux, and he gave them all a small smile.

"Jess Tyler?" the doctor asked, and they all nodded eagerly.

"I'm Dr. Webb," he said, "I operated on Ms. Tyler. We have her out of surgery and she's stabilized." Jax felt his breath release in relief. Stabilized was good. Stabilized meant still alive.

"How is she?" Rose asked quickly.

"Well she's not out of the woods yet, but she's doing better than expected," he replied, "I'm optimistic." Rose nodded, clutching her hand to her heart.

"Thank God," she murmured.

"When can we see her?" Jax asked.

"She's resting now, but I'll be able to allow a few of you in at a time in a little while," he answered.

"So what happened with the surgery?" Lux asked. Dr. Webb looked around at the small group gathered around him.

"Are any of you immediate family?" he asked.

"I'm her aunt," Rose spoke up quickly. Lux scowled.

"We're _all _her family," Lux replied haughtily. Dr. Webb looked at her sympathetically.

"I'm sorry, I can't release any information about the specifics of the surgery except to a spouse or blood relative. Not until I get the patient's consent," he said.

"I'm a blood relative," Rose said insistently and the doctor nodded, motioning for her to follow him back into the ER. Jax sighed, running a hand through his hair as he turned around angrily, his mood darkening at the sight of Sherriff Roosevelt striding through the front doors and into the waiting room, walking straight towards Jax.

"Jax," he said in greeting.

"Sherriff," Jax replied coolly, scowling at him, "What are you doing here?"

"Got a call in about a GSW," he replied, "You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?" Jax rolled his eyes away from the Sherriff, shaking his head. Roosevelt's eyes narrowed as he studied Jax.

"That's funny, 'cause I was pretty sure the name that came across my radio was the name of your new girl," he said. Jax returned his eyes to the Sherriff, narrowing them. Roosevelt shrugged, "It's a small town, Jax. Word gets around fast."

Jax took a moment to process the words, his eyes narrowing at the revelation. It had been so soon after he and Jess had gotten together, he'd assumed the target had been Lux. Lux's relationship to the club had always been common knowledge, and Jax had figured Jess had just gotten caught in the crossfire. But if word had already reached Roosevelt… then maybe this attack wasn't just against the club. Now Jax felt like it was personal attack meant to hurt him. But who was still around that worked that way? Who was around that targeted Old Ladies to get to the men behind them?

"Jax," Roosevelt said, looking curiously at him and shaking Jax from his thoughts. Jax turned back to glare at him, "You sure you don't know who did this?"

"If I did, I'd be there right now!" Jax yelled loudly at him, frustration and rage that he had no idea who had done this coursing through him.

"Don't do anything stupid," Roosevelt warned him and Jax scoffed, shaking his head.

"Yeah, you tell me that when two of the most important women in _your _life have been in the hospital on the same night," he said. Roosevelt sighed.

"You let the law work," he said, "We're on the same side of this one."

"Wouldn't dream of doing anything else," Jax sneered and Roosevelt pursed his lips, knowing that was about as close to assurances as he would be getting from Jax.

"Alright, well you let me know if you hear of anything," Roosevelt said.

"Got your number on my speed dial," Jax said sarcastically and Roosevelt sighed again, walking back out of the waiting room. As soon as he was gone, Jax stalked up to the front desk, grabbing a pen and a piece of paper from the woman behind the desk and marched over to Lux, who was still laying down on her back, and slapped the paper and pen onto her stomach. She glanced up at him, surprised, as she clutched the paper to her chest and sat up.

"I want you to write down the name of everyone you can think of that you've been running your mouth to this last week about Jess and I," he said darkly. Lux raised her eyebrows, nodding slowly.

"I wasn't aware that was privileged information," she spat at him, not liking the accusatory tone in his voice.

"Just do it!" Jax yelled and Lux sighed, nodding as she started writing.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Rose followed Dr. Webb into a small office inside the ER and sat down in a chair nervously as Dr. Webb took a seat behind a desk. He looked across at her, getting directly down to business.

"Jess was shot twice. Once was a clean shot through the spleen. We had to remove part of the spleen, but were able to keep most of the organ," he said. Rose looked at him with wide eyes, her eyes brimming with tears as she clutched a hand to her heart, nodding, "Which is good news," Dr. Webb added quickly, "She shouldn't see any sort of side effects with only a partial spleen, though she may become more prone to infections. We've got her on antibiotics now but she shouldn't have to take them regularly like she might have if we'd removed the entire spleen."

Rose nodded, knowing the doctor wasn't finished and praying to God that it didn't get worse.

"The other bullet was a bit more problematic," he said carefully, "It was lodged in her uterus. We were able to remove it, but the uterus was severely damaged." Rose nodded, taking a deep breath.

"So what does that mean?" she asked.

"It means the possibility of her being able to conceive is extremely slim," he said gently.

"Slim?" Rose repeated, not liking the feel of the vague word, "How slim?" Dr. Webb shrugged as he pulled out several MRI scans, laying them across the desk in front of Rose. With a pen he pointed out several areas on the scan.

"See these marks here?" he asked and Rose nodded as she stared down at the scan, "The bullet hit right there, which is just beside the fallopian tube. Due to the retrieval of the bullet, there will be scarring there that will build up, blocking the entrance to the uterus from the fallopian tube. It will be difficult for an egg to get past the blockage."

"How difficult?" Rose repeated. She felt as though Dr. Webb was dancing around the severity of the situation.

"We're talking about a _very_ small number of women with similar issues that are able to conceive," Dr. Webb explained.

"But... then there's still a chance?" Rose asked in a whisper. Dr. Webb pursed his lips, looking back at Rose sympathetically.

"I… _suppose_," he said, "But without fertility treatment or some sort of intervention, the likelihood of conceiving naturally is almost zero." Rose's lip trembled as she nodded, blinking back the tears that were threatening to fall in sympathy for her niece.

"Can I… Will you let me tell her?" she choked, "Whenever she wakes up?" Dr. Webb frowned, but nodded.

"Are you sure?" he asked. Rose nodded, wiping her eyes.

"I don't want her to hear it from a stranger," she said, sniffling and Dr. Webb nodded again.

"Okay then," he said, rising from his desk. Rose stood as well, shaking his hand.

"Thank you, Doctor," she said, "For saving her life. I can't tell you…" he voice trailed off as she ran out of words, not wanting to think about any other options. He nodded, smiling at her.

"Of course," he said, leading Rose back into the ER waiting room.

Jax stood quickly as soon as she walked back in and she shook her head wearily, taking her seat once more. Jax followed her, Lux glancing up to watch them.

"I knew it would be dangerous," Rose muttered to Jax, looking up at him, "Her getting involved with you. I'd hoped you'd do a better job protecting my niece."

"There was nothing I could have done," Jax said, anger and desperation in his voice and Rose nodded, shrugging.

"That scares me even more for her," she said, sighing.

"What did the doctor say?" Jax asked. Rose hesitated. She knew her niece well enough to know she wouldn't want the whole world knowing her business before she even did. Rose shook her head.

"I'd like to tell Jess first, when she wakes up," Rose said.

"Good God, Rose!" Lux yelled, "Just tell us what the hell is going on!" Rose looked all around her, knowing she wouldn't be able to completely get out of this, so she decided to tell them half the story.

"They had to remove part of her spleen," Rose explained.

"Oh God," Lux moaned, "I don't even know what that is." She looked wildly around, jumping up as a man hurried past them in a white lab coat.

"Hey you!" she called out to him and he halted, turning to look at her, "Can you still drink if you've only got part of your spleen?" she asked. He nodded.

"Sure," he said before hurrying on his way again. Lux grinned.

"Thank God!" she said, and Tig laughed, but Jax just glared at her.

"Lux," he said warningly, but she just shrugged.

"Sorry big bro," she said, "You can deal with shit with your angry-Jax-serious-face, but some of us need to lighten up a little." Jax sighed heavily in frustration, taking his seat again as he waited for the doctors to let him into Jess's room.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess blinked groggily, looking around at her surroundings and trying to recall where she was, but it was all a blur. It looked like a hospital room, but she didn't remember being brought to the hospital. She glanced down at her hand as she realized someone was holding it and smiled as she saw Jax hunched over, gripping her hand tightly as he slept. She shifted her weight on the bed, gasping as a shooting pain went through her belly and suddenly it all came back to her.

"Ow!" Jess said, clutching her free hand to her belly and Jax perked his head up, frowning as Jess winced in pain.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Moving," Jess replied grumpily.

"Well don't do that," Jax said, "Does something hurt? Do you need a nurse?" He was halfway out of his chair before Jess strengthened her grip on his hand, shaking her head.

"No, Jax, I'm fine," she said. He paused, finally sitting down again and bringing her hand to his lips, kissing her fingers gently.

"What happened?" Jess asked.

"We're working on that," Jax replied, trying to keep the anger out of his voice for Jess's sake. Every time he thought about the previous night's events, he felt his rage taking over him again.

"Why did this happen?" she asked quietly. Jax sighed, shaking his head.

"We're working on that, too," he said, "My best guess… someone trying to hurt the club. Or, more specifically, me." Jess gave him a small smile, squeezing his hand.

"Well, they missed," she said, in an attempt to lighten the mood. It didn't seem to work. Jax frowned as he nodded, looking sadly at her.

"Jess…" he said softly, "Jess, I'm so sorry." Jess shook her head.

"You didn't do anything, Jax," she said, "It's not your fault."

"Yeah, but I-" he began, but she cut him off.

"No, Jax," she said firmly, gripping his hand in hers as she looked directly into his eyes. The last thing she wanted was for him to feel guilty about this, "This was not your fault. Trust me, I'd let you know if it was." Jax smirked, giving her a small laugh.

"Okay," he said. They both glanced up as Rose walked in, carrying a large bouquet of flowers and beaming to see Jess awake.

"You're awake!" Rose said, setting the flowers down on the table by the bed as she leaned over Jess, kissing her softly on the forehead, "How are you feeling?" Jess nodded.

"I'm okay," she said. Rose looked over at Jax.

"Do you think you could maybe give us a minute?" she asked nervously. Jax hesitated but finally nodded, rising from his seat and kissing Jess lightly on the lips.

"I'll go let Luann and everyone know you're awake," he said, "They're all worried." Jess nodded, smiling at him as he walked out of the room and Rose took his seat.

"How you feeling, Jess?" Rose asked, looking worried. '_Like I was shot,_' Jess thought, but she didn't say it. She shrugged.

"I'm fine," she replied. She hated having everyone so worried about her and was not relishing the thought of more people visiting with similar expressions on their faces. Rose seemed to guess as much and tried her best to wipe the worry off of her face.

"That's good," she said, "You gave us quite a scare, I'll tell you." Jess grinned.

"What can I say? I like to keep things interesting," she said. Rose nodded but she didn't laugh and Jess could tell there was something more weighing on her mind.

"What is it?" Jess asked, "What don't you want to tell me?"

"What?" Rose asked, startled.

"I think I know you well enough by now to know when there's something you're not saying," Jess said, "Just tell me." Rose nodded, glancing up at the closed door to her room before looking back at her.

"I made the doctor promise that I would be the one to tell you about your surgery," she said. Jess nodded, beginning to get nervous. What could possibly have happened to make Rose so distressed?

"Okay," Jess said, waiting for her to elaborate.

"Well the first thing he told me was that one of the bullets went straight through your spleen. They had to remove part of it, but he said it was nothing much to worry about as they were able to save most of it," Rose began.

Jess nodded, rubbing her stomach. Okay, so she didn't have part of her spleen. She didn't even know what the hell it did, and if the doctor said it was nothing to worry about, she was not going to worry about it. But she knew Rose wasn't finished.

"The second bullet, though…" Rose said, increasing Jess's nerves as she paused and Jess wanted to scream at her to spit it out, "It got lodged in your uterus."

"Okay, so… what? They couldn't get it out or something?" Jess asked, wishing Rose would just tell her everything. Rose shook her head.

"No they got it all out," she said, "But… oh, I'm so sorry, Jess. It was damaged pretty bad. The doctor…. He said the scarring is so severe it'll make it very difficult for you to have kids. He said the likelihood of it was almost zero." Jess stared at her for a moment, letting the words sink in before she laid her head back on her pillow, staring at the ceiling while Rose watched her carefully.

She'd never given much thought to having kids. She'd never been in a relationship serious enough to start thinking like that, and truth be told none of her ex-boyfriends had ever really seemed like the fatherly type. She didn't even know if she would ever _want_ to have kids. But that decision wasn't supposed to be made for her. She was supposed to be able to decide for herself and to know the option was no longer there made her feel as if her chest was caving in on her.

"Jess?" Rose finally spoke up. Jess shook her head. She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to talk about it ever again. And then a thought occurred to her and she jerked her head up, staring at Rose with wide eyes.

"Who else knows?" she asked, her voice shaking. Jax was already feeling guilty enough about the whole thing, she didn't want to add this to it. Not to mention she wasn't sure how he would feel about the information. She knew how much he loved Abel. What if their relationship lasted and he wanted another child someday, and Jess would never be able to give him that? Would it be a deal breaker?

"Just me and the doctor," Rose assured her, "I told everyone about your spleen because they wouldn't stop pestering me, but I figured I'd let you decide what to do with the rest of the information."

Jess sighed in relief as she lay her head back down. She knew if she and Jax were going to be in a relationship, she'd need to tell him eventually. But right now, when it was all still so fresh… that was not the time.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**Thanks to everyone reading and reviewing! We loved all of the feedback we got on the last chapter!_ Please_ review and let us know what you thought of this chapter :) ****  
**


	22. Chapter 22

"Oh my God I'm so sick of this clubhouse!" Lux moaned, collapsing on a chair next to the couch where Jess was sitting, reading a magazine. Jess glanced up at Lux, nodding in agreement.

Jess had been discharged after a two week-long stay in the hospital and for the next several weeks the girls had been confined to the clubhouse. The excuse was that their window still hadn't been fixed, so they couldn't stay at the apartment, and as Jess couldn't go back to work for another couple of weeks she didn't have a lot of reason to leave.

But Jess knew the real reason they were being kept under lock and key. Jax was terrified of something happening to them again and he still hadn't gotten any leads on who was behind the attack. Jess knew until the attackers were found, he wasn't letting her or Lux out of the sight of a Son. She didn't blame him at all; on the contrary, she was also terrified of this unknown danger lurking out there somewhere. But two weeks cooped up in the clubhouse was almost enough to make her forget how scared she was.

"I know," Jess replied, closing her magazine and looking back at Lux, frowning slightly, "Has anything like this happened to you before?" Lux shook her head.

"No," she replied, "Not because of the club, anyway. There were a couple of years there where I managed to find danger perfectly well on my own, though." Jess nodded, feeling slightly relieved that this, at least, was an anomaly and not the rule.

"My mom, though," Lux said quietly, "She was attacked once. Some guys trying to get to the club through her." Jess frowned, looking back at Lux. For some reason, she couldn't picture Gemma ever letting anyone get the upper hand over her. She always seemed so tough and confident, so sure of herself.

"What happened to her?" Jess asked. Lux shook her head, sighing as she reached into her bag to get her cigarettes and lighting one, inhaling deeply.

"Some bad shit," she finally responded, "But she came out the other end all right, I guess. They weren't gonna try to kill her, but… some things might be worse." Jess nodded, deciding not to press Lux for details. It wasn't any of her business.

Jax walked into the clubhouse from the lot wearing his mechanic uniform – black pants slung low on his hips and a black Teller-Morrow T-shirt. Jess watched him walk, licking her lips subconsciously and biting her lip as he strode up to her.

"Don't do that," he said, his voice husky as he grinned, leaning over her with his hands resting on the back of the couch to kiss her.

"Don't do what?" Jess asked innocently. He kissed her again, this time a little longer.

"You know what," he said, "Otherwise I'm gonna have to throw you down on that bed in there, doctor's orders or not." Jess giggled, wrapping her arms around Jax's shoulder.

"Just a few more days," she said and he groaned.

"Anticipation," he said.

"Good God, get a room already," Lux spoke up from her spot on the couch. Jax turned his head slightly to look amusedly at his sister before turning back to Jess.

"I think we're bothering her," he said. Jess nodded.

"She seems bothered," she replied. He stood, jerking his head towards the hall and holding his hand out. Jess stood, taking his outstretched hand in hers, and he led her down the hall. He stopped at the ladder to the roof, motioning for her to climb up and she grinned. She stepped onto the ladder, climbing carefully until she'd reached the roof, Jax close behind her.

They sat on the opposite side of the roof this time, watching the sun beginning to set. Jess rested her head on Jax's shoulder and he wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close to him.

"You know, the first time I took you up here – that's when I knew I was in trouble," Jax said and Jess smiled, looking up at him. He glanced down at her, kissing her softly.

"Tell me more about this," Jess said, her grin widening. He shook his head, breathing deeply.

"You have no idea how much I care about you," he said softly, "Seeing you, lying on the floor like that in your apartment. It felt like my heart was getting ripped out of my chest."

"I care about you, too, Jax," Jess said, "I always have." Jax nodded, turning to look back at the sunset.

"I feel like… I need to explain things to you," he said, "About everything that happened over the last 5 months."

"Jax…"Jess tried to stop him, but he shook his head.

"I know we said we were just going to start over, but I don't think we can really do that without a clean slate," he said. Jess pursed her lips but finally nodded.

"Okay then," she said, "What do you need to explain?" He sighed, taking several moments to collect his thoughts.

"When I decided to get back together with Tara… it wasn't because I didn't have feelings for you. My biggest fear was that you wouldn't be able to handle my life and when we got in that fight, I thought there was no chance you'd want to be with someone like me," he said.

"You didn't give me a chance," Jess told him and he shrugged.

"No, I didn't," he admitted, "You were new and risky, and Tara was familiar and … comfortable, I guess. But the whole time… I knew all along it wasn't gonna last. She knew it, too. We were both just… pretending," he said.

"Jax, you really don't need to explain," Jess said, "It wasn't like I sat around waiting for you." He smirked, turning to look at her.

"Yeah, don't I know it," he said, "What was with that asshole, anyway?" Jess laughed.

"I thought he was normal!" she said, her smile fading as she continued, "But it never felt right with him."

"Why?" he asked. Jess looked up at him, giving him a look that said plainly that he knew why, "What?" he asked, grinning innocently. Jess rolled her eyes.

"Oh I don't know," she replied, "I guess obnoxious biker who can't take a hint is my type." He chuckled, curling an arm around her neck to pull her closer to him as he kissed her.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Opie pulled the truck into the Teller-Morrow lot and glanced over at Jess, who was sitting in the passenger seat. She smiled at him as he parked the truck and she hopped out.

"Thanks for taking me for my appointment," she said.

"No problem," Opie replied as they walked into the clubhouse. She'd had her stitches removed and the doctor said the wounds were healing perfectly, which was a relief. She'd wished Jax had been able to take her, but he'd been running down a potential lead on the attacks and had asked Opie to take her in his stead.

Jess walked back to the dorm she and Jax had been sharing, quickly disrobing and stepping into the shower. She glanced down at the wounds on her abdomen, now stitch free, and ran her fingertips over the dark, raised scars as she went over the conversation she had to have with Jax. Her doctor's appointment had given her a lot to think about. They'd cleared her to return to work as early as the next day, but Jess knew Jax wouldn't care what the doctors said. He would not like the thought of her going back to work, but Lux and Jess had been cooped up in the clubhouse for too long and it couldn't last forever.

She finally shut the water off, stepping out of the shower and grabbing a towel to wrap around her. She could hear Jax walk into the adjoining room, throwing his keys on the dresser and several moments later he opened the bathroom door. He smiled at her, taking a few steps inside to kiss her before leaning against the counter.

"You find anything out?" Jess asked, grabbing a second towel to pat her hair dry. Jax shook his head, sighing heavily.

"Not even a whisper," he said, "Info I had was bad." Jess frowned, knowing everyone was working nonstop to find the attackers and every time she asked him the same question she was always hoping for a different answer. She wanted nothing more than to put the whole incident behind them so that she and Jax could move on with their life together, but it seemed that day was not going to be today.

"You'll figure it out," Jess said encouragingly and Jax smiled at her, tilting his head as he watched her pat her hair dry, his eyes moving down to the towel wrapped precariously around her body.

"Yeah, we will," he agreed, but his mind was clearly now focused elsewhere. Jess grinned, setting the towel in her hand down as she turned to look at him.

"I wanted to talk to you about something," she said, deciding not to wait until she put clothes on. Perhaps naked under a towel would put Jax in a good enough mood that he wouldn't fight her on returning to work.

"What's that, darlin'?" he asked, his eyes finally returning to look into hers. Jess paused for a moment, trying to remember the speech she had prepared in the shower, but it had become lost.

"At my appointment today, the doctor cleared me to go back to work," Jess began, wincing as Jax's grin turned into a scowl.

"What? No," he said firmly, turning around to walk back into the bedroom as if that was the end of that conversation. Jess sighed, following him.

"Jax, I can't stay cooped up in this clubhouse forever," Jess said, trying to appeal to his common sense. He shook his head.

"No, not forever," he agreed, "Just until we find who did this."

"Who knows when that will be!" Jess exclaimed in frustration, "Lux and I are going to go crazy. We need to go to work. Luann is counting on me."

"Luann got along just fine before you started working there," Jax said, his voice growing irritated, "She'll do just fine until you can go back."

"I'm going back to work, Jax," Jess stated, thinking that maybe if she put her foot down, he'd listen. She was wrong.

"No, you're not!" he yelled, banging his fist on the dresser angrily. Jess pursed her lips, trying to decide the best way to proceed as they squared off across from one another. She eventually changed track, deciding that a logical approach was not the way to go. She smiled flirtatiously at him, slithering up and allowing the towel to fall as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

She could see the anger still flashing in his eyes, but it was decreasing exponentially the longer she stood pressing her body against his. She turned her eyes up to his, biting her lip and he smirked at her, shaking his head as he finally wrapped his arms around her, his hands trailing down her naked back.

"This isn't going to work, either," he told her and she looked up at him with sad eyes, but he shook his head again, "I became immune to those by the time Lux turned 10."

She frowned, breathing deeply as she stared up at him and she tried to figure out how she was going to win this argument. She and Jax hadn't been together long enough for her to discover his weak spot, and as she stood there studying him, her arms still wrapped firmly around his shoulders, she wondered if he even had one.

She finally stood on her tips toes, kissing him gently on the neck as her lips trailed to his jawline and up to his ear. She felt him tense as she ran her hands through his hair, gently taking his ear lobe between her teeth.

"Going back to work isn't the only thing I got cleared for today," she whispered and he groaned, his hands roaming down to her ass as he lifted her up, carrying her the few steps over to the bed before laying her down. She grinned up at him as he pulled his clothes off before settling back on top of her, kissing her fiercely.

"But then this means I get to go back to work," she said as he lips trailed down her body.

"Fuck it," he said distractedly, "But you'll have a patch there with you."

"I can live with that," Jess said happily, laying her head back as she enjoyed Jax's ministrations.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

It turned out that when Jax said he'd have a patch on Jess while she was working, he actually meant he'd have half the club hovering around Jess and Lux at all times to the point that Lux finally blew up at Phil and Rat.

"You are getting in the way of my tips!" Lux shrieked at them after their hovering had caused one of her tables to finally leave, "Which means you're getting in the way of the new Ferragamo peep toes I've been saving up for which means I'm PISSED!" Phil and Rat exchanged glances with each other but neither of them responded or moved.

"Ugh!" Lux said in frustration moving around them and marching past Juice, who was carefully guarding the door to the office Jess and Luann now shared.

"How are you living with this!?" Lux asked, throwing herself in the chair opposite Jess. Jess glanced up at her, shrugging.

"He's not bothering me," she said.

"Easy for you to say," Lux grumbled, "You're back here being all managerial and not having your tables scared away by stupid bikers." Jess shrugged, leaning back in her chair.

"Look, it makes Jax feel better to have them around and to be honest it makes me feel better, too," she said. Lux rolled her eyes.

"Well I'm gonna have a word with my dear brother," she grumbled, "He needs to tell them to stay at least 10 yards away. I almost dropped an entire tray of drinks earlier because Rat was standing right behind me. It's obnoxious." Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"Good luck with that," she responded.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess sat on the counter in the bathroom, doing her makeup to get ready for work that day, in higher spirits than she had been since the drive by. The past week had gone by fairly smoothly and Jax had agreed to keep the hovering to a minimum for Lux, who was much happier being carefully watched from afar. Nothing bad had yet happened, anyway, and Jess found herself finding a sense of security once again.

She glanced up as Jax strode into the bathroom, smiling and kissing her quickly. She smiled back at him, setting the bottle of mascara she had in her hand next to where she sat on the counter as she looked at him.

"We're meeting with the Niners at Cara Cara again today," Jax told her and Jess nodded.

"What time should we have the room ready for you?" she asked. Jax shrugged, checking his watch.

"About 5," he said, "I'll have Tig and Opie at the club with you and Lux until we get there." Jess nodded.

"Okay. Rat and V Lin still keeping guard outside the front doors?" she asked. Jax nodded, "Okay, then I guess I'll see you at 5."

"Can't wait," Jax said softly, kissing her deeply before finally pulling himself away reluctantly, "Alright I gotta go. I'll see you soon." Jess nodded, watching him leave before returning to finish her makeup.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Opie stuck his head inside Jess's office while she was busily filing paper work and she glanced up, smiling at him.

"They here?" she asked. Opie nodded and Jess stood, following Opie up the stairs to the VIP room that she'd had set up for the meeting. Lux and Tig met them up there and the rest of the Sons and Niners followed shortly behind. The only one missing was the prospect, V Lin, who was standing guard outside the front doors of the club. Jax walked up to Jess, wrapping his arms around her and giving her a kiss in greeting as she smiled up at him.

"I must really like you to go back to waiting tables for you," she said jokingly.

"Ah, well I appreciate it," he said grinning, kissing her again before walking away to take his seat and Lux and Jess went around the table getting drink orders.

"So you and the prez now, huh?" LeRoy asked Jess, grinning up at her as she went to take his order. Jess blushed, smiling.

"Guess so," she said. He shook his head, grinning, and she wrote down his order before moving down the line.

After everyone had been served, Jess and Lux walked outside of the meeting room, followed closely by Rat, and the three of them waited outside. It was nearly an hour before the doors opened again and the Sons and Niners filed out of the VIP room.

"Anyway you can take a break and come have a drink with us?" Jax asked as he slung an arm around Jess's shoulder. She grinned up at him.

"Well, I'll have to ask my boss," she said, "Oh wait, that's me. Yes I think I can do that."

Jax laughed as they all filed downstairs and the Sons took their usual table by the stage, the Niners sitting at the next table over. Jax pulled Jess onto his lap and she smiled, looking around at everyone sitting around the table. You'd never know looking at everyone smiling, joking around and having a good time how somber the mood around the clubhouse had been of late and Jess was happy things seemed to be getting somewhat back to normal.

"Jess!" Jess glanced up at the sound of her name to see one of her newest waitresses, Tina, scurrying up to her looking worried. Jess crawled off Jax's lap, frowning at Tina's expression.

"What's wrong?" she asked quickly. Tina shook her head.

"I don't know. Table 46 wants to talk to a manager but I swear I didn't do anything," she said, her eyes wide. Jess shook her head.

"Don't worry about it, I'll go talk to them," she said, trying to reassure Tina, who looked close to tears. Tina nodded as Jax started to stand. Jess looked at him, shaking her head.

"You can't go with me, Jax," she said, "You're going to scare them and they're obviously already upset."

"I don't care," Jax said firmly.

"I'll go with her!" Lux spoke up, hopping off of Tig's lap and walking over to Jess. Jax rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, that makes me feel better," Jax said sarcastically. Lux looked around the table, pointing at Rat.

"Rat can come, too," she said, "He looks the least threatening."

"Gee, thanks," Rat muttered, standing up. Jess looked back appealingly at Jax, who finally shrugged and nodded, taking his seat once again. Jess walked over to the table, which was the farthest in the back behind the stairs, to see it crowded with at least ten men crammed around. Jess looked around at them, smiling.

"Hi, I'm Jess," she said, "Is there a problem?"

"Yes, I'd say there's a problem," a voice spoke up and Jess looked around for the source of the voice before finally spotting Ethan, the man she'd waited on several times before.

"Oh, hi Ethan," she said smiling, but he did not return the smile.

"What were you talking to the niggers about?" another man at the table spoke up and Jess scowled at the use of the slur.

"I don't like that word in here," she said, "And it's none of your business what I was talking to them about." Ethan stood, walking around the table toward Jess and Rat stepped in between them.

"You need to back away," he said and Ethan narrowed his eyes at him, trying to push past him but Rat shoved him away from Jess. One of Ethan's friends stood, punching Rat in the face as Ethan grabbed Jess by the arm, holding her in front of him.

"I've been waiting for this day for a long time," he said quietly in her ear and she looked back at him strangely, trying to wriggle out of his grasp.

"Jax!" Lux called, looking desperately across the club. Jax looked up at the sound of his name and rushed towards them, the other Sons and Niners following closely. Jax came to a halt as soon as he saw who was using Jess as a human shield, his face full of shock. He quickly regained his composure, lunging for Ethan and trying to get Jess away from him.

"Mother fucker!" he screamed as all of Ethan's men stood to separate them, "Fucking Zobelle!" Jax screamed as two of Ethan's men held him back. Lux looked at Ethan with wide eyes, suddenly lunging for him as well.

"ZOBELLE?" she shrieked as Tig held her back, her arms and legs flinging wildly in an attempt to free herself, "You had my mom raped you son of bitch! And I comped your drinks!"

Jess looked frantically between the man holding her and the looks of rage on Jax and Lux's face, which had spread to every other Son surrounding them. The Sons stood squared off against Zobelle and his men and Jess did not see a way out of this for herself. Zobelle's grip on her was far too strong and she had no idea what his plan for her was. According to what he had whispered in her ear, this was a day he'd been planning for a long time.

"What the fuck do you want?" Jax finally spat at Zobelle, not taking his eyes off of him.

"That's easy enough," Zobelle responded airily, "I want you to stop selling guns to the Niners, effective immediately. Take what happened to your old lady and your sister as a warning. You know what I'm capable of."

Jax's nostrils flared as his lip curled in anger and disgust. He glanced desperately at Jess, obviously trying to find some way to get her away from Zobelle, but Zobelle just shook his head.

"Relax, Jax," he said, "I'll give you the day to follow our instructions. I just need to use Jess here to make sure none of you do anything stupid. As soon as I'm safely to my car, I'll let her go. But make a move and I won't be so kind."

Jax stared at him, making a sudden move as Zobelle began walking away, keeping Jess in front of him. Jess shook her head at Jax, begging him to just let Zobelle walk out so he would let her go. Zobelle waved his finger at Jax.

"No, Jax," he said, "Don't give me a reason to hurt her. Again." Jax glared at him as he walked away and they all filed out carefully behind them, Jax not taking his eyes off Zobelle. They stood, crowded around the entrance to Cara Cara as Zobelle walked to his car that had pulled up in the round about before shoving Jess away from him as he hopped in the car. Jess flung her arms around Jax, burying her face in his shoulder as he wrapped his arms tightly around her.

"You're okay," he whispered soothingly. LeRoy walked up to Jax solemnly, nodding.

"Whatever you need, Jax," he said. Jax nodded.

"Thanks," he said. LeRoy shook his head.

"Hey, I'm not doing it for you. I like them," he said, nodding first to Jess and then Lux, who was standing close by. Jess gave him a tearful smile, her cheek still pressed tightly against Jax's chest.

"Alright, everyone. Clubhouse. Now!" Jax shouted. The Sons all nodded as Jax shook LeRoy's hand before walking Jess to his bike.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess clutched Jax's hand as he walked her into the clubhouse, grabbing a beer for each of them as he waited for everyone to congregate inside. Jess sat on a stool, looking worriedly at Jax as she clutched the beer in her hands.

"Who's Zobelle, Jax?" she asked. He shook his head, standing close to her as he rubbed the back of his fingers tenderly down her cheek.

"Don't worry," he said softly.

"He shot me!" Jess exclaimed, "Twice! Please, just tell me who he is." Jax sighed.

"He runs a white supremacist organization called L.O.A.N," he said, "We dealt with him a couple years back. He likes to get to us by getting personal." Jess frowned, remembering what Lux had told her about her mother once getting attacked.

"Gemma?" she whispered. Jax pursed his lips, nodding.

"Yeah, but don't worry," he said, "He will not touch you again." Jess nodded, looking around the room for something else to say.

"Did my windows ever get fixed?" she asked. Jax nodded.

"Yeah, but you're gonna need to stay at the clubhouse until all this cools down," he said, preparing himself for an argument, but Jess just nodded agreeably.

"Yeah, okay," she said.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**We really hope you liked this chapter! The story now is going to start taking on a different tone as they all deal with Zobelle, etc, but I really hope you like where we take it! Your feedback, as always, is helpful so please let us know what you think! Thanks! **


	23. Chapter 23

Jess ran a hand distractedly through her hair as she tried to complete the alcohol order for Cara Cara that was sitting in front of her, but she couldn't seem to focus. She kept glancing up every few minutes to make sure Opie's hulking figure was still standing outside the door to her office, which was helping to keep her calm. Ever since Zobelle's reveal at Cara Cara the week before, Jess had been filled with apprehension every time she left the clubhouse. She'd thought that being able to put a face to her attacker would make things better, but it had only made things worse. Now there was a defined figure waiting in her nightmares.

She hadn't said any of this to Jax, of course. Around him, she made sure to keep a brave face on as she didn't want him to worry any more than he already was. It had been hard enough to get him to let her and Lux come back to Cara Cara, and as scary as the thought of going back was, Jess refused to let Zobelle rule her life.

She was starting to feel like she was keeping a lot from Jax. She also still hadn't told him about the bomb Rose dropped on her at the hospital and the secret was starting to weigh on her. She had no idea how he'd react. They hadn't been together long enough to even think about having kids, and she wasn't sure if the fact that she now probably couldn't would be a deal breaker. She was terrified of losing him after all they'd gone through to finally be together, but she was still trying to wrap her head around her own feelings about the news.

Jess finally gave up on the order, sighing and leaning back in her chair as she heard the music from outside begin to fade and the lights come on. Closing time. Maybe the quiet would help her focus. Luann rushed into the office and smiled at Jess as she grabbed her purse from the closet.

"I'm heading over to the clubhouse for a little bit," she said, "Will you be alright closing down here?" Jess nodded, returning Luann's smile.

"Yeah, I just gotta finish up a couple things and I'll be right behind you," Jess said.

"Good," Luann replied, "Call me if you have any problems."

"I will," Jess said, grinning, "Now get outta here. You spend too much time here as it is." Luann laughed, rolling her eyes.

"Don't I know it," she said, strolling out of the office door. Lux brushed past her and into the office, slapping her receipts from the end of the night down on Jess's desk. Jess collected them, reaching down to grab an envelope to stuff the receipts into.

"I swear," Lux sighed as she threw herself in her chair, "Tig is not allowed to be my bodyguard anymore." Jess laughed.

"Why's that?" she asked.

"Because every time I flirt with a customer he glares at them and my tips go down," she said, "At this rate, I'm never getting my new Ferragamos. He will be punished." Jess grinned, shaking her head as Opie stuck his head in the office.

"Friday night party's on," he said.

"Why does that not surprise me?" Lux asked sarcastically.

"I guess we'll be there since we pretty much live there now," Jess replied, "I just gotta finish up a few things and then we can go." Opie nodded, about to step back into the hall when Jess called him back.

"Hey, Opie, will you close the door?" she asked. Opie frowned but pulled the door closed and Jess turned to look at Lux, needing to talk to someone else about her situation. The fact that her best friend was also her boyfriend's sister made things a little complicated, however.

"What's up?" Lux asked, eyeing her curiously. Jess took a deep breath, slowly exhaling as she looked back at Lux.

"If I tell you something… will you promise me you won't tell anyone?" she asked, "Especially not Jax." Lux raised her eyebrows, slowly nodding her head.

"Yeah, of course," she said. Jess leaned back in her chair and she absent-mindedly rubbed her hand over the scar on her belly.

"At the hospital, you know, after the attack," Jess began, unsure of where to begin. Lux nodded her on encouragingly, "My spleen wasn't the only thing damaged."

"Okay…" Lux said slowly, her eyebrows creasing in worry, "Are you okay? I mean… you're not dying or anything right?" Jess scoffed, rolling her eyes.

"Lux, what if I was dying? Do you think that would've made me feel better?" Jess asked.

"Oh, shit, yeah. Sorry. But you're not, right?" she asked.

"No, I'm not dying," Jess replied, "But I… the second bullet got lodged in my… well, anyway, it looks like I can't have kids anymore." Lux frowned, scratching the back of her neck as she looked back at Jess.

"Oh, shit," she said quietly, "I mean, did you want to have kids?" Jess shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe. I wanted the option," she replied.

"I'm sorry, Jess," Lux said sincerely, "And I take it from my sworn silence that Jax doesn't know." Jess shook her head.

"No one knows. Except my Aunt. And you, now," Jess said, "And I don't know what to do. I'm afraid to tell Jax. I mean, it's still so early for us…" Her voice trailed off and she looked at Lux, hopeful that she would have the magical solution. But she just shrugged.

"It's your business, Jess," she said, "At this point… it's not really his. I mean, you've only really been together a couple of weeks."

"So you don't think I should tell him?" Jess asked.

"Well, it is kind of a big deal," Lux said, "You'll have to tell him eventually. But… you know, when you're ready to tell him. With everything else going on, I don't think you should be worried about this, too." Jess nodded, sighing as Lux gave her a small smile and stood from her chair.

"I'll wait for you outside to finish up," she said and Jess nodded as Lux walked out the door. There it was. She'd tell him when she was ready. Whenever that was.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Walking up to the clubhouse, if Jess hadn't known better she would have thought this was just a normal Friday night, like all the others. The party was in full swing. As usual, a crowd of croweaters, Sons, and hang-arounds crowded around the boxing ring in the lot, watching a match between a couple of hang- arounds Jess didn't recognize. She found the normalcy of it all comforting. It almost fooled her into believing nothing had really changed.

She and Lux walked past the crowd and into the clubhouse, which was in its usual Friday night state of drunken debauchery. The music was set to 11 and a couple of croweaters were fighting over the use of the stripper pole while Juice and Phil looked on, grinning. Lux spotted Tig and ran off to see him while Jess scanned the room for Jax, finally spotting him sitting at a table with Chibs and Happy. He smiled as she walked over to him, sitting back from the table so she could sit in his lap.

"Hi," Jess said, grinning as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

"Hi," he murmured, kissing her, "Everything go alright at Cara Cara?"

"I'm sure your hourly reports filled you in on all the nothing that went on tonight," she said and he smirked.

"Hey, those hourly reports keep me sane," he said, "I wish I could be there all the time."

Jess shook her head, already feeling guilty enough that her and Lux's insistence that they go to work was putting pressure on the Sons. There weren't that many of them, and the half that wasn't constantly patrolling the clubhouse while they were there were trying to find where Zobelle was hiding out. Unfortunately, Juice had come up with so many properties that had ties to Zobelle that it was taking a long time to search them all out, and there was a good possibility that Zobelle kept moving. He was a very intelligent enemy, which was not good for any of them.

"We're fine there," she said, "You just keep doing what you're doing." Jax nodded, running his hands absent-mindedly along the small of her back as Jess spotted Luann sitting at the bar, talking to Gemma. Gemma walked off towards the bathroom and Jess crawled off Jax's lap.

"I'm gonna go say hi to Luann," she said, and he nodded as Jess leaned down to kiss him before walking up to Luann.

"Well you finally made it!" Luann exclaimed, giving Jess a hug. Jess grinned, nodding. It was nice to see Luann away from Cara Cara every once in a while, and she seemed to be in better mood than she had been lately.

"Yup, just had to finish up those orders before I left," Jess said.

"Now don't work too hard," Luann told her and Jess rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, look who's talking," Jess said. Luann grinned, shrugging her shoulders as Jess continued, "You know, I thought my helping you out would let you go home every now and then."

"Hey, I'm at the club all the time because I don't want to be home," Luann said, "So don't take my never leaving as an example of what you should be doing. You're doing great." Jess smiled.

"Thanks, Luann," she said, "I don't know what I'd be doing if I'd never moved here. Waiting tables for the rest of my life, probably." Luann shook her head.

"Well I'm glad you came," she said, "I'm going up to see Otto in a couple of days. He's so proud of you." Jess felt herself blush as she smiled, giving Luann a hug.

"Well tell him I say hi," she said, wishing she could go with Luann but knew that she and Otto needed some time alone together. Luann's cell phone rang just then and she answered it, listening to the call as her smile faded quickly. She shut the phone, glancing up at Jess.

"I gotta go back up to the club," she said, "That was one of the new security guys. Said it looked like there'd been a break in." Jess frowned, glancing around the clubhouse.

"You should take somebody with you," she said. Luann shook her head.

"I'll be alright," she said, "The security guys are waiting for me." Lux bounded up to them just then, clearly drunk with a huge smile on her face.

"Hey, Luann," she said, "I wanted to tell you I'm not coming in tomorrow. I need to spend some with Tig _away_ from Cara Cara." Luann frowned at Lux, shaking her head, and Jess could tell she was getting angry.

"No, Lux, this is not okay!" Luann said sternly, "If you're on the schedule, you need to be there, and if you're not going to be there you better have a better reason than wanting to see Tig."

"But Luann-" Lux started to argue, but Luann cut her off.

"No, Lux! I'm not doing this shit anymore! If you're not at work tomorrow you're fired," Luann said firmly.

"You can't fire me!" Lux shrieked, and Luann crossed her arms, looking stonily at Lux.

"Watch me," she said, "You can't just not show up to work anytime you don't feel like going anymore. It's not happening." Lux stared at her for a minute, her face filled with disbelief before she finally scowled, turning away and running off. Luann sighed, shaking her head as she turned back to Jess.

"Sometimes that girl really frustrates me," Luann said, "I need to get Gemma to talk to her. She's the only one that can get through to her half the time." Jess nodded, looking worriedly at the spot Lux had disappeared into the crowd at.

"I'm gonna see if I can find her," Jess said, "Get her to calm down. Let me know what's happened at Cara Cara." Luann nodded as she grabbed her purse from off the bar and walked out of the clubhouse while Jess went searching for Lux. She didn't see any sign of her but spotted Tig on the other side of the bar and walked up to him.

"Hey, do you know where Lux is?" she asked. He shrugged, shaking his head.

"Nah, she's probably in the bathroom or something," he said.

Jess nodded, turning to walk down the hall toward the bathroom when Jax came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her neck. She grinned, forgetting all about her hunt for Lux as she turned around, wrapping her arms around Jax's shoulders as he leaned down to kiss her. He grabbed her hand and she followed him out through the side door by the kitchen where they sat on the picnic table.

He pulled a joint out of his pocket grinning at her as he held it up. She laughed, tilting her head to one side as she smiled at him.

"Are you sharing again?" she asked and he nodded, smirking as he lit it before passing it to her.

A retching sound came from behind them and Jess turned to see that a hang-around had wandered to the side of the clubhouse from the lot out front and was now bent over a couple hundred yards from where Jax and Jess sat, his hands bracing himself on the wall as he vomited profusely. She wrinkled her nose in disgust, shaking her head as she turned to Jax, who smirked.

"Can't hold his liquor," he said, taking a hit off the joint.

"He gonna be your next prospect?" Jess teased. Jax chuckled, shaking his head.

"Fuck no," he said and Jess laughed.

"You're all just a bunch of teases, you know," she said, "Why let 'em hang around when you know they've got no chance?"

"Babe, 90 percent of these guys have no chance," he said, "If we didn't let 'em hang around, the clubhouse would be empty and then we wouldn't get any good prospects." Jess laughed, wincing slightly as the hang around hurled again.

"Tease," she repeated. He laughed, shrugging.

"Yeah, well it's just like 100 percent of those croweaters are never gonna be old ladies. Doesn't stop 'em from trying," he said.

"Yeah… I feel less bad for them," Jess said.

"Yeah, their best bet is to just get knocked up by a Son. Then they'd have a tie to the club at least," Jax said jokingly. Jess raised her eyebrows at him.

"Oh like my mom?" she asked. Jax rolled his eyes, throwing his arm around her as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"I didn't mean _you_," he said.

"Uh huh," Jess said, grinning up at him, "Just like you didn't mean it when you said I wasn't important?"

"When did I ever say that?" Jax asked.

"After Lux and I went to Lodi," she reminded him.

"Oh yeah. No, that I meant," Jax said grinning and Jess rolled her eyes, pulling herself out of his grasp as she slapped him playfully on the shoulder with the back of her hand, "Well you're important _now_," he corrected and Jess laughed. She watched as a stray cat climbed the fence in front of them, walking along the top of it until he disappeared into the shadows.

"I want a cat," Jess mused, the weed affecting her ability to think in a straight line. Jax shook his head.

"No way," he said. Jess grinned, shaking her head.

"You can't tell me what to do. We don't live together," she said. He cocked an eyebrow at her, "Well, not permanently."

"Yeah, well you might live with me someday and no way do I want a fucking cat," Jax said.

"Or you might live with me," Jess said grinning. He smirked.

"Yeah, move me and Abel in with you and Lux? That'd be a lot of fun," he said sarcastically, "Not to mention Tig over all the damn time."

"Hey, if I have to deal with it you have to deal with it," Jess said. Jax shook his head.

"The difference is she's my sister," he said, "There are certain things I don't want to see. Or hear." Jess laughed, shrugging.

"Okay, okay," she said, leaning her head against him and yawning widely.

"Tired?" Jax asked. Jess nodded.

"It's been a long day," she said. Jax rose from the table, holding his hand out to her and she took it as she also stood. Jax wrapped his arms around her, kissing her deeply before looking down at her.

"Then let's go make it just a little longer," he whispered and she grinned as he led her inside and back to the dorms.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess woke early the next day, glancing over to see Jax still sleeping soundly. She tried to fall back asleep, but every time she closed her eyes, Zobelle's face appeared, taunting her, and she knew sleep would be impossible. She sighed, crawling quietly out of bed and trying not to wake Jax. She walked to her bag and dug through it, searching for a tank top, shorts, and her running shoes. She needed to go for a run, clear her head, and hopefully get Zobelle out of it.

Jax groaned tiredly as Jess pulled on her shorts and she turned to look at him, smiling. His arms were stretched above his head, which was still lying firmly on the pillow, and his eyes were closed, but she knew he was awake.

"Do you ever sleep in?" he grumbled at her, his voice gruff from the early morning.

"I wanted to go for a run," Jess said. Jax groaned, reaching his hand out for her.

"Come back to bed," he said, still mumbling, "I'll give you a work out." Jess grinned as her eyes grazed over his naked back, the comforter draped low over his hips, extremely tempted by the suggestion. She took a few steps toward the bed, grasping his hand in hers as he pulled her down onto the bed, grinning and now fully awake and Jess thought she might just end up staying in bed with Jax all day.

But that was not to be. Jess sighed as there was a frantic pounding on the door, rolling over and groaning.

"What now?" Jess asked and Jax glanced over at her, shrugging, "Maybe if we're quiet they'll go away," Jess whispered, wrapping her arms around Jax's shoulders. He grinned until he heard Opie yelling for him through the door, sounding panicked.

"Jax!" Opie called, banging on the door again. Jax groaned, releasing Jess from his grip as he pulled himself out of bed, pulling a pair of jeans on and Jax opened the door to see Opie standing there, looking as if something horrible had just happened. Jess sat up straighter, watching them with wide eyes.

"There's a fire, Jax," he said, "It's Cara Cara. It's on fire." Jax turned back to look at Jess, who had already sprinted out of bed and thrown on a t-shirt before she dashed past them both.

"Fuck," Jax hissed, grabbed his shirt and cut that had been tossed on a chair and throwing them on, hurriedly following after Jess.

Once they had climbed on Jax's bike, Jess clutching Jax tightly around the waist, all that was going through her mind was panic and confusion. Was this Zobelle again? Or just an innocent fire? Was anyone hurt?

As they neared Cara Cara, Jess could see smoke billowing up to the clouds from a distance and silently begged Jax to go faster. As if reading her thoughts, he sped up and as they turned the corner Jess's eyes welled with tears as she saw the burnt remains of the club Luann and Otto had built together. The club that had given Jess her family. Flames were still dancing merrily as a group of firefighters attempted to put it out.

Jess threw herself off the back of Jax's bike, noticing Luann's car parked in the lot and stumbled in her haste to get off. She looked around for her, desperate to find out what had happened, what was going on. A huge crowd had clustered around the building as well as several fire trucks and an ambulance.

"Luann!" Jess yelled, struggling to spot her in the crowd of people. She rushed towards the crowd and tried to fight her way through. As she reached the front, where yellow tape had been erected to keep the crowd back, she looked wildly around at the scene. It was chaotic. The firefighters were just managing to get the fire under control and several police officers were interviewing people all over. She dashed under the yellow tape, running past the front of the crowd as she scanned all of the faces for Luann. She had to be here somewhere.

She looked towards the ambulance, where a crowd of police officers were gathered and ran towards them until she noticed they were congregated around a stretcher holding a black body bag. She froze, remembering Luann leaving the clubhouse during the party to come to Cara Cara. Something about a break in. But that couldn't be her. It _couldn't _be.

"LUANN!" Jess screamed desperately, sprinting towards the ambulance, Jax hot on her heels. Jess could feel tears stinging her eyes but brushed them away. She refused to believe it was Luann in that bag. The universe could not be cruel enough to give her a mother, only to take her away less than a year later.

"Who is that?" she begged one of the police officers and he looked over at her. She looked down to see the shiny sheriff badge on his chest, his name tag reading 'Roosevelt'.

"There are no civilians allowed over here just yet," he said, but his voice was kind.

"Please, just tell me," Jess choked, "Just tell me who it is." Roosevelt glanced behind Jess to look at Jax before returning his gaze to Jess.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"I'm Jessica Tyler," Jess said desperately, "I'm the Assistant Manager here. I'm the owner's step-daughter. Please… just please," she begged, her face crumpling as she looked desperately at Roosevelt. He looked sadly back at her and she shook her head at the confirmation of the news she dreaded to hear.

"No…" Jess whispered. The entire world was closing in on her and she began gasping for breath, struggling to get any air into her lungs, "No," she repeated.

"It's Luann Delaney," Roosevelt said as gently as he could and Jess felt herself crumple. Jax grabbed her before she hit the ground and she turned into his arms, screaming into his shoulder.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**So first off, sorry I'm posting so late today! It's been a crazy week and I've been out of town all weekend and only just got back. **

**Second, I hope you enjoyed this new chapter, and aren't TOO mad at us about the end! Those of you who have read the story before might have been expecting it, but to our new readers... sorry? :) **

**I'll try to have the next chapter up on Wednesday this week if we get some good feedback! Otherwise it'll be Sunday as usual! Thanks for reading and pleeeaassseee review! :) **


	24. Chapter 24

Jess had become dead weight in Jax's arms, unable to hold herself up. All of her energy was going into the struggle to deny what she'd just been told. Luann was not dead. The cops were wrong. This was some huge mistake. Her heart felt like it had been permanently ripped from her body and it was a pain she hadn't felt before. She couldn't focus. Coming back to reality would mean facing the truth and she couldn't do that. Not yet.

Because the truth was that this was her fault and she couldn't bear to think about it. She should have insisted Luann take someone with her to the club the night before. Why hadn't she done that? Why hadn't she made sure Luann was safe? She couldn't move. She could barely breathe.

She was vaguely aware of Jax scooping her up into his arms and walking her over to the ambulance. He sat her down gently inside, her legs dangling over the edge. He crouched in front of her, brushing his fingers down her face as she stared at a point in space, focusing on nothing. She wasn't trying to avoid looking at Jax, but her mind was in so much shock she felt as if she'd lost all control. She was completely frozen.

"Jess, I'm so sorry," Jax whispered, but Jess didn't respond. Her eyes were wide and unblinking, her lips parted slightly. Other than the slight rise and fall of her chest from breathing, she wasn't moving.

"Jess?" Jax said worriedly, shaking her shoulders slightly, but Jess just moved with his hand like a ragdoll, unresponsive.

"Jax!" Jax turned at the sound of his name to see Opie running up to him. He glanced at Jess worriedly before turning to Jax.

"Jax, we gotta go back to the clubhouse," he said, "Cops everywhere." Jax turned desperately back to Jess, whose eyes were still blank, and he shook his head.

"She's in shock," Jax said, running a hand through his hair in worried frustration, "She can't ride."

"I'll take her in the squad car," Roosevelt offered, stepping over to them. Jax looked at Roosevelt hesitatingly before turning to look at Jess, realizing he had no other options.

"Yeah, okay," he said, "Thanks." Roosevelt nodded as Jax lifted Jess from the ambulance, cradling her in his arms as he and Roosevelt ran towards the squad car. Jax loaded her in, frowning in concern as he took one last look at her before running to his bike. He and Opie pulled out in front of Roosevelt as they took off towards the clubhouse.

Jax could see the flashing lights lining the street, parked not in the TM lot but across the street, in front of Jess and Lux's apartment. Jax frowned as he saw a crew of cops searching Lux's car as the front door opened and Lux was walked outside by a cop, her hands handcuffed behind her back. She looked like a complete mess.

Roosevelt pulled up behind him and Jax rushed over to the car to see that Jess had come out of her shock, but only just. She stepped out of the car, slightly clumsy on her feet as she looked around at the scene. She frowned as she saw Lux being walked down the stairs in handcuffs and looked towards Lux's car, where a cop was taking a baseball bat out of the trunk. It was covered in blood.

She looked back at Lux, connecting the dots in her head as rage overcame her and she ran towards Lux. Jax ran to Jess, gripping her around the waist as she lunged toward Lux.

"WHAT DID YOU DO!" Jess screamed, trying to wriggle out of Jax's grasp as the cop walked Lux toward a squad car. Lux looked at her, her face full of fear and disbelief.

"Nothing!" Lux shouted, her lip quivering.

"Why is there a goddamn bloody baseball bat in your car!?" Jess shrieked, and it was taking all of Jax's strength to keep her in his arms. Tears poured down Lux's face as she shook her head furiously.

"I didn't do anything!" she said, "You know me! You know I wouldn't do something like that!"

"Jess, Lux didn't do anything," Jax said to Jess, but it was useless. He turned back to Lux as they lowered her into the car, "Lux, don't worry, okay? I'll get Rosen on it. We'll get this figured out."

It wasn't until the cops had shut the door behind Lux and driven away that Jess finally stopped struggling against Jax. She went limp in his arms, turning around and throwing her arms around him as she sobbed into his shoulder. Jax rubbed her back, turning to look at Opie.

"Call Rosen," he said, "Let him know Lux has been arrested. I need you to run point on this right now. I gotta take of Jess." Opie nodded.

"Do what you gotta do," he said, "I'll call you with any news." Jax nodded as he picked Jess up once again, carrying her upstairs and into her room. He set her gently on the bed, leaning over her as she curled up, staring up at him, her eyes wet and her arm outstretched toward him.

"Stay with me?" she asked meekly and he nodded, crawling into bed next to her and allowing her to curl into him as he wrapped his arms tightly around her.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Tig paced the open room of the clubhouse, trying with all his might not to rip every hair out of his head in frustration. He'd wanted to go up to the police station as soon as he'd heard about Lux, but Opie had told him to stay behind, that Rosen was taking care of Lux and that they needed everyone together at the clubhouse. Gemma walked up to Tig and he stopped pacing, running his hands through his hair.

"Any word?" Tig asked desperately. He hated being in such a helpless position, especially when it concerned Lux. She must be so scared right now. He hated that she was alone. He sighed as Gemma shook her head.

"She was with you all morning," Gemma stated, "Wasn't she?" Tig looked bleakly at Gemma, slowly shaking his head.

"No. She disappeared last night. Finally called me this morning saying she was at the apartment. Said she'd been doing shit with Jess," he said, "But that was maybe an hour before the cops showed up."

"And clearly not true," Gemma said, "Based on Jess's reaction." Tig nodded in agreement, taking a deep breath.

"I know," he said, "I don't know where the fuck she was last night but I know one thing. She was _not_ at fucking Cara Cara." Gemma nodded, pursing her lips.

"It'll get sorted out, Tig," she said confidently, "Lux didn't do anything wrong." Tig nodded, knowing there was no other option but for Gemma to be right. There was no way he was letting Lux go down for this.

SOASOASOASOASOA

Jess had finally run out of tears, lying next to Jax and gripping him tightly, whimpering. She finally sat up, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand and looked at Jax.

"How could this have happened?" she asked in a whisper, shaking her head, "I was just talking to her last night. And now she's…." Jess couldn't bring herself to say the word. Jax sat up, running his hand lightly down her back.

"I'm so sorry, Jess," he said helplessly, "I know how much she meant to you." Jess nodded, looking down at the charm bracelet she still wore every day. She fingered each charm individually, stopping when she got to the Cara Cara charm Luann had had specially made.

"What's Otto gonna do?" she asked, gazing up at Jax, "Luann was everything to him."

"He has you now, too," Jax reminded her, tilting her chin up lightly so she looked up at him, "Otto will be okay." Jess nodded, sniffling slightly as Jax checked his watch, sighing.

"I've got to get back to the clubhouse," he said, "Will you be okay or do you want to come with me?"

"I want to come with you," Jess said and Jax nodded as they stood, making their way out of the apartment and across the street to the clubhouse.

The entire club plus Gemma were sitting around on the couches and chairs, discussing what the next step would be as Jax and Jess walked in. Gemma walked up to them, kissing Jax on the cheek before pulling Jess into a hug. Jess found herself clinging onto Gemma as she hugged her back, Luann's best friend. Gemma eventually pulled away, grasping Jess's shoulders as she looked down at her.

"She loved you," Gemma said and Jess nodded, feeling her eyes well up again but fought the tears back as Jax pulled a few chairs up and they all took a seat in the circle. Clay walked up, snapping his pre-pay shut as he looked around at everyone.

"It'll be a few hours before Lux can get into a bail hearing," he said, "I'm gonna go up and talk to Lux."

"I'm coming with you," Jess said immediately, standing up, "I need to talk to her." Gemma eyed her warily.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Gemma asked. Jess nodded fervently.

"I have to know what happened last night," Jess said emphatically.

"Well, then I'm going, too," Gemma stated. Clay shook his head.

"She won't talk if we're both there," he said to her and she frowned, crossing her arms across her chest as she looked at him, "You know she won't," Clay added and Gemma sighed.

"Fine," she grumbled. Jess took one last look at Jax, giving him a small smile, before hurrying out of the clubhouse behind Clay and running to her car parked across the street.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Rosen, the club's attorney, looked nothing like Jess expected. Tall and young, with a Tom Ford quality about him, Jess pictured him practicing somewhere much more glamorous than Charming, CA. He was waiting for Clay in the entrance hall at the station, striding purposefully up to him as he and Jess walked through the front doors.

"Bail hearing's set for 2:00," he said, "I've spoken with the DA, she's an old friend. I think we can get Lux bail if she agrees to wear an ankle monitor. She'll be allowed at home and that's it." Clay nodded, rubbing his eyes with his fingertips.

"She'll agree," he mumbled as he and Jess followed Rosen down the hall to Lux's cell. Rosen pointed it out to them before leaving to give them some privacy and they walked the short distance to the cell. Lux was hunched over on the floor, gripping her knees into her chest. Her mascara had smeared all down her cheeks, which were still damp from her tears, and her hair lay in tangles around her shoulders. She glanced up when they walked over, hopping up quickly from her spot on the floor and dashing to the bars that separated them, gripping them tightly.

"I didn't do it! Someone put that stuff in my car, I swear-" she gasped at them, looking wide eyed between Clay and Jess. Jess stared back at her, part of her feeling like a bitch for thinking, for even a second, that Lux could have had anything to do with what happened that morning. The other part of her, the part currently dominating all of Jess's emotions, really wanted to know where the hell Lux had been, if not at Cara Cara.

"I know, baby," Clay said, reaching through the bars to grip Lux's hand. Lux nodded, looking over to Jess.

"Do you believe me?" she asked, her voice choked. Jess bit her lip as she looked at Lux, finally nodding.

"Of course I do," she said, "I'm sorry for…." Her voice trailed off and she shrugged, but she knew Lux didn't need her to continue. She gave Jess a small smile, nodding.

"I'm sorry, too," she said, her smile fading as she looked at Jess sympathetically, "For you." Jess nodded, glancing at Clay and praying he would get around to asking Lux the question she needed answered. Clay finally obliged.

"Lux… where were you last night?" he asked, "We obviously know you weren't with Jess. Tig says you weren't with him either. And he checked your apartment." Lux looked at him, her eyes widening even further as she shook her head.

"I just… I was at church," she finally said. Clay released her hand, looking at her with surprise as Jess's eyebrows shot up.

"You were at church?" Jess repeated doubtfully. Lux nodded.

"Yeah… I went for a walk. Ended up at that church on Main. I must've been there for hours," Lux said evasively.

"Why were you at church?" Clay asked, his voice grave, "In the middle of the night. For hours." Lux shrugged and Jess saw the anger switch in Clay's eyes.

"LUX!" Clay bellowed, "Tell me. Now." Jess saw Lux begin to visibly shake as tears poured down her cheeks. She'd never seen her looking so scared; not even when the cop was walking her out of the apartment in handcuffs. Lux shook her head forcefully and Clay banged his hand against the bars, causing both Lux and Jess to jump.

"Okay!" Lux finally said, "I… I had a bad night last night. I got upset about some stupid shit and…. one of the croweaters had some blow and…." Lux's eyes turned down as her voice trailed off, refusing to make eye contact with Clay, who was staring at her with wrath.

"You didn't," Clay said, his voice low and furious. Jess looked between the two of them, confused. Lux nodded through a sob as she stared down at the ground and Clay turned around, banging his fist on the wall behind him and wincing in pain as he shook it out.

"I'm sorry!" Lux sobbed, finally raising her eyes to look at her father, "I just did one line and I freaked out the second I did it! That's why I went for a walk and ended up at that church. And when the sun came up I walked over to an NA meeting I knew was going on. Dad, I'm so sorry!"

"You know that shit almost ruined this family!" Clay said, and Jess was surprised to hear his voice choke up slightly, "Almost took you away from us! Almost got you killed!"

"I know!" Lux said desperately, "I know! I swear I won't do it again." Jess stared at Lux in disbelief. She knew Lux didn't like to talk about her past, and she'd mentioned several times the trouble she'd been into before, but Jess had had no idea was an addict. Weren't addicts supposed to stay away from alcohol? And weed?

"How many times have I heard that?" Clay asked angrily, "How many times have you stood exactly where you are now, swearing you'll never do it again?" Lux shook her head furiously, tears still streaming down her face.

"This isn't like that!" she said, her voice frantic, "It was just one time! And I went to the meeting and I..." her voice broke as it trailed off and Clay's anger was replaced with sadness. He shook his head, pressing his hands against the bars and leaning into them.

"Do we need to send you to rehab again?" he asked urgently, but his voice was calmer now, "Because we will." Lux shook her head.

"No, dad," she said, "I'm done. It was a stupid one-time thing. It's not my life anymore." Clay nodded.

"Whoever gave it to you, I want them banned," he said, his voice somber. Lux nodded, sighing as she leaned against the bars.

"This is all just so fucked up," she muttered.

"So you were never at Cara Cara, then?" Jess asked, redirecting the conversation. Lux glanced up at her, her lips forming an even line.

"No," she said, "You know me. You know I could never do something like that to Luann. I was at that stupid church, and then NA all morning. I didn't get back to the apartment until right before the cops showed up. Said they'd gotten an anonymous phone call about seeing me at Cara Cara last night with a baseball bat."

"How'd the bat get in your car?" Jess wondered out loud. Lux shrugged.

"As far as I know, my car never left the parking spot. Check the TM cameras. I bet you can see it on there," Lux replied.

"We'll check the cameras," Clay promised, "In the meantime, Rosen says he can get you bail with an ankle monitor. You won't be able to leave the apartment." Lux nodded, sighing.

"Okay," she said.

"Your hearing's at 2:00. I gotta get back to the clubhouse but I'll be here to pick you up," Clay said. Lux nodded, sniffling slightly as her tears began to cease.

"I love you," she said quietly. Clay gave her a small smile, reaching through the bars to grip her hand once more.

"I love you, too, baby girl," he said, "Don't worry about this. We'll figure it out. We always do." Lux nodded, her eyes flashing the briefest hint of doubt, before she smiled back at him.

"Of course we will," she said.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess walked into the clubhouse that night to find it much more somber than usual. Lux had made bail and was now confined to the apartment, and Jess had decided to give her some alone time with Tig while Jess searched for her own old man. She knew he was at the clubhouse somewhere, but scanning the room she only saw the other sons, several croweaters, and a couple of hang-arounds she recognized but didn't know.

Jess walked down the hall toward the dorms, noticing one of the croweaters stumbling into the bathroom before she finally found Jax in his dorm room, sitting in a recliner with his head in his hands. He glanced up as she walked in, shutting the door behind her, and he sat up, allowing her to crawl into his lap as he wrapped his arms around her.

"How you holdin' up?" he asked softly, stroking her arm with his fingertips. She shrugged, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Just trying not to think about it," she said, "Gemma said she'd handle the funeral. I just… it still hasn't sunk in that I'll never talk to her again. And Cara Cara's gone. And Lux… It's so much. How do you deal with this?" Jax sighed, gripping her tighter in his arms as he pressed his lips gently against her forehead.

"I wish you didn't have to," he replied sadly. She looked up at him, tears brimming her eyes again.

"It's my fault, Jax," she whispered. He frowned as he shook his head, his eyebrows creased in worry.

"No, Jess, you can't do that to yourself," he said. She sniffled, nodding her head.

"She told me she was going over to the clubhouse. One of the security guys called to tell her there'd been a break in. I told her to take one of you with her but she said she'd be fine with the security guys and I just… I just let her leave. By herself," Jess explained, struggling not to start crying again.

"This is not your fault," Jax said gently, "We don't even know everything that happened. There wasn't anything you could've done for her." Jess shrugged, leaning her head back on Jax's shoulder, wishing she could believe the words he was telling her. They sat like that in silence for several moments before Jax spoke again.

"What security guy called her?" he finally asked. Jess lifted her head to look at him, shrugging.

"I don't know, she didn't tell me," she said.

"Has anyone been hired in the last couple months?" he asked. Jess nodded.

"We've got a couple new guys," she said, "Why? You think it was a set up?"

"I'd bet on it," Jax responded grimly, "Might even be one of Zobelle's guys that got hired." Jess shuddered.

"Why is he doing this?" she asked meekly, but Jax knew it was a rhetorical question and he didn't respond.

"I gotta meet with the guys," Jax sighed, running a hand through his hair. Jess nodded, standing from his lap so Jax could stand up. He wrapped his arms around her once more, kissing her fiercely as her fingers wrapped into the back of his cut, wanting to stay secure in his arms forever. They eventually pulled apart and Jess gave him a small smile before turning to walk out of the room, Jax close behind her. As she turned out of his room, her eyes fell upon the door to the bathroom at the end of the hall and Jess's eyes narrowed, remembered the disheveled look of the croweater that had walked in just as Jess had walked into Jax's room. She glanced back at Jax.

"Hang on a second," she said, walking towards the door and pressing her ear against it as Jax watched her curiously. Jess felt her blood boil as she heard the tell-tale sounds of someone snorting coke. She felt a fury build inside of her that she hadn't felt before, knowing that it was this stupid bitch behind the door that was responsible for the mess Lux was in right now. If she hadn't brought the blow to the party, Lux would never have taken it and she'd never have left the clubhouse. She wouldn't be framed for Luann's murder and Jess would be able to grieve in peace.

Every emotion that had been weighing Jess down all day manifested itself in pure rage and all she saw was red. Forgetting that Jax was standing several yards behind her, forgetting where she was, almost forgetting _who _she was, Jess barged into the bathroom, startling the croweater into dumping several lines of coke on the floor.

"Shit!" the croweater shrieked, immediately getting on her knees to collect it. Jess sneered at her, walking into the bathroom and standing over her before bringing her foot back, kicking her hard in the side. The girl collapsed, howling in pain as Jess kicked her repeatedly, finally straddling her and punching her hard in the nose. Jess had never punched anyone before but barely registered the pain shooting through her fist and up her wrist as she brought her fist back to punch her again. The croweater pulled her hands up, struggling to block her face from Jess's attacks, but she couldn't see straight. Right now, Jess blamed this girl for everything wrong in her life and it felt good.

"Jess!" she heard Jax yell, but she didn't stop hitting the girl until Jax had grabbed her around the waist, lifting her easily from the ground as the girl remained on the floor, moaning.

"She gave Lux coke!" Jess shrieked, struggling to get out of Jax's grip. She felt his grip weaken in surprise at her words, almost allowing her free, before he tightened his arms around her again. The croweater had risen to her feet by now, her nose dripping blood, and she stared murderously at Jess.

"You crazy bitch!" the croweater shrieked.

"Get the fuck out of here!" Jax yelled at her and she turned disbelievingly to look at Jax. Jess stared at the girl's face. Black and blue bruises were already beginning to form and she was touching her nose gingerly as if it had been broken.

"But… Jax?" she said. Jax shook his head as Jess finally began to calm down in his arms. He retained his grip on her with one arm as with the other arm he pointed down the hall.

"Out!" he yelled again, "Do not come back here."

The girl ran off and as Jess watched her leave she couldn't help but realize her face was looking a lot like Ima's had, all those months ago. She stared at her retreating back, noticing with surprise that she didn't feel an ounce of guilt over what she had done and suddenly realized what it felt like when someone threatened your family.

"I get why you beat the shit outta Ima," Jess muttered as Jax relaxed his grip on her, letting her go. Jax chuckled softly, taking her right hand in his and kissing her knuckles softly.

"I don't know if that's a good thing," he said, smiling and shaking his head at her before throwing an arm around her shoulder, "Come on, let's get you some ice for your hand."

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**I hope you liked this chapter! The story will continue to get a little darker and darker as we finish up the story lines we had in the original New Start, but we're getting towards the end of what we'd already written and are excited about the new stuff we have planned for the story that hasn't been seen before. Originally, we were just going to write a sequel to New Start because we had a lot of ideas for what we wanted to do with it, but decided to rewrite the original and just segue right into the sequel instead of making it two separate stories.**

**So I guess what I'm saying is, it won't stay super dark forever, but it does get to a really dark place before it all gets resolved and they start to get out of it. You'll want to remember I said that later! :)**

**Anyways, it's late while I'm writing this and I'm rambling so please let me know what you thought about this chapter and I will love you forever!**


	25. Chapter 25

Jax took one last look at Jess sitting on the couch in the clubhouse, a cloth filled with ice clutched to her fist as she stared down at a magazine, before following his brothers into the chapel. He was worried about her, but a part of him couldn't help but being proud of the way she'd wailed on that croweater for Lux. He'd have to find the girl later, make sure she wasn't going to be an idiot and press charges or something. That was the last thing they needed right now.

He took a seat, looking around at the grim faces staring back at him. Zobelle had been a nightmare for them the last time they'd dealt with him, but this time they all knew what they were up against and it wasn't pretty. He looked at Tig, his tortured but determined face showing how much he really cared about Lux, and Jax found himself actually feeling grateful for that. He was not the only one taking this personally.

"What's the news from Rosen?" Jax asked, opening the meeting as he looked across the table at where Clay sat at the end.

"Lux's alibi partially checked out," he said, "Cameras put her walking into the church around 6 in the morning and then leaving close to 7. But Luann's time of death came back at 5 AM. Cause of death was a blow to the head, probably by a baseball bat. She was dragged out of the building and left out front before the building was set on fire. If Lux had her car, she'd still have had time to do that and get to the church by 6."

"But she didn't do it," Tig said harshly.

"Of course she didn't do it," Clay responded, "I'm just telling you how it looks."

"But you said if Lux had her car. She said her car never left the parking spot," Jax said.

"We checked the cameras out front of TM," Juice said, "Her car leaves, takes off about 4:30. You can't see who's driving. The passenger seat was facing the camera and you can't get a good look at the driver. It returns this morning and the driver did a good job of hiding from the cameras."

"We all know this was Zobelle," Jax stated through gritted teeth, "He likes to get to us through our women."

"Got to all of them except Gemma in one swoop," Juice said. Jax shook his head.

"Nah, he fucked up with Gemma last time. It backfired against him. She's not scared of him and he saw Jess and Lux – both old ladies _and_ daughters – and he made sure they would be," he said angrily. That was why he had shot up Jess and Lux's apartment. He'd given a lot of thought to Zobelle ever since he revealed himself. He knew exactly where that fucker's head was at. They all nodded in agreement.

"So we also know that baseball bat is going to come back with Luann's blood and Lux's prints," Bobby said, "Zobelle wouldn't plant evidence like that unless it was smoking gun." Jax nodded.

"So the question becomes how do we prove it and what do we do about it," Jax said.

"First step is to find the motherfucker," Opie said, turning to Juice.

"He's gone completely underground," Juice responded, "No sign of him since he showed his face at Cara Cara."

"Unfortunately we're in a position where we need him alive. At least until we can prove Lux didn't kill Luann and get her off," Jax said in frustration, "Juice, you got a list of properties with ties to Zobelle?" Juice nodded.

"Yeah, but there's at least 50. Some are functioning businesses, others are warehouses or abandoned houses. It'll take forever to hit them all," he said.

"See if there's any way to narrow it down," Jax told him, "He's gotta be close by, so check the properties within 200 miles. Cross off any businesses. Let me know what's left." Juice nodded and Jax sighed.

"Alright I think that's all we're going to be able to do tonight," he said miserably, "But the sooner we figure this shit out, the better. We don't need any more problems than we already have. Luckily the niners are being cool about waiting for their guns, but the others may not be so understanding. And if we wait too long to sell, the Irish Kings might have to pay us a visit and nobody wants that."

Everyone nodded in agreement as Jax hit the gavel again and they filed out of the chapel. Jess looked up as the chapel doors opened, smiling as she saw Jax and he held his hand out to her. She stood, taking his hand in hers and he led her back to his dorm.

They walked inside and Jax sat down in the recliner opening his arms for Jess as she crawled into his lap, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"When are we just going to be able to be happy together?" she asked, recalling how she felt when they'd first gotten together. How she couldn't stop skipping and smiling. She just wanted that feeling back, but her heart was so heavy at the moment she wondered if it'd even be possible. Jax sighed, wrapping his arms tightly around her.

"When this is over," he replied.

"Is it ever over?" Jess asked desperately, "Or is there always just one more thing?" Jax shook his head.

"It'll be over," he assured her, knowing as he said it that he was lying through his teeth. But he knew she didn't need truth right now. Not today. Today, she needed some peace. She looked up, shifting her weight so she straddled him on the chair. He smiled up at her, running his hands up and down her back as she looked into his eyes.

"Take my mind off of everything," she begged him, "Distract me." He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tight against him as his lips roamed up her neck. She smiled, allowing the horrible day to be forgotten while she focused on the one thing in her life she was truly happy about: Jax.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess awoke the next morning, allowing herself as many seconds as she could to think that yesterday had just been a horrible nightmare. It was a wonderful feeling as she felt her heart begin to repair itself, knowing that she'd be going to work today and seeing Luann.

But it was short lived. Reality came crashing down on her all too soon and her heart ripped once again, though not as badly as yesterday. Jess felt like maybe every day it would be a little less painful, get a little easier, until it became just a constant minor pain, like an annoying head ache you can't get rid of. It doesn't cripple you, but it still hurts.

She stood up quietly, careful not to wake him, as she made her way out of the dorm room and down the hall towards the kitchen to get some coffee. She saw Gemma sitting with Abel on the couch and stopped in surprise as she saw Rosen sitting next to her.

"There she is!" Gemma said, bouncing Abel on her knee, "Jess, Rosen needs a word with you." Jess stared between the two of them, wondering what on earth an attorney would need with her before nodding once and turning into the kitchen to pour a large cup of coffee. She took a few sips before walking back into the room and Rosen stood.

"I was hoping we could speak somewhere privately," he said and Jess looked toward Gemma.

"Use the chapel," Gemma said, pointing at the large redwood doors. Rosen gestured toward the doors, waiting for Jess to walk towards them before following her inside. Jess sat nervously in one of the chairs on the far side of the table as Rosen took the seat across from her. He set his briefcase on the table, popping it open and pulling several files out before finally looking back at Jess.

"I'm not sure if you're aware, but on top of being the club's attorney, I am also the executor of Luann's will," he began. Jess raised her eyebrows at him in surprise, nodding slowly as she waited for him to continue.

"Luann came to me several months ago to change both her and Otto's will," he said, "With Otto in prison indefinitely, she left everything… to you." Jess stared at Rosen, barely able to process what he had just told her.

"What?" she asked in disbelief. Rosen nodded, closing his briefcase and setting it on the floor as he flipped through several files.

"In liquid assets, so all of Luann's savings, stocks, bonds, property, and possessions, it comes out to right around $500,000," he said and Jess balked at him, her eyes widening. But it seemed he wasn't through yet.

"She also left you her portion of Cara Cara," he said, "She owned 80% of the business, the Sons owning the other 20%. With her share of the insurance money from the fire, it comes to 2.5 million dollars."

Jess continued to stare at him, part of her wanting to tell him to give it all to charity. That she did not want to profit from Luann's death. The other part of her thought about what she could do with 3 million dollars. She could take the money and she, Jax, and Abel could start over somewhere else. Somewhere far away where murder wasn't just another Tuesday and they didn't live in a constant state of fear.

"Of course it'll be up to you in terms of rebuilding Cara Cara," he said, "As 80% owner, you hold the deciding vote. But if you decide not to rebuild, you'll need to take that up with the Sons." Jess nodded, barely registering anything he told her.

"I, um, I also have her personal effects for you," he said hesitatingly, "The items found on her person when they brought her body in." He handed over a small plastic bag containing Luann's wedding ring, large hoop earrings, and her charm bracelet. Jess stared at the pieces of jewelry for several moments before setting the bag aside, staring back at Rosen.

"Thank you," she said softly and Rosen nodded, standing up from the table and reaching his hand out. Jess stood as well, shaking his hand and grabbing the plastic bag he'd given her before making her way out of the chapel and back to Jax's room. He was awake when she walked in, still lying in bed. He smiled, patting the bed next to him and she smiled back at him. She set the bag down on the desk in the room and crawled back in the bed, cuddling next to him.

"I missed you," he said grinning. She smiled, looking up at him. She didn't tell him about the money. She didn't know why she wasn't telling him, but something told her she needed to figure out what the hell she was going to do with it before she made that particular announcement. The secrets just seemed to be piling up.

"What was in the bag?" he asked and Jess glanced sadly at the bag lying on the desk before turning to look back at Jax.

"Luann's personal effects. Rosen brought them over this morning. It was just her jewelry. I wonder if they'd let me give Otto the wedding ring," Jess mused.

"You'd have to call Stockton and get it approved," Jax told her. Jess nodded, thinking about the charm bracelet in the bag and her body began to feel as if it were filling with pressure as she blinked back several tears. Jax ran his hand gently up and down her arm comfortingly as he let Jess cry into his chest, wishing there was some way he could make everything better for her.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Later that afternoon, Jess decided she needed to go see Lux. She hadn't seen or spoken to her since she saw her at the police station the day before and her outburst while Lux was getting arrested was still weighing on her. She now felt more than just the simple "I'm sorry" she'd thrown out while visiting Lux in jail was needed when you accuse your best friend of murdering your step mother. As she walked up the stairs to her apartment she found she was nervous to talk to her.

She walked into the apartment to find the living room empty and laughter coming from Lux's bedroom. She froze, remembering Tig was staying here while Lux was under house arrest and debated running out. But before she could decide, Lux tumbled from her bedroom, laughing and wearing a short skirted black and white striped outfit, the monitor firmly attached to her ankle.

"I'm pretty sure we have whipped cream in the fridge," she shouted over her shoulder as she began walking down the hall. She stopped when she saw Jess, grinning broadly without the slightest hint of embarrassment.

"Oh, hey, Jess," she said, "We were just playing a little jailbird and naughty guard." Jess raised her eyebrows at her, smiling back as she shook her head.

"You guys are crazy," she said and Lux's grin widened as she shrugged, continuing on down the hall and turning into the kitchen. Jess followed her in while Lux dug through the fridge.

"It makes it easier if we can joke about it, you know?" Lux said and Jess nodded as she took a seat at the bar in the kitchen. Lux finally closed the fridge after grabbing a can of whipped cream and walked over to stand on the opposite side of the bar from Jess.

"So I wanted to apologize, again," Jess said, "You know, for what I said to you." Lux shook her head.

"I get it, Jess," she said, "Luann had just died. No one should be accountable for what they say after something like that." Jess gave Lux a small smile, shaking her head and wondering what she'd ever done to deserve a friend like Lux.

"Anyway, I'm more upset about my family all thinking I'm a junkie again," Lux continued, shuddering. Jess nodded.

"Yeah, I… uh… I didn't know that about you," she said. Lux shrugged.

"Not something I really want people to know, you know?" she said, "It's not something I'm particularly proud of. I actually liked that you didn't know that about me." She sighed, shrugging.

"But you're okay now?" Jess asked tentatively. She'd seen what hard drugs could do to a person through Daisy. She didn't want that for her friend, too. Lux nodded, giving Jess a small smile.

"Heard you kicked the shit out of that croweater that brought the blow," she said. Jess laughed, shaking her head.

"I don't know what came over me," she said. Lux nodded.

"I do," she said, "You love me." Jess rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, I guess I do," she said. Lux laughed, nodding. Her smile faded as she leaned over the counter, closer to Jess.

"I'm really scared, Jess," she said quietly, "I feel like the cops have it out for me or something. They're not even looking for any other suspects. And I just know that bat is going to come back with my prints on it somehow and then what'll I do?" Jess frowned, nodding sympathetically. She was terrified for Lux, but she knew how she felt was nothing to what Lux was feeling.

"They'll figure it out," she said, "You've got the best guys on your side. We know who really did it. They'll find a way to prove it." Lux nodded confidently, much more confidently than Jess was sure she felt.

"You're right. Of course you're right," she said.

"Lux! You got that whipped cream yet!?" They heard Tig call from the back, "My balls are the size of California here!" Lux grinned, shaking her head.

"Oopsie," she said, "Gotta go. I tied up the naughty guard." Jess laughed, watching as Lux grabbed the whipped cream and pranced back to her bedroom.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess walked back across the street to the clubhouse to see Jax in one of the bays, working on a car. He was bent over the hood, peering into the engine and Jess stopped behind him to appreciate the view for several moments before walking up to him, wrapping her arms around his waist from behind. He set the wrench he was holding down and turned around to look at her, leaning against the hood of the car as she stepped in between his legs. He smiled at her as he grabbed a rag from his pocket to wipe the grease off his hands.

"How's Lux?" he asked.

"Scared," Jess replied, "But hanging in there." Jax nodded, sighing.

"I don't know what to do about this, Jess," he admitted, "I got no ideas on how to prove it wasn't her." Jess nodded, glad for the opportunity to be the strong one for once; to be _his_ comforter.

"Her trial is months away," she said, "I know this guy is smart but there's no such thing as a perfect murder. He fucked up somewhere. We'll figure it out." He smiled down at her, cocking an eyebrow.

"_We_?" he asked. Jess nodded.

"Hey, I'm the one that found Abel, right?" she said, grinning, "Maybe I'll solve this one, too." Jax's smile widened as he nodded.

"I hope so. Because apart from finding him and torturing out a full confession, I got nothing," he said.

"Well glad to know there's a backup plan just in case," Jess said lightly. Jax gave her a small smile but he didn't laugh and Jess's grin faltered as she looked up at him.

"What?" she asked. He shook his head, leaning down to kiss her lightly on the forehead.

"I just can't believe you're still here," he said. Jess froze, thinking for a split second he'd heard about the money and had read her mind about her idea of them getting the hell out of Charming. But then she realized he was just talking about everything else that had happened. She shook her head.

"I knew what I signed up for," she told him, "And right now, you're about the only good thing I've got going in my life." He smiled at her, wrapping his arms around her.

"Back at you," he said softly, kissing her again. They didn't pull apart until Gemma cleared her throat from behind them and Jess turned around to look at her.

"I was going over to Luann's to pick something out for her to wear at the funeral," she said, and Jess felt the small bit of happiness she'd been feeling with Jax turn to ice, "I thought maybe you'd want to come." Jess nodded, turning back to look at Jax and give him one final kiss. He gripped her hand, looking down at her.

"You gonna be okay?" he asked. Jess nodded as she walked off to follow Gemma to her Cadillac and climbed in the passenger seat. Neither said a word the entire drive to Luann's house and as they pulled up and stepped out of the car. Jess gazed up at the house remembering, briefly, that it was hers now. It was a sprawling Spanish style home sitting in a cul-de-sac, the detached garage connected to the house by an archway. Jess glanced at Gemma as she strode purposefully up to the front door that stood under a large archway and Jess quickly followed her.

They walked inside to find a beautiful and immaculate home. This didn't surprise Jess, as she knew Luann wasn't here often enough to make a mess. She took several moments to look around, wishing she could have visited Luann here while she was still alive, instead of under these circumstances. She took a deep breath as Gemma walked through an archway on the right and down a long hall, Jess reluctantly following behind.

She ran her hand along the couch as she passed it, picturing Luann sitting there watching TV or reading a book, anything to pass the lonely time. She knew Luann hadn't been happy in her life and Jess wondered why she didn't reach out to her more than just at work or family dinners. Why did she and Luann never have lunch or rent a movie?

Because Jess had thought there'd be time. She didn't know that their time together would be cut so short, not even a year into knowing her and much less than that since she found out about her connection to Luann through Otto. She felt tears brimming her eyes as she pictured Luann in this house, cooking dinner with her, sitting down to a nice meal as they talked about their day. She had loved her. And now Luann was gone.

Jess brushed the tears from her eyes as she walked into the room she'd seen Gemma duck into, which ended up being Luann's bedroom. Jess could hear Gemma rustling through clothes in Luann's walk in closet but Jess didn't join her. She stared around the bedroom – at all the pictures of Luann and Otto around the room: their wedding day, sitting on a motorcycle, standing in front of Cara Cara. Luann looked so happy. Her eyes were bright and shining and Otto was beaming standing next to her.

Jess's eyes then fell upon Luann's bed, the sheets and comforter in tangles from the last time Luann had slept there and Jess gasped, feeling as if the walls were caving in on her as she collapsed onto the ground, sobbing. It wasn't fair. Nothing about this was fair. She needed more time with Luann and her heart was broken for her father, for Otto, who she knew loved Luann more than anything else in the world.

Gemma rushed out of the closet at the sound of Jess's cries and frowned as she saw her huddled in a ball by the bed, crying. Gemma sat next to her, wrapping her arms around her as she pulled Jess close to her and let her cry until Jess ran out of tears.

"Someone needs to tell Otto," Jess finally whispered after her tears had subsided. She wiped her cheeks, knowing her makeup was smeared by now but not caring.

"It's been taken care of," Gemma told her gently. Jess looked over at Gemma, her eyes wide.

"He knows?" she asked. Gemma nodded, "I need to see him. I need to talk to him." Gemma nodded again, running her hands comfortingly up Jess's arms and Jess curled into her, wishing that she were Luann.

"That can be taken care of, too," Gemma told her. Jess nodded, and eventually her sobs subsided and she sat up straighter, sighing. She stood, walking to the closet that Gemma had abandoned to see all of Luann's clothes hanging up. She didn't know what to pick. She didn't know what would be appropriate. Her first thought was a tasteful dress, and Luann had a few hanging in her closet, but Jess had never seen her wear any of them and none of them seemed like her. Gemma joined her soon, holding up a black and red floral patterned corset with a black shrug and Jess grinned, nodding.

"That's Luann," she said. Gemma smiled back at her, nodding as she looked back at the outfit in her hand.

"Yeah, it is," Gemma agreed.

They rode back to the clubhouse in silence. Jess felt Gemma continuing to glance over at her but she ignored it until they had turned onto the street TM was located on and she finally turned to Gemma.

"What?" she asked. Gemma glanced at her pensively before turning her eyes back to the road.

"Have you heard about Luann's will?" Gemma asked. Jess raised her eyebrows in surprise, knowing Gemma wouldn't be asking about Luann's will if she didn't already know, or at least strongly suspect. And Gemma always trusted her intuition.

"Yes," Jess admitted, offering no further information.

"And?' Gemma pushed. Jess sighed, shrugging. She was going to find out one way or another.

"She left me everything," Jess murmured. Gemma nodded, and her lack of surprise affirmed Jess's suspicions that Gemma was part psychic. She was silent as she pulled into the parking lot of TM.

"What are you going to do with it?" Gemma finally asked as she put the car into park. Jess shook her head.

"I don't really want to talk about that right before we bury her," she said. Gemma stared at her for several more seconds before finally nodding and, without another word, stepped out of the car.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Luann's funeral was several days later. The California sun had appropriately decided not to attend and the misty rain and dark skies mirrored Jess's mood. She sat somberly in a white fold out chair in the front row at the cemetery, staring at the casket containing Luann. She wasn't aware of when, but at some point during the burial service she had reached over to grip Jax's hand and he had laced his fingers with hers as she cried quietly.

She gazed down at Luann's charm bracelet in her hand. She had wanted to bury it with Luann, but was now having a hard time letting go of it and knew she couldn't part with it. This was the most personal item she had left of Luann's. She clutched it tightly in her fist, letting a choked sob escape her lips as the casket began to lower into the ground and she stared at it as Jax released his grip on her hand to wrap his arm around her shoulder, allowing her to turn and sob into his shoulder.

The service began to disperse as people hurried to get out of the rain, but Jess and Jax sat there several minutes longer until they were the last ones left. Jess finally stood, walking up to read the tombstone mounted at the end of Luann's grave and a renewed sob escaped as she saw what had been engraved upon it.

LUANN DELANEY

February 19, 1961-March 24, 2013

LOVING WIFE AND MOTHER

Jax walked up behind her, reading the tombstone as well as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, holding her close to him. She hugged him tightly, thankful that he was there for her and she finally gazed up at him, wiping her eyes.

"Your dad is buried here too, isn't he?" she asked. Jax nodded, pointing several rows away. Jess nodded, grabbing his hand and leading him silently over to the row he had pointed out, walking until she saw the grave with John Thomas Teller spelled out across it. She stopped in front of it as Jax looked sadly down at the headstone, gripping Jess tightly in his arms. After several moments, he pulled away from her, crouching down next to the grave and placing his hand on the tombstone.

Jess watched him before looking down once again at the bracelet in her hand, going through all of the charms represented on the bracelet. She saw the crow charm she had on there and smiled sadly. It was one of the only charms they both had on their bracelets. She looked for the Cara Cara charm, the only other charm they both had, and frowned as she didn't see it right away. She went through each charm on the bracelet individually, searching for it, and finally found an empty, broken ring. The Cara Cara charm was missing.

"Jax," Jess said, her heart thumping in her chest. Jax looked up at her, rising from his position and walking over to her.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Luann's bracelet. The Cara Cara charm is gone," she said, holding it out to him to show him the broken ring, "See – it should be on this ring. But it's like it was ripped off." Jax frowned.

"I'm sorry, Jess," he said, obviously unsure why she was so panicked about the charm. Jess shook her head.

"No, Jax, look, that charm was ripped off the bracelet," she said, her voice rising in excitement. He looked at her, his eyebrows raised.

"Where are you going with this?" he asked.

"It must have happened after she died!" she said, "Or when she died. Whoever killed her ripped the charm off her bracelet, as a souvenir or something." Jax frowned, looking at her sympathetically.

"Jess, it probably just fell off," he said. Jess shook her head.

"No, when charms just fall off the ring doesn't look like this. See, it's all bent out of shape and broken," she said, holding it up to him. He eyed it warily.

"Maybe it got caught on something," he said, "I'll bet the charm's sitting on Luann's dresser or something and she didn't have time to get it fixed."

Jess shook her head, sure she was right as she stared down at the bracelet. Whoever had killed Luann had taken that charm with them and she was going to prove it. She just had no idea how.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**Thanks for reading! Please review and we'll post a new chapter on Wednesday! :) **


	26. Chapter 26

Jess was buzzed through the doors of Stockton State Penitentiary, going through the familiar motions of signing in and being searched before she was finally led into the visiting room. She scanned the room quickly for Otto, finally finding him sitting at a table in the far corner. He stood when he saw her and she rushed into his arms, happy for the feel of his embrace. They finally pulled apart and took a seat on opposite sides of the table. Otto reached across the table to take her hand and she gripped his tightly, giving him a tight lipped smile.

"I'm so sorry," Jess whispered and Otto nodded, sighing.

"Me too, Jess," he said, "God knows I loved Luann. More than I thought I was capable of." Jess nodded sadly, brushing a lone tear quickly off her cheek.

"I loved her, too," Jess said, "And she _loved_ you." Otto shook his head, pulling her hand up to his lips and kissing the back of her fingers softly.

"I'm glad you're here," he said, "I don't know who I'd be right now if I didn't know you were still out there." Jess smiled back at him as she remembered she'd brought him something. She dug in her pocket with her free hand, finally pulling out Luann's wedding ring. The prison had given her permission to give it to him and she held it out.

"I thought you should have this," she said. Otto gazed at the ring in Jess's hand, smiling sadly at it as he took it carefully between two fingers, holding it up to look at it. He finally pocketed it, turning back to smile at Jess.

"Thanks," he said. Jess nodded, pausing for several seconds before finally asking him what she needed to ask.

"Rosen explained Luann's will to me," Jess said, and by Otto's simple nod she knew he was aware of the changes Luann had made to her will.

"Yeah, we discussed that," he said, "Didn't think I'd be having that conversation with you for a very long time." Jess nodded, fiddling with the charm bracelet on her wrist before finally looking back up at him.

"I don't know what to do with the money," she admitted, "I don't know if I want to rebuild or take it and get the hell out of dodge." Otto nodded, taking a deep breath.

"I can't tell you what to do there," he said, "That's something you've gotta figure out on your own. But if it's my advice you're wanting – don't go running away from your problems. They've got a way of coming back to you." Jess nodded, sighing.

"I just don't know," she said in frustration, "I mean, I wouldn't leave without Jax, anyway."

"Jax isn't goin' anywhere, I promise you," Otto told her firmly, "Whatever he says, whatever he does, Jax is in Charming to stay. Don't let him go making you false promises of some beautiful life you'll have together away from Charming because it's never gonna happen." Jess stared back at Otto, frowning. Surely if Jax knew about the money she had, if he knew they could get away from all the danger, he'd at least consider coming with her. Wouldn't he?

"Okay," she finally responded, not wanting to argue the point farther and Otto nodded, apparently satisfied.

"How is Jax, anyway?" Otto asked, "He treatin' you good?" Jess smiled, nodding.

"Yeah, that's the one thing I've done right lately," she said. He chuckled, nodding.

"Yeah, that's exactly what I used to say about Luann," he said and Jess grinned, "You keep me updated. He starts giving you shit I can kill 'im from in here. That's not a problem." Jess shook her head, laughing to force herself into thinking he was joking.

"Thanks, but that won't be necessary," she said. Otto leaned back in his seat, looking across at her.

"Alright. But all you gotta do is say the word," he said, "I love you, baby girl." Jess felt her heart, little by little, beginning to repair itself at his words.

"I love you, too," she said.

SOASOASOASOASOASOA

Opie, Jess's babysitter of the afternoon, was waiting for Jess outside and he smiled at her as she walked up, handing her a helmet.

"Visit go okay?" he asked. She nodded, strapping the helmet on as Opie threw his leg over his bike and Jess climbed on behind him.

"Can you stop at the police station on the way home?" she asked. He turned his head as he started the bike up, looking back at her.

"Whatcha need to go there for?" he asked.

"I just need to show Roosevelt something," she said, "One of Luann's charms was ripped off her bracelet. Jax doesn't think it means anything but I just… I just want to tell Roosevelt. Maybe it'll help." Opie looked at her sympathetically and she knew he thought it was useless, too, but he nodded.

"Sure, we can swing by," he said and Jess smiled back at him gratefully before he turned back around and sped off back to Charming.

Opie pulled up to the police department and Jess hopped off the bike, handing Opie her helmet.

"I'll just be a minute," she said and he nodded, his eyes glued to her until she disappeared through the doors. Jess strode up to the front counter, smiling at the officer sitting behind the desk.

"Is Sheriff Roosevelt around?" she asked. The officer looked up at her, an eyebrow cocked.

"Yeah, he's in his office," he said, standing up and leading her back. The officer knocked on Roosevelt's door and Jess heard him holler out to come in.

"Thanks," Jess said to the officer as he nodded, walking back to the front desk as Jess walked into the office. Roosevelt glanced up at her from behind his desk, smiling in surprise at her.

"Jess? Right?" he said and Jess nodded, taking a seat behind his desk, "How can I help you?"

"I wanted to show you something," she said, digging in her pocket and pulling the charm bracelet out, holding it gingerly in her hands, "This was given to me after… after Luann died. She was wearing it at the time. We both have the same charm on our bracelets," Jess continued, holding out her own bracelet and showing Roosevelt the Cara Cara charm, "But hers has been ripped off. I think whoever killed her took it." Roosevelt nodded, looking down at the bracelet before finally looking up at Jess.

"Look, Jess, I know you want to try to explain what happened in some way that you can live with," Roosevelt started, and Jess's face fell. He wasn't taking her seriously either, "I know you're living with Lux Morrow, dating her brother. But all the evidence we have right now is pointing to her."

"But-" Jess began desperately, but Roosevelt cut her off.

"I know you're fairly new to Charming. Been here, what? About a year now?" he asked. Jess nodded, her eyebrows raised at how much information he had on her. They'd just met for the first time when Cara Cara had burned down. Roosevelt leaned forward on his desk, looking at Jess.

"You seem like a nice girl, Jess," he said, "But since you've been around SAMCRO, you've already been shot, your boss murdered, and it's looking like your friend did it. My advice – I think you're in way over your head and you should get out while you can." Jess frowned at him, shaking her head.

"Lux _didn't_ do this!" Jess shouted. Roosevelt looked sympathetically at her, shrugging.

"That'll be for a judge and jury to determine," he told her.

"So you're not even going to _look_ into any other options?" Jess asked, flabbergasted, "She's Clay Morrow's daughter so she must be guilty?"

"I've got a file on Lux Morrow about two inches thick," Roosevelt said, leaning towards her and stabbing his finger on the desk, "She's not just an innocent little girl. She's done some bad shit, just like the rest of them."

"Oh my God," Jess muttered, shaking her head and standing up, snatching the bracelet off the desk as she walked towards the door. She paused, her hand on the door knob as she turned back to look at him, "You're wrong about Lux. I swear I'll prove it to you."

"Hey, my door's always open," he said.

"Yeah, let me just go and do your job for you," Jess said furiously as she stormed out, breathing deeply in anger. Opie handed her the helmet as she walked up and she snatched it out of his hands, slamming it on her head angrily.

"I take it it didn't go well," Opie said. Jess shook her head as they got back on the bike, driving back to Teller-Morrow. As soon as they parked in the lot and got off the bike, Jess tore the helmet off her head, shoving it in Opie's arms as she stormed across the lot to her car.

"Hey, where are you going?!" Opie shouted after her.

"To Luann's!" Jess shouted, wrenching the car door open.

"You can't just go by yourself!" Opie shouted, glancing at his watch.

"Then you better follow me!" she said angrily, throwing herself into her car. If she had to tear Luann's house apart bit by bit, she would prove that charm wasn't anywhere waiting to be repaired. It had been ripped off her bracelet by whoever killed her. Jess was sure of it.

Opie shook his head, jogging into the clubhouse to find Jax leaning over Juice in his 'office' in the corner of the room, going over several of Zobelle's properties Juice had come up with. Jax glanced up at Opie, frowning.

"Where's Jess?" he asked.

"She took off to go to Luann's," Opie replied, "But I'm already late to pick up the kids. I can't go with her."

"So she's by herself?" Jax asked angrily and Opie nodded. Jax glanced around the room, his eyes finally landing on Happy, sitting at the bar.

"Hey, Hap!" Jax called and Happy turned to look at him, pulling himself off the bar stool and walking over to Jax, "I need you to go over to Luann's house. Jess is on her way there. I need you to keep watch."

"You got it," Happy said and Jax nodded as he pulled out his pre-pay, dialing Jess's phone. She answered on the first ring, sounding irritable.

"Hey," she said curtly.

"Hey," Jax replied, "Where's the fire?"

"Not exactly a good phrase to use right now, Jax," Jess said, sighing.

"Sorry. Why're you running off to Luann's without a patch?" Jax rephrased.

"I'm sure one of your minions will be there by the time I get there anyway," Jess said, her voice full of derision. Jax frowned at the phone.

"What is your problem today?" he asked, getting angry at her attitude.

"My _problem_ is that nobody will listen to me about this damn charm!" Jess replied angrily and Jax rolled his eyes, taking a deep breath.

"So what, you're gonna go off to Luann's to try and find it?" Jax asked.

"No, I'm going to Luann's to prove it isn't there," Jess replied. Jax pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration, breathing deeply.

"How're you gonna do that?" he finally asked, struggling to keep his voice calm, "How do you prove something that small isn't there? And if it's not there, it could have fallen off at Cara Cara, or anywhere else Luann's been." Jess sighed, and Jax could tell she was frustrated.

"I've gotta do _something_, Jax," she said, helplessness replacing the anger in her voice, and Jax understood. It was why he'd spent two days going over the same half dozen properties Juice had turned up, even though he knew the information was useless. Because sitting still and doing nothing while your world collapsed around you wasn't an option.

"Alright," he finally said, "I'm sending Happy after you."

"Okay," Jess said softly, finally calming down, "Sorry I snapped at you."

"Yeah, it's okay. Just be safe," Jax said and heard the phone click. He shut his own phone and looked at Juice, shaking his head as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Women, huh?" Juice asked and Jax glared at him.

"Shut up," he said, pointing back to the computer to go through the list with him one more time.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess pulled into Luann's driveway, unsurprised to see Happy sitting on his bike smoking a cigarette, but she _was_ curious to know how he'd beaten her there.

"Hey, Happy," she said in greeting. He nodded to her as she strode up to the front door, letting herself in as she looked around, wondering where to begin. The bedroom seemed like a good place but Jess wasn't looking forward to walking back in there, so she started in the living room. She pulled cushions off the sofa, ran her hand along every shelf in the room, moved furniture to check underneath it. No charm.

She sighed, looking around the room. Jax was right. This was hopeless. How do you look for something that you're hoping you don't find? She shook the thought away, marching into the kitchen to go through every drawer, bowl, and fork and still she didn't find the charm.

She made her way down the hall, gazing hesitantly at the door at the very end that led to Luann's bedroom. She knew she'd need to hit it eventually, but now was not that time. She went through two guest bedrooms before finally walking into Luann's office to see a very sophisticated computer system sitting atop a large L-shaped desk that took up nearly half of two walls. There were four monitors spaced out on it, all the screens black. Beyond that, the room was pretty minimal.

Jess walked over to the desk to look through the pen holder, stacks of paper, and under the keyboard. As she lifted the keyboard, her hand brushed the mouse and all four monitors popped on, startling Jess. She gazed at the monitors strangely. Three of them looked like they were recording security footage. There were four boxes on each screen, and most of them were snow, as if the feed had been lost. But one of them was still live.

Jess gazed at the video in front of her. It was still, the only movement being the wind whistling through the trees. What she was looking at was the charred remains of the entrance of Cara Cara. The camera must have been affixed to a light pole in the parking lot.

Jess's heart raced as she turned to the fourth monitor, the only one that didn't have security footage running. It just looked like a normal windows desktop, but a program was already opened. In small letters along the top of the program read the words "video surveillance system." Jess frowned, pursing her lips as she clutched the mouse, clicking on open. Thousands of video files poured into the dialogue box that had opened and Jess stared. Each one was dated. She clicked on one from several months ago and looked at the three monitors next to her. Each one now had running footage of every square inch of Cara Cara. Jess grinned in satisfaction, shaking her head.

"Luann," she breathed, "You wonderful, paranoid bitch." She turned to the door of the office, "HAPPY!" she screamed and smiled as she heard him running down the hall. She turned back to stare at the footage for several moments longer before digging into her pocket and dialing Jax's number as Happy rushed into the room, looking wildly around for the danger.

"Hello?" Jax asked as he answered the phone.

"Jax you've gotta get over here. Juice, too," Jess said happily as Happy eyed her curiously. She pointed silently to the monitors and Happy looked over at them, his eyes widening in recognition as she continued talking to Jax, "You're not even going to believe this but Luann had a security system in place at Cara Cara that feeds to monitors at her house. It looks like each one records each day automatically. Months' worth of files are saved."

"Holy shit," Jax breathed, and she could hear the excitement in his voice, "Have you looked? At the night of her murder?"

"I can't," she said, shaking her head, "I can't watch it. Get over here."

"On our way, babe," he said, hanging up the phone. She stared at the monitors, shaking her head as she breathed a sigh of relief at the ridiculous amount of luck they'd just had. She turned to Happy.

"Will you check the morning Luann died?" she asked, standing up from the chair, "I can't watch it." Happy nodded, taking her place as he scrolled through the files until he found the right date. Jess turned her back to the monitors, fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall as she knew Happy was watching Luann's murder.

"We got 'em, Jess," he said and jess breathed a sigh of relief, hesitantly turning to look back at the monitors. She saw two men, one large and hulking and the other shorter and heavy set, walking into Luann's office, but they both had ski caps on and there was no way to tell who they were. Happy paused the image and looked up at Jess.

"But they don't show their face!" Jess said desperately, disappointment washing over her. Happy shook his head.

"We already know who did this," he reminded her, "We can get justice for Luann on our own. We just have to prove it wasn't Lux. That," he pointed to the men on the monitor, "is clearly not Lux." Jess nodded, her heart beginning to beat again.

"Yeah, you're right," she said happily, forcing her eyes away from the monitor.

SOASOASOASOASOA

The microwave beeped and Jess grabbed the bag of popcorn sitting in it, pouring it into a large bowl she had waiting. She walked the bowl over to the living room where Jax was waiting on the couch, popping a piece into her mouth as she took a seat next to him. He took the bowl as she leaned against him and he wrapped an arm around her shoulder as she grinned up at him.

"I told you I'd figure it out," she said and he grinned as she tilted her head up to give him a quick kiss.

"Remind me to never doubt you again," he said.

"I can handle that," Jess said smiling as she reached towards the coffee table to grab the remote, pressing play on the movie they were watching. Jess hadn't felt this good in a long time. Luann's killer may still be out there, but everyone now knew it wasn't Lux and Jess was confident that it was only a matter of time before Jax tracked Zobelle down and put an end to the whole thing. She could finally breathe again and even colors appeared brighter.

The front door flew open halfway into the movie and Jess looked up to see Lux bouncing happily in, followed by Tig who was grinning broadly. Jax paused the movie as Lux strode into the living room, propping her foot up on the coffee table as she pointed to her ankle, now free of the monitor.

"I'm free!" Lux said happily, beaming at Jess, "Thanks to you." Jess shook her head.

"Thanks to Luann," she corrected and Lux shrugged, walking over to the couch and throwing her arms around Jess.

"Just take the thanks," she said, "You saved my life." Jess hugged her back, smiling.

"Well I'm glad everything worked out," she said. Lux nodded.

"Party at the clubhouse to celebrate," she said cheerfully, "Now that I can finally leave this dreaded apartment."

"We'll be by in a little bit," Jax said and Lux nodded, turning back to Tig as she slid an arm around his waist and they walked back out of the apartment.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_** Sorry about the late update! Life got in the way this week and it was insanely busy. Hope you liked this chapter - please let us know what you thought! **


	27. Chapter 27

_**Author's Note: **_**Sorry sorry sorry sorry for taking so long to update! Between moving to a different city this past weekend and 5 different interviews to prepare for between this week and last, I completely forgot when Sunday came and went. So lots of apologies and without further ado I'll let you get to reading :) **

* * *

The credits of the movie began to roll on the screen but Jess barely noticed, concentrating more on the feel of Jax's lips brushing down her neck. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she held him close as he kissed her, wishing they could stay like that. As the DVD ran out and the screen turned blue, Jess sighed and Jax lifted his head, looking down at her.

"What?" he asked, grinning. Jess smiled back at him, shaking her head.

"We've gotta go to Lux's party," Jess reminded him and Jax breathed deeply, nodding.

"Yeah, we do," he agreed, leaning in to kiss her again before standing up. Jess followed his lead and they walked out of the apartment and across the street to Teller-Morrow. The music caused the pavement to pulsate beneath their feet and they finally walked inside the clubhouse to see Lux dancing on the bar while Tig stood under her, handing her shots. Jess shook her head, smiling at the sight of Lux laughing as she tried to pull Tig on top of the bar. It had been ages since she'd seen Lux genuinely laugh.

Jax steered her toward the couches on the other side of the room and he sat down, pulling her onto his lap and she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. She turned to watch Tig handing Lux a bottle of champagne and she shook it before popping the cork, spraying the drink over everyone standing nearby.

"So when are you gonna get up on the bar and dance with Lux?" Jax asked teasingly. Jess rolled her eyes, turning back to look at him.

"You wish," she said. He grinned at her, his expression full of amusement, and she shook her head.

"I'm kidding," he said.

"Yeah, you're a real riot, Teller," she said, kissing him lightly on the lips, "Sorry I'm not as exciting as your sister."

"Thank God for that," he replied, "I couldn't handle another Lux." Jess grinned, throwing her leg over him to straddle him as she kissed him again, his hands clutching her back.

"I think you could handle anything," she whispered.

"Yeah you go on thinkin' that, darlin'," he said quietly before kissing her again. She smiled, wishing they were not currently in a room full of people and were back up at her completely empty apartment, preferably naked….

"Jess?" Jax said and Jess shook her head, snapping back to the present.

"Yeah?" she asked.

"Just making sure you were still with me," he replied grinning. She shook her head, leaning forward to take his earlobe between her teeth.

"I want to be with you somewhere else," she whispered.

"I think we've been here long enough," Jax said, his voice heavy as he gripped her ass in his hands, standing up and throwing her easily over his shoulder. Jess laughed as he carried her out of the clubhouse and back to her apartment.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess woke up the next day wrapped in Jax's arms, smiling as she glanced up at him. She watched as he stirred, slowly opening his eyes to glance down at her watching him.

"Don't do that," he said sleepily and she laughed, kissing him.

"But you're so cute when you're sleeping," she murmured. He snorted, shaking his head as his arms tightened around her. They eventually crawled out of bed and Jess grabbed a robe hanging on the bathroom door, wrapping it around her while Jax threw on a pair of sweatpants and they walked into the living room.

Jess flipped the coffee pot on, waiting a few minutes before pouring two mugs and handing one to Jax before they walked out onto the balcony.

"So I've been meaning to ask you," Jax started after they'd taken a seat on the balcony. Jess looked over at him expectantly, "Any idea what's happening with Cara Cara?" Jess bit her lip guiltily, flicking her eyes away from Jax.

"So you heard?" she finally asked. He shook his head.

"I didn't hear anything," he said, "Especially not from you." Jess sighed, clutching the warm mug in her hands as she looked back at Jax. She was thankful he didn't look angry.

"I should've told you," she said, "I just… I didn't even want to think about it, to be honest." Jax nodded, taking a sip of his coffee as he continued to look at her.

"So what all did Luann leave you?" he finally asked.

"She left me everything," Jess responded and Jax's eyebrows shot up.

"So that's what, a couple million?" he asked. Jess shrugged.

"If I rebuild Cara Cara, I'll have a couple hundred thousand," she said. She took a deep breath, her heart racing as she was finally about to broach the question she'd wanted to ask him for so long. She smiled at him hopefully before she continued, "But if I don't… if I don't rebuild I'd have the insurance money. It'd be enough for us to live comfortably for a really long time. Somewhere... away from all the danger. With Abel." Jax sighed, reaching over to grasp her hand in his and her heart sank at his expression.

"Jess…" he began, "Don't think I've never thought about leaving. There was awhile where I was doing anything I could to get out. But I can't now… I'm president now. I can't just leave the club … or my family." Jess sighed, nodding her head as she leaned back in her chair.

"Yeah, Otto said you'd say that," she mumbled, "I just don't know what to do."

"I'm not gonna pressure you into rebuilding. Obviously I want you to and I hope you do, but it's up to you. We'll figure something else out if we can't use the club to clean up our money," Jax told her. Jess nodded, looking back at him.

"I'll let you know soon," she said. Jax nodded as they both turned back to look out at the TM lot in front of them, falling into silence. Jax eventually looked back over at Jess.

"I gotta get over to TM," he said and Jess nodded as they stood, walking inside. Jax got dressed quickly before walking back into the living room, giving Jess a quick kiss good bye.

"You call me if you need to go anywhere," he said and Jess nodded.

"I know the drill," she said. Jax nodded, reaching to cup her cheek in his palm.

"I know," he said, "I just want to make sure you know that just because we managed to get Lux off doesn't mean the threat's not still out there." Jess nodded at him and he kissed her again before turning and walking outside. She turned back to see Lux stumble out of her room looking like hell, but in a cheerful mood.

"Hey," Lux said, making her way to the coffee pot and pouring a mug.

"How're you feeling?" Jess asked, grinning. Lux shook her head.

"Like shit," she said, "And I've gotta find a job today." Jess raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"Why?" she asked.

"My savings is seriously depleted and dad's not real willing to do me a lot of favors right now. He's still pissed about Tig _and_ the whole coke thing. He's actually threatened to start charging me rent," Lux shuddered, rolling her eyes.

"Where are you looking?" Jess asked.

"Probably swing by Georgie's and see if he's got any openings," Lux said, shrugging, "He's been more than happy to take on most of the other Cara Cara girls."

"Georgie's?" Jess asked, searching her brain for where the name sounded familiar, "Georgie Caruso's club?" She remembered Luann briefly mentioning him, and it hadn't been in the most flattering context. Lux nodded.

"Yeah, I know I know, it's a shit hole. It's where most of the Cara Cara girls went, though. The money's not as great, but it's still better than I'd get anywhere else," she said. Jess nodded, frowning. It hadn't really occurred to her all the people put out of work with the destruction of Cara Cara. She'd been so focused on Luann's murder and the frame job on Lux, she hadn't given a second thought to the girls she'd been in charge of.

"Well, you want me to go with you?" Jess asked, wanting to see this place for herself, "I don't have anything else to do today."

"Sure," Lux responded.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess and Lux drove down to the opposite side of town from the ruins of Cara Cara to the outskirts of Lodi as the prosect, Vi Lin, followed closely behind on his bike. Lux flashed her turn signal before turning into a grimy looking parking lot on which sat an even grimier yet nondescript looking building. A large billboard standing tall next to the building flashed the word 'GEORGIE'S' on top of advertisements for NUDE, NUDE, NUDE and $3 you-call-it Tuesdays. Jess grimaced as Lux pulled into a parking space in front and they both stepped out of the car.

"You cannot work here," Jess told Lux as she stood next to the car staring at the building. Lux rolled her eyes.

"It's a strip club," Lux reminded her, "Just like Cara Cara."

"Cara Cara was not like this," Jess muttered as Lux turned to Lin.

"You can wait out here," Lux told him. Lin looked hesitant but finally relented and the girls walked towards the door. Jess hesitated at the door, finding herself not wanting to touch the handle, and Lux sighed, reaching in front of her and swinging the door open.

"Come on," Lux told her and Jess reluctantly followed her inside. It was dimly lit and cavernous inside and Jess's first impression was that the girls on the stage were nowhere near Cara Cara caliber. Drugs had obviously taken a huge toll on the girl currently on the main stage and her eyes looked out of focus, her face miserable. Georgie must have thought Christmas had come early when her girls had had to come here.

Lux looked around, finally spotting a chubby looking guy with short hair that accented his receding hairline wearing a horrible mismatched brown suit. She pointed him out to Jess.

"That's Georgie," she said, "I'm going to go talk to him." Jess nodded, watching Lux walk away as Jess turned to walk around the club. Several of the waitresses she recognized from Cara Cara, but none seemed happy to see her. One of them, Sasha, walked up to her as soon as she spotted her.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Sasha asked.

"Lux is looking for a job," Jess replied.

"Why?" Sasha asked, and Jess could hear a hint of panic in her voice, "Isn't Cara Cara going to be open again soon?" Jess gazed back at her desperate face before flicking her eyes around the room.

"I'm not sure," Jess finally replied, "The details aren't really settled yet."

"Well can you please hurry?" Sasha asked, "This place is a nightmare. Tell Lux she's better off anywhere else. Especially when I _know_ she doesn't need the money."

"What makes it so bad?" Jess asked, wondering if she wanted the question answered.

"Georgie's an asshole," Sasha spat bitterly, "His clients might be even worse. Sure there was the bad egg at Cara Cara, but Luann knew how to deal with shit like that. Georgie's bouncers don't care about the girls at all. They're here to watch Georgie's back and that's that. He expects… _more_… from us, too, if you get my drift."

"More?" Jess asked, confused. Sasha shrugged.

"Even the waitresses have to get on their knees every now and then," she said quietly, "If they want to keep their jobs." Jess's eyes widened. Not only was messing around with clients on work time not expected at Cara Cara, it had been forbidden. Luann had made sure Jess knew that at her very first interview.

"Well… I'll definitely let you know when Cara Cara is back up and running," Jess said, not having the heart to tell her that time may be never. Sasha nodded.

"Just hurry, alright?" she said, "We all want to come back as soon as we can." Jess nodded as Lux walked up to them, her face unsmiling.

"Well, I got a job," Lux said and Jess felt her heart wrench slightly, shaking her head as she followed Lux out of the building.

"Sasha says Georgie makes even the waitresses fool around with the guys," Jess told her as they stepped into the sunshine.

"He tries that with me and he'll get my knee in his balls," Lux retorted, "And then he'll get Tig's bullet in his brain. Georgie knows who I am. He knows better than to try that shit with me. Besides, we both know this is only temporary."

"Lux…" Jess said tentatively, "I'm not sure if I'm going to rebuild." Lux waved her hand dismissively.

"Of course you are," she said as they climbed into the car. Lux pulled out of the lot, Lin once again following closely behind. They sat in silence for most of the way before Jess finally spoke up.

"I talked with Rosen last week," she said. Lux didn't respond, but Jess could tell she was listening, "About how it would work. Cashing in the insurance while the Sons are partners. How long it would take. What we'd have to do." Lux still didn't respond and Jess sighed, leaning back against the chair until Lux finally answered her.

"So what? You're just gonna dump Jax and me and everyone else and disappear again?" she asked, "We're your family. That makes no sense. What makes you think you'd be happier somewhere else alone than here with us?"

"I got shot, Lux!" Jess said, "Luann got murdered. You almost went down for it."

"Yeah, I remember," Lux responded sarcastically, "I was there."

"And things aren't over," Jess said, "Something really bad is going to happen. I can feel it."

"We'll deal with that if it does," Lux said, "But just because you move doesn't mean things are going to be great all the time. Bad things happen outside of Charming, too." Jess sighed, shaking her head.

"Not like this," she muttered. Lux pulled into their parking space and jumped out, slamming the door behind her as she took off up the stairs to the apartment. Jess remained in the car for several minutes, sighing. She had expected Lux to be angry. She just hadn't expected to feel so bad about it.

She had thought that rebuilding Cara Cara was her decision alone, and that the decision would mostly only affect her. It would be slightly inconvenient to the Sons, but they'd be able to work around it. And it wasn't like she'd never be back to visit. But Jax… it was a fairly new relationship and already over the course of it the worst things in her life had happened. They weren't his fault, of course, and she didn't blame him in the slightest. But being close to the club meant putting herself in constant danger. Was Jax worth that? When Jess had a way to get away from it all?

She sighed, more confused than she'd ever been before. She wished with all her heart that she could talk to Luann. Luann would know what to do. A lump in her throat rose as she thought about her step mother and a deep sadness that she hadn't felt in weeks rushed over her, suffocating her. She felt the sudden need to be close to her.

Jess finally stepped out of the car to see Lin still standing by his bike, waiting for her. Jess smiled at him as she turned to act like she was walking up the stairs. She needed time alone to think, and alone meant no loitering prospects hovering over her.

"I'm going upstairs," she told Lin, "You can go back to the clubhouse now." Lin nodded but didn't move, clearly waiting on her to actually walk up the stairs and into the apartment. Jess sighed as she walked up to the apartment and then through the door and across the living room out onto the balcony. She watched Lin walking across the street and then through the TM lot before she turned and walked back towards the front door.

"Where are you going?" Lux asked, still clearly angry with Jess as she stepped out of her room to see Jess with her hand on the door knob.

"Out," Jess replied simply before walking through the door and hurrying back downstairs and to her car. She drove the short distance to the cemetery and found Luann's grave quickly, stepping out of her car as she walked toward the headstone with Luann's name written across it. She sat down in front of it, running her fingertip over the name and the short epitaph: "Loving wife and mother."

"Oh, mom," Jess whispered, tears stinging her eyes, "You'd know what to do. Why didn't you take one of the guys with you? Why didn't you screen your security guards more closely? Why didn't you live? I need you now." She felt the sobs choking her throat and was unable to speak for a moment.

"Would you have married Otto if you knew it was only going to lead to heart break and eventually your murder?" Jess whispered as she stared at the headstone. She thought about Luann's face when she talked about Otto. The love she felt for him had been etched in every corner of her expression and Jess knew that Luann would not have changed a thing. That if she had had the foresight to know that Otto would go to prison for life, leaving Luann alone to eventually be killed, that she would do it all over again for the short amount of time she had gotten to spend with Otto.

But did Jess feel that way about Jax? She felt more for him than she'd ever felt for any man before, but did she have that kind of love and devotion in her heart for him? She wasn't sure, and because she wasn't sure she felt that the answer was probably no. At least, not yet. If she stayed she knew she would only fall harder and harder for Jax, and it would become impossible to leave. Like Luann.

If Jess was going to leave, it would have to be now. Before it became unbearable to be separated from Jax. Before the next time Jess was shot and she wasn't able to walk away from it. Before someone else Jess loved was murdered. Simply being here in Charming at the cemetery alone was dangerous. Jess knew it. She knew it'd been stupid and selfish to go off on her own. How much longer could she live like that?

But could she walk away from everything she had here? She'd found a sister in Lux, a family in the club, and not to mention Rose. Would Rose ask her to stay, after all the danger Jess had been through? Or would she tell her to collect the millions in insurance money and go? Jess couldn't know until she asked her. She stood, taking one last look at Luann's grave as she dusted off her jeans before she headed back to her car.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax sat at the bar at the clubhouse going through some of the new data Juice had given him on Zobelle while he sipped on a beer, not retaining much of the information he was reading. He had been distracted all day by his and Jess's conversation earlier that day and he couldn't help the gnawing fear growing inside of him that she'd decide to leave Charming.

He would have done almost anything for her that she asked him to, but he knew that one request she'd made of him – to go with her – was impossible. But if she left, he didn't know if he'd be able to take it. He also knew it couldn't be him that asked her to stay, especially since part of him knew the best thing for her would be to leave.

His rage towards Zobelle increased. He was already responsible for nearly killing Jess. Now that she had survived, if he was responsible for driving her out of town… Jax didn't know what Zobelle hoped to accomplish with this new vendetta, but something told him it wasn't all about selling guns to black. Whatever it was, he had made a powerful enemy in Jax and he wasn't planning on stopping until Zobelle was very, very dead.

"So I talked to Rosen today." Jax turned his head to see Gemma sitting down next to him looking somber.

"Yeah," Jax said uninterestedly. Gemma nodded.

"He told me Jess came in to see him last week," she said. Jax looked over at her. She'd gotten his attention, "He said she's been asking about how to cash in on the insurance." Jax remained expressionless as he looked back at Gemma. So Jess had already made steps to leave before she'd talked to him about it. Had she been that confident that he'd go with her or had she not even cared?

"It looks like she's planning on leaving," Gemma said.

"Yeah, I know," he said, "We've talked about it." He didn't mention that that morning was the first he'd heard about it.

"And?" Gemma asked. Jax shrugged, turning back to his beer.

"And stay out of it," Jax told her, "It's her decision what to do with that money."

"Jax," Gemma started but Jax stood angrily from the bar, grabbing the file on Zobelle lying on the counter before walking into the chapel and digging his prepay out of his pocket. He dialed Jess's number as he dumped the file on the table, frowning as it went to voicemail. He hit redial with the same outcome. He dialed Lin's number, who he knew was supposed to be with Jess, and heard a phone ring behind the doors in the clubhouse. His eyes narrowed as he walked through the chapel door to see Lin sitting on the couch, reaching for his phone that was sitting on the table. Jax hadn't noticed him come back.

"Where's Jess?" Jax asked. Lin looked up at him in mid-reach.

"She's at the apartment," he replied.

"No she's not," Jax heard his sister say and glanced over to see her sitting with Tig in the corner of the room.

"What do you mean she's not at the apartment?" Jax asked, a new kind of fear gripping him. Lux shrugged.

"She said she was going out," she said.

"And you didn't stop her!?" Jax asked, his voice full of anger as he hit redial on his phone again, begging Jess to answer.

"I figured Lin was going with her," Lux said, shrugging.

"And you didn't think to tell anyone when you saw that he was _here_?" Jax asked.

"I'm sure she's fine, Jax," Lux said placatingly as Jess's voicemail once again picked up.

"Well as long as you're sure!" Jax yelled at her, storming outside as he once again hit redial.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess walked into Rose's house to find her watching TV in the living room. She glanced up, smiling, as Jess walked in and flipped the TV off.

"Hey!" she said as Jess walked into the living room, giving Rose a small smile as she sat next to her on the couch.

"Uh oh," Rose said, taking in Jess's conflicted expression, "What's wrong?" Jess sighed, shaking her head.

"I'm trying to decide whether or not to have Cara Cara rebuilt," she said.

"And if you don't?" Rose asked.

"If I don't, I'd have millions. I could go anywhere I want. Get away from the threats here," Jess said, gazing back at Rose. Rose nodded, looking thoughtfully back at Jess.

"I'm not gonna lie and say I'm happy with everything that's happened to you," she said, "I feel like a lot of it is my fault since I'm the one who wanted you to move up here so bad." Jess started to try and argue with her, but Rose put a hand up to continue talking, "I want you to stay here, obviously, for my own selfish reasons. But I also want you to get as far away from Charming as you can. I had no idea you'd be in so much danger here. But I don't really know if running from danger is better than living in it if it means you have to separate yourself from everyone that makes your life worth living in the first place."

"When'd you get so smart?" Jess asked, giving Rose a small smile. Rose was right, of course. Jess had been completely safe in Santa Barbara, but also completely miserable. The money wouldn't make her happy. _Jax_ made her happy. Lux made her happy. Rose made her happy. And all the guys in the club – her family – made her happy.

There was a sharp banging on the door and Jess glanced at it guiltily.

"Who do you think that is?" Rose asked curiously, beginning to stand up to answer it. Jess put a hand on Rose's arm.

"It's Jax," she said, sighing, "I'll get it. He's pissed."

"How do you know that?" Rose asked.

"I can tell by his knock," Jess muttered as she stood to walk towards the door, "I'm not technically supposed to be out without a babysitter."

"JESSICA TYLER!" Jess jumped as she turned to look at Rose, who was standing with her hands on her hips, "That boy tells you not be anywhere on your own you don't go anywhere on your own!"

"Thank you!" Jess heard Jax shout from behind the door and Jess sighed, finally opening the door to see Jax standing there, fuming.

"What the fuck were you thinking!?" he shouted. Jess took one last glance back at Rose, who was still looking furious, before turning back towards Jax and walking outside, shutting the door behind her. She crossed her arms across her chest as she looked back at Jax, but the anger on his face was gone, replaced by relief. He grabbed her, pulling her into his body and she uncrossed her arms, wrapping them around him.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, "I just needed to think and I didn't want prospects hovering." Jax sighed, running his hands through her hair.

"I get that it's suffocating having someone around all the time," he said, "But there's a lot of people around here, especially me, who would be devastated if something happened to you. It's my job to keep you safe and I can't do that if you go and sneak off." Jess felt tears brimming her eyes as she nodded into his chest. She stepped back to wipe her eyes as she looked up at him.

"I know," she said, "I won't do it again. I just… needed to figure things out." Jax nodded.

"And did you?" he asked. She gave him a small smile, nodding.

"Yeah," she said, "I'm gonna rebuild Cara Cara. I'm staying in Charming." Jax's face broke out in a broad grin as he wrapped his arms around her again, kissing her deeply. She knew right then that she had been wrong about it not being too late to leave Jax behind. She was definitely already in way too deep.

They broke apart and she looked up at his face, certain of only one thing: that without fully realizing it she had fallen completely in love with him. She opened her mouth to say the words but closed it quickly. She'd never said those words to a man before and found she couldn't get them out, so she just smiled up at him. Someday she'd tell him and she could only hope that he felt the same way.

* * *

_**Author's Note: **_**I hope you liked this chapter! Please let us know what you thought by leaving a review! **


	28. Chapter 28

**_Author's Note: _Sorry once again for the late update guys! I know I'm always full of excuses, and I promise I have them, but I won't bore you with them this time (and at least I'm only a day late this week!) Hope you enjoy this latest chapter :) **

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Jess lifted her hand to her forehead, shielding her eyes from the sun as she watched a crew demolish the wreckage of Cara Cara. It had been so thoroughly destroyed by the fire that they were going to have to start from scratch, but Jess had had a lot of fun working with an architect to design the new building and she was excited that they were finally breaking ground. There'd even been enough money to add a second story, and Jess thought that it might be a good idea to use the extra space to open a second bar upstairs.

She felt Jax walk up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and she leaned back against him, smiling.

"Shouldn't you be wearing a hard hat?" he asked, kissing the top of her head lightly and she laughed.

"I think I'm safe all the way back here," she said. She turned around to face him, "I'm glad you were able to tear yourself away from the clubhouse to come out."

"Wouldn't miss it," Jax said, looking out at the construction crew, "You ready to be a business owner?" Jess shook her head.

"Not at all," she said, "But I'll figure it out." Jax nodded.

"Are you hanging out here the rest of the day?" he asked. Jess shook her head.

"No, we're going to the park with Abel and Lux, remember?" Jess asked. Jax's face fell and Jess frowned, "You forgot." Jax nodded.

"I'm sorry Jess. Juice got some new information on Zobelle this morning. I've gotta check it out," he said. Jess sighed.

"You can't come for an hour?" she asked. Jax shook his head.

"I wish I could," he said, his voice so sincere it caused the corners of Jess's lips to tilt in a small smile, "I'll send Miles to go with you guys so you can still go to the park." Jess shook her head.

"I don't want you to come because of my _safety_," Jess said, "I want to spend time with you." Jax sighed, reaching out to pull her close to him.

"Tonight. We'll go do something just you and me," he promised. Jess nodded, smiling up at him.

"Okay, good," she said. He kissed her again as Lux and Abel walked up. Abel ran up to Jax and he lifted the little boy into his arms and kissed him on the cheek as Abel giggled.

"You ready?" Lux asked and Jess nodded.

"Be good for Jess and Aunt Lux," Jax told Abel.

"You're not coming?" Lux asked. Jax shook his head.

"He's very busy and important, Lux. Don't you know?" Jess asked teasingly.

"Oh right, I must have forgotten," Lux said grinning as Jax rolled his eyes. He kissed Jess once more.

"Okay, I'm gonna go tell Miles to follow you over there," Jax said, jogging off in the direction of a group of Sons that had come out to celebrate Cara Cara breaking ground. Jess saw Miles jog up to them and they all headed towards the parking lot.

"What do you want to do first when we get to the park?" Jess asked Abel as he slipped his tiny hand in hers while they walked to the car.

"Swings!" Abel shouted happily as Lux took his other hand and she and Jess swung Abel between them while he laughed. Lux tucked Abel into the car seat in the back before she and Jess hopped in the car and they headed to the park, Miles following behind them.

"After the swings what are you going to do?" Lux asked, peeking at Abel in the rearview mirror and grinning.

"Slide!" Abel yelled gleefully and Jess laughed, turning around to look at him.

"We can get ice cream there, too," she said and Abel beamed at her.

"Ice cream!" he repeated and Jess laughed, nodding. They finally pulled into the parking lot at the park - it wasn't a far drive - and Jess and Lux climbed out of the car before helping Abel out of his car seat.

"Abel, where are your shoes?" Lux asked, staring down at Abel's bare feet.

"I don't like shoes," Abel said. Jess looked amusedly at Lux.

"Are you sure he's your nephew?" she asked jokingly and Lux rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

"He must be adopted," she said.

"What's adopted?" Abel asked. Lux's eyes widened and she tried to hide a smile.

"Nothing, Abel," she said. She turned to Miles, who had parked next to them, and pulled a couple of bills out of her wallet.

"Will you go grab Abel an ice cream cone while we get his shoes on?" she asked, pointing at the ice cream stand several yards away. Miles nodded, taking the money and walking over while Lux bent into the back seat to retrieve the shoes Abel had kicked off.

As Lux bent down to slide Abel's shoes on, a windowless black van pulled up next to them, the side door sliding quickly open and everything that happened next felt as if it was happening in slow motion.

"JESS!" Jess heard Miles call and turned to see him running towards them, dropping the ice cream cone in the grass as he ran furiously, wrenching his gun out from his belt, "LUX!"

Jess turned around, her heart racing as she struggled to overcome the panic threatening to consume her as four men dressed all in black, ski masks pulled over their face, jumped out of the van. Before Miles could fire a shot at them, one of them raised a gun and shot him in the middle of the forehead. Jess screamed as Abel began sobbing and Miles' body crumpled instantly, slumping onto the ground, the arm holding his gun still outstretched as the gun fell from his hand and landed on the grass. Screams erupted from people around the park, all of them running in different directions for cover. But Jess didn't get a chance to run away. Instinctively she reached for Abel as one of the men neared her. He gripped her around the waist and she let go of Abel.

"Run!" Jess shrieked, praying the men were only here for her and Lux. Praying that they let the toddler go. Abel took off running, but his tiny legs couldn't carry him fast enough and Jess watched one of the masked men run after Abel and grab him as she and Lux were thrown into the van.

"No!" Jess shrieked, tears pouring down her face as the man carried Abel to the van, tossing him inside as the others all climbed in, slamming the door behind them and the van sped off.

Abel was sobbing and Lux was busy kicking anything and anyone she could, so Jess grabbed Abel, pulling him into her lap and he curled up, gripping her t-shirt as he sobbed into her chest. Jess wrapped her arms around him protectively, unable to erase the vision of Miles shot right in front of her out of her mind. He was dead. They had killed him. Just like that.

These guys had already proven that they were willing to kill, and Jess had never felt more scared in her life. One of the men tied Jess' ankles and wrists together, but she was still able to wrap her arms around Abel. Lux, too, had been tied up.

Jess looked around at the men who had all, by now, pulled their ski masks off and weren't paying them the slightest bit of attention. She knew the fact that they were allowing them to see their faces wasn't a good sign. Jess tried to turn her head so she could look out the front window and see where they were going, but her view was blocked. She glanced over at Lux and knew Lux could see the fear in her eyes as she gave her a comforting smile.

"It'll be okay," she mouthed silently to Jess, and Jess wanted so desperately to believe the words were true so she nodded as she repeated the words in a whisper in Abel's ear.

Jess had no idea how long they had driven for. It felt like days but was probably only a couple of hours. The panic racing through her had seemed to shut off her sense of time. Abel had stopped crying and had calmed himself down, still huddled on Jess's lap with her arms wrapped tightly around his small body. Every scenario of their escape flitted through her mind, each as unlikely as the next.

She knew her first responsibility was to make sure nothing happened to Abel. She didn't know what these guys wanted or what they hoped to accomplish, but she couldn't count on them showing mercy to the child. She and Lux would have to protect him.

Eventually, the van came to a stop and the four men jumped up, opening the van door and hopping out before turning back to look at the girls and Abel. One of them reached in and wrenched Abel from Jess's arms and she looked on, horrified, as Abel began screaming, holding his hands out for Jess. A second later, a hand wrapped around her own wrist and jerked her out of the van, Lux following behind. The ties around her ankles were cut so she could walk.

Jess stood next to the van looking up at an isolated warehouse in the middle of the woods. There probably wasn't another soul around for miles. No one to hear them scream. She felt the blood rush to her brain and she couldn't think straight.

The men shoved them forward and they walked towards the warehouse where a lone man was standing in front of the door holding a sawed off shot gun. He nodded at the men, stepping aside to allow them to enter before taking his place in front of the door again. They all filed inside and Jess looked around. It was one large room with a foreman's office on the far side of the warehouse. Several long tables were set up on Jess's right, each covered in piles and piles of bags full of a white substance.

"Heroin," Lux whispered in Jess's ear, seeing what she was seeing. Jess nodded as she turned her eyes forward and away from what must be millions of dollars' worth of drugs. The men stopped in front of a storage closet and Jess, Lux, and even Abel were all patted down before one of the men opened the door of the closet and shoved them into the room. Abel began crying again as the door closed behind the men and they were left in darkness.

It wasn't a huge closet, but it was big enough that they could all sit down. Before Lux sat, she waved her arms around, her wrists still tied together, trying to find the cord to the lone light bulb in the room. She finally felt her fingers brush past it and gripped it, pulling down and giving them light. Jess looked solemnly across at her as Lux held her wrists out and Jess reached out, struggling to untie the knot. Once Lux's wrists were free she did the same for Jess and they sat down. Abel immediately climbed into Lux's lap and she tried to comfort him.

"It's okay Abel," Lux said, "It's just a game. They're just playing a game with your daddy, that's all." Abel's cries began to recede and he looked up at Lux.

"A game?" he asked. Lux nodded.

"That's right," she said, and Jess could hear her forcing strength into her voice, "You like games, right?" Abel nodded, his face red and blotchy from crying, but he began to smile.

"Are we going to win?" he asked. Lux nodded, smiling at him.

"Definitely," she said. Abel rested his head on Lux's chest, eventually falling asleep. Lux looked down at him, at how angelic he looked, before looking back at Jess.

"What is going on?" Jess whispered. Lux shrugged, shaking her head.

"It's gotta be Zobelle," she said quietly, her eyes looking down at the crack underneath the door where she saw a shadow moving, "We've got a guard." Jess sighed, leaning back against the wall as a tear trickled down her cheek.

"It's gonna be okay, Jess," Lux whispered, "We'll get out of here." Jess shook her head, wishing she could believe it.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax pulled into the TM lot, frustrated that once again every lead that turned up on Zobelle had turned out to be shit. He hauled himself on top of the picnic tables, reaching into his pocket to grab his prepay and call Jess when the sound of sirens made him glance up. He sighed, watching as Roosevelt peeled into the TM lot and swung himself out of his car. Jax stood, walking towards him, shaking his head.

"Whatever it is, we didn't do it," Jax said jokingly, expecting to get at least a small smile from Roosevelt, but the Sherriff was all seriousness today.

"Aw shit, what now?" Jax asked, shaking his head.

"Jax…" Roosevelt started and at the look on his face Jax felt panic hit him like a punch in the gut. It was Jess. He knew it. And she was with Abel. And Lux.

"What?" Jax asked quickly, "What happened? What is it?" Roosevelt's siren seemed to have attracted the rest of the guys that were in the clubhouse and Jax briefly registered Opie, Juice, Chibs, Happy, and Tig walking outside.

"About an hour ago, 4 masked men pulled up to the Charming City Park in a van," he said and Jax's heart sunk as his face contorted in pain. He shook his head.

"No…" he said.

"Eric Miles was murdered," Roosevelt explained and Jax felt his heart stop as he waited for Roosevelt to continue, "Just before two young women and a toddler were reported to have been kidnapped and taken into the van."

"No!" Jax screamed, running his hands through his hair as he double over. He was supposed to have been there. He should have been there. He was too busy, off chasing Zobelle, and Zobelle snatched them, right from underneath him. His sister. His kid, kidnapped for the third fucking time in his short life. And his Old Lady.

"Any leads?" Chibs finally asked, realizing Jax needed a few minutes to get himself together before he could be of any use. Roosevelt shook his head.

"The van was unmarked," he said, "They were all wearing masks."

"It was Ethan Zobelle," Opie said. Roosevelt raised his eyebrows.

"And what gives you that idea?" he asked.

"He's back in town. We just don't know where," Opie replied, "He told us it was him that shot Jess. This is him again." Roosevelt stared at him, his eyes narrowed thoughtfully, before he nodded.

"I'll get a team over here in case he makes contact with you. The feds have been alerted and an APB put out on the van, but as there's not much of a description to go on they've already had about 200 calls come in that they're trying to track down. Not sure how much good that'll do," Roosevelt said. Jax nodded, running his hands through his hair in frustration as he tried to figure out any way to find them besides sitting around and waiting for them to make contact. But they'd been spending months tracking down leads on Zobelle and so far not a single one had turned into anything.

If any of them were hurt, if any of them were killed, it would be Jax's fault. And he couldn't bear it.

Half an hour later, their clubhouse had been transformed into a make-shift police station and though part of Jax hated their sanctuary being tainted by the same fuckers who had once destroyed it, he was grateful for their help.

His prepay rang and Jax glanced down at it, showing it to Roosevelt as the Sherriff quickly jotted down the number and nodded silently to Jax before he answered.

"Yeah?" Jax said, putting the phone on speaker.

"Jackson Teller," Zobelle's confident voice rang out.

"You fucking piece of shit!" Jax screamed into the phone, much to the dismay of all the cops sitting around the room.

"Tsk Tsk Teller," Zobelle said, "Is that anyway to talk to the man who literally has your balls in a vice grip?" Jax felt his face twisting in rage as he resisted the urge to punch whoever was nearest to him.

"What the fuck do you want from me!?" Jax yelled, "Niners have been out! What the fuck do you want!?"

"Yeah, it was never really about the blacks," Zobelle said, "No… this is about Polly." Jax froze. Polly fucking Zobelle. His crazy, manipulative daughter whom Jax's crazy mother had killed just before Abel was kidnapped by the Irish.

"This is about Polly?" Jax asked, his heart sinking. Revenge was not good. Revenge meant there was no talking him down, no negotiating until he could get them back. Revenge meant Zobelle was out for blood.

"You have one hour," Zobelle told him.

"One hour for what?" Jax asked. That sounded like a ransom demand, "You want money?"

"No," Zobelle responded simply, "I want you to think about which one I'm going to kill. Your sister, your child, or your old lady. If you don't let me know in one hour which one you want dead, I will kill them all."

The phone clicked shut and Jax stared at it before collapsing on the couch, his head in his hands, and he cried. It was an obviously impossible decision, and Jax could see no way to get them all out alive.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jess stared open mouthed at Zobelle as he clicked the phone shut, smiling back at Jess before he closed the closet door once again and she heard his footsteps echoing further and further away. She knew there was no way Jax would ever be able to make that decision, and she had no doubt that Zobelle was serious about his threat. She looked over at Lux, the hopelessness of the situation dawning on her.

"It'll all be okay," Lux said, "He's not really going to kill one of us."

"He already killed Miles," Jess said in defeat.

"Yeah, but we've got a whole hour. They'll figure out where we are and come get us," Lux said, her tone optimistic but it was clear to both of them she didn't believe a word she was saying.

"We drove for over an hour just getting here," Jess reminded her, "Even if they knew exactly where we are right now, which I doubt, they'd never make it in the time limit." Jess leaned back against the wall, looking across at Lux and looking down at Abel. It was obvious what the right choice should be. Jax could never ask for his son or his sister to be killed. They were his family. And if he couldn't tell Zobelle it should be Jess, they would all die. Even if he could make the decision, she didn't want him to have to live with it.

Tears poured down her cheeks as she thought about Jax. She'd always thought there'd be more time. And she'd never told him she loved him. She'd known it for weeks, ever since the day she'd made the decision to stay in Charming and rebuild Cara Cara, she'd known she'd been in love with him. But she'd never told him and it was too late now. And she had promised Luann she wouldn't waste any of their time together. She had wasted it all.

"Lux," Jess said, her voice croaked. Lux was sitting huddled by the wall, her knees pulled up to her chest and her head tucked into her knees. She glanced up when Jess said her name.

"Yeah?" she asked. Jess felt the tears pour faster now, felt her chest close as she struggled to breathe.

"If you make it out of here and I don't…" Jess started.

"No Jess, shut up. We're all getting out of here," Lux said firmly. Jess shook her head.

"Okay, but if I don't… tell Jax I love him," she said.

"Tell him yourself when we get out of here!" Lux insisted, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks. Jess shook her head.

"I've never told him. He doesn't know. I need to know that you'll tell him. I need to know that he'll know that I loved him. So much," Jess said, trying to stop herself from sobbing. Lux continued shaking her head, "Please! Lux! Promise me you'll tell him!" A sob escaped Lux's lips and she nodded.

"I promise," she said, "I'll tell him. I promise." Jess nodded, stroking Abel's back softly as he gazed up at her. She kissed him lightly on the forehead before setting him down beside her so she could crawl over to Lux. She wrapped her arms around her friend, holding her tightly as tears streamed down her cheeks.

"And I love you," Jess whispered, "You're my sister." Lux nodded, gripping Jess tightly.

"I love you, too," Lux said, her voice shaking, before Jess tore herself from Lux's grasp and stood up, knocking on the door.

"What are you doing?" Lux hissed. Jess shook her head, her entire body heaving in silent sobs, as the door opened and one of the men peered in at her.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"I want to talk to Zobelle," Jess said, wiping her eyes quickly. She wanted to do her best to not let Zobelle see her upset. If she was going to do this, she did not want to give him that satisfaction.

Zobelle walked up a minute later, smiling as if this were the greatest day of his life.

"You wanted to see me?" he said cheerfully and Jess nodded.

"Jax will never be able to make that decision," Jess told him. Zobelle shrugged disinterestedly.

"It makes no difference to me if I kill one of you or all three of you," he replied.

"I'm making the decision for him," Jess said, surprised at the bravado in her voice. It was all false. She had never felt more scared in her life, "It should be me. Let them go. Kill… me."

"No!" Lux shouted from behind her, jumping to her feet, but both Zobelle and Jess ignored her. Jess couldn't bear to turn around and look at her. Zobelle raised his eyebrows.

"Are you sure about that?" he asked, "Jax might not choose you. You might live." Jess shook her head, begging the tears not to fall.

"He's not going to decide anything at all. I won't let him. _I've _decided. It's me," Jess said firmly, trying to keep the sound of desperation out of her voice.

"Jess, no…" Lux whispered.

"My daughter is dead because of him," Zobelle said, speaking over Lux, his voice now full of malice and hate, "So I want you to be well aware of what you're getting yourself into with this _noble sacrifice_. Whoever it is, I want Jax to know how much they suffered before they died. I want him to spend the rest of his life suffering like I am."

Jess felt all of her resolve leave her body, leaving behind a cold chill in its wake, as she slowly nodded. She suddenly felt jealous of Miles. His death had been so quick. Probably painless. He hadn't seen it coming. Jess would see it coming. She would feel it. Zobelle smiled, nodding as he grabbed Jess and pulled her out of the closet.

"JESS!" Lux shrieked, lunging towards them as Zobelle slammed the door in her face. Jess could hear her banging her fists against the door as Abel began crying again.

"JESS! NO!" she shouted, and Jess could hear her sobbing through her words. But Jess had no words left as Zobelle lead her to the back of the warehouse and outside. He tied her up to a chair that had been placed behind the warehouse, not bothering to gag her mouth. Clearly he wanted to hear her scream. Jess braced herself, thankful that at least if she had to die, it was going to be for saving people she truly loved. Her death would mean something.

Two other men were standing around them, watching her, as Zobelle reached for his phone and dialed.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

Jax paced the width of the clubhouse, wanting to punch every cop and fed in the face. They couldn't get a trace on Zobelle's phone. They had no idea where the girls and Abel were. And Jax now had 30 minutes before he was supposed to pick one of them to die. How was he supposed to make that decision? How could he possibly choose one of them and then live with the consequences? But if he didn't… Jax had no doubt that Zobelle would be a man of his word. He wouldn't think twice about killing them all. Hell, he might kill them all even if Jax did choose.

He looked around the room. Tig looked like a wreck, sitting on the bar and drinking straight out of a bottle of Jack. He had been begging Jax for the last half hour to not choose Lux. Of course Jax wouldn't choose Lux. But then if not Lux… who? But then if he didn't choose…

Gemma was sitting calmly at a table, her eyes scanning the room thoughtfully, but Jax knew that inside she was a mess. If she was home alone right now, she'd be crying and getting as high and drunk as she could. But she wasn't home alone and even in a time like this, Gemma kept up appearances. Gemma always stayed strong when there were eyes around.

The rest of the boys were either huddled around Juice, who was busy on his computer running searches on Zobelle, or on the phone with the Mayans, the Nords… anyone who might know where Zobelle might be. All leads they'd tried before of course, but desperate times…

Jax's phone rang and his grabbed it quickly, looking at the phone displayed on the front. Roosevelt was watching him and Jax looked up at him.

"It's him," Jax said, checking his watch again to make sure he had the right time. He wasn't supposed to be getting this call for another 30 minutes. Roosevelt nodded as Jax flipped the phone open and put it on speaker phone once again.

"Congratulations, Jax," Zobelle's voice rang out around the clubhouse, "You are no longer the master of their fate."

"What are you talking about?" Jax asked, attempting to keep the panic out of his voice. He saw Tig's head jerk up, watching and listening carefully.

"Your choice has been made for you. Jessica here has decided that she should be the one, and so it is," Zobelle said.

"What?" Jax whispered, trembling as Zobelle's words sunk in and hating Tig a little more for the visible relief he allowed himself to show, "No. No. You gave me an hour!"

"Yes, but that was before Jessica stepped up and decided to bite the bullet, pun intended," Zobelle said, laughing at his little joke. Jax seethed, the hairs on his body standing on end as he heard her screaming from the other end of the phone.

"What are you doing to her?!" Jax yelled, enraged at the helplessness that he felt. That Jess was going to die and there was nothing he could do about it.

And then a gunshot rang out, clear as crystal, and the line went dead. Jax stared at the phone for a second before he roared in grief, clutching it in his hand. He turned to the wall closest to him, banging his fist as hard as he could against it over and over again, relishing in the pain searing his hand, until he felt Opie grab him from behind, tearing him away from the wall and to the couch. He slumped down onto it, unable to focus on anything other than the gunshot he had heard through the phone.

She was dead and there wasn't a single part of that that wasn't his fault. She had stayed in Charming for him. She had sacrificed herself for him and his family. He had loved her, and he had never told her. And now she would never know.

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_**Author's note: **_**Don't hate us! But even if you do, let us know what you think! :) **


	29. Chapter 29

_**Author's Note: **_**So we really didn't intend to update today but holy crap 17 reviews! I just couldn't leave you guys hanging any more! Thank you all so so so much for your awesome words! Of course the last chapter was not the end, so without further ado (or keeping you in suspense any longer) I will let you get to it! **

* * *

Jax sat slumped on the floor leaning against the couch in the clubhouse, a cigarette in his hand as tears poured down his cheeks. There was a flurry of activity around him but Jax couldn't focus on any of it. Jess was dead. Nothing else mattered. And every bit of it had been his fault. He didn't know how much time had passed since that phone call, and he didn't care. All he wanted was a chance to do the day over again. To go to the park with Jess and Lux and Abel and stop all of this from happening.

"You don't know that she's dead," Opie said, sitting on the couch next to where Jax's head was resting. Jax barely looked at him. He knew. He knew because every fiber of his body that had been holding onto hope was now dead.

"Jax, even if it's true, Lux and Abel are still alive," Opie told him, "We've still got to try to get them back." A tiny part of Jax's heart flared at Opie's words. Opie was right. Lux and Abel were still alive. And if Jax couldn't help Jess, he sure as hell was going to make sure nothing happened to his sister or his son. He nodded, stabbing his cigarette out in an ash tray as he stood up. Roosevelt hurried over to him, waving a fax in the air.

"We just got a hit from DEA," he said, "They think Zobelle's been running heroin out of a warehouse in some woods out near Sausalito. They've tried to bust it a couple of times but every time the place has been swept clean before they get there. It's perfect – isolated and the right distance away to work with the time frame." Jax nodded, eager to have something to do besides wait around, and he moved to walk out the door until Roosevelt held up his hand.

"You're not going, Jax," he said, "Local authorities have been notified and are on their way."

"You're out of your GODDAMN mind if you think I'm not going!" Jax yelled, reaching to rip the paper with the address on it out of Roosevelt's hands. But just as he reached for it his phone rang. He glanced down to see Zobelle's number lit across the screen. He flipped it open.

"You're a dead man you fucking cocksucker!" Jax screamed into the phone.

"Way ahead of you big bro," Lux's voice sounded through the phone and Jax stared at it in disbelief, "And is that any way to talk to a lady?"

"Lux?" Jax asked meekly, hardly daring to allow himself to believe that it was her. He quickly put the phone on speaker as a hush fell across the entire room, everyone staring at Jax in disbelief and listening intently to the conversation.

"Yeah," she said, "We're all okay. We took the van."

"You're _all _okay?" Jax said, "Jess? Jess is okay?"

"Yeah, she's okay," Lux said, "I mean, she's not _perfect_, but she'll be okay. She's sleeping right now." Jax was having difficulty processing what Lux was telling him.

"What?" Jax asked, staring wildly around the room as everyone stared back at him, their mouths open in shock, "What happened?"

"Well I knew you couldn't get here in time, so I had to improvise," Lux said as she went into the story.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

ONE HOUR EARLIER

Lux stood at the door, her fists growing weary as she finally gave up banging them on the door and she turned around, sliding down the door until she hit the floor. She gazed across the small space at Abel, huddled in the corner, staring at her with wide eyes.

"It's going to be okay, little man," she said, her eyes searching the room for some source of inspiration, some way out of this mess, some way to save Jess from her incredibly stupid and incredibly brave sacrifice. She stood, walking around the room, her hands trailing along the brick wall on the far side of the room until she felt a cracked brick. She dug her fingernails into the mortar surrounding the brick that began to crumble until part of the brick came loose and she held it in her hand, smiling grimly.

"This'll work," she said. She looked down at Abel. Was she risking both of their lives by attempting an escape and trying to save Jess? Something told her that if Zobelle killed Jess, his word to Jax wouldn't stop him from killing the rest of them. Her best bet was to do whatever she could to get out of there. She squatted down next to Abel, who peered up at her.

"You want to help me and Jess?" Lux asked. Abel nodded eagerly, "Okay. We're going to play a game and if you win, I'll give you a whole dollar." Abel's eyes widened as he grinned up at her.

"What game?" Abel asked.

"Me and you are on a team. The guys outside are on the other team. We have to beat them and then we'll win the game," Lux said. She had Abel's complete attention. He loved winning games and he loved dollars even more, "When I say go, I want you to start screaming and crying as loud as you can. Can you do that?" Abel nodded again and Lux smiled at him, peering across the room at the door, "Okay good. And then when the guard comes in I want you to close your eyes really tightly until I tell you to open them again, okay? If you don't keep your eyes closed, we'll lose the game," Again Abel nodded, "Okay… go!"

Immediately Abel started screaming and Lux winced. The boy could follow directions. She waited and less than a minute later, the guard rapped angrily on the door.

"Shut the kid up or I'll do for it for you!" he called through the door.

"He won't stop!" Lux shouted back, forcing all the desperation she could muster into her voice, "I think he's dehydrated. He needs some water and he'll quiet down!"

She shook her head at the idiots Zobelle had hired as she heard his footsteps retreating. Good help must really be hard to find. She stood by the door, waiting for the guard to enter, grasping the brick firmly in her hand and praying that he was stupid enough to come in alone. Men always underestimated her. Didn't they realize SAMCRO was in her blood?

"Close your eyes Abel," Lux reminded him as Abel continued wailing. He did as instructed, squeezing his eyelids shut as tight as he could and Lux nodded. She did not want her 4 year old nephew to witness what was about to happen.

The guard did as she hoped, striding alone into the room with a glass of water in his hands as he shut the door behind him. His back was now towards Lux and before he could look around for her, she slammed the brick as hard as she could into his skull. He went down quickly but she didn't stop hitting him until she was absolutely positive he was dead. Lux looked up at Abel, relieved to see he was still sitting there, screaming, with his eyes squeezed shut.

"Don't open your eyes," she said, as she quickly grabbed the guard's gun from his holster, "But you can stop screaming." Abel immediately fell silent.

"Did we win yet?" Abel asked.

"Almost," Lux responded as she searched the rest of the guard's body for anything she could use as a weapon. She knew she didn't have much time before someone would be in to check on them. He had a large knife hanging off his belt, similar to the ones the club wore. That would be helpful. She wanted to attract the least amount of attention for as long as possible, and guns weren't the best for that. She grabbed the knife, sliding it through her belt loop as she heard footsteps walking towards the door.

"Keep your eyes closed, Abel," Lux said softly, checking to make sure he was obeying her orders. She hid behind the door once more as another guard rapped on the door.

"Hey! Jay! You in there?" she heard him call. She heard the door click and begin to open and she grasped the knife tightly in her fist, prepared to strike. The guard walked in, the door closing behind him and immediately Lux pounced, driving it into his back. The guard howled and Lux wrenched the knife out of his back, bringing it to his neck and slicing it to silence him. Blood spurted everywhere and Lux grimaced as the guard toppled on top of the other one.

Lux took a moment to catch her breath. She reached down and grabbed the second guard's gun, checking the chambers in both guns and seeing they were both fully loaded. That would be helpful. She dug her hands through both guards' pockets. She was pretty sure one of them had been driving the van and smiled in satisfaction as her fingers wrapped around the keys. She pulled them out, sticking them in her pocket.

She ran down the list of who was left. Two down, which meant at least 3 more plus Zobelle were left. There was the guard at the front door and Zobelle was with Jess. She assumed he must have at least one other guy with him as she knew Zobelle didn't like to do the dirty work himself. She needed to get to him soon. Her only consolation was that he'd threatened to torture Jess for a while before he killed her, and that wasn't such a great consolation. She was confident Jess was still alive, though. And that left one man unaccounted for. He could be anywhere; Lux couldn't be sure.

She turned back to look at Abel, still sitting with his eyes closed tight next to two dead bodies pouring blood. She didn't want to leave him in here with them, but she didn't have much choice. He'd be safest staying put and she could come get him when she got back. She sighed, stepping over the bodies to get to Abel and blocked them from his view.

"We're going to win," Lux told him, "But we've still gotta play the game."

"Can I open my eyes now?" Abel asked softly.

"Turn around and face the wall," Lux said, "Then you can open your eyes." Abel nodded, scooting around to face the wall and finally opened his eyes.

"I'm going to go get Jess," Lux said, "We win when I get her back, but if you turn around, we'll lose the game, okay?" Abel nodded, trailing his fingers along the brick in the wall in front of him. Lux leaned down to kiss the top of his head as she turned to step back over the bodies. She grasped the door handle, opening it slowly as she peered outside. The warehouse was empty. Wherever the 5th man was, he was not inside.

She stepped out of the room, closing the door quietly behind her. First things first was to get rid of the guard at the door. She wasn't sure how to do that as she wasn't sure of his exact position. She could shoot straight through the door, but that would give away her position if she didn't hit him right away and the noise would attract unwanted attention from wherever Zobelle and the other two men were. If she opened the door, she could find herself face to face with an armed asshole.

She walked to the door, pressing her ear against it to see if she could hear anything that would give away the guard's position, but she couldn't. She sighed, wracking her brain for what to do, desperate to get to Jess before it was too late; desperate to get all of them the hell out of there.

She finally decided the best she could hope for was the element of surprise. He would not be expecting her to have been able to get past both of the other men. He would have his guard down. She knew he had a shot gun, not a hand gun like the other guards, and that would help her in close proximity. She stood back, the large knife, stained with blood, held tightly in her hand as she wrenched the door open and stabbed openly as fast as she could. She heard the guard yelp in surprise and felt the knife connect, but it only sliced him. She hadn't been able to stab. He held the shot gun out and Lux ran past it, the knife clutched in her hand as she rammed into him, sinking the knife into his belly. She watched as he slowly slid to his knees staring up at her in shock as his finger pulled the trigger of the shot gun desperately. But he missed by a long shot and Lux yanked the knife out before stabbing him again until she was sure that he, too, was dead.

Lux shuddered as she stepped over his body, eyeing the van sitting in the driveway. That was their way out. She just needed to find Jess. She had no idea where Zobelle had taken her. But then she heard Jess screaming and it sounded as if it was coming from behind the warehouse. Lux ran as quickly as she dared down the side of the warehouse, trying not to make too much noise, until she reached the end of the wall. She took a deep breath, peering around the edge to see Jess bound to a chair, Zobelle standing over her and two men standing on either side.

Lux smiled in relief. Jess was still alive, and Lux had found the extra man. She was fairly confident there were no others around. She couldn't be sure, but it was all the information she had and she had to work with it. She had no other choice. She slid the knife back through her belt loop until it was hanging by the hilt and took one of the guns in her hand, holding it out steady. She tried to find a good shot, but she couldn't. She needed to distract them. Her best bet was to get them to run towards her and she could shoot them off then, if they didn't shoot her or Jess first. No, she needed to get one down right away. She could take only take on one at a time and she knew Zobelle would be a shitty shot so he didn't count. He depended on his men for everything like that. If she could get one of them down, she'd only have to take care of the other one and then go after Zobelle.

She waited for her moment. Waited for one of them to step far enough away from Jess that she could get him without risking hitting Jess. It finally happened. One of them stepped a few paces away as the other raised a knife in his hand, about to bring it down into Jess's thigh while Zobelle stood by, smiling in satisfaction. Lux took a deep, calming breath, suddenly thankful to all those shooting lessons her dad and brother had insisted she take. She raised the gun, waited until her arm was steady, and pulled the trigger, hitting her target dead on with one shot.

He went down quickly as Zobelle and the other guard looked wildly around and spotted Lux peering around the corner of the warehouse. The guard raised his gun, firing off several rounds and Lux ducked behind the warehouse, waiting for him to either stop firing so she could take a shot or run out of bullets and have to reload so she'd have a moment.

His firing ceased and Lux reached her arm around, too afraid to stick her head out since she hadn't heard his gun click and knew he must have bullets left, and fired several times until the gun in her hand clicked. She cursed throwing it down and reached for the other gun, smiling as the guard stopped firing and she could hear him running towards her. He had heard that she was out of bullets. He didn't know she had a second gun.

She jumped out from behind the wall, firing wildly at the guard who stared at her, stunned, clutching his chest. His gun fell slowly out of his hand, landing with a thud in the ground, before he too collapsed onto the grass, blood slowing pouring out of his body. Lux looked up to see Zobelle staring murderously at her before running off in the opposite direction. Lux ran to Jess, stopping next to her.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"I'm fine!" Jess yelled, "Go get him!" Lux didn't need to be told twice. She took off running into the trees that Zobelle had disappeared through, the gun held in front of her as she used it to direct her movement. There was no sign of him. She stopped, standing still in the woods, listening carefully to try to hear any sound that might lead her to Zobelle, but he had disappeared. Frustration welled up in Lux, but she knew she had to get back to Jess, who was unarmed and still tied to that chair. Zobelle would be found again. She'd make sure of it.

She turned and ran back in the direction of Jess, spotting a cell phone on the ground on the way. It must have fallen out of Zobelle's pocket when he ran off. She picked it up quickly before running off to Jess. She quickly used the knife to cut her binds and Jess stood from the chair, wincing in pain.

"Did you get him?" Jess asked. Lux paused for a split second looking at Jess, at how banged up and bruised she was, at the terror in her eyes, and made a decision she hoped she wouldn't regret.

"Yeah, I got him," she said, "It's over." The visible relief on Jess's face made the lie taste a little better in Lux's mouth.

"Good," Jess said, "Where's Abel?"

"Still in the closet," Lux said, "The van is still parked out front. We can use it to get out." Jess nodded and began to try to walk, but she was limping.

"Are you okay?" Lux asked. Jess nodded, holding her breath in pain.

"I'll be fine, it's just my leg," she said, "And my side hurts." Lux nodded, wrapping Jess's arm around her shoulder as she helped her walk to the back door of the warehouse. They hobbled inside, walking as quickly as they could to the closet and Lux opened the door, grimacing at the sight of the two dead bodies but happy to see Abel still sitting facing the wall. She let go of Jess, who braced herself on the wall next to the door, as Lux walked inside to get Abel.

"Ready to go, little man?" Lux asked and Abel nodded.

"Did we win?" he asked as Lux picked up him, shielding his eyes from the dead bodies he'd been trapped in the room with. She prayed he hadn't turned around while she'd been out.

"Yeah, we won," Lux said, squeezing him tightly.

"Where's my dollar!?" Abel asked happily as Lux set him down outside of the room, closing the door behind her.

"Uh, you're dad'll pay up," Lux said, grinning at Abel as she helped Jess out to the van. They climbed in quickly and Lux grabbed the keys she had taken off Zobelle's man and hurriedly shoved them in the ignition. The van started easily and she peeled away from the warehouse and back down the only road leading away from it, praying there were no other obstacles in their path.

By the time they got to a major road, Jess had fallen asleep. Lux finally dug Zobelle's phone out and quickly dialed Jax's number, knowing he must be sick with worry.

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"Zobelle's still out there Jax," Lux said, finishing her story to Jax as she glanced sidelong at Jess to make sure she was still sleeping, "I told Jess he was dead, but he's not."

"We'll find him," Jax assured her, glancing at Roosevelt who turned to the feds who in turn made several calls to the Sausalito PD. A man alone in the woods with no transportation and no friends left couldn't be that hard to find, "Goddammit, Lux, remind me to never get on your bad side. When'd you become a badass?"

"Hey, I'm no damsel in distress," Lux said, "Tell Tig I'm okay."

"He's here, he knows," Jax said, looking across the room at Tig, whose eyes were bright and wet.

"Okay, good. I'm taking Jess to the nearest hospital. I don't even know where the hell we are," Lux said.

"Sausalito, I think. I'm gonna pass you to Roosevelt. You can tell him what's around you and he'll figure out where you are and give you directions to the hospital," Jax said.

"Okay," Lux said, "And hey, Jax?"

"Yeah?" Jax asked, pausing before passing the phone into Roosevelt's waiting hand.

"I love you, okay?" she said. Jax smiled.

"Yeah I love you too, you little shit," he said. She laughed and Jax handed Roosevelt the phone, sinking onto the couch in relief instead of despair this time. Jess was alive. He hadn't gotten her killed. They were all alive. They were all _okay. _Zobelle would be caught and it would all be over. And it had been _Lux_ that had saved the day. Who would have thought?

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Roosevelt had directed Lux to Marin General Hospital in Greenbrae, which was nearly two hours from Charming. Jax had raced to his bike as soon as Roosevelt had figured out which hospital they should go to, followed by Tig and most of the others, Gemma racing behind them in her Caddy.

He finally pulled into the parking lot of the hospital, glancing at the front doors to see Lux waiting outside for them, Abel on her hip. His heart soared at the sight of them and he parked quickly, rushing up to his sister and his son. Lux smiled at Jax as Abel held his arms out towards him and Lux handed Abel over.

"You owe him a dollar," Lux said, winking at Abel before running off to Tig, jumping into his arms. He held her tightly, swinging her around and she laughed until he finally set her down. Gemma walked up to her, clutching her tightly in her arms and Lux gripped her mother tightly, smiling. Everyone finally walked up to join Jax at the hospital entrance and he looked at Lux.

"Where's Jess?" he asked.

"Room 1410," Lux replied, "She's okay. They just want to watch for signs of concussion and they had to stitch up part of her leg, but… but she's okay." Lux's voice was full of disbelief as she said it, shaking her head. Jax handed Abel to Gemma as he embraced his sister again, holding her tightly.

"You saved everyone," he whispered in her ear, "Took on 5 fully grown men all by yourself."

"It was an adrenaline rush," Lux said dismissively, "I was like superman." Jax laughed, letting her go as they all walked down the hall towards Jess's room.

"I only wish I could've gotten Zobelle, too," Lux said in frustration and Jax nodded.

"You did enough," Jax told her, "We'll get him. I promise." Lux nodded as they stopped in front of Jess's room and Jax walked inside alone to see her sitting up in bed, flipping through some channels on the TV. She turned when she heard him walk in and stared at him for a moment before bursting into tears. Jax rushed to her side, holding her tightly against him as she clutched him in her arms until she calmed down.

"I never thought I'd see you again," she said weakly, looking up at him. He cupped her face in his hand, never wanting to let go, and she wrapped her fingers around his wrist.

"I can't believe you did what you did," Jax said, staring at her in awe. She had tried to sacrifice her life for him, for his family, and he couldn't even begin to process the meaning behind that action. Jess shook her head.

"It wasn't a decision you could have made," Jess said, "I had to do it."

"Never do anything like that again," Jax said, holding the back of her head tightly as he gazed down at her. He kissed her gently on the lips, resting his forehead against hers, "I… I thought you were dead. I was a wreck."

"I did it because I love you," Jess said quietly. He lifted his head from hers, staring down at her, the words echoing around the room.

"God, I love you, too," Jax murmured, kissing her once more. The gentle kisses were gone and Jess kissed him back fiercely, clutching the back of his head, relishing in the feeling of being alive and being in love.

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Jax got the call the next day. He glanced down at the caller ID before looking back at Jess, lying asleep on her hospital bed, and stepped out into the hall to take the call.

"Tell me you have good news," he said.

"The best," LeRoy's voice rang out from the other end, "My guy at Oakland PD just gave the word. Transfer to Stockton is happening in the morning."

Jax's lip twitched in grim satisfaction. An enormous sweep of the area the day before had resulted in Zobelle's capture by Sausalito PD. He was untouchable there; they had no contacts within that department. Leaving Zobelle with them would mean he'd make bail and await trial. His trial would be set for months from now and by the time it came around, Zobelle would be long gone. Leave Zobelle with them was not an option.

Luckily, Sausalito happened to be right on the edge of Oakland and LeRoy had managed to come through. One of the cops on his pay roll had reached out to Sausalito PD, pulled in a few favors, and Zobelle would be at Stockton in the morning.

Jax wished with everything in his body that it could be him to deal the final blow to Zobelle, but if it couldn't be him, he was more than happy to let Otto carry out the deed.

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The blade was slipped to Otto on the yard midafternoon. He grasped it in his hand, giving the guard only the slightest of nods before he slipped it into his pocket. It would happen at chow time that night. He'd been watching Zobelle carefully for the past few days. He knew the fucker would make bail if it didn't happen soon, and the Sons could only pull so many strings to hold off his hearing. It had to be tonight.

He went back to his cell after time in the yard. If he was caught, and he would be caught, this would mean solitary confinement for a while, and possibly the death sentence. But his life was already over, anyway. He'd already lost Luann because of Zobelle, and then he had tried to take away the only other person that made his life worth living – his daughter. The daughter that that bitch had kept from him for 26 years and Zobelle had nearly killed her.

No, Zobelle had to die, no matter the consequences to himself. And it had to be painful. He wanted to see the fear in his eyes, wanted to watch the life drain out of him. Then Luann would be avenged and Jess would never have to worry about Zobelle again.

He sat patiently at chow time, surrounded by the other members of the Big House crew, SOA Stockston. He watched Zobelle's back from across the room. Zobelle knew who he was. He had known his life was over the second his transfer to Stockton had happened. This would come as no surprise to him.

Chow time ended and the prisoners began to rise from their tables, talking in clusters. Zobelle was still alone. He hadn't had time to make any friends or allies yet. Otto rose and walked toward Zobelle, quickly enough to get to him before Zobelle left the mess hall, but not quick enough to raise any alerts with the guards in the room.

He came up behind him, the blade clutched in his hand, and leaned in to his ear from behind.

"Ethan Zobelle?" he said, his voice gravelly and dangerous. Zobelle started in surprise, trying to hurry off but Otto brought his hand up quickly, the blade wrapped in his fist, before crushing it into the side of Zobelle's throat. Zobelle's hands clutched at his neck as blood poured out, turning to look at Otto with wide eyes. He clutched at the blade, ripping it out of his throat as he choked on his own blood. Blood poured even more furiously from the now open wound.

If Otto walked away right now, there was enough of a crowd that it was possible they wouldn't know it was him. But that would take all the satisfaction out of watching him die away. Zobelle collapsed to his knees, struggling to breathe as he gazed up at Otto.

"That was for my _wife_," he sneered, "And my daughter."

The guards pounced on him just as Zobelle toppled over, the life drained out of him as the blood pooled around his body. Otto just grinned as the guards grabbed his arms, dragging him away as he laughed. No one could pinpoint the exact moment his laughter turned to sobs from what he had lost.

* * *

**Sorry for leaving you hanging! or should I say... sorry I'm not sorry? :) haha But no of course we didn't kill off Jess, we've still got lots of story to tell where she is concerned. **

**We hope you liked this chapter! It went through several rewrites and there was a lot of discussion about how Zobelle would finally meet his end (in the original story, it was Lux that killed him), then we wanted it to be Jax but just couldn't really think of a reasonably realistic way that Jax would have been able to find him when the police were all over it. So this way seemed like the most satisfying option while still keeping things organic and avoiding a "deus ex machina" situation.**

**Which is all just my long winded way of saying... Please review and let us know what you thought! :) **


	30. Chapter 30

_**Author's Note: **_**Not sure if 'sorry' is going to cut it here, but we really are! Life got in the way - lost my job, had to move cities, had to find a new job - and I lost a lot of motivation to write. I didn't want to just bang something out and post it just for the sake of posting because I knew if I did that the story would suffer, so I've been waiting until I found some motivation. **

**Now since I've already made y'all wait over a month to read this chapter, I'll let you get to it: **

* * *

Jess stood in the clubhouse, surrounded by a somber crowd dressed in black as she stared at the casket in front of her, on top of which was draped Mile's cut. She couldn't tear her eyes away from it, even when Jax walked up and stood next to her. Miles had died trying to protect her. How could she ever reconcile that?

"It's not your fault," Jax said quietly, reading Jess's thoughts. She turned to look at him, tears glistening in her eyes.

"In what possible way is this not my fault?" she asked him. Jax shook his head, wrapping his arms around her.

"Zobelle killed Miles," he replied, "And I'm the one who sent him with you instead of going myself. So take your pick on who to blame, but it's not you." Jess's lip trembled as she shook her head, wrapping her arms around his waist as she leaned her head against his chest.

"But if you had gone then you might be dead," she whispered, "And that would have killed me."

"Yeah, I know the feeling," he replied quietly. They stood in silence for several minutes until Jess finally spoke again.

"How's Abel doing?" Jess asked. Jax shrugged.

"He still thinks the whole thing was a game," he said, "Lux did good. He should be fine." Jess nodded as Jax kissed her lightly on the top of the head before walking towards the casket, placing his hand upon it as he looked down at Miles' cut, shaking his head. This shouldn't have happened.

As relieved as he was that Zobelle was finally dead, he knew it would be a long time before the events of that day would really be behind any of them.

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As the months passed, Jess threw herself completely into preparing for Cara Cara's grand opening. Construction was coming along right on time thanks to the beautiful California weather and there was still so much to do before they opened. Jess was thankful for the work and the distraction. It allowed her to live momentarily in a world where she had never been kidnapped; where Lux hadn't had to kill six people to save their lives. She couldn't deal with the emotions surrounding that day, and so she ignored them.

The most important item on her agenda was hiring employees. She'd put an ad out in the Charming Gazette and Lux had been spreading the word around Georgie's that any of the girls who had gone there from Cara Cara would be welcome back for the opening. Rob the bartender had already agreed to resume his post and she'd lined up several interviews for waitresses and dancers, but she was still missing her top dancers from Cara Cara.

Jess walked up the stairs to her apartment, tired after a long day working with an interior designer ordering furniture, dishes, signs, and artwork. She opened the door to the apartment, walking in to see Lux walking out of her room dressed for work. They hadn't spent a whole lot of time together since the kidnapping, mostly because every time Jess saw her all she could think about was being trapped in that closet with her, knowing she was going to die. Either Lux was as good as Jess at hiding and ignoring her feelings, or the ordeal hadn't affected her as much. Either way, Jess was finding it hard to be around her.

"Oh, hey!" Lux said, smiling as Jess closed the door behind her, "How'd it go with the designer?"

"Fine," Jess said, "I've been meaning to ask you, Ima and Lyla aren't working at Georgie's now, are they?" Lux shook her head.

"Nah, I don't know where they ran off to," she said. Jess sighed, frowning as she threw herself onto the couch.

"I need them back at Cara Cara," she said, "They were our top earners. I don't get them back, it's going to be harder to get our old clients back."

"I can ask around for you," Lux suggested, "See if some of the girls at Georgie's know where they are." Jess nodded, smiling gratefully at Lux.

"That'd be great," she said, "I ran by Ima's old apartment, but she's not staying there anymore."

"It's a small town. I'm sure somebody knows something," Lux said and Jess nodded. Lux started to the door, her hand on the door knob before she turned around, "Are you staying here tonight or going to Jax's again?" she asked.

"Probably Jax's," Jess replied, "I just needed to pick up some clothes." Lux nodded.

"Okay," she said quietly, "You know… I miss you." Jess glanced up from her spot on the couch to look at Lux.

"I miss you, too," Jess replied, "I just…" her voice trailed off. She didn't know how to explain.

"It happened to me, too, you know," Lux said gently, "You don't have to hide and pretend like everything's okay. You can talk to me." Jess shook her head, turning to look away from Lux.

"I don't want to talk about it," she replied. She felt Lux standing there, waiting, but she finally opened the door.

"Okay, well… you know where to find me if you do," she said before walking out of the door, closing it softly behind her. Jess sighed, exhaling heavily before she stood from the couch. She walked back into her room, a room she'd only slept in a few times over the past few months and only when Jax was on a run. Not that she'd slept much. Every time she closed her eyes all she saw was that guard's knife, raised high before it slammed into her thigh, or Zobelle's face as he sneered at her hatefully. She rubbed her thigh over the scar subconsciously as she stared at her closet, finally grabbing several outfits and throwing them in a duffel bag.

She knocked on Jax's door half an hour later and he opened it, smiling at her as she stepped inside. Abel glanced up from his spot on the floor, running to Jess and wrapping his little arms around her leg as he smiled up at her. She ran her fingers through his blond hair softly, smiling back at him before she turned back to look at Jax, kissing him softly.

"I wasn't sure if I was going to see you today," he said, "How'd it go with the designer?"

"Fine," Jess replied wearily, lifting Abel up and propping him on her hip. She turned back to look at Jax, "You-know-who called me to see when she could see Abel." Jax frowned, his hand cupped behind her head as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"You don't need to be worrying about that right now," Jax said, "I'll set something up with her later." Jess nodded.

"Okay," she replied, kissing him lightly, "I'm really tired. I think I'm just going to head to bed." Jax nodded, obviously struggling to keep a frown off his face.

"You sure?" he asked, "I was just about to put Abel to bed." Jess nodded.

"Yeah, it's been a long day," she said.

"Okay," Jax said, disappointment in his voice, as Jess handed Abel over to him, kissing Abel lightly on the cheek before walking back to the bedroom.

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Jess was still struggling to fall asleep by the time Jax crawled into bed next to her. He wrapped his arms around her and she snuggled closer to him. That was the only place she'd felt safe in months but it was still long after his breathing steadied that she finally fell into an uneasy sleep.

She woke the next morning to her phone ringing and turned to see Jax still lying beside her, fast asleep. She groaned, throwing her arm out to reach for her phone and finally grabbed it, glancing at the caller ID to see Lux's name on the display. She flipped the phone open, pressing it against her ear.

"Hullo?" she said sleepily.

"Hey, sorry for calling so early," Lux said, "I just wanted to tell you, I asked around about Ima and Lyla for you and one of the girls heard they were working at Diosa International now."

"What's that?" Jess said, her words coming out mumbled from her sleepiness.

"Well it's supposed to be like a uh… I dunno, a massage place or something," Lux said, "But word around is it's an escort service." Jess rubbed her hand over her face wearily, finally sitting up.

"You're telling me Ima and Lyla are getting pimped out?" Jess asked.

"Apparently," Lux responded, "Pimp's name is Nero Padilla. Diosa's out on the Morada border, off 8 mile."

"Jesus Christ," Jess muttered, "Okay. Looks like I'll be having a chat with a pimp today."

"Oh lord," Lux said, "Do me a favor - bring Jax or one of the guys with you. I don't know anything about this guy."

"Yeah, I will," Jess promised.

"Okay, well I'll let you go back to sleep. Let me know how it goes at Diosa," Lux said. Jess flipped her phone shut, lying back down at the bed as she stared up at the ceiling. She was getting Ima and Lyla out of that "escort service" if it was the last thing she did.

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Jax reluctantly agreed to take Jess to Diosa that afternoon. He didn't like the idea of Jess confronting some pimp he didn't know, but she was insistent and he knew how much she needed Ima and Lyla back at Cara Cara. It wasn't a far drive; Morada was less than 10 minutes from Charming and in no time Jax was pulling into Diosa's parking lot, Jess's arms wrapped tightly around his waist.

They hopped off the bike and walked through the front doors inside. A Hispanic woman who looked to be in her mid-40s glanced up at them from behind the reception desk as they walked up. She frowned, looking between Jax and Jess. Jess turned to look at Jax.

"Please let me do this," she said, "Just… be my bodyguard today." Jax grinned, nodding.

"Sure thing," he said. He held back as Jess approached the reception desk, smiling at the woman.

"Yes?" she asked.

"I'm looking for Ima and Lyla," Jess told the woman.

"And you are?" the woman asked, the tone of her voice clearly indicating that she had no intention of helping Jess out.

"I'm Jess Tyler and I want to talk to Ima and Lyla," Jess responded firmly. The woman continued to stare back at her.

"I don't know any Ima or Lyla," she finally replied, turning back to some paperwork in front of her.

"I know they're here!" Jess said, her voice rising in anger, "And I want to talk to them right. fucking. NOW!"

As she shouted, a man walked out from the hallway behind the reception desk, looking quizzically at Jess. Jess's eyes turned to look at him, widening slightly. He was tall, dark-skinned and about 50 years old, but he was well built and Jess had no qualms in thinking that he could hurt her if he wanted to.

"What's the problem?" he asked. Jess braced herself, turning to look at the man as she put her brave face on.

"I'm looking for Ima and Lyla," Jess repeated.

"I'm guessing you don't want to make an appointment," the man said, his lips turned in a small grin.

"Um… no," Jess replied, "I just want to talk to them." The man nodded, looking at Jess thoughtfully, his eyes briefly flicking to Jax who was still standing by the door.

"So you must be the Cara Cara girl," he said, turning his eyes back to Jess. Jess wasn't able to hide the surprise on her face that he knew who she was, but she wiped it away quickly as she nodded.

"Yeah, I am the Cara Cara girl," Jess said, "And you must be Nero." He nodded in affirmation.

"That's me," he said.

"Well, _Nero,_ if you try to stop my girls from coming back and force them to stay in your little whore house, we're going to have a problem," Jess said, trying to sound menacing but worried it was just coming off as ridiculous. It made Nero laugh, at least, as he held his hands up in surrender.

"Whoa, chica," he said, still chuckling at her, "It's not like that. I don't _force_ anyone to do anything."

"Yeah… well…" Jess replied. That statement didn't align with anything she knew about pimps and she wasn't willing to take his word for it, "I'd like to hear it from _them_."

"You can't talk to him like that," the woman behind the receptionist desk said, standing up with her arms crossed across her chest.

"Chill, Carla," Nero said easily, waving her down, "We're just talking business owner to business owner." Carla glared at him, pursing her lips, but finally took her seat again. Nero turned back to Jess.

"I got no problem with you talking to them," Nero said, "They're down in room 7."

"They're together?" Jess asked. Nero nodded.

"Yeah, they're kind of a… double act, if you get my drift," he said. Jess grimaced, shaking her head as she glanced back at Jax.

"I'll be right back," she said and Jax nodded as Jess turned to walk down the hall, knocking on the door to room 7.

Lyla opened the door, her eyebrows raised in surprise to see Jess standing there. She glanced behind her briefly before turning back to Jess, stepping back to let Jess in. She walked into the large room to see Ima lounging on the couch, flipping through channels on the TV. She glanced up when Jess walked in, looking as surprised as Lyla to see her there.

"Hey, Jess," Ima said, standing up to walk over to them.

"Hey guys, long time," Jess replied. They both nodded, looking back at her expectantly.

"Cara Cara is going to be reopening soon," Jess started, thinking it was best to skip the small talk and get straight to it, "I want you to come back." Ima and Lyla exchanged glances before turning back to look at Jess.

"We'll only come back if we can still work here, too," Lyla replied as Ima nodded next to her. Jess frowned, looking between them. Were they too scared to tell Nero they didn't have to work for him anymore?

"I'm not sure if that'll work…" Jess said slowly.

"Then we're not coming back," Ima replied easily.

"You have to come back!" Jess said, a pleading note in her voice, "You were my best girls."

"Well… we're Nero's girls now," Ima said.

"Is he forcing you to stay here?" Jess asked, "Has he threatened you? Because I can get you help and get you out of here. You don't have to stay here." Ima and Lyla grinned, both shaking their heads.

"No, it's not like that," Lyla said, "We like it here. Nero's great, he treats us great, takes good care of us. And the money is way too good to pass up." Jess frowned. What kind of pimp was Nero? She'd never heard of one whose pros would say he's a great guy.

"Really?" Jess finally asked, "You're sure you want to stay here?" They both nodded and Jess sighed.

"Okay, then I'll see what I can work out with Nero. I really need you guys at the club," Jess said. They nodded again as Jess turned to walk out the door, closing it behind her. She paused beside the closed door, shaking her head. She had envisioned this talk going much differently. She'd thought they'd jump at the chance to get back to Cara Cara if it meant they didn't have to whore themselves out anymore for some pimp who took 90% of their earnings. Apparently that wasn't the way it worked at Diosa, but Jess couldn't wrap her head around it. She finally walked back into the main room to see Nero and Jax deep in conversation by the door. They both looked up as she walked out and Nero smiled at her, walking back over to her.

"See, it's all good, right?" Nero asked. Jess nodded her head.

"I guess so," she said, "I need to talk to you. Ima and Lyla were my top earners at Cara Cara and they were responsible for a lot of our business. I need them back, but they'll only come back if you and I can work something out so they can continue working here as well." Nero nodded, shrugging.

"I don't have a problem with that," he said, "We usually make appointments at least a week ahead of time, so just let me know their schedule and I'll work around it. I know they've got a few standing appointments every week so I'll check the schedule and let you know when those are. Oh, and I'll need them at least one day a week for walk ins or …emergencies." Jess raised her eyebrows and Nero shrugged.

"Hey, it happens," he said and Jess attempted to refrain from rolling her eyes.

"Okay, I can handle that," Jess said. Nero walked over to the receptionist desk, grabbing a card from a stack on the counter and handed it to Jess.

"There's my number," he said, "Just call with their schedule." Jess nodded, sticking the card in her pocket.

"You're a very laid back pimp," Jess commented, looking back at Nero. He grinned.

"I prefer the term _companionator_," he said. Jess chuckled, shaking her head.

"Okay, well, you'll be hearing from me," she said. He nodded as she turned back around, walking back to Jax as they walked back outside to Jax's bike.

"Well that was interesting," Jess commented as she buckled her helmet on. Jax nodded.

"He seems like a cool guy," he said. Jess nodded. He did seem like a cool guy. Color her surprised.

SOASOASOASOASOASOASOA

The grand opening of Cara Cara was looming ever nearer and Jess's stress level had never been so high. Construction was completely finished, but there was still so much to do with decorating, ordering supplies and alcohol, and getting everyone on the pay roll. Opening a second bar upstairs had seemed like a good idea at the time, but it was now going to be impossible to pull off for the opening, so Jess was leaving the space empty for now.

She still had no idea how to run a business. The management training from Luann had been helpful, but now with the thought of trying to run the whole club by herself without Luann there to guide her made her ill. She'd sought advice from Gemma, who'd been practically single-handedly running Teller-Morrow for decades, but there were only so many things an auto-shop and a strip club had in common. There were so many details that Jess didn't even know about, and she constantly worried that she was going to run the club into the ground before she even had a chance to learn them.

She'd spent the entire day ordering the furniture delivery men around and as she pulled up to Jax's all she wanted was to take a quick shower and go to bed. That had been the routine lately. She knocked quietly on the door and it took Jax several moments to open it. She walked in and he smiled at her, kissing her lightly.

"Hey," he said, "How'd it go today?" Jess sighed, shaking her head.

"Fine, I guess," she said, "I just want to take a shower and go to bed." Jax nodded, looking away from her. Jess could tell he was holding back saying something to her.

"What?" Jess asked. Jax shrugged.

"Nothing," he said, "It just seems that's all you do now. We spend every night together and I feel like I haven't seen you in months." Jess sighed, looking up at the ceiling.

"I've been really busy," she reminded him. Jax nodded.

"Yeah, I know," he said, "But you don't have to be. There's plenty of people around that have been offering to help, me included. You need some time to just relax." Jess stared back at him, knowing he was right. She'd declined help from anyone who'd offered, which was just about everyone in the club, including Gemma and Lux.

"I can't relax," Jess finally said. Jax wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer to him as he brushed a strand of hair out of her face.

"Yeah, you can," he said, "You don't have to be running yourself ragged. Learn to delegate, take a day off." Jess shook her head.

"No, I mean… it's literally impossible for me to relax," she said, sighing. She shook her head, feeling tears forming and wanting to stop them before they became uncontrollable. Jax's brow furrowed in worry as he looked down at her, stroking her back softly.

"What do you mean?" he asked. Jess finally looked up at him, her eyes wide.

"I mean every time I stop… every time my mind isn't 100 percent focused on something else, it goes straight back to Zobelle," she said, "I can't relax because every time I try, all I can think about is that day." Jax frowned, pulling her closer to him as he wrapped his arms completely around her.

"He can't hurt you ever again," he said quietly, "Why didn't you tell me you were feeling like that?" Jess shook her head as a single tear finally made its way down her cheek.

"I didn't want you feeling guilty," she said, "I know you blame yourself for what happened, and I didn't want to add anything to that." Jax sighed, pulling back slightly so he could look down at her face. He cupped the side of her head in his palm, his fingers trailing through her hair.

"I don't want you to hide stuff like this from me," he said, "No matter how you think it might make me feel."

Jess nodded as more tears poured down her face and she started sobbing into his shoulder, letting out all of the tears she'd been holding back. Crying over that day with Zobelle, Miles' death, the ache she still felt over the loss of Luann. Crying over the fact that she had felt closer to death that day than she had even when she'd been shot. Crying at the irony that she was finally surrounded by people she loved and that staying near them meant her life was constantly threatened. Crying because she hadn't been sure if it would ever end and now that Zobelle was dead, she was always afraid that a new enemy would surface.

Jess wasn't sure how long she'd stayed in Jax's arms, sobbing inconsolably, but after a while her tears began to lighten and she began to calm. And by the time she had cried as much as she possible could, she realized she had no more tears left for what happened to her at that warehouse. It was over. She looked up at Jax, giving him a small smile through her puffy, red eyes and her blotchy cheeks.

"Feel better?" Jax asked, his face still lined with worry as he looked down at her. She nodded.

"Much better," she said and he smiled back at her, leaning down to kiss her. He could taste the tears on her lips and he kissed her until every last one was gone.

* * *

**_Author's Note: _Originally with this story, we were going to include a sequel from the original New Start and I had mentioned that a couple of times in author's notes as well as private messages with some of y'all. It's now looking like we won't be able to do that. I feel like if we kept going, updates would be even less frequent than they already are and the writing quality would decline. So we are now planning to wrap this part of the story up sooner than expected and then later on when the motivation has returned, write the sequel. We both love the universe created with New Start and we absolutely love our OC's, but we just don't feel we can do the story justice right now. **

**To clarify, I'm not saying this is the last chapter of this part of the story. There will be more to come, it just won't be as long as we originally had planned on. We still have a couple of story lines that need to be wrapped up and we definitely want to do all of those justice, but we had a ton of ideas for the sequel and we have decided to save those and write an actual sequel when we have more time and motivation/inspiration, instead of trying to ask you all to wait so long for updates or post chapters that are not at the quality we would hope for. **

**Again, tons and tons of apologies for the inexcusable delay in posting and I hope you are still reading and that you enjoyed this chapter! I definitely want to know your thoughts about it! :) **

**Thanks! **


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